hooking up on first date??

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Replies

  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member

    For some sex is an emotional experience, for others (myself included) sex is just something we do for pleasure. Like tennis.

    There is nothing pleasant about tennis.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    I meet my current BF online. We talked for weeks before actually meeting and we did have sex the first night we met. I would have done the same thing over again as I am the happiest person in the world with him.

    Sex to me is such an important part of a relationship that it's not WORTH waiting for. Why grow an emotional attachment to someone just to be let down when you find out you have no sexual compatibility...

    And I like how it was compared to tennis, :laugh: . That is exactly how I think of it.
  • Darkskinned88
    Darkskinned88 Posts: 1,177 Member
    hey all, just needed some advice from males and females about the above topic! if a guy try's to have sex on the first date what does it tell about him? is it that bad? and oh say the guy and the girl don't really know each-other, they just met online 4 weeks ago!

    i think its in the back of all men's minds to try but for the most part we don't we simply play the cards we're dealt. I wouldn't say if a girl does it makes her easy, however it shows a vulnerability; that he already can do what he wants in spite of her own better judgement, a road you don't want to take. Personally i have gone all the way twice on a first date, one time it turned into a (admittedly one sided) relationship, the other never turned into anything but sex.
  • _binary_jester_
    _binary_jester_ Posts: 2,132 Member

    For some sex is an emotional experience, for others (myself included) sex is just something we do for pleasure. Like tennis.

    There is nothing pleasant about tennis.
    Totally not true. When the racket slips out of your hand and it hits the person in the court next to you...that is quite amusing.
  • Darkskinned88
    Darkskinned88 Posts: 1,177 Member
    If you want a relationship with this guy then don't give him everything on the first date!

    Agree i find when you give it all up the first night what is there to look forward too. Unless he sees his life with you that fast he will move on and you got played.

    not if its good, a man will not just throw away good sex we will recycle and reuse #gogreen lol
  • forgtmenot
    forgtmenot Posts: 860 Member
    Most guys will have sex on the first date if you let them. That's just a man for you IMO... My boyfriend and knew each other before we started dating (although not very well) and he tried to have sex with me on the first date. I just told him that I like him too much to ruin everything having sex too soon. Almost 3 years later and we are still together. So, I don't think it says anything about the guy other than that he is attracted to you. I think if you want more than a one night stand though it is important to wait, because no matter what he tells you, he won't think of you the same if you give it up too soon.
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    go out with him and have fun. if that fun ends in sex, then that's ok. if it doesn't, that's ok too. i would pay more attention to how he treats the waitress, then that he wants to have sex. that he wants to have sex is a given, it's not a sign of anything. how he treats the waitress/ the hostess/ the cab driver/ the cashier is a better sign of what kind of man he is.

    you'll both be thinking of sex. that's part of dating. part of living. pay attention to the other stuff.
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,275 Member
    No doubt I mean more likely than not he's already undressed and had his way with you a few times in his mind before you even met. Now he's looking to fill in a few blanks. There, feel better now?

    I remember passing up a first date hookup because of the stereotypes associated.....didn't make the same mistake on the 2nd date
  • Melissa_2305
    Melissa_2305 Posts: 76 Member
    The quote about tennis is from 'Friends with benefits' isn't it XD?
  • i_am_losing_it
    i_am_losing_it Posts: 310 Member
    The first date my husband and I had there was entirely too much heat in the room if you know what I mean and we had a small kiss and then I told him why don't we go somewhere and _ _ _ _. I know totally tacky! We laugh about it still 20 years later. This was not a habit for either of us it just was pure passion right from the get-go and still continues today.

    Our older kids are always embarrassed that we are always kissing and hugging and flirting with each other. Our younger kids and when the big ones were young are always saying things like aww you guys love each other. :)
    If it feels right, sometimes it is.
  • xo_morgan
    xo_morgan Posts: 298
    If you want a relationship with this guy then don't give him everything on the first date!

    Agree i find when you give it all up the first night what is there to look forward too. Unless he sees his life with you that fast he will move on and you got played.

    not if its good, a man will not just throw away good sex we will recycle and reuse #gogreen lol



    lmao @ #gogreen.:laugh:
  • JennaM222
    JennaM222 Posts: 1,996 Member
    I have on the first date and he turned out to be a very reliable, fun booty call and friend :)
  • _binary_jester_
    _binary_jester_ Posts: 2,132 Member
    Most guys will have sex on the first date if you let them. That's just a man for you IMO... My boyfriend and knew each other before we started dating (although not very well) and he tried to have sex with me on the first date. I just told him that I like him too much to ruin everything having sex too soon. Almost 3 years later and we are still together. So, I don't think it says anything about the guy other than that he is attracted to you. I think if you want more than a one night stand though it is important to wait, because no matter what he tells you, he won't think of you the same if you give it up too soon.
    Thank you for lumping us all together. How about I return the favor and state all women's views on sex are totally misguided and outdated?

