Women who don't accept male friend requests

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Replies

  • StarvingDiva
    StarvingDiva Posts: 1,107 Member
    I don't get this, "out of respect for my husband/boyfriend" this is a fitness site not a dating site...

    I'm not sure I get that either. No boys want to be my friend. Boo hoo!

    Personally I don't care, we are all here to make lifestyle changes and I can use all the support I can get. I don't talk about my period at all on here, well only once a month. *wink*

    I'm pretty sure men know women get their periods every month and I'm pretty sure they don't care unless you become a raging lunatic and they are in your direct path. Then they care.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    you know what I"m wondering? Why it matters? Is this really an entire thread dedicated to people having to explain themselves on an issue that doesn't even affect you, as you're not male? yes it is. mind boggling.

    As someone whose closest friends are all male, I was just curious why people would go out of their way to avoid male friendships. Not that I need to be "explaining myself on an issue that doesn't even affect you"
  • Mizzou91
    Mizzou91 Posts: 249
    Who each person does and does not choose to accept is their own personal choice and I completely understand and respect that. I do have a question for those of you who won't add men because some of them out there are creepy (which is VERY true). Why do you judge our entire gender by the lowest common denominator? I don't assume all women are *****y just because I've met some who are.

    Also, for those who automatically reject those of us who have primarily female friend lists....umm....MFP is very female dominated. I bet that women outnumber men on here by at least 5-1 so it's kind of unavoidable to have a predominantly female friend list.
  • carrietehbear
    carrietehbear Posts: 384 Member
    I don't have it posted on my profile but I only accept friend requests from females. IRL, my closest friends are guys and I love them to pieces. However, I just feel during this journey I need more support from other females. Girls have said really hurtful things to me growing up and made fun of me a lot for my weight; so, I find it to be healing to surround myself with other women on the same journey who can cheer me on!
  • Trail_Addict
    Trail_Addict Posts: 1,340 Member

    I'm pretty sure men know women get their periods every month...

    WHAT?!?! MONTHLY, YOU SAY?

    I figured it had to be a new thing, judging by the daily threads about TOM. :tongue:
  • amandanzgirl
    amandanzgirl Posts: 79 Member
    I don't have any male friends here on MFP.

    I have only ever had friend requests from guys when I changed my profile pic to a Victoria's Secret Swimsuit model (inspiration for me). I swear to god, I had like 6 requests from males, within the hour lol.

    That aside, I share a lot of 'girls' issues/ problems, which somehow end up being related to my weightloss. I'm not sure a guy would be interested in hearing half of that stuff anyway!
  • tinana_RN
    tinana_RN Posts: 541 Member
    I get the "no boys allowed" part, but why have an album full of pics of your chest? Are you tracking progress in your bra size? Who are these pics for, especially if you're being gender-specific due to a BF/ Husband? I always found that one odd.


    :laugh:
  • MADDIESMOMMY6611
    MADDIESMOMMY6611 Posts: 140 Member
    I don't get this, "out of respect for my husband/boyfriend" this is a fitness site not a dating site...



    For real. My husband doesn't care who I talk to on here.

    Yeah but some women put bikini pictures and what not in their profiles and don't want other men to see out of respect. I'm not saying I'm one of them but I can understand that.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    Hi there,
    I only ever accept people that I personally know... but I don't feel the need to write that all over my page stating this fact.
    Personally if I did accept MFP friends whom I did not know prior I still wouldn't add men... I would most probably add or accept friends who had similarities to me i.e. similiar weight, similiar eating habits, similiar active liftstyle. I don't think I'd have as much in common with friends or men as they would/could have completely different goals. I have always been a super protective person too and I do have a boyfriend already... so I don't want to put anyone in an uncomfortable situation. Stick with people that I know is safest! :smile:

    I guess it does help you to stay on track when you have friends that are in a similar place with similar goals. That's a very valid reason :)
  • jenbusick
    jenbusick Posts: 528 Member
    I'll accept a request from a woman I don't know IRL sometimes, but if it's a guy, it has to be someone that I and my husband both know and are okay with. Just to keep everything on the up and up between us.
  • chrissismone
    chrissismone Posts: 116 Member
    Im a bit too fresh on here so I just deleted the one and only guy I had on my list and will do my best not to add anymore unless they are actually positive contributor. I have noticed the guys and ones of a certain racial background get alot groupies and such and I just don't like that type of energy. I think for some also speaking about womanly issues they may re frame from saying things I know I have because out of respect of a guy. I wish I could have some nice men folk to look at though..time will only tell if that is possible.
  • I get the "no boys allowed" part, but why have an album full of pics of your chest? Are you tracking progress in your bra size? Who are these pics for, especially if you're being gender-specific due to a BF/ Husband? I always found that one odd.

    Thank. You.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    I get the "no boys allowed" part, but why have an album full of pics of your chest? Are you tracking progress in your bra size? Who are these pics for, especially if you're being gender-specific due to a BF/ Husband? I always found that one odd.

    ^^Agreed!
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    The weight/fitness/body composition/diet goals are totally different to women's. I prefer to add friends on the basis of them having something in common with me.

    I accept requests, but don't make any, and if I don't see anything that I can relate to, support, or I don't receive any support, within a few weeks, I delete them.

    I've also experienced young men treating this like a dating site... which is not what I am comfortable with when I'm at my most vulnerable!

