Favorite CLEAN jokes?

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AmberJslimsAWAY
AmberJslimsAWAY Posts: 2,468 Member
in Chit-Chat
Mine:

Why do gorillas have big nostrils?













Because they have big fingers!

:laugh: :laugh:



JOKES ARE NOT FUNNY IF YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN THEM! Stop explaining your jokes! lol They are funny!
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  • sdrawkcabynot
    sdrawkcabynot Posts: 466 Member
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    What are the dirtiest animals on the farm?


    "Brown Chicken Brown Cow"







    get it
    ?


    sounds like Bow chicca bow wow... lol - yeah it sounds better in person!
  • NKF92879
    NKF92879 Posts: 601 Member
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    What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him?
    Nothing, he just let out a little whine.


    Why can't you tell a secret in a corn field?
    It's full of ears!

    What do you call a fish with no eyes?
    FSH!!!
  • paigemarie93
    paigemarie93 Posts: 778 Member
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    A man walks into a bar...



























    & says "ouch".
  • cavaaller_85
    cavaaller_85 Posts: 94 Member
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    A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender makes it up, hands it to him, and says, "For you, no charge."
  • sdrawkcabynot
    sdrawkcabynot Posts: 466 Member
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    A man walks into a bar...



























    & says "ouch".


    so dumb that i laughed! hahahahaha
  • AmberJslimsAWAY
    AmberJslimsAWAY Posts: 2,468 Member
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    2 potatoes are walking down the street, how do you know which is the prostitute?







    The one with the sticker that says "Idaho"
  • Nikkei24
    Nikkei24 Posts: 282 Member
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    What did the hot dog say when he won the race???





    "I'm a weiner"
  • johnlatv
    johnlatv Posts: 655 Member
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    Why did the chicken cross the road?
  • AmberJslimsAWAY
    AmberJslimsAWAY Posts: 2,468 Member
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    These are super cute!
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,291 Member
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    Ok, newly married couple....home on their first day after the honeymoon.....the husband is ready to head out to work when his wife says hey hun, can I make you something for breakfast? He says hey how about we (ahem ahem) instead...so they go at it.....
    and he takes off to work.
    Lunchtime rolls around and he stops in tellin the wife honey I'm home......wife turns and says ok what do you want for lunch? Well, how about we (ahem ahem) instead?
    so they go another round and he heads back to work.......So he finishes his day and as he walks in, sees his wife sliding down the banister. He turns to his wife and says hey hun, what are you doing?
    I just figured I'd warm up dinner
  • lcchrt
    lcchrt Posts: 234 Member
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    Last night I dream''t I was in a muffler...
























    I woke up exhausted.
  • MiloBloom83
    MiloBloom83 Posts: 2,724 Member
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    A pirate walks into a bar, with a ship's wheel sticking out of his waistband. The bartender says, "Do you know you have a ship's wheel sticking out of your pants?". To which the pirate says, "Aarrgg, and it's drivin' me nuts!".
  • catattack13
    catattack13 Posts: 117
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    what's blue and smells like red paint?


    BLUE PAINT.
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,291 Member
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    What did the fish say when he hit the cement wall? Dam...
  • AmberJslimsAWAY
    AmberJslimsAWAY Posts: 2,468 Member
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    what's blue and smells like red paint?


    BLUE PAINT.

    I laughed
  • paigemarie93
    paigemarie93 Posts: 778 Member
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    what's blue and smells like red paint?


    BLUE PAINT.

    I laughed more than I think I should have at this :')
  • MinnesotaManimal
    MinnesotaManimal Posts: 642 Member
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    Why was the baby ant so confused?













    Because his Uncle was an Ant too.... ( ant----aunt..... oh forget it...)
  • BruteSquad
    BruteSquad Posts: 373 Member
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    Irish heritage here so I can tell it, and if you are Irish, you know the truth of it:

    A man driving home from celebrating St. Patty's Day gets pulled over by the police. The officer says, "Sir, have you been out drinking?"
    The man says, in his Irish borough, " Aye, I had a wee drop to celebrate the great St. Patrick."
    The officer, " well sir, your driving is erratic. Did you realize your wife fell out of the car about a mile back?"
    The man responds, " Oh, thank God, I thought I had gone deaf..."
  • doorki
    doorki Posts: 2,611 Member
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    A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper replied, "Really!?! You have a drink named Steve?"
  • JJShotz
    JJShotz Posts: 43 Member
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    What's green and has wheels?






    Grass, I was just kiddin' about the wheels.

    Dumb...but still makes me laugh.

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