    I, as a male (last time I checked), think that the connection is more important. I find people funny who think using sex as a carrot leading into a more meaningful relationship works. The relationship will work regardless when you chooses to bump uglies.

    But it does make a convenient excuse is you sleep with him, then it doesn't work out, blaming giving it up too soon, when it was probable you, not the timing.
  • JennaM222
    JennaM222 Posts: 1,996 Member
    Guys NOT wanting sex on the first date only happens in movies...and Hallmark cards.

    Not True!

    My BF now of 2 years wouldnt sleep with me fore like 2 months! I tried and tried, and finally he gave in. When a guy is interested in a girl for long term, he won't want to sleep with her quickly. Well, he will want to, but he won't.
  • skinnywithin
    skinnywithin Posts: 1,392 Member
    I dont think it matters, it all depends on the person and if they are mature enought to handle the fact that this may just be a bootay call and if so and you are willing ..I say go for it. sometimes two people just click and it works , LOOK just do what ever makes you feel good and Stop asking for what others think. is right or wrong !
  • TinkrBelz
    TinkrBelz Posts: 866 Member
    hey all, just needed some advice from males and females about the above topic! if a guy try's to have sex on the first date what does it tell about him? is it that bad? and oh say the guy and the girl don't really know each-other, they just met online 4 weeks ago!

    I'm going to let you in on a little secret. If he's trying to have sex on the first date................ That means he's a guy.

    He'll try to have sex without a date, on the first date, on the second date, third date, etc etc etc.

    I think that this is probably right on target. But, I am old fashion and would NEVER do this. haha...Ok, yes, I have been married for almost 22 years and been with him for 24 years...so my advice might suck!!

    But, I just know that I would not feel right about myself if I did have sex on the first date. I would not think badly of a guy for trying it on the first date because he is a guy. But, I would make him work harder for the goods. I would have to make sure he is worth it. But again, I am little old fashion...so those days might be far gone!! ;)
  • Darkskinned88
    Darkskinned88 Posts: 1,177 Member
    Most guys will have sex on the first date if you let them. That's just a man for you IMO... My boyfriend and knew each other before we started dating (although not very well) and he tried to have sex with me on the first date. I just told him that I like him too much to ruin everything having sex too soon. Almost 3 years later and we are still together. So, I don't think it says anything about the guy other than that he is attracted to you. I think if you want more than a one night stand though it is important to wait, because no matter what he tells you, he won't think of you the same if you give it up too soon.
    Thank you for lumping us all together. How about I return the favor and state all women's views on sex are totally misguided and outdated?

    I, as a male (last time I checked), think that the connection is more important. I find people funny who think using sex as a carrot leading into a more meaningful relationship works. The relationship will work regardless when you chooses to bump uglies.

    EXACTLY....whether i wait 3 hrs, 3 weeks, 3 months if the connection is not there swapping scents in the bedroom is not going to change that.
  • ThePhoenixRose
    ThePhoenixRose Posts: 1,978 Member
    I've done it. I've not done it. Both ended up in long term relationships. I've had a few 1 night stands, but those weren't dates by any means. I went in looking to get laid, found a willing participant, and we both had fun.

    Just go with the flow and be prepared for anything. if it feels right, do it, but don't make a decision based on what you think others will think.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Guys NOT wanting sex on the first date only happens in movies...and Hallmark cards.

    Not True!

    My BF now of 2 years wouldnt sleep with me fore like 2 months! I tried and tried, and finally he gave in. When a guy is interested in a girl for long term, he won't want to sleep with her quickly. Well, he will want to, but he won't.

    So I've imagined the last seven years living with my boyfriend, then? I imagined him calling me every night the first week after we slept together (the second time we met) and talking for hours, then calling me every morning on his way to work? I imagined him begging me to join him and his friends on a weekend vacation the following week? I imagined him driving hours out of our way to introduce me to his mom and stepdad a month after we met?

