Dear fiftysomething naked guy in the gym locker room...

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  • AnaVerasGettingFit
    AnaVerasGettingFit Posts: 109 Member
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    There's a lady at my gym like that. She's an older hippie chic and doesn't use deodorant (or so I assume because she has major BO).... but then she gets into the sauna and takes up the whole space. She likes to lay down on a platform all to herself, with her legs bent and wide open, and she swings them open and closed, and sometimes just leaves them wide open in a stretch. Did I say she was a hippie chic? I want to reiterate this because she has a MONSTER b..... Anyhoo. Sick shiznit. I usually leave right away because I don't know whether she's showered yet or not and I do not want to be catching that waft of that hot sauna air. Ughhfhfdfaslkfjas;lkfj;sfkja. Sorry, guys! I think I just ruined it :\
  • waguchan
    waguchan Posts: 450 Member
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    I just love it at my gym when I have to take my 5 year old to go potty. The only bathrooms are in the locker rooms. Sometimes, my daughter points at naked old ladies and yells, "EWWWWWW!!!!! SHE'S NAKED!!!!"

    My husband hates taking her to the gym day care without me because if she has to go potty, he has to take her into the men's locker room with all those naked guys standing around. An extra bathroom outside of the locker rooms would be nice.
  • yoli830
    yoli830 Posts: 15
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    I have been doing a lot of home work outs lately, but planning on starting back at the gym this weekend... but there is a group of girls that are always there, using up the machines for "poses"...so here is my vent...

    Dear teenage-slutty-loudmouth-screaming-hey-take-my-picture-im-going-put-it-on-facebook-cuz-guys-think-its-hot-when-girls-workout-but-i-wouldn't-dare-really-workout-cuz-just got-my-highlights-done-and-don't-want-to-sweat-pansy-*kitten*..... GET OFF OF MY MACHINE!!!!! I am here to actually do something to improve myself. I am here to make a change. Go pose in front of the mirror with a couple of pink 3 lb weights for your %&#$#% facebook picture... and don't forget the pink lipgloss, mascara and the stupid pouty lip face when you pose.... Stop wasting my precious time!!! :mad:

    I am silently hoping one of them will drop a dumbell on their foot... now THAT would be a GREAT facebook picture :devil:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: OMG I can't stop laughing!!! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who feels like this.

    And you've gotta love the oh so popular "guy-sitting-on-the-incline-bench-I-need-for-45-minutes-while-doing-one set-of -curls- with-20lb-weights-while-talking-to-his freshly-manicured-perfectly-matched-large-hoop-earring-wearing-incessantly-giggling-and-hair-flipping-but-never-actually-working-out-girlfriend" They looked like a couple of tools lol. This happened to me last night. So I went up and nicely asked if I could get a set in and he and the girlfriend both looked at me and he said, can't you see I'm working out? Then I got really mad and said first off, chatting up your girlfriend while wearing sweats and standing in the gym isn't actually considered working out, and second, I do my warm ups with heavier weights than what I saw you using and I'm a girl. And the other guys in the weight area must have agreed with me, because a few of them actually started clapping lol. And the guy and his girlfriend ended up packing their stuff up and leaving.

    Weeding out the frickin tools, one by one :smile:
  • yoli830
    yoli830 Posts: 15
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    Oh come to the ladies locker room at my gym where "Pancakes" as we have nick-named her (yes, she is in the over 50 crowd) stands full-on naked in front of the counter while she procedes to do the following tasks:

    - Lotion
    - tooth brush
    - deoderant
    - hair dryer
    - make-up
    - NAIL POLISH!!!

    Then, she gets dressed, leaves the locker room and always leaves the completely useless towel on the counter instead of the hamper. I just don't get it.

    PANCAKES! LMFAO! That is hilarious! Gross, but hilarious!!! I'm getting a cramp from laughing so hard :laugh:
  • LifeOnMars_
    LifeOnMars_ Posts: 755 Member
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    nudie.gif


    :laugh:
  • Pakitalian
    Pakitalian Posts: 218 Member
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    I have been doing a lot of home work outs lately, but planning on starting back at the gym this weekend... but there is a group of girls that are always there, using up the machines for "poses"...so here is my vent...

    Dear teenage-slutty-loudmouth-screaming-hey-take-my-picture-im-going-put-it-on-facebook-cuz-guys-think-its-hot-when-girls-workout-but-i-wouldn't-dare-really-workout-cuz-just got-my-highlights-done-and-don't-want-to-sweat-pansy-*kitten*..... GET OFF OF MY MACHINE!!!!! I am here to actually do something to improve myself. I am here to make a change. Go pose in front of the mirror with a couple of pink 3 lb weights for your %&#$#% facebook picture... and don't forget the pink lipgloss, mascara and the stupid pouty lip face when you pose.... Stop wasting my precious time!!! :mad:

    I am silently hoping one of them will drop a dumbell on their foot... now THAT would be a GREAT facebook picture :devil:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: OMG I can't stop laughing!!! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who feels like this.

