girls ... do you mind if your men go to strip clubs?

BAMFMeredith

Why do people even bother with these posts? Those who are adamantly opposed have their reasons, and they are not going to change their minds no matter what. And those that are all for it are not going to change their minds either.

And somebody is going to say something mean about a stripper, and then somebody who actually is a stripper is gonna be all "Hey! I'm a good person working my way through college!" or whatever, and then somebody's gonna quote the Bible, then somebody's gonna be all "I'm an atheist, your Bible means nothing to me" and then somebody is gonna be told they're going to Hell and so on and so forth.

So how about everybody just go eat a cookie or something because your blood sugar is low, go for a jog to boost those endorphins, then go get it on with your partner, and have a good day.

06fusion4us

My husband is a retired Navy sailor. He's been to strip clubs all over the world. Any club in the U.S. is a Disney movie, according to him, compared to what he's seen, so he really has no interest in going. That being said, we do cross the border from time to time, where the strip clubs are a bit more "adventurous." I'm another one who doesn't care where he gets his appetite, I know exactly what to serve up!

Awesome Response!!!!

MELLY319

BUMP

TylerJ76

We made a little vow that included the words "forsaking all others" and "love, HONOR, and respect". . .walking into that sort of establishment would certainly NOT be upholding his end of the deal.

So, yah. . .I'd have a big problem with it. '

My 2 cents.

"forsaking all others" - so that means you no longer speak to your family, you have no friends? If you want to get literal it means your spouse is the ONLY one in your life, that you don't just give up "lusting" after someone else but you give up every person in your life with the exception of him.

Why do you care so much if people don't like strip clubs or their significant other going to strip clubs? :ohwell:

melb2003

I have a couple different points of view for this. I've been married for 3 years and with my husband for 8 years. If the guys were going out on a random night (totally not a typical thing) I don't think I would be furious about him going. I mean, I don't personally like strip clubs (I'm not judging the women there, more power to them for being able to be so exposed and confident). I think I would be upset, because for me, intentionally going to a strip club to receive some type of sexual gratification from another woman (mainly because it's so physical and the woman is literally right infront of you and the potential for any part of her touching my husband) I really do see that as a form of cheating. But if the guys randomly wanted to go, I would never want him to be the outsider of the guys so I would just suck it up for one night and say whatever to it. Now if it became a usual routine, I would ask, why is there a need to go, and then we might have issues.

I'm not against porn though. For me with my husband, the actual subject where he is receiving the gratification from isn't "real", meaning that it's not possible to touch them or they touch you, the person was shot on a video and who knows where they are or what they look like now.

Believe me, I am no prude when it comes to sex with my husband. We have plenty of it, at least 4-5 times a week, and I love experimenting with ideas, toys, and I love to dress up for him. I consider myself moderately adventerous with him and I go above and beyond to make him happy. Even with my views stated above, we have no issues what so ever in that department.

totallytasha

There is also a difference between making an innocent trip to the beach and going to a strip club to seek sexual arousal. I think a husband and wife should only seek sexual fulfillment with eachother, and not look outside of the marraige for that satisfaction; ie porn, swinging and strip clubs. Why make vows to eachother if you don't want to be monogomous? I am a jelous wife (but not a totally insane one) and I don't want to share my husbands body; I am thrilled that he wants me all to himself as well. If that's the case, why would I make him feel inadequate by having a need to "whet my appitite" elsewhere before sealing the deal with him?

This. I'm not a jealous person at all. We're very open about finding others attractive. We talk about which celebrities we think are attractive, but not necessarily in a sexual way. 'That person's not ugly' is a common one, or 'I really love her hair' or something to that effect. Yeah, that person is attractive. And as long as he's not drooling or craning his neck to the point of seizure trying to get a better look, I don't care. It's human to notice and have attraction.

There's a huge difference to me in seeing a girl on the street and commenting that she looks cute, and purposefully going to a porn site or a strip club and trying to feed that appetite with a woman who is not me. That, to me, is cheating. You seek that out, you're making another woman the person of your desires, and she's the one fueling and/or fulfilling your sexual needs. For my partner, that needs to be me. For me, I look to my man. I have to say, I feel so incredibly fulfilled with my guy, I wouldn't ever dream of wanting another, and I know he feels the same about me. Maybe I'm just one of the lucky few in a relationship where all our needs are actually taken care of by the one we're with - we don't need to look outside. Running into attractiveness and acknowledging it - great. Seeking it out to fuel your desires when you're with someone perfectly wonderful and attractive (who apparently just doesn't do it for you and somehow isn't hurt by the fact that you find others to get your motor going)- not okay in the slightest.

