"Lost 100lbs & found out what the world thinks of fat ppl"

TiasF

I'm going to be honest here. This article is very thought-provoking and I'm sympathetic to her experiences..... But what exactly is the author trying to achieve? Apologies or sympathy? Or is she trying to change the way society looks at people that are overweight or "obese?" While tearing someone down because you think you're better than them because they weigh more than you is wrong and superficial, I also don't think it's okay for individuals to be content with being extremely unhealthy. To me, that's like saying alcoholics shouldn't try to change their habits either. Everyone should just stay mum and never interfere when someone is eating themselves to death over the years? What kind of quality of life can you have when you're 100 lbs overweight and you have type 2 Diabetes? My parents have both been technically "obese" for 25+ years and they are 2 of the most amazing people I will ever know. My dad is honest about his responsibility but my mom tends to blame society and anyone other than herself. I have seen firsthand how their excessive weight has robbed them over the years of their health (mental and physical), their happiness, and many life experiences with our family. No one becomes obese or overweight overnight. It takes time and a serious amount of neglect of ourselves to get there. Let's not forget what MFP is about. A healthier life for ourselves by eating right and exercising. Simple. It's not a pity party. Who cares if someone talks behind your back about your weight? I've had that and a bunch of other faults talked about behind my back. There are always going to be people who tear you down in life but who cares? When you know who you are and you feel good about yourself, it's easier to let it roll off your back.

I think the author is trying to portray more of her experiences more than apologies or sympathy. I think it is nice to see some of the things on "the other side" & the writer expounds on that, hence the title. I think this pushes us to think about how we are treated, but the author's main goals are to really just explain her experiences. I think it is a motivation for many of us trying to lose weight, and she discusses a lot of issues we're facing & can relate to.

katielauren2001

But those with conditions contributing to weight gain should not be blamed... I eat far healthier than my skinnier peers So before people make assumptions based on appearance they should maybe consider other factors for weight gain rather than eating alot of bad foods. And it is a fault with society when young girls and boys are unhappy and wanting to diet because of what an ideal figure is portrayed as in the media, when they should be having a carefree childhood.

steelystan

Thanks for sharing - its a salutory story, however, dissapproval of obesity is not only the domain of the thin.

I am a fat man, there's no doubt about it, although I am getting thinner - I started out at 316lbs and have lost just over 24lbs in just less than 4 weeks. Its dropping off, largely due to the tools available to me on my ipad version of MFP. Yet, I have always looked at fat people and thought "Can't you see that you are too big?" - though of course, looking in the mirror and saying the same thing to myself at least stops me being a total hypocrite - and probably made me start looking after myself, although concern for health (sleep apneoia) pushed me to do something. I know that sounds a bit strange, but I think we are conditioned by the media and other pressures, like the workplace, to respect and aspire an often unrealistic ideal. One can't use that to excuse such an attitude, but perhaps merely to explain it, and of course, those private opinions can never be uttered about an individual. I once worked alongside another manager, a woman, who was very obese, but who was good looking, who dressed so stylishly, was so approachable and lovely, who was so good at her job and who was quite cheeky and sexy too, that the matter seemed almost trivial, putting aside the possible risk to her health. She told me she had a crush on me, but knew I didn't like big women. I ended up admitting to her that it was not so much that I didn't like big women, but that they reminded me of my own obesity and embarrassment followed.

What is more insidious than judging a big person's appearance, is assuming their character is diminished compared with thin people - thankfully something I don't believe I do. But I see it a lot of it at work, and I once had to fight tooth and nail with my boss to get a raise for one of my staff who was a big lady. She was among the most competent and hardworking of my team, but to him it didn't seem to count. I managed to get her the raise, but I later discovered that the boss in question was bigoted in other ways too, so maybe its all connected.

For good health, I'm glad to hear you have been so successful in achieving your aim to lose weight, and I hope I can emulate you - I will probably hear things expressed around me that I wouldn't as a fat man, just as you have, so it will be interesting. I should say though that even having admitted I gawp in fascination at bigger people, including my reflection, I am appalled by the stick-thin creatures that litter magazines and TV. If I don't stop losing weight at a reasonable point, (should I enjoy the luxury of getting to my target weight), and I continue on to Karl Lagerfeld territory, you have my permission to shoot me. (Sorry Karl - I suppose that thin-ist is it?)

em435

Thank you for sharing the article.

It will be fascinating to see the change as I approach my goal weight.

steelystan

I think a lot of it is overweight people like myself are just easy targets.

....I'm definitely a big target, ahem.

ALSinNYC

Here are a few more articles from a blogger that lost 135 ponds that speaks really beautifully about her life pre- and post- weight loss that have similarly inspired me (it is one post in three parts)-

http://www.canyoustayfordinner.com/what-i-miss-from-135lbs-ago/

http://www.canyoustayfordinner.com/2011/05/10/what-i-miss-from-135lbs-agopart-2/

http://www.canyoustayfordinner.com/2011/05/11/what-i-miss-from-135lbs-agopart-3/

heathybergy

i liked this article

binky610

"It’s been six years now that I’ve maintained that weight loss, and it is far and away the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. Not because I’m healthier and will probably live longer, but because I now reap the benefits of a society set up to punish fat people for the unforgivable crime of eating too much."