    And you've gotta love the oh so popular "guy-sitting-on-the-incline-bench-I-need-for-45-minutes-while-doing-one set-of -curls- with-20lb-weights-while-talking-to-his freshly-manicured-perfectly-matched-large-hoop-earring-wearing-incessantly-giggling-and-hair-flipping-but-never-actually-working-out-girlfriend" They looked like a couple of tools lol. This happened to me last night. So I went up and nicely asked if I could get a set in and he and the girlfriend both looked at me and he said, can't you see I'm working out? Then I got really mad and said first off, chatting up your girlfriend while wearing sweats and standing in the gym isn't actually considered working out, and second, I do my warm ups with heavier weights than what I saw you using and I'm a girl. And the other guys in the weight area must have agreed with me, because a few of them actually started clapping lol. And the guy and his girlfriend ended up packing their stuff up and leaving.

    Weeding out the frickin tools, one by one :smile:


    hahahaha...LOVE. THIS. You are a rockstar!!! I would have added "funny, you aren't the same guy she was here with last week"
  • mcdonl
    mcdonl Posts: 342 Member
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    Love the super American reaction to nudity! Try being an American in any gym in Europe! You're the odd one out if you have a towel around you in the locker room, sauna or steam room. Always naked except when working out!

    Nothing wrong with modesty either.
  • yoli830
    yoli830 Posts: 15
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    I have been doing a lot of home work outs lately, but planning on starting back at the gym this weekend... but there is a group of girls that are always there, using up the machines for "poses"...so here is my vent...

    Dear teenage-slutty-loudmouth-screaming-hey-take-my-picture-im-going-put-it-on-facebook-cuz-guys-think-its-hot-when-girls-workout-but-i-wouldn't-dare-really-workout-cuz-just got-my-highlights-done-and-don't-want-to-sweat-pansy-*kitten*..... GET OFF OF MY MACHINE!!!!! I am here to actually do something to improve myself. I am here to make a change. Go pose in front of the mirror with a couple of pink 3 lb weights for your %&#$#% facebook picture... and don't forget the pink lipgloss, mascara and the stupid pouty lip face when you pose.... Stop wasting my precious time!!! :mad:

    I am silently hoping one of them will drop a dumbell on their foot... now THAT would be a GREAT facebook picture :devil:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: OMG I can't stop laughing!!! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who feels like this.

    And you've gotta love the oh so popular "guy-sitting-on-the-incline-bench-I-need-for-45-minutes-while-doing-one set-of -curls- with-20lb-weights-while-talking-to-his freshly-manicured-perfectly-matched-large-hoop-earring-wearing-incessantly-giggling-and-hair-flipping-but-never-actually-working-out-girlfriend" They looked like a couple of tools lol. This happened to me last night. So I went up and nicely asked if I could get a set in and he and the girlfriend both looked at me and he said, can't you see I'm working out? Then I got really mad and said first off, chatting up your girlfriend while wearing sweats and standing in the gym isn't actually considered working out, and second, I do my warm ups with heavier weights than what I saw you using and I'm a girl. And the other guys in the weight area must have agreed with me, because a few of them actually started clapping lol. And the guy and his girlfriend ended up packing their stuff up and leaving.

    Weeding out the frickin tools, one by one :smile:


    hahahaha...LOVE. THIS. You are a rockstar!!! I would have added "funny, you aren't the same guy she was here with last week"

    OMG That's what my husband said! He was like, jeez babe, if you were gonna tell that guy off for talking to that chick you should've at least let him know she does the same thing with another guy on Monday nights! LOL

    Great minds must think alike!
  • GrammyWhammy
    GrammyWhammy Posts: 484 Member
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    Don't put this on the "old folks." I'm 60-ish and wouldn't DREAM of inflicting my droops, wrinkles and rolls on anyone, ever! Just chalk it up to no couth or modesty, a condition that affects all ages, genders and conditions!:noway:

    Oh, and I second the NO PERFUME/COLOGNE rant!:frown:
  • Z_I_L_L_A
    Z_I_L_L_A Posts: 2,399 Member
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    Don't put this on the "old folks." I'm 60-ish and wouldn't DREAM of inflicting my droops, wrinkles and rolls on anyone, ever! Just chalk it up to no couth or modesty, a condition that affects all ages, genders and conditions!:noway:

    Oh, and I second the NO PERFUME/COLOGNE rant!:frown:

    You gotta earn the right to be nude all over the place. Maybe if the in shape people were nude these people would put a towel on, just sayin.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
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    There are so many women at my gym, both young and old, who walk about bare-naked, doing their hair, makeup, etc. I don't get it. Maybe I'm a prude but I could never be naked like that anywhere, especially at the gym!
  • Mixmode
    Mixmode Posts: 332
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    Like the OP said. A locker room is just that. However, if you played sports back in high school or college you do get in the mindset of not rushing to strip/wash/dress in a matter of minutes. Talking yadda yadda yadda while nude or semi-dressed is the norm. NFL & NBA locker rooms are just like that. No one is quick to do everything asap cuz you are all the same gender. SO what's to worry?