Gilbrod

I'm curious as to why all the religious "crazies" feel the need to come into this thread and preach?

No need to harsh my mellow...

I have yet to see bible thumping. Even in Civil Ceremonies, where church IS NOT INVOLVED, the words love and honor, are still used. Just saying. I sure hope religous people aren't the only ones using those words.

P.S. I love the pic of the cow and it's meaning.

Beezil

There's a huge difference to me in seeing a girl on the street and commenting that she looks cute, and purposefully going to a porn site or a strip club and trying to feed that appetite with a woman who is not me. That, to me, is cheating. You seek that out, you're making another woman the person of your desires, and she's the one fueling and/or fulfilling your sexual needs. For my partner, that needs to be me. For me, I look to my man. I have to say, I feel so incredibly fulfilled with my guy, I wouldn't ever dream of wanting another, and I know he feels the same about me. Maybe I'm just one of the lucky few in a relationship where all our needs are actually taken care of by the one we're with - we don't need to look outside. Running into attractiveness and acknowledging it - great. Seeking it out to fuel your desires when you're with someone perfectly wonderful and attractive (who apparently just doesn't do it for you and somehow isn't hurt by the fact that you find others to get your motor going)- not okay in the slightest.

This is pretty much exactly how I feel.

twisted88

I could care less, as long as he takes me sometimes!

^This.

grassette

I'm just curious about all the people saying that they wouldn't go because their run by organized crime or human sex trafficking and the such. Does this mean you wouldn't go to church cause of all the preachers that have got caught molesting young boys, stealing from the church they represent, being caught spending church funds on hookers?

...My point is there is evil everywhere so you can't judge the whole of anything by the bad apples that are mixed up in with the good.

Those men are victims of lust, not promoters of it. They are the victims of organized crime. Which is why keeping men away from those places is a good thing. And yes, you had better be a damned good judge.

This "not judging" stuff is something only a fool would go for.

So your saying organized crime is what made these priest have sex with young boys? From what I read not many of the priests spent a large amount of time at the local strip club before hand either...
That being said my cousin worked as a stripper for a couple years while finishing up college and not once was she part of organized crime. Now she has her degree a good job and is able to support herself and her daughter working a regular job.

Thank goodness she was able to break away from that life!

Well that life as you say was what was responsible for her being able to take her life and career to the next level. While there's people that work in the factory I work at that are probably on drugs, beat their wife, spend most their life drunk. But I guess since they keep their clothes on their good people...

They might be sinners, but at least they are not exploiting/stimulating the lust of others to make money. There are better, more ethical ways of taking your career to the next level. Using your beauty is such a way leaves traces on the soul that you can never get rid of. Plus it drags down other souls with it, marking them in ways that aren't pretty too. Purity is worth the struggle. Money is not everything. So, yes, those drunks and drug addicts are better people.

*sigh*

Well I know I'm not pure! I guess I'm slated for the fast track to hell.

Who wants to join me?:devil:

As AC/DC said I'm on a Highway to Hell 8-)
[/quote


Yeah, I know. But you can get off the bus any time. No one is keeping you there.

RebeccaLynn20

Why make vows to eachother if you don't want to be monogomous?

Not all vows have to do with monogamy.

Marriage vows do..

sawyermark

Why make vows to eachother if you don't want to be monogomous?

Not all vows have to do with monogamy.

Marriage vows do..

Unless your Mormon 8-)

spade117

Why make vows to eachother if you don't want to be monogomous?

Not all vows have to do with monogamy.

Marriage vows do..

Unless your Mormon 8-)

Or anyone who wrote their own who may not have included anything about that.

ZaneNicole

If my husband ever went to one he'd b gone!

liftingheavy

I'm going to jump in on this topic, since it seems like it's pretty popular right now. Just answering the simple question, as to if girls mind if their men go to strip clubs, and my answer is no, I do not mind. If my husband went to a strip club, I really do not see the huge deal in it. I do understand that there's many different ways you can look at it. I just look at it as, it is a way of life, woman strip.. men enjoy to go watch every now and then.. women enjoy to go watch, I don't see the huge deal. I just think he can look as much as he wants, as long he doesn't touch. I mean I understand if they would touch from a lap dance or something, just wouldn't want him to personally grope her. My husband has gone once with a bunch of friends to a bachelor party, and I said you can look as much as you want.. but I found it a turn on to him coming home to me all hott and bothered.

