Women who don't accept male friend requests

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  • iwantniceabs
    iwantniceabs Posts: 357 Member
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    I have lots of great guy friends on MFP. BUT, I remember when I first got on here, my first set of friends were females - I think I was just trying to keep myself honest - just like how I suck my gut in when I'm around my guy friends, but don't even think about that stuff when I'm hanging out with my girls. I was thinking that if I was friends with guys, I wouldn't want to log all the cookies I stuffed my face with or anything that was unattractive. I guess I just realized that I don't see any of these people in real life, so what's the harm in letting these guys know how unattractive I can be at times? :) I'm sure women that only friend women have lots of different reasons.
  • oliviaseward
    oliviaseward Posts: 66 Member
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    i have a couple of guy friends on here but i have had other guys that ive accepted send me not so approriate messages like asking for boob shots -_- im not on this site so you can hit on me. i automatically will decline anyone who doesnt send me a message. its the first line on my profile. women who add me send a message and that makes me know that they read my profile. most guys, not all but most dont send me a message and i know that they arent interested in being "awesome lets help each other out " fitness friends because they didnt even take the time to read my profile.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
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    Guess i'm just more careful about male users even though they haven't given me much reason to feel this way. Sorry guys :/

    It's understandable considering you can never actlly be sure of who you're talking to when you're part of an online community
  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
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    Because they can. Who cares?
  • marynificent
    marynificent Posts: 110 Member
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    Because I don't want to think twice if i ***** about gaining weight from my period, that i have been farting all day, or if i want to post a picture of my big ol boobs in a bikini. I didn't even friend my husband. HA.
  • slowturtle1
    slowturtle1 Posts: 284 Member
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    I'm happy to have any friends...animal, vegetable or mineral. Bring them on! I'm new and really like the community.

    ^That made me laugh. :laugh:
    I think I understand why some women wouldn't want male friends, I'm just not one of them. I never considered excluding anyone, but my husband did notice me responding to a post one night and said, "Who's Larry!?" I had to laugh because we've been married almost 7 years and only now (that I'm beginning to lose some weight) has my husband started to show even a hint of jealousy. I asked him if it bothered him that I have male friends on MFP and he said he really didn't care, he just hadn't thought about it until he saw I was responding to a guy. As long as the guy is not out of line, and he gives me constructive feedback/advice, I'm happy to have as a friend.
  • JenAiMarres
    JenAiMarres Posts: 767 Member
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    I dont have guy friends...If I did I couldn't talk about my constipation issues constantly!! Lmao!!! Just kidding...sorta!
  • JoniBologna
    JoniBologna Posts: 653 Member
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    I have one guy friend on MFP. He is pretty down to earth. I have had others, but I deleted them. There were a couple who were too flirty (I'm in a relationship). Also, I do a fair amount of *****ing about my period, so I guess I don't want to subject them to it. I don't have an absolute ban on male friends, but generally, I'm more comfortable talking about weight and body image stuff with women.
  • takehimaway
    takehimaway Posts: 499 Member
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    As someone who is gender variant, but assigned female at birth, living as male, it puts me off from making female friends that are like, "OMFG, NO BOYS ALLOWED." Neither of the people I'm in a relationship with tell me who I can or cannot talk to, unless someone is dangerous, be it abusive ex-lovers, serial killers, ad infinitum; now would I ever waste my time or energy with someone who did so. I'm a grown adult; I make the choices of who I can and can't talk to. I have no problem adding anyone who wants/needs support; we are all here for the same thing.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    Some women just want the freedom of being able to say things they (falsely) believe would gross us out - we know you poop, fart and all the stuff ya know. Others do it out of respect for their partners, and others still just do it 'because'. It's no big deal really and I don't think most of us take offence to rejections on those grounds.
  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,967 Member
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    I have a couple males who sent me friend requests and I accepted them. Part of me feels kind of weird about it but I don't really have any pictures up that are revealing so it's not really that weird to me. if I put pictures of myself up in underwear to show progress i would feel weird having male friends, but at the same time, I'd be posting it on the internet. So it's kind of fair game.
  • bushidowoman
    bushidowoman Posts: 1,599 Member
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    I have lots of male friends IRL and on Facebook. I like guys!
    But on here, I want to show off my hard work, I want to be comfortable doing so, and I also want my hubby to be comfortable with it.

    For example, I lift weights, eat a lot of calories, and have only lost 6 lbs in the past 5 months. If I posted progress pics where I was clothed, you wouldn't be able to tell much of a difference. BUT comparison pics in a thong--now you can see a big difference! I want to encourage the ladies that it's not all about the numbers on the scale, but I don't want to show off my booty to the guys.
    Make sense?
  • FireTigerSoul
    FireTigerSoul Posts: 274 Member
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    I usually check to see if they have male and female friends on their profile already. Too often I've received requests from men who ONLY have women as friends on their profile, and to be honest...that creeps me out. :/ I don't accept those requests.
  • SofaKingRad
    SofaKingRad Posts: 1,592 Member
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    The reason I don't accept male friend requests is something you hit on- the progress pics i've taken have been so helpful to me in seeing my progress but i don't feel comfortable having others guys look at and comment on my body. I'm engaged and i know 1. my fiancee wouldn't be comfortable with it either and 2. he is extremely supportive and always gives me feedback, constructive criticism, and encouragement. Also, men and women are SO different in what they need to train. I read forums and blogs so i do see good advice but i like to talk with women so i can relate.
    If i get a male friend request, which is not frequent, i send a polite message explaining why i won't accept and wish them luck and offer encouragement. I have always gotten nice and respectful messages back so it's not really those men i'm guarding against. Just a little more cautious although anything on the internet is pretty public these days...

    Yah might wanna make yer profile more private then. Yer picz are very visible.
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
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    Some of these women have had bad experiences with men on the site. You must never have met the man who will offer to send you pictures of his bits after you accept his request.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
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    Or it could be that they girls want to talk about girly matters like TOM and feel more comfortable when it's all girls. I read that on someone's profile so that's another reason.

    I guess that's an obvious reason, but it didn't really occur to me. I'm an engineering student, so I'm constantly surrounded by guys, and therefore I have no shame at all about saying pretty much anything about my TOM in front of my guy friends. That's probably not a good thing, but hey, I have to b**** to someone, right
  • ccmccoy09
    ccmccoy09 Posts: 284 Member
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    I have lots of great guy friends on MFP. BUT, I remember when I first got on here, my first set of friends were females - I think I was just trying to keep myself honest - just like how I suck my gut in when I'm around my guy friends, but don't even think about that stuff when I'm hanging out with my girls. I was thinking that if I was friends with guys, I wouldn't want to log all the cookies I stuffed my face with or anything that was unattractive...

    Me too. I didn't specifically say "no dudes" but I only added women at first. I couldn't put my finger on why but this is totally it. You have to lay yourself pretty bare if you're going to be serious about weight loss.
  • niffydee
    niffydee Posts: 11 Member
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    I am sure people have many different reasons and it really shouldn't bother anyone.
    It's perfectly within their rights.
  • asia_hanebach
    asia_hanebach Posts: 275 Member
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    Some of these women have had bad experiences with men on the site. You must never have met the man who will offer to send you pictures of his bits after you accept his request.

    :O Nope, I can't say I've ever had that happen, not on mfp anyway!
  • fit_kitty
    fit_kitty Posts: 2
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    I don't have male friends because I don't think men would understand the situation I'm in. Plus they all attach messages that say **** like "hey qt" or something else stupid. Men, tsk tsk.

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