"Lost 100lbs & found out what the world thinks of fat ppl"

purplemilly12

is anyone else NOT inspired by this?! my heart is breaking for all women in society!! not to sound like a flaming feminist, but are we just OBJECTS? existing only to be beautiful things for men to adore and want to ****?! i freaking HATE this. when i wear sweatpants and no makeup i am invisible, but when i look extra beautiful (makeup/tight clothes/sundress) suddenly its like i am queen on the universe and everyone stares and awkwardly stammers and says `im sorry` if they accidentally walk too close to me.

no. i hate this. and i hate this even more because of how true it is.

i treat everyone the same. i will hold open the door for an overweight person in a wheelchair just as quickly as i would hold open the door for ms. america. i would (AND DO) strike up a conversation with anyone, regardless of what they look like just the same. i dont say mean things about fat people even to the secretly on side at my friends, i cringe when my friends do it and i call them out on it. i dont hate fat people, bash them, think theyre lazy/disgusting/hideous because I DONT KNOW THEIR STRUGGLE so i cant judge them. society sickens me and i hate that you have to look good to be treated like a person what is WRONG with this picture?! wake UP.:explode:

i totally agree with u everyone should be treated the same we all deserve respect

mscoco10

this is so true. i've struggled with my weight since middle school. people are so mean to you just because your fat. they treat you like you don't even deserve to be alive. i always stayed positive because i love me no what what. It does hurt when people say you look so good now. personally I was a much better dresses and phat girl when i was larger. you never saw me with out hair, nails, makeup, and awesome clothing. I try not to take it personally b/c i get that with less weight it has changed my appearance. i 'm no where near my goal but i'm still trying. Society really needs to change its views because health should be your main goal.

jenn1990123

so well written, and seems true. I hoope I make it to the other side one of these days!!

tryinghard2012

This article resonates with me. I'm currently going through this...after losing 174 lbs, I noticed A HUGE difference in the way people treat you...including FAMILY and FRIENDS...

THIS IS MY LIFE. WOWOWOWOWOWOWO!!!

I thought I was the only person going through this. It's a feeling of discomfort...However, it's understandable why society's so ignorant..one word SHALLOW....:sad:

mdsjmom98

I've had people comment that they can see a difference. No matter how much weight I lose, I will always be a big girl. It's ingrained in me, for many reasons. I will look in the mirror and still see a fat girl.

gemmaldavies

makes ya think. good read.

LexieSweetheart

This article resonates with me. I'm currently going through this...after losing 174 lbs

WOW congrats on your loss:)

abberbabber

I'm going to be honest here. This article is very thought-provoking and I'm sympathetic to her experiences..... But what exactly is the author trying to achieve? Apologies or sympathy? Or is she trying to change the way society looks at people that are overweight or "obese?" While tearing someone down because you think you're better than them because they weigh more than you is wrong and superficial, I also don't think it's okay for individuals to be content with being extremely unhealthy. To me, that's like saying alcoholics shouldn't try to change their habits either. Everyone should just stay mum and never interfere when someone is eating themselves to death over the years? What kind of quality of life can you have when you're 100 lbs overweight and you have type 2 Diabetes? My parents have both been technically "obese" for 25+ years and they are 2 of the most amazing people I will ever know. My dad is honest about his responsibility but my mom tends to blame society and anyone other than herself. I have seen firsthand how their excessive weight has robbed them over the years of their health (mental and physical), their happiness, and many life experiences with our family. No one becomes obese or overweight overnight. It takes time and a serious amount of neglect of ourselves to get there. Let's not forget what MFP is about. A healthier life for ourselves by eating right and exercising. Simple. It's not a pity party. Who cares if someone talks behind your back about your weight? I've had that and a bunch of other faults talked about behind my back. There are always going to be people who tear you down in life but who cares? When you know who you are and you feel good about yourself, it's easier to let it roll off your back.

There are ways to help people see that they have a problem without being cruel about it.

groovyfirechick

So sad but so true. I'm glad my boyfriend likes me the way I am and I don't have to worry about trying to find a man because I am not the "ideal" body type. I work primarily around men so it will be interesting to see if any of them say anything as my weight loss continues.

annabellj

Thank you to everyone for reading it! I have read this article many times and it makes me cry. I am no where near my goal of 100 lbs lost, so it also gives me hope, but people always see a common denominator of losing the weight & feeling they can't trust anyone because those same ppl that hated them before now love them. It scares me to think of that. i am currently in love with my best friend. he knows, but says we are only friends. i fear that once i lose the weight he'll like me- and i'll just accept it. i dont want to be treated differently because of my weight but it is a reality for those of us suffering with being overweight.
it's hard to think that some of my closest friends, who say "i look great the way i am" are secretly thinking that i look horrible and should lose weight.

there are other things you gain besides a thin body that changes the way people look at you, confidence, the way you walk, carry yourself. it is not all about being fat, when i was i didnt like myself very much, so that has changed me with the losses. i dont take **** off of any body any more! because I realize that I am worth way more than that. but yes it is sad that it took the weight loss to make me realize it!