You said your husband went once. Maybe a couple of times at a bachelor party or something. That is different from the question... It was, do you mind if your men go to strip clubs. Not strip CLUB at his bachelor party, or on a milestone birthday, which I do not like either, but these women act like it's normal to go once a month or a week. You would not have a problem with that?

liftingheavy

also i live in Florida and when i say girls at the beach are way more worse than the women at the strip club , girls have came up to me with my child and man and tried to talk to him needless to say when we go to a strip club it is just more or less the environment . my bf tells me all the time it isnt the most attractive thing ... women who take their clothes off and all that. he likes women who are dressed nicely or hippyish it is hard to explain. but you shouldnt feel jealous .i always say dont not come home and no lapdances that is my thing. from there all the rest is trust.

I went to Miami, and holy smokes, what I saw on the beach!!! You are right about that!!! Doesn't bother me though. I expect to see clantily clothed women on the beach, and that is fine. We are at the beach. That is a FAR CRY from sending my man to a friggin joint where the entire point is to have naked women on a pole attempting to arouse my man for dollars. And if the stripper is lucky or exceptionally talented, she hopes to have him there every week.

Totally different.

liftingheavy

I sorta do but that's because of my own insecurities mostly. If I wasn't so fat he wouldn't want to look at other women etc.
my husband used to go to them quite a bit, didn't help that while he was in college he lived right beside one! He likes to tell me the food was good and they mostly just played pool, but I am no dummy.....any guy with a healthy sexual appetite is not going to ignore a dancing naked woman!!
Would I forbid him to go....no, I am his wife not his mother. What used to be a frequent even when he was younger has now become a very rare occurance and is always when he is out with a bunch of other guys, not saying they drag him there or anything, but I think it would bother me more if he was going there on his own then as part of a group who when out of town for a hockey tournament think it would be funny to go to a strip club since they are all living the single dream with their wives and kids at home.
Bottom line, I know my husband will never cheat on me.....but don't I like the idea of him watching naked women flop around for money....not really, but it's not the end of the world either.
As for the porn comments.....sometimes watching a little porn is the only thing that can get ME in the mood considering my very low libido!
Relax girls....if he isn't hiding it from you or going there alone and often....I don't think it's a big deal. Hell, if I had the body for it I would have been a stripper during my younger college years! Would have made it a lot easier to pay the bills and not have school debts hanging over my head!
This all in mind.....I have never seen male strippers and would really like to! I know there's only one I can touch til death do us part....but is looking really so bad?

If your guy used to like to, or does still like to go to strip clubs, I do not think it has anything to do with your weight. Unless he married you as a waif girl, he likes some meat on your bones. If you are not happy with your weight, you are doing something about it here.

MysticMaiden22

The way I see it, let him go. They can't do anything with the strippers anyway...

And he'll come home to me all hot and bothered, maybe even slightly inebriated...more fun for us!

liftingheavy

I'm going to jump in on this topic, since it seems like it's pretty popular right now. Just answering the simple question, as to if girls mind if their men go to strip clubs, and my answer is no, I do not mind. If my husband went to a strip club, I really do not see the huge deal in it. I do understand that there's many different ways you can look at it. I just look at it as, it is a way of life, woman strip.. men enjoy to go watch every now and then.. women enjoy to go watch, I don't see the huge deal. I just think he can look as much as he wants, as long he doesn't touch. I mean I understand if they would touch from a lap dance or something, just wouldn't want him to personally grope her. My husband has gone once with a bunch of friends to a bachelor party, and I said you can look as much as you want.. but I found it a turn on to him coming home to me all hott and bothered.

If that is your picture, you are a very beautiful woman. Why would he need to get hot and bothered watching some other woman? Even if this is not your picture, you should be hot enough for your man.

mrphil86

the man I marry would not be in a place of temptation. I'm not prude, I understand that men have their needs, but my husband should come to me to have his needs met and same with/for me. If you lust in your heart, you have already committed adultery.

So the man you marry wouldn't be allowed to go the beach because the girls running around in skimpy bikini's showing off their assets might be tempting.

He wouldn't be able to walk down the street because there might be an extremely attractive girl in a short skirt that he might be tempted to look at.

There are a lot of situations outside of a strip club that could be considered tempting.

Just skimming through this whole thing makes me sick and this had of been one of the best posts on this subject.

I know a lot of you women (Not saying all) look at men too. This website is full of fit men and women. Given then chance, well, I need not say more.

I sure do not want to be married to a woman who could not trust me. Obviously she has problems of her own which makes me not trust her.

It's natural that men are attracted to beautiful women and that urge needs to be sated. Doesn't mean he is going to act on it. If you shelter him however, it's going to build up. If you can't accept that, well, humanity is doomed anyways and you can just ride the train.

