Women who don't accept male friend requests

asia_hanebach
asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
in Motivation and Support
So I've seen this many many times, where a girl has it written on her profile that she doesn't accept friend requests from males. I'm just wondering if any of these girls could explain the reasoning behind this?

I've personally only ever had the guys of mpf be super nice and polite, and haven't seen any sort of harassment that's sometimes encountered on other online communities. The guys are here for the same reasons that we're here, right? So is it to avoid harassment?

Is it for the same reasons that some girls don't feel comfortable working out in front of guys (a self-conscious sort of thing)? Is it so that you can post before/after pictures with less clothing than you would if guys you don't really know can see them?

I don't know, I'm just trying to understand what the reasoning for this is. Any ideas??
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Replies

  • sevencallmemom
    sevencallmemom Posts: 505 Member
    I have guy friends, but I wonder if sometimes ladies don't accept requests from guys out of respect for their relationship? If my hubby was uncomfortable with my guy friends they'd be deleted. I'm glad he doesn't mind since they're all pretty awesome. :)
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    Oh that does make sense lol. I hadn't even thought of that. I'm not in a relationship, so I guess that's why the thought hadn't occured to me.
  • chachadiva150
    chachadiva150 Posts: 453 Member
    Maybe they only want female friends. Isn't that reason enough?
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    Maybe they only want female friends. Isn't that reason enough?

    I guess, but enough to go out of their way to specify that male friend requests won't be accepted? I just don't understand why. It's mind boggling to me. What's wrong with male friends?
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    Maybe they only want female friends. Isn't that reason enough?

    I guess, but enough to go out of their way to specify that male friend requests won't be accepted? I just don't understand why. It's mind boggling to me. What's wrong with male friends?
    boys have cooties?
  • Blessedmommy_2x
    Blessedmommy_2x Posts: 419 Member
    Out of respect for my husband - although he wouldn't mind & also because I really just want female friends.

    I agree I have only ever seen respectful and motivated men on here, it is nothing against them... just something I choose to do. Maybe I will change my mind in the future, but for now, women only.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,416 Member

    boys have cooties?

    and they sweat.
  • SergeantSunshine_reused
    SergeantSunshine_reused Posts: 5,382 Member
    I have some really bad personal messages sent to me. I block them immediately, but hard to have too many guy friends after that. I wont put up with it.
  • ForeverIrish
    ForeverIrish Posts: 227 Member
    I'm happy to have any friends...animal, vegetable or mineral. Bring them on! I'm new and really like the community.
  • quererespoder
    quererespoder Posts: 40 Member
    well in my case its not specified on my profile but i accept only guys that are about my age , up to about 26. i have a lot of older guys (40+) add me and i usually deny , its nothing personal but i do have like bikini pics on my profile and i would just feel uncomfortable about having older men on there while i post these things. it feels like my dad seeing them lol. so thats my reason... if someone got offended sorry but you asked opinions...
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    I'm happy to have any friends...animal, vegetable or mineral. Bring them on! I'm new and really like the community.

    Haha! I love this!! Feel free to add me if you're looking for more friends! :)
  • kmozymoz
    kmozymoz Posts: 187
    I accept requests from both, but some women might feel really uncomfortable about men knowing what they eat or looking at pictures of them if they're not at their ideal weight or whatnot. That's just a guess, I could be wrong. Or they've had too many men try to flirt with them perhaps?
  • fittiephd
    fittiephd Posts: 608 Member
    I don't have it on my profile but I think I only have one male friend. At first I really only felt comfortable having female support, but now that I've gotten a few random messages from male users with compliments that, hopefully are good natured and not meant to be sexual, but I don't want them to get out of hand. If a male adds me and has a message in the add request AND is similar in age to me, then I usually add them and give them a "trial period". I really only keep friends of any sex around if they are supportive, and active mfp users. So, same goes for males!

    Guess i'm just more careful about male users even though they haven't given me much reason to feel this way. Sorry guys :/
  • xXKatrinaXx
    xXKatrinaXx Posts: 234
    Out of respect for my husband - although he wouldn't mind & also because I really just want female friends.

    exactly!! and yes i think its wierd when i get requests from men who ONLY (or the very LARGE majority) of friends on their lists are females.

    once i did have had a creep (male) REPEATEDLY send me a friend request. i kept declining and he kept sending over and over again. at least 5 times.
  • TOYGRRRL
    TOYGRRRL Posts: 251 Member
    I don't mind. Hubby doesn't mind. But all it takes is one off hand creepo comment or no reciprocal support and they are gone. Come to think of it that goes for the same sex too. That is all.
  • mamitosami
    mamitosami Posts: 531 Member
    Maybe they only want female friends. Isn't that reason enough?

    I guess, but enough to go out of their way to specify that male friend requests won't be accepted? I just don't understand why. It's mind boggling to me. What's wrong with male friends?
    boys have cooties?

