what is the ideal age to get engaged/married?

Dtho5159

I started dating my husband when I was 18, engaged at 19, married at 20 and had our first baby 6 days before I turned 21. We have been married 8 years in June and added another baby to the mix and are doing just fine

SuzyQq02

I don't think there is one right answer for everyone. I got married at 23 (MH is 2 years older than me), and many people consider that to be pretty young, especially where we're from (MA, average age of first marriage is higher here than elsewhere). We really wanted to enjoy being married for awhile before we started a family, and 4.5 years later, we're just getting to the point of being ready to consider the kids thing.

Both MH and I have been described as mature beyond our years, and felt like it was the right time to get married. It wouldn't work for everyone, but it worked for us

jeccalou

Hello, I got married young but I wouldnt trade it for anything.. it honestly depends on the person & when they find the one.. I got engaged at 18 and got married at 20.

but you are still 20. so yeah. um. i'd hope you'd still be happy.

:laugh: :laugh:

I have been with my husband for 6 years..I will be 21 in a month.. I am very happy.. you say you have been divorced how many times? I would say you need to look into youself before you start pointing fingers and making judgments

Creepy.

What's creepy?
Sounds like they were high school sweethearts and got married when she was 20.

GetFitE

When they land a sweet job and you don't have to sign any prenups..

Even with a sweet job, I'm still signing a prenup. Thankfully my boyfriend was TOTALLY cool with my idea of having 3 accounts: his, hers, and shared (for house/kid/bills type of responsibilities). Our prenup will only split the shared account and not touch our individual accounts.

I'm not married nor engaged. I'm 2 weeks from being 25 and not close to the engagement line either (although in a very serious relationship with a 30 year old, who, too, is not ready to get married). I have plans on going back to school to advance my career...and I'd rather have this aspect of school out of the way... a) I don't have to report him on taxes, therefore can prob get more financial aid, and b) when I graduate from school I'll be making more money, therefore making us more stable.

Mentally & emotionally, we're both ready for it, but financially and physically we're not--so we wait.

EBFNP

I always thought I would be married in my late 20s ...27-29 and then have my first child soon after. I hope it happens

Ladydi1982

I met my husband at 19, got engaged at 26, married at 28 and will be turning 30 in April, having our first child in May. I honestly think it's all about your personalities. My husband and I are perfect for each other. Sure we bicker and argue sometimes, but that is healthy. We constantly think of the other person and have serious conversations as well as spend time together. We also spend time apart with our friends. You have to work together as a unit, otherwise it just won't work.

oddyogi

Even with a sweet job, I'm still signing a prenup. Thankfully my boyfriend was TOTALLY cool with my idea of having 3 accounts: his, hers, and shared (for house/kid/bills type of responsibilities). Our prenup will only split the shared account and not touch our individual accounts.

I'm not married nor engaged. I'm 2 weeks from being 25 and not close to the engagement line either (although in a very serious relationship with a 30 year old, who, too, is not ready to get married). I have plans on going back to school to advance my career...and I'd rather have this aspect of school out of the way... a) I don't have to report him on taxes, therefore can prob get more financial aid, and b) when I graduate from school I'll be making more money, therefore making us more stable.

Mentally & emotionally, we're both ready for it, but financially and physically we're not--so we wait.

Happy early birthday. Mine is on Saturday and I'm turning 25 too. :flowerforyou: :drinker:

poustotah

I got married when I was 17. Divorced when I was 20. We were high school sweethearts. I got re-married when I was 28 and by then I was comfortable with myself, the drama was gone, and I'd grown up a LOT. I don't think there is a right or wrong age I think everyone is different.

unmitigatedbadassery

When you are BOTH mature enough to accept that a relationship requires diligence on both parts. Not until then.

cakeums

Married at 23, first kid at 25, 2nd at 27, still happily together at 31. I'll admit, I'm not expert and by the time 40 rolls around things could change - but these ages felt right to me. Looking back, they still look like the right choices.

There's tons of good and bad advice out there on being married at any age, so I don't think there's a good answer to your question. So many factors...

The only thing I'd stress - don't have kids thinking it'll bring you closer together. Although I've heard of that happening to people, all I've found is kids add a TON of stress to mix and being a good "team" is absolutely required. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, and IMHO they are "good" kids - but they are easily the most difficult thing I've ever been involved with (but the rewards are great!).

...are you my husband in disguise? LOL! Sounds exactly like something he would say. Especially the part about being a team - if you can't agree on the fundamentals of parenting, then you will turn what is already a stressful experience into something that just drives you completely apart.