    That's true. That's a very reasonable reason. :)
  • fatcellsuck
    fatcellsuck Posts: 184
    Hey if any of you ladies wanna request me, go ahead. :)
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
    Some of these women have had bad experiences with men on the site. You must never have met the man who will offer to send you pictures of his bits after you accept his request.
    Hey, baby. Check out my bits...

    drill-bits-30363.jpg

    Takei_OH_MY.jpg
  • albinogorilla
    albinogorilla Posts: 1,056 Member
    my goals are not in line with most (not all) women on this site, so its understandable that they don't want to be make believe internet friends with me, but i dont send out any friend requests anyway, so non-issue
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
    Hey if any of you ladies wanna request me, go ahead. :)

    BTW, this is one of those creepy ones I told you about.
  • atjays
    atjays Posts: 797 Member
    Well a few things to notice, yes guys on here are going to have majority of their friends be female, I'd venture to bet the active people on this site are at least 60%+ Female ... And quite honestly just personal preference, but I prefer talking to girls over guys for the most part. Conversations and support tend to be deeper than "good job brah!" from some muscle head.

    This whole stigma works both ways. I get friend requests everyday from girls I've never talked to/helped, aren't even close to my age, don't live near me, don't send a message or bother acting like they have anything in common and it doesn't bother me. I've even gotten them from girls who have the "I don't friend guys" in their profiles .... tell me how that works...

    To the girls getting unwanted harrassment, check your profile pic, what you say in posts and overall how you present yourself to the community. I'd imagine a lot could be avoided by not having a profile full of scantily clad photos, what kind of attention did you think you were going to get?
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    I don't have it posted on my profile but I only accept friend requests from females. IRL, my closest friends are guys and I love them to pieces. However, I just feel during this journey I need more support from other females. Girls have said really hurtful things to me growing up and made fun of me a lot for my weight; so, I find it to be healing to surround myself with other women on the same journey who can cheer me on!

    Aww, that's sad that girls gave you trouble growing up! I really like this answer. It's a really good reason. If you're ever looking for more friends, feel free to send a request my way. :)
  • twinlaced
    twinlaced Posts: 46 Member
    It's kind of like the same reason that women search out all-female gyms. If I could go to a female gym, I would. However I get along better with guys usually, so who cares lol
  • Trail_Addict
    Trail_Addict Posts: 1,340 Member


    Takei_OH_MY.jpg

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • WarriorMom2012
    WarriorMom2012 Posts: 621 Member
    I have some really bad personal messages sent to me. I block them immediately, but hard to have too many guy friends after that. I wont put up with it.

    You have a bellybutton made for shots....just saying...
  • SergeantSunshine_reused
    SergeantSunshine_reused Posts: 5,382 Member
    I get the "no boys allowed" part, but why have an album full of pics of your chest? Are you tracking progress in your bra size? Who are these pics for, especially if you're being gender-specific due to a BF/ Husband? I always found that one odd.

    ^^Agreed!

    This would be odd i agree o.O
  • WingMan380
    WingMan380 Posts: 2,139 Member
    My wife and I are both on here. I have males and females on my friends list including my wife and she has male and female friends on her list as well. Same on facebook and twitter. My wife and I trust each other and we know that we are on here for support in our weight loss efforts.
  • shaelataylor
    shaelataylor Posts: 224 Member
    i accept pretty much anyone who adds me lol i like having the friends and extra support. now i do go through and clean out my friends on occasion because i like for my friends to actually use mfp so that we can support each other. i have had an experience that made me a little uncomfortable with a male user (which is hard to do because i take most banter in stride if its a joke. harmless flirtation doesnt shake me much either) but he wasnt joking and kept asking for pictures and such...i still accept guys though. id hate to delete them all because one of their kind is dumb. :P
  • Elleinnz
    Elleinnz Posts: 1,661 Member
    I have a few guy friends on here - all of them happily in relationships - I respect them and their relationships - and in return all I have had from them is great support and friendship......

    I don't believe there are all that much difference between an obese guy's journey to health and fitness and mine at all......having said that the majority of my male friends (all 4 of them) are actually at goal and working on building muscle, strength and improving their physiques - and I am learning heaps from them - and the knowledge that they are sharing......so would not trade one of these guys at all!!

    One can see easy enough if someone is "creepy" and it is easy to go "remove" when you are not comfortable with the online relationship.....
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    Well a few things to notice, yes guys on here are going to have majority of their friends be female, I'd venture to bet the active people on this site are at least 60%+ Female ... And quite honestly just personal preference, but I prefer talking to girls over guys for the most part. Conversations and support tend to be deeper than "good job brah!" from some muscle head.

    This whole stigma works both ways. I get friend requests everyday from girls I've never talked to/helped, aren't even close to my age, don't live near me, don't send a message or bother acting like they have anything in common and it doesn't bother me. I've even gotten them from girls who have the "I don't friend guys" in their profiles .... tell me how that works...

    To the girls getting unwanted harrassment, check your profile pic, what you say in posts and overall how you present yourself to the community. I'd imagine a lot could be avoided by not having a profile full of scantily clad photos, what kind of attention did you think you were going to get?

    I love everything about this post.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
    i accept pretty much anyone who adds me lol i like having the friends and extra support. now i do go through and clean out my friends on occasion because i like for my friends to actually use mfp so that we can support each other. i have had an experience that made me a little uncomfortable with a male user (which is hard to do because i take most banter in stride if its a joke. harmless flirtation doesnt shake me much either) but he wasnt joking and kept asking for pictures and such...i still accept guys though. id hate to delete them all because one of their kind is dumb. :P

    Agreed!
  • carolanne84
    carolanne84 Posts: 53 Member
    I actually don't have any male friends on here yet, I am not opposed to it as long as they are not creepers.