Although I tell people - and maybe myself - that I'm committed to weight loss because I want to be healthier, it's actually because I too want to reap the benefits of living in a society that punishes fat people. I want to feel normal & that's the ONLY reason I'm dieting like a mad woman & scheduled for bariatric surgery. I AM healthy at my over-weight but appearance - for me - really is everything. I was glad to see someone feels the same way.

MeliNichole84

amazing read. thanks so much for sharing.

Stacivogue

I really don't like all of these preachy posts about "you can lose weight, calories in calories out, it's simple, blah blah blah. It's not simple. It's not easy, or we would all do it. It's a hard journey every day. I grew up thin, and used to read magazines and feel bad for both myself and anyone that didnt' look like a model. I tried to be the prettiest I could be.

My mother and sister both had weight issues, it was a very negative thing to be fat in our house. But I was always relived that it didn't apply to me. I tried to eat healthy, exercise, and I was always neurotic about my weight. IN my 20's I wasnted to be 10 lbs lighter, same in college, same afterwards. I worked out like a maniac trying to lose weight - but didnt' fix my diet. I stayed the same. I had a really hard time losing weight in my 30's and then I had an injury in my foot where I thought I'd never walk again. I tried to do what I could but I ended up gaining about 20 lbs.

Finally, the pregancy. Oh, I was so sick and the only comfort I could have was food. I gained so much weight. I tipped the scales at 213 after he was born, and I felt horrible Suddenly, I realized how hard it is for obese people to go to the gym. It was one of he hardest things I've ever done. Dragging myself out to the gym was just not easy. The people at the gym were not very nice. I'd always been used to people helping me, or knowing me, but I was like invisible because of the weight. And one lady wanted to keep me out of spin class because I think she thought I would drop dead on the spot. I was so tired all of the time. I had no energy. And I was so depressed! I can see why people woulnd't want to fight back from that. I tried a bunch of diets, but none of them were practical or worked. I needed to workout as well to build body muscle back.

It gave me a new perspective on my mom and sister. I'd always judged them becuase they weren't as active as I was. But maybe they just didn't see how they could do what I do. I have been battling back to my old weight, but it's a hard road. I can see people treating me differntly at work. It's nice and makes me feel good. I missed the kindness..

steelystan

I really don't like all of these preachy posts about "you can lose weight, calories in calories out, it's simple, blah blah blah. It's not simple. It's not easy, or we would all do it.

I half agree. It is simple, but it is not necessarily easy.

If straight weight loss is the goal, with no particular health issues, it really is cals in/ cals out. But that conceals some subtleties because calories in and out can result from a range of things. That in itself is pretty tough if you don't differentiate across food groups, and get tempted to pursue a one dimensional diet, like "all fat is bad". Keeping your intake interesting and varied helps a lot, as does little things like NEVER eat in front of the TV -always at a table because your relationship with the meal makes a difference to how satisfying it is. By considering some of these issues, and following a pretty good exercise routine I am losing wieght very effectively , without any trouble with willpower - for me its been about not getting bored. Without wanting to make a mantra out of it, boredom means hunger, and hunger temps the sinful!

However, if you wish to be a certain shape or want to manage excess skin, increase muscle mass, can't exerise for some reason and so forth, it gets more complicated.

I've been trying ot figure a regime for my stepson who is enviably thin, but wants to put on about ten or twelve pounds. The problem for him is he is not a big eater, has an active job and likes the gym. I calciulated he needs about 4000 cals a day to put weight on, but it meant cutting down on gym, and so his weight gain might be too much fat - better if he could add some muscle mass too. So the food profile starts to get compicated and my head begins to hurt.

mogletdeluxe

Goodness me, I could have written than myself. Thank you for sharing it; it's been duly bookmarked.

The combination of emotions at this realisation is sometimes quite hard to deal with: pride, happiness, dismay, disappointment. All in a flash.

SheliaN1960

So sad, but so very true. And I can testify to that! Thanks for sharing~!

kimberly0416

Thanks for sharing, it is sad though.

vallemic

Soooo true!

sabina2012

YOu said it so eloquently... I hope you stay fat on the inside too!!!

Awkward30

What surprised me most is how people have reacted to and noticed my 30 pounds lost... I guess I had thought I was tricking people or that it wasn't so bad that people noticed... They did. Based on how many people have told me "you look hot now" it's safe to say I was not hot before. In fact, a guy I had met before weight loss (a few times) introduced himself to me as though we had never met and tried to hit on me. And honestly had no clue why I called him a douche. He just looked right through the fat girl.

karendsmith

It is so unfortunate that much of society puts someone "looks" first, whether you are over weight, not pretty,your teeth are crooked, you can't afford the latest fashion...etc... Many people do not take time to know the person on the inside, so that is sad, they are missing out on good people, good friends, etc. I totally understand this story you wrote, I am proud of the progress you have made personally for yourself, but people need to understand there are more to people than whats on the outside, the inside is where your heart and soul is...I have many great friends of all different sizes, colors, shapes, etc..and I love them all! But I do take time to look past the outward appearance and see what is on the inside..as they have done for me also! I wish you the best on your continued journey.

kali2785

Wow... This makes me very sad. I hope that I never forget the "fat" me..

yoovie

I gained 100 pounds after my car accident and found out how fat people look at skinny people.
I lost 90 of those pounds and found out what fat people think of fat people that lose weight.
I lost 90 of those pounds and found out what skinny people think of fat people.

my favorite demographic is fit people who love fit people no matter if tey just got fit or always were.

fat people and skinny people with their small minded hatefilled opinions PISS ME OFF.