DannyMussels

it's 'women' not 'girls' (in the subject line)
and yes i would mind - not because he is looking at other women, but I don't respect anyone who buys into that sh** and supports something like that in society.

It's 'girls' and not 'women' when you're 10-20yrs younger than most of us.

Also, I dont' respect anyone who speaks like this about strippers.

Why are all you women so damn angry? A simple 'sure' or 'no way' would suffice.

Perhaps a little less 'chit-chat' secion and a little more 'weight-loss' ?

Just an idea.

giggitygoo

Would I care? A little, I suppose, but I wouldn't stop him from going. Other attractive women exist. No biggie. I just make a point to look super good when he walks in the door.

He just better prepare for some semi aggressive, show-you-who's-boss sex when he gets home.

bigredhearts

i do, but mostly because i know he can check out a much finer piece of *kitten* at home... so theres no need to waste OUR hard earned cash :happy:

id also like to point out that my husband and i agree that he shouldnt be looking at anything he wouldnt want me to do. for instance, he shouldnt look at women taking off their clothes in front of a bunch of people unless he wouldnt care if i did it. to me, they lie on the same moral line. as for the appetite thing, my goods are the best and i know it, so i refuse to be the hubby's second choice...

liftingheavy

We made a little vow that included the words "forsaking all others" and "love, HONOR, and respect". . .walking into that sort of establishment would certainly NOT be upholding his end of the deal.

So, yah. . .I'd have a big problem with it. '

My 2 cents.

"forsaking all others" - so that means you no longer speak to your family, you have no friends? If you want to get literal it means your spouse is the ONLY one in your life, that you don't just give up "lusting" after someone else but you give up every person in your life with the exception of him.

Are you in a committed relationship? If yes, do you want your woman at male strip clubs? If you answered before, I did not read it. What does family have to do with a committed relationship and nudity reserved for the two in such a relationship?

Il_DaniD_lI

My best friend is a stripper and when she gives lap dances to men she find unattractive she will pick her nose in secret and wipe it on their arms. Just something to think about.

ccmccoy09

Nope. I think strip clubs are ridiculous. If the guy I was with wanted to pay money to watch a woman who is not interested in him AT ALL dance "for him," and then not be able to touch her or be with her sexually, whatever. Fine. Have your fun. And do not give me any **** for spending money on my fabulous shoes. :bigsmile:

My husband has no interest. He thinks they're dumb too, for the same reasons. I know there are strip clubs involved at every bachelor party he's been to, but I honestly couldn't care less. My ex used to go to them quite often, it was a common occurrence in his business to take clients out for steak dinner and a strip club (a hilarious combo to me) but it never bothered me.

The only time I think I'd be bothered is if he went regularly, if he was spending money we couldn't afford to spend, or if it interfered with our own intimacy. But even then, I think those signs are indicative of a problem with the man, and not the fault of a strip club.

femmi1120

The way I see it, let him go. They can't do anything with the strippers anyway...

That's not totally true... the fact that prostitution is illegal doesn't exactly stop anyone. It's not uncommon for married men to get sexual favors from the strippers. Just basing this off of what I was told from someone I met who actually is a stripper.

bigredhearts

Why do people even bother with these posts? Those who are adamantly opposed have their reasons, and they are not going to change their minds no matter what. And those that are all for it are not going to change their minds either.

And somebody is going to say something mean about a stripper, and then somebody who actually is a stripper is gonna be all "Hey! I'm a good person working my way through college!" or whatever, and then somebody's gonna quote the Bible, then somebody's gonna be all "I'm an atheist, your Bible means nothing to me" and then somebody is gonna be told they're going to Hell and so on and so forth.

So how about everybody just go eat a cookie or something because your blood sugar is low, go for a jog to boost those endorphins, then go get it on with your partner, and have a good day.

this, is pure genius. :happy:

liftingheavy

My husband is a retired Navy sailor. He's been to strip clubs all over the world. Any club in the U.S. is a Disney movie, according to him, compared to what he's seen, so he really has no interest in going. That being said, we do cross the border from time to time, where the strip clubs are a bit more "adventurous." I'm another one who doesn't care where he gets his appetite, I know exactly what to serve up!

Awesome Response!!!!

Is it? Being the "go to" when he's all hot and bothered by a naked woman with her P in his face? I would kick his _ss to the best of my ability and he would be out of my life. If he does not like my goods, he can move on. Period.

stargazer008

I wouldn't mind actually because I would trust the guy. Guys are visual creatures and all so I understand if they want to go to strip clubs. There's a reason why a guy is with you and not with stripper girl.