    I wonder how he'd treat a woman he was actually interested in ...
  • _binary_jester_
    _binary_jester_ Posts: 2,132 Member
    Guys NOT wanting sex on the first date only happens in movies...and Hallmark cards.

    Not True!

    My BF now of 2 years wouldnt sleep with me fore like 2 months! I tried and tried, and finally he gave in. When a guy is interested in a girl for long term, he won't want to sleep with her quickly. Well, he will want to, but he won't.
    Bah Jenna...you know I am mostly joking. It is a rare guy, but they do exist like snipes and jackalopes.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    HEY YOU PEOPLE!!! WOMEN THINK ABOUT SEX TOO. DID YOU KNOW THAT?! I mean really, this whole, "men think about sex a lot." thing is a load of bullsh!t... it's not just men. And the idea that women should hold their vaginas hostage to some kind of emotional connection or monetary reimbursement is disgusting. We all have sex organs, everyone should practice using them, get good at using them, and enjoy them. REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT IT'S AN INNIE OR AN OUTIE.
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
    Personally....if you need a "hook-up" it's your choice. In my opinion, it's rude and disrespectful to expect it. If it happens, and wasn't on the menu...rock the bus!
  • MelissaL582
    MelissaL582 Posts: 1,422 Member
    Guys NOT wanting sex on the first date only happens in movies...and Hallmark cards.
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,275 Member
    HEY YOU PEOPLE!!! WOMEN THINK ABOUT SEX TOO. DID YOU KNOW THAT?! I mean really, this whole, "men think about sex a lot." thing is a load of bullsh!t... it's not just men. And the idea that women should hold their vaginas hostage to some kind of emotional connection or monetary reimbursement is disgusting. We all have sex organs, everyone should practice using them, get good at using them, and enjoy them. REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT IT'S AN INNIE OR AN OUTIE.
    You just became my hero LOL
    Friend request sent \m/
  • ElleOQuent
    ElleOQuent Posts: 429 Member
    HEY YOU PEOPLE!!! WOMEN THINK ABOUT SEX TOO. DID YOU KNOW THAT?! I mean really, this whole, "men think about sex a lot." thing is a load of bullsh!t... it's not just men. And the idea that women should hold their vaginas hostage to some kind of emotional connection or monetary reimbursement is disgusting. We all have sex organs, everyone should practice using them, get good at using them, and enjoy them. REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT IT'S AN INNIE OR AN OUTIE.

    Let's bang.
  • Pocket_Pixi
    Pocket_Pixi Posts: 1,167 Member
    HEY YOU PEOPLE!!! WOMEN THINK ABOUT SEX TOO. DID YOU KNOW THAT?! I mean really, this whole, "men think about sex a lot." thing is a load of bullsh!t... it's not just men. And the idea that women should hold their vaginas hostage to some kind of emotional connection or monetary reimbursement is disgusting. We all have sex organs, everyone should practice using them, get good at using them, and enjoy them. REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT IT'S AN INNIE OR AN OUTIE.


    :flowerforyou: I have actually been told I think about sex more than most of my guy friends...
  • ThePhoenixRose
    ThePhoenixRose Posts: 1,978 Member
    HEY YOU PEOPLE!!! WOMEN THINK ABOUT SEX TOO. DID YOU KNOW THAT?! I mean really, this whole, "men think about sex a lot." thing is a load of bullsh!t... it's not just men. And the idea that women should hold their vaginas hostage to some kind of emotional connection or monetary reimbursement is disgusting. We all have sex organs, everyone should practice using them, get good at using them, and enjoy them. REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT IT'S AN INNIE OR AN OUTIE.

    i :heart: you sooooo much right now!
  • adrian_indy
    adrian_indy Posts: 1,444 Member
    If he tries for sex on the first date, no big deal. If he tried for anal, that's just rude. Anal should be reserved for the 3rd date.
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    HEY YOU PEOPLE!!! WOMEN THINK ABOUT SEX TOO. DID YOU KNOW THAT?! I mean really, this whole, "men think about sex a lot." thing is a load of bullsh!t... it's not just men. And the idea that women should hold their vaginas hostage to some kind of emotional connection or monetary reimbursement is disgusting. We all have sex organs, everyone should practice using them, get good at using them, and enjoy them. REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT IT'S AN INNIE OR AN OUTIE.

    this is why i love you.
  • IndigoVA
    IndigoVA Posts: 164 Member
    My husband and I hooked up on our first date (fully mutual decision), and we've been together for 11 years now.
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