Why don't I get hit on?

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Replies

  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    I think you are gorgeous. :flowerforyou:
  • albinogorilla
    albinogorilla Posts: 1,056 Member
    you are tall, us short fellas are way intimidated by girls taller than us..........all other factors aside.
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    I'd hit it Cory!... just wanted to throw that out there. :wink:
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
    Are you open? Do you smile when you enter a room? Look straight ahead and at guys' eyes?

    Supposedly, I'm cute here on MFP.. but in real life I didn't get hit on as much as I do here on MFP.

    BUT I've changed some things about myself and have noticed a difference. Here on MFP I'm open and confident. It shows through my posts.

    In real life, I'm definately confident now but was having trouble showing it. Now that I'm really secure with myself and my self esteem has went up, I didn't know how to go from being in the background to making myself a show stopper instead. :bigsmile: I'm not the hottest girl at all but when I go out, I smile as soon as I enter the room at everybody. I look up when I'm walking. I stick my *kitten* out and walk with a sway in my hips. I play with my hair. I size attractive guys up and down and smile at them. I look into their eyes when I talk to them and smile. (smiling seems to be a good thing with guys)

    All these little things have made a great impact and now I will have guys come up to me to talk.. not just notice me from afar.

    Some guys might be intimidated but I think the looking approachable thing can change some of that.

    This might be a fake it till you make it thing, according to you since you said you have low self esteem. Just know you're beautiful, BELIEVE IT!
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    you are tall, us short fellas are way intimidated by girls taller than us..........all other factors aside.
    Funny thing - my ex is 4 1/2" shorter than me... not all short men are intimidated by tall women.
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    I'd hit it Cory!... just wanted to throw that out there. :wink:
    Between you and _snw_, I've almost had to rethink my whole "I'm totally straight" thing...
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    If it's any consolation, I get hit on by smelly, toothless sweaty truckers. I never been hit on outside of work... and I think that's because I'm the only female here. LOL
  • albinogorilla
    albinogorilla Posts: 1,056 Member
    you are tall, us short fellas are way intimidated by girls taller than us..........all other factors aside.
    Funny thing - my ex is 4 1/2" shorter than me... not all short men are intimidated by tall women.

    not all, but most.........just for the approachability factor......... cold call wise..........an out of the blue approach with a guy who is shorter approaching a girl who is taller..........that is unusual.....and this is from a shorter fella.
  • Larry0445
    Larry0445 Posts: 204 Member
    If i were 40 yrs,younger,I would surely hit on you... ;-)
  • mslack01
    mslack01 Posts: 823 Member
    Do you have a smile on your face in real life and do you make eye contact? I am hardly the prettiest girl in the room but even now that I am married and older, men flirt with me a lot. They even do it in front of my husband. And like I said, I'm certainly not the prettiest girl in the room. But I have had them tell me it is because I am always friendly and smiling. When I was younger and in my twenties and wanted to meet someone I would usually just try to make eye contact and a lot of times they would come over and introduce themselves. You'd be surprised at how the smallest gestures are what cause men to take a second look.
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    I'd hit it Cory!... just wanted to throw that out there. :wink:
    Between you and _snw_, I've almost had to rethink my whole "I'm totally straight" thing...

    w00t!

    I'm only 5 ft tall.. I hope that's not a problem. :tongue:
  • legmotor
    legmotor Posts: 197 Member
    It certainly looks like you are willing to "bend over backwards" so that is an awesome characteristic to have. = )

    I'm really dumb when it comes to knowing if I am being hit on. I either don't notice it or I think they are just being nice. I was for a long time so paralyzed by rejection that I wouldn't even ask someone out unless I was absolutely positive that she would say yes. Heck I wouldn't even dare speak to someone I didn't already know or was introduced to.

    Be confident, it is sexy and that will automatically get you noticed. = )
  • SyntonicGarden
    SyntonicGarden Posts: 944 Member
    I've found it to be attitude and how you carry yourself. If you've ever been in the first few weeks of a relationship, you'll notice that all of a sudden, guys seem to come out of the woodwork. That's probably because you have a spring in your step, are confident, and happy. People are probably going to be more attracted to that.

    If it's ok to share this, it's a neat article on how happiness is attractive. :)

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/shawn-achor/pursuit-of-happiness_b_904740.html
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    I don't either. I know that my weight being up makes me feel like I don't want to be approached even though sometimes i do, so I'm sure it spills over and people unconsciously pick up on it.

    I don't understand it in your case though, you're very pretty.
  • _snw_
    _snw_ Posts: 1,298 Member
    i haven't read any of the responses my dear cory. but. sometimes if your self esteem is low, it gives off a vibe. you may not make eye contact. you may not act flirty. you may not be forward. and sometimes, just sometimes, that's why the boys will outwardly hit on a girl.

    maybe?


    you're hot though. i'll hit on you when i get there.k?
  • lickmybaconcakes
    lickmybaconcakes Posts: 1,063 Member
    300.jpg
    Still hasnt worked like the adverts :grumble: ...
    but maybe they have a womens one?
  • Toddrific
    Toddrific Posts: 1,114 Member
    There is a book I perused recently called...Do gentlemen really prefer blondes by jena pincott
    it has the science behind mating and attraction.