    For those that have little locker room experience it's easy to get offended by those as listed above cuz dressing 'seems' like the decent thing to do. Personally, I don't get offended but yeah I don't wanna talk politics to a bag of wrinkles with an even more wrinkly hang-down if I can avoid it. And I usually do.
  • chersheppard
    chersheppard Posts: 42 Member
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    Best thread ever!:laugh:
  • EmpressOfJudgment
    EmpressOfJudgment Posts: 1,162 Member
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    Personally, I can't wait til I'm old and have lost all my inhibitions. I'm looking forward to making young people feel awkward in about 25 years.

    This is funny....
    I'm glad someone appreciates my sense of humor.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: OMG I can't stop laughing!!! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who feels like this.

    And you've gotta love the oh so popular "guy-sitting-on-the-incline-bench-I-need-for-45-minutes-while-doing-one set-of -curls- with-20lb-weights-while-talking-to-his freshly-manicured-perfectly-matched-large-hoop-earring-wearing-incessantly-giggling-and-hair-flipping-but-never-actually-working-out-girlfriend" They looked like a couple of tools lol. This happened to me last night. So I went up and nicely asked if I could get a set in and he and the girlfriend both looked at me and he said, can't you see I'm working out? Then I got really mad and said first off, chatting up your girlfriend while wearing sweats and standing in the gym isn't actually considered working out, and second, I do my warm ups with heavier weights than what I saw you using and I'm a girl. And the other guys in the weight area must have agreed with me, because a few of them actually started clapping lol. And the guy and his girlfriend ended up packing their stuff up and leaving.

    Weeding out the frickin tools, one by one :smile:

    You are TOTALLY my hero! LOL
    This is the funniest thread I've read in a long time. I laughed through lunch reading it too. :laugh:
  • garyolson43
    garyolson43 Posts: 28 Member
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    I am fiftysomething and I would never stand naked in a locker room and have a conversation with someone. I don't think it is a generational thing. I think the dude is just weird. I would of walked away.
  • Blossom41290
    Blossom41290 Posts: 27 Member
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    dear girl with the pink hair

    You know when the class is very full and you come and stand by us, in your colourful tights, and your little miss naughty yellow t shirt, and your hair with a splashing of pink on the front. Well i know you like to dance and all, but please refrain from coming to the class and dancing and everytime opening your legs, you smelled the whole class out, i was not the only one who smelled you ok, i saw the girls turn their noses up and move away from you. You smell like you urinated yourself 5 months ago, and have been wearing the same tampon for 3 months, it was like a rotten eel with a rotten fish and 5 old dirty tampons in a mens urinal, you really smelled so bad, causing me and 15 other women to leave the class, you know you smelled just dont.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    dear girl with the pink hair

    You know when the class is very full and you come and stand by us, in your colourful tights, and your little miss naughty yellow t shirt, and your hair with a splashing of pink on the front. Well i know you like to dance and all, but please refrain from coming to the class and dancing and everytime opening your legs, you smelled the whole class out, i was not the only one who smelled you ok, i saw the girls turn their noses up and move away from you. You smell like you urinated yourself 5 months ago, and have been wearing the same tampon for 3 months, it was like a rotten eel with a rotten fish and 5 old dirty tampons in a mens urinal, you really smelled so bad, causing me and 15 other women to leave the class, you know you smelled just dont.

    eewwwwww!!!
  • MrsLVF
    MrsLVF Posts: 787 Member
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    dear girl with the pink hair

    You know when the class is very full and you come and stand by us, in your colourful tights, and your little miss naughty yellow t shirt, and your hair with a splashing of pink on the front. Well i know you like to dance and all, but please refrain from coming to the class and dancing and everytime opening your legs, you smelled the whole class out, i was not the only one who smelled you ok, i saw the girls turn their noses up and move away from you. You smell like you urinated yourself 5 months ago, and have been wearing the same tampon for 3 months, it was like a rotten eel with a rotten fish and 5 old dirty tampons in a mens urinal, you really smelled so bad, causing me and 15 other women to leave the class, you know you smelled just dont.

    Nasty! That sounds like the lady at my gym that uses the hand dryer after workouts do dry off her "stuff". Clearly she has no sense of smell, or is a homeless hooker. lol
  • Resalyn
    Resalyn Posts: 528 Member
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    dear girl with the pink hair

    You know when the class is very full and you come and stand by us, in your colourful tights, and your little miss naughty yellow t shirt, and your hair with a splashing of pink on the front. Well i know you like to dance and all, but please refrain from coming to the class and dancing and everytime opening your legs, you smelled the whole class out, i was not the only one who smelled you ok, i saw the girls turn their noses up and move away from you. You smell like you urinated yourself 5 months ago, and have been wearing the same tampon for 3 months, it was like a rotten eel with a rotten fish and 5 old dirty tampons in a mens urinal, you really smelled so bad, causing me and 15 other women to leave the class, you know you smelled just dont.

    OMG, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little....

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