    Haha!! This made me laugh out loud!! Seriously though, there has been talk of harassment on here and I think it puts some women off for good. I can understand that, I have zero tolerance for it. Having said that, some of my best friends on here and my favourite sources of information, and my biggest cheerleaders are the male friends on here... I've been treated with nothing but respect on here by the guys... and the girls aren't so bad either :laugh:
  • IronmanPanda
    IronmanPanda Posts: 2,083 Member
    Maybe they only want female friends. Isn't that reason enough?

    I guess, but enough to go out of their way to specify that male friend requests won't be accepted? I just don't understand why. It's mind boggling to me. What's wrong with male friends?
    boys have cooties?

    Not me. I have herpes.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    well in my case its not specified on my profile but i accept only guys that are about my age , up to about 26. i have a lot of older guys (40+) add me and i usually deny , its nothing personal but i do have like bikini pics on my profile and i would just feel uncomfortable about having older men on there while i post these things. it feels like my dad seeing them lol. so thats my reason... if someone got offended sorry but you asked opinions...

    No, that's a perfectly reasonable and valid reason. I've just seen it specifed on people's profiles so many times that I was wondering if there actually was a lot of harassment or something that people were getting.
  • CalJur
    CalJur Posts: 627 Member
    simple, they prefer females only on this journey. period. it is their right. enough said.
  • candyrayne215
    candyrayne215 Posts: 47 Member
    im new here and will like all the friends i can get... gotta lose this weight!
    Good luck
  • iwantniceabs
    iwantniceabs Posts: 357 Member
    I have lots of great guy friends on MFP. BUT, I remember when I first got on here, my first set of friends were females - I think I was just trying to keep myself honest - just like how I suck my gut in when I'm around my guy friends, but don't even think about that stuff when I'm hanging out with my girls. I was thinking that if I was friends with guys, I wouldn't want to log all the cookies I stuffed my face with or anything that was unattractive. I guess I just realized that I don't see any of these people in real life, so what's the harm in letting these guys know how unattractive I can be at times? :) I'm sure women that only friend women have lots of different reasons.
  • oliviaseward
    oliviaseward Posts: 66 Member
    i have a couple of guy friends on here but i have had other guys that ive accepted send me not so approriate messages like asking for boob shots -_- im not on this site so you can hit on me. i automatically will decline anyone who doesnt send me a message. its the first line on my profile. women who add me send a message and that makes me know that they read my profile. most guys, not all but most dont send me a message and i know that they arent interested in being "awesome lets help each other out " fitness friends because they didnt even take the time to read my profile.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    Guess i'm just more careful about male users even though they haven't given me much reason to feel this way. Sorry guys :/

    It's understandable considering you can never actlly be sure of who you're talking to when you're part of an online community
  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
    Because they can. Who cares?
  • marynificent
    marynificent Posts: 110 Member
    Because I don't want to think twice if i ***** about gaining weight from my period, that i have been farting all day, or if i want to post a picture of my big ol boobs in a bikini. I didn't even friend my husband. HA.
  • slowturtle1
    slowturtle1 Posts: 284 Member
    I'm happy to have any friends...animal, vegetable or mineral. Bring them on! I'm new and really like the community.

    ^That made me laugh. :laugh:
    I think I understand why some women wouldn't want male friends, I'm just not one of them. I never considered excluding anyone, but my husband did notice me responding to a post one night and said, "Who's Larry!?" I had to laugh because we've been married almost 7 years and only now (that I'm beginning to lose some weight) has my husband started to show even a hint of jealousy. I asked him if it bothered him that I have male friends on MFP and he said he really didn't care, he just hadn't thought about it until he saw I was responding to a guy. As long as the guy is not out of line, and he gives me constructive feedback/advice, I'm happy to have as a friend.
  • JenAiMarres
    JenAiMarres Posts: 743 Member
    I dont have guy friends...If I did I couldn't talk about my constipation issues constantly!! Lmao!!! Just kidding...sorta!
  • JoniBologna
    JoniBologna Posts: 653 Member
    I have one guy friend on MFP. He is pretty down to earth. I have had others, but I deleted them. There were a couple who were too flirty (I'm in a relationship). Also, I do a fair amount of *****ing about my period, so I guess I don't want to subject them to it. I don't have an absolute ban on male friends, but generally, I'm more comfortable talking about weight and body image stuff with women.
  • takehimaway
    takehimaway Posts: 499 Member
    As someone who is gender variant, but assigned female at birth, living as male, it puts me off from making female friends that are like, "OMFG, NO BOYS ALLOWED." Neither of the people I'm in a relationship with tell me who I can or cannot talk to, unless someone is dangerous, be it abusive ex-lovers, serial killers, ad infinitum; now would I ever waste my time or energy with someone who did so. I'm a grown adult; I make the choices of who I can and can't talk to. I have no problem adding anyone who wants/needs support; we are all here for the same thing.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    Some women just want the freedom of being able to say things they (falsely) believe would gross us out - we know you poop, fart and all the stuff ya know. Others do it out of respect for their partners, and others still just do it 'because'. It's no big deal really and I don't think most of us take offence to rejections on those grounds.

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