    One of the key things was eye contact. If a guy looks at you and you look down or away supposedly
    it signals disinterest or something.

    Book has lots of fun blurbs in it.
  • bigredhearts
    bigredhearts Posts: 428
    i never get hit on in bars... yet all my friends do (and believe me when i say i AM NOT the ugly friend) so i feel your pain. i was told its a vibe i give off and was told i get checked out all the time but i just dont notice (the hubs told me this one)
  • Karalopolous
    Karalopolous Posts: 574
    This is probably going to sound really conceited, but I get hit on pretty frequently. I don't think I'm a supermodel or anything, but I think it's because I carry myself with a lot of confidence, usually have a smile on my face, and I think men (and people in general) are drawn to that. Women often strike up conversations with me as well.

    I had this friend who was SUPER cute, great figure, really good looking all around, but she almost NEVER got approached by men. Why? It was 100% her attitude. I kinda observed her once when I saw her at the store but she hadn't seen me yet, and I realized that she was just totally unapproachable even though she was very attractive. Her resting face said to me "I'm a b!tch, don't even try talking to me" and she just didn't carry herself in a way that made her open to a stranger talking to her.

    Now, I'm NOT saying that's the situation with you, because obviously I don't know you in real life, but I think the way we carry ourselves and present ourselves in public is like 95% responsible for who approaches us and how often it happens. Strangely enough, once I stopped hanging out with that particular friend (turns out, she actually was a b!tch), I noticed SO much more attention from people in general. A man hitting on me, a woman complimenting my outfit, just like night and day, because I think her attitude rubbed off on me when we were friends.


    It's almost impossible to say what you just said without it sounding conceited....but I know that it isn't being said that way, bc I totally agree with you. I smile alot, I talk alot, I am bubbly and happy and I get hit on. Cory, you are really strong, you are probably very intimidating to guys who are like "damn, I can't talk to her". Guys are looking though, I have seen guys check out all kinds of girls (Im not saying you are ugly) so it's probably you aren't noticing. Get yourself a good pair of heels (or equally awesome shoes of your style) and rock your confidence. COnfidence goes soooo much futher than we know!
  • kekl
    kekl Posts: 382 Member
    It's all in attitude I think! When I am happy, open, smiling, etc I get hit on all the time but when I am in an angry mood I definately give off this 'don't mess with me' vibe and everyone leaves me alone.

    Use it to your advantage when you want people to leave you alone! lol
  • flea2449
    flea2449 Posts: 499 Member
    You are very beautiful!

    I have the same problem too! Not the beautiful part......the "guys don't hit on me part"! :(
  • BeautyFromPain
    BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
    noone hits on me either, its ok
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    i haven't read any of the responses my dear cory. but. sometimes if your self esteem is low, it gives off a vibe. you may not make eye contact. you may not act flirty. you may not be forward. and sometimes, just sometimes, that's why the boys will outwardly hit on a girl.

    maybe?


    you're hot though. i'll hit on you when i get there.k?
    Yes, please. :)
  • Saffyra
    Saffyra Posts: 607 Member
    Well, I had an experience that made me smile.

    I was walking past a guy in the gym who was totally interested in his phone. He had just come in the door that I was about to leave through. I expected him to look up at me as I walked by but was disappointed when he didn't. (hey, im proud of my weight loss and I want to know people notice!)

    In any case, I watched his reflection in the glass as I opened the door and TOTALLY saw him check me out, he completely turned around to look at me!

    So, guys try to be sneaky about it but you *can* catch them sometimes :D Maybe you just aren't seeing it.
  • Hawksbillus
    Hawksbillus Posts: 128 Member
    I would so hit on you, but then my wife would kill me in my sleep. She's got these crazy "rules". :)
  • newcomer9
    newcomer9 Posts: 38 Member
    ur just so sexy they dont think they have a chance, just like when a guy doent text u back for a while, they were just sso happy u texted that they fainted!!! so just keep singing the song in ur head saying i'm sexy and i know it!!! and some guy will just sweep u away. cuz u will be the most amazing thing in someones eye. even if its not now.
  • xHelloQuincyx
    xHelloQuincyx Posts: 884 Member
    who says guys have to be the ones to hit on you.

    get out there and find what you likkkkke girl.
  • Karalopolous
    Karalopolous Posts: 574
    Also, I've got to ask the question, ppl are hitting on you here? lol, I guess my MFP is scary then, bc that isn't happening to me, haha.
  • ScottyNoHotty
    ScottyNoHotty Posts: 1,957 Member
    UHHH...some guys have low self esteem also...
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    i've always wondered this about myself. as much as i want to change about myself, i think i look pretty good when i decide to dress up and go out. i always figure it's cause im with my boyfriend but there's been a few times where i've been out alone or with girlfriends or when i'm going to the bathroom or waiting somewhere alone...and i still get nothing! >=(

    Actually I used to get hit on WAY WAY more when I was out with a boyfriend or a date. Do men want you more when you're not available?
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