SPNLuver83

It's not a cruel world. it's plainly survival of the fittest, nature doing what it does that has enabled it to survive. obese people are unhealthy people and unhealthy people do not survive. it is the same across the animal kingdom board- weak animals get left behind. That's the only way Nature can improve. It is what it is.

Amy_Lynn74

It is so sad the way society judges people and it isn't fair.

abberbabber

It's not a cruel world. it's plainly survival of the fittest, nature doing what it does that has enabled it to survive. obese people are unhealthy people and unhealthy people do not survive. it is the same across the animal kingdom board- weak animals get left behind. That's the only way Nature can improve. It is what it is.

So we should just treat each other like crap because hey, it's nature's way! No thanks, I'll shoot for being a little better than just an animal.

LJCannon

:drinker: I am from Oklahoma too, and a Lot of what you say is true, although I haven't experienced it quite to the degree that this writer has. I do often feel like an "Undercover Spy From Team Fat".

Seesaa

Hello you all. This is an article copied from the link below in which a woman talks about the social stigma of losing 100 lbs. I have read this multiple times. I'm interested in hearing what some of you think about it.


"I come from a small-ish town in Oklahoma where we’ve never met a vegetable we couldn’t fry and the only thing more super-sized than our portions are the huge church complexes that alternate with fast-food restaurants along our roads.
So it maybe isn’t such a big surprise that by the time I graduated from high school, I weighed 260 pounds. My prom dress was a size 24, and my mother had to help me zip it up, a five-minute ordeal during which we grunted and cursed at one another. My aunt had to custom-make my graduation gown, a huge white tent in which I resembled the Stay-Puft marshmallow man. Still, I left for college in New York City feeling relatively confident. After all, I wasn’t just fat. I was also stylish, managing to alter and combine pieces in a way where they overcame their origins as shapeless sacks designed by people with the gall to decorate plus-size garments with ice-cream cones and slices of pizza. And I was hilarious, *****y and sexually brash, defense mechanisms mastered by fat women and gay men everywhere.
I wasn’t immune — hurtful things would happen on occasion. Groups of rowdy teenagers sometimes yelled insults at me from car windows. I gave my phone number to a nice guy, only to find out when he called that he had a fetish for overweight women, shamelessly telling me that he likes “something to grab onto” during sex. Or someone would approach me out of nowhere on the street and tell me not to worry about how I look; someday — when I’m ready — I’ll lose the weight. And of course, I compared myself endlessly to the impossibly thin women in magazines, just like the average-weight women I knew, to whom I also, by the way, compared myself.
Despite these blows to your self-esteem, for the most part nobody close to you really tells you to your face what they think about your weight. As a result, a fat girl’s worldview is missing vital pieces of information. When you don’t get invited on your friends’ man-catching all-girl outings, or when men who enjoy sleeping with you over and over again fail to want to date you, you can’t quite comprehend that all this is really caused by the way you look.
But then, the summer before my junior year of college, something changed. I made a promise to myself to diet just for one summer, and for the first time I saw results. On a low-carb plan, I started melting away, shrinking inwards. I began to grow collarbones and hipbones, sprouting bony, sharp spots all over my body. By the end of the summer, I was 50 pounds lighter, and within a year I was down to 160 pounds on my 5’11″ frame, a solid size 10.
It’s been six years now that I’ve maintained that weight loss, and it is far and away the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. Not because I’m healthier and will probably live longer, but because I now reap the benefits of a society set up to punish fat people for the unforgivable crime of eating too much.
I hear the fat jokes right out loud now, instead of just a whispering breeze brushing past my ear. Men who used to let the door swing shut in my face now hold it open for me politely and look me up and down as I step past. My own boyfriend, a man I began dating a few months after reaching my goal weight, sees the picture on my driver’s license and admits he probably wouldn’t have gone out with me when I looked like that. I appreciate his honesty. It’s better than the good-intentioned people who gush upon seeing the new me, “You’re so pretty now!” before stammeringly adding, “Not that you weren’t, uh, pretty before.”
Finding yourself suddenly thin after a lifetime of being fat is a bit like stepping into that “Saturday Night Live” sketch where Eddie Murphy goes undercover as a white guy and discovers that white people act completely differently when there are no black people around. With no outward sign of my former body type, I became a renegade spy for Team F.A.T.
Of course, I didn’t discover that thin people drink cocktails and dance when fat people get off the bus. But when I lost weight, I was rewarded with membership in a club I never knew existed, where the benefits included better treatment, greater professional success and, above all, a new status as qualified participant in the social world including romantic relationships.
Of course, I lost weight to reap these benefits. But it doesn’t stop me from being angry that I had to lose weight to reap these benefits. Of those who are nice to me now, who would have been rude to me before? Which ones made the cruel jokes? Who can be trusted?
As the years pass, it is easy to forget. I have even, on a few occasions, found myself looking at an overweight person with faint disdain, forgetting those years I struggled with the very same issue. I hope never to gain back the weight I lost. But I have seen another side of people that I cannot forget. And with any luck, I never will.
I hope I always stay fat on the inside."