1Timothy4v8

I am a born again bible beleiver so I believe that premarital sex is a sin so my opinion is 18, as long as you find another person that is about cometment it can work getting married young, my in laws married at 17 and they are solif as a rock,

I got married at 22 goto find the right one

HauteP1nk

At one point I would have said never. However, now I'd say late 20's or early 30's....

kaetmarie

i got engaged when i was 24, married when i was 25, and now i'm the ripe old age of 26 :laugh:

seriously though, i thought i'd never get married until i was AT LEAST 30, but then i met husband and he was most definitely MY husband it's all about being ready and meeting the right person, in my opinion.

denveralexis

i'll think about it when im 320

haha that made me giggle :laugh:

cakeums

I do totally and completely echo the sentiment that it all depends on the person. I know people who are contemplating marriage in their early 20s and I cringe, and others who I'm over the moon for. Some people are clearly ready, some are not and just think they are. However, it doesn't really matter what I think anyway! Their life, not mine.

sharibob3

NEVER........but if you REALLY want to id say mid 20s

The NEVER part was the first thing that came to my mind!! ;-)

NoAdditives

It depends on a lot of things. Putting a specific time line on it will only make you more likely to settle for someone who isn't your soul mate.

But, in an ideal, perfect situation, mid-20's is a good age. That way you're young and healthy and the risks of genetic disorders in your children is minimal.

christenapanzone

I think I'm glad I haven't married yet. I'm 29 and the right person hasn't come along. Bottom line..it's when you are ready. I have to agree with some of the other posts about it being late 20's into your 30's though. My pre 25 self would have been divorced quickly.

cindycoley19

It depends on the relationship in my opinion, however the older the better for maturity and life experiences that mold you into who you are as an adult.

Pfauxmeh

Got married at 19. Both of us can acknowledge we could have waited. We were in a big damn hurry.

Still happy.

badgerbadger1

Hello, I got married young but I wouldnt trade it for anything.. it honestly depends on the person & when they find the one.. I got engaged at 18 and got married at 20.

but you are still 20. so yeah. um. i'd hope you'd still be happy.

:laugh: :laugh:

I have been with my husband for 6 years..I will be 21 in a month.. I am very happy.. you say you have been divorced how many times? I would say you need to look into youself before you start pointing fingers and making judgments

Creepy.

What's creepy?
Sounds like they were high school sweethearts and got married when she was 20.

Sorry I read it as married 6 years ago, so at 15.

Erinslove

mid to late 30s

nrvo

I would say mid 20's.

I was 20 and my hubby was 23 when we started dating.....23 and 27 when we got married five years ago. Still happy and going strong, planning on kids in a few years

gordonfitch

I am a born again bible beleiver so I believe that premarital sex is a sin so my opinion is 18,

I don't remember reading in the Bible that you should marry at 18?

Blueberry09

I worry about those who have a plan- married by this age, baby by this age. My son's gf has such a plan and I'm concerned she's more in love with the idea of being married and planning a wedding than she is about marriage. I think having a plan is only setting yourself up to be disappointed when it doesn't work out like you thought it would.

I was engaged and living together at 20. Married at 23 and still together at 46. For myself, the day after I got married was exactly the same as the day before - if you think it's going to be different, then you're not at the right age!

Megclark37

lovin these answers! cannot believe how many people are against marriage, hm.

TiffanyDeanee

Personally I AM going to wait until after I am 30 and see from there. I'm 22 now and I get tired of dating the same guy after about a year and that even depends on how exciting and fun he stays. So it would be horrible for me to get married in my 20's, get bored with my husband, then ask for a divorce.

kellyo15

It all depends on the relationship! I'd say the best guideline is when you're both ready, mature enough and somewhat stable financially and career-wise. We started dating when I was 18 and he was 21. Always knew we'd marry each other someday, but thought that if we were going to be together forever then there is no need to rush into anything. Got engaged after 6 years, (at 25 for me) and we are getting married 4 months from today! I'll be 26 and he will be 29 and we'll be close to the 8-year mark by then.

Darkskinned88

i wanna say 26-27 (3-4 years from now for me personally) i dont wanna be 30 years old playing house and i cant possibly see myself getting married now fresh outta school still deciding on a career

SilmaraC

It really depends...
I was engaged at 21 and married right before my 23rd bday. We had dated for 7 years by the time we got married so although we were young, we already knew each other very well. With that being said, we have changed/grown a lot since we got married but luckily we're still going strong 5 years later. Marriage is not easy. It is hard work, every single day.