http://www.thefrisky.com/2010-08-09/girl-talk-i-lost-100-pounds-and-found-out-what-the-world-thinks-of-fat/
(there are pictures on the website)

most of this is my life and it is nicely written.

rehtaeh78

I LOVE this article. I have been trying to explain this phenomenon to my friends buy they don't understand. I too have started to experience men holding doors open for me and randomly greeting me. I get treated better. It makes me happy, sad and mad all at the same time.

^^This

TKmj5619

This is so true...thanks for sharing. I am an RN and have great reviews and comments..even being names as being in the top 10% on my yearly reviews...but, I find that I have to prove myself to my patients. I do not simply have their confidence as soon as I walk in their hosp room. I have to win them over; not that I am trying to. But, I see the transition in them, as I have spent my day with them. Sad...but it is one of my motivating factors...to simply walk in a room and have a person's confidence in me.

anitasongs

Bravo! I know that I will fight for the fat person once I do lose the weight.
It is unfair.. how people are prejudice
Stare at you in any environment and have no respect for an overweight person.
But as I have seen many people reap that kind of injustice ....if you can make fun of someone you are immature and you one day will have to learn the lesson of sensitivety, it is God's Way.
What goes around comes back around.
In one way or another.
So I tell people who stare I say grow up and be kind!
Anita

IHeartNewMe

"Bump"ing this to read!

hilarryus

This girl in a short ariticle has explained 100% everything that i am feeling. I cannot tell you home much this is true and how sad that it is. A mere 9 months ago i was 310lbs and whenever a guy would look at me or make a commet i alway thought it was a cruel joke. Now that i am 107 lbs lighter, i get hit on, people actually sit next to me on public transit and i am payed more attention too in a good way. When she says that she hopes to stay fat inside? I completely agree. Always remember where you come from!

dalgal26

Well said!

I see this everyday. People do treat you different when you are overweight. And yes, they do say those things and more behind your back.

What a cruel world it can be. :grumble:

I am so proud of you and I too, hope you stay 'fat' on the inside. I plan to! :happy:

Thanks for sharing!:flowerforyou:

EMagineBeingEMazing

bump

rachaelcousins

What I want to know is who has the damn right to shout things out of windows, sod them little minded people, just look out for yourself and the people who really matter x

chachita7

That was amazing...

Skinslover61

I couldn't agree more..have experienced many of those same reactions. I am making a conscious effort to NOT treat obese people the way I was treated. I am willing to share my success with any and all persons that want help...think I may have found my calling.... :happy:

Kissybiz

Great article and so true. I've lost 40 lbs and have just started getting positive attention instead of feeling invisible. I agree it's nice but annoying at the same time. A sad fact of life for the overweight woman.

brandi22479

I know what she means...
I lost 130 lbs through gastric bypass surgery and I completely understand everything she said.

janellag

bump

themommie

thanks for sharing

Georganna1962

Thank you for your story. I am sorry that people did not see your inner beauty before you lost weight. I am happy they are now treating you the way that you should have been treated all along. God created only one you. You are unique and valued. You are God's masterpiece - whether you weigh 100 pounds and 400 pounds. It never ceases to amaze me that people can be drug addics and alcoholics and the world just seems to accept this even after multiple times of them failing and going back to the drugs/alcohol - prime example Charlie Sheen - but someone who has a problem with food (might I point out a substance we cannot live without) is treated in unacceptable ways. Wake up people! Is our society really that shallow? Beauty comes from within the person and radiates outward.