Ladies - Would you date someone who is divorced?

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  • Flippiefloppies
    Flippiefloppies Posts: 319
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    My boyfriend is divorced. He did what he thought was the right thing and married a girl that he got pregnant. They were dating at the time. It just did not work out. They are still on very good terms and I actually get along wonderfully with her. She states often that she is very happy that he has found someone she likes to help raise her child. We actually talk and email alot. Alot people would say that it is weird but I wouldn't want it any other way. She just recently remarried and had her second child. We took her and my boyfriends son to see the new baby the day after delivery and hung out awhile with them. I would say that yea it is not for everyone but in my case it has worked out wonderfully for me and I would not change a thing.
  • Runthismom
    Runthismom Posts: 49
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    When I started dating by BF of nearly 3 years, he told me right away. They weren't happy, and she chose not to make any effort to continue the relationship. It ended, and then a few years later he met me. We have been together longer than they were, including the marriage. He also told me right away that he had no interest in going down that road again for quite some time. While some date to get married, I dated to find my partner, my soulmate...and I had no problem waiting until he was ready. Divorce is a hard thing for people to go through, and I don't think that it should be something that is a deal-breaker. If, however, children are involved...that is a different story. You have to be ready for the whole she-bang at that point.
  • whoiskat23
    whoiskat23 Posts: 103 Member
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    Divorce isn't a deal breaker for me. I'd have a few questions, but I have those for any one i'm considering dating. I think there are other things to worry about besides him being "divorced".
  • Lift_This_
    Lift_This_ Posts: 2,756 Member
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    Yeah...why not. I see nothing wrong with dating a divorced person.
  • Jlfisch
    Jlfisch Posts: 27
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    If I were single and not married I wouldn't hold it against a person if they were divorced. The only thing I wouldn't stand for is someone that lies, steals, refuses to work, or cheats. If they were divorced for any of these reasons then no I wouldn't be interested.
  • ForeverIrish
    ForeverIrish Posts: 232 Member
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    I am divorced. My significant other is divorced. He was married to someone that used him as an ATM. The only difference is that an ATM gets serviced occasionally.

    Let me make one thing perfectly clear: I am the happiest divorced person on this planet. I was married to someone that drank every penny we made, never came home, and disregarded my feelings completely. When he did come home, I was awakened to the surprise of hot, alcohol-drenched vomit splashing on me while I tried to sleep. This happened more than once. Yes, I am divorced. And for 19 years, NOBODY has ever puked on me while sleeping.

    I am in no way, shape or form, perfect. I have plenty of faults. I can't balance a checkbook, I am NOT "Minnesota Nice," and you will always know exactly where you stand with me because I will tell you. I will always be there for my friends and family, I will always root for the underdog, and I will always treat people with dignity and respect and help those that need it.

    My significant other recognizes both my good and my challenging qualities. He loves me for both. I would hate to think that we would have missed out on the relationship of our lives because one of us was narrow minded enough to discount the other because of a miserable first marriage.

    If someone won't give you the time of day because you are divorced, you don't need a judgemental person like that in your life.

    --Just my two cents.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,370 Member
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    A lady...sure!

    A guy...nah.
  • Dohrnl
    Dohrnl Posts: 43 Member
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    I definitely would. I think that sometimes we think we know what we want and make choices based on that. Don't get discouraged. Someone is out there for you and if they have the problem that you are divorced then they aren't for you!
  • Kaimana94
    Kaimana94 Posts: 165 Member
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    No.

    Because I date to get married, and I am not promising "till death" to someone who has already illustrated that marraige doesn't mean that.

    As a new divorcee (20 Mar 2012) I would like to say. I was not the one that asked or wanted the divorce. I really did mean my vows. Not that I'm ready to date just yet.
  • j4nash
    j4nash Posts: 1,719 Member
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    No.

    Because I date to get married, and I am not promising "till death" to someone who has already illustrated that marraige doesn't mean that.

    As a new divorcee (20 Mar 2012) I would like to say. I was not the one that asked or wanted the divorce. I really did mean my vows. Not that I'm ready to date just yet.

    Same here.
  • HelloSweetie4
    HelloSweetie4 Posts: 1,214 Member
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    If i were single, then yeah probably (everyone deserves a chance). The only way I wouldn't date someone who is divorced is if they bad mouth their ex all the time or they've had a lot of divorces.
  • jsapninz
    jsapninz Posts: 909 Member
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    No.

    Because I date to get married, and I am not promising "till death" to someone who has already illustrated that marraige doesn't mean that.

    Sometimes there are circumstances that warrant a divorce or make it inevitable.

    "Circumstancs" is not 'till death, now is it?

    I know people who got divorced because their spouse was abusing them. Cheated on them (and in one case gave them an STI). frauded them. turned out to be gay... seriously, there are a lot of reasons why people get divorced and not all of them are issues that can be 'worked through'.

    I am not saying one shouldn't get divorced (or, preferrably annulled) in some of the extreme circumstances. I am saying I wouldn't get remarried after going through that, because obviously I didn't do a good job of picking the first time.
  • Laurej
    Laurej Posts: 227
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    Well no, my husband would hardly approve. But if I were single? Sure. Extra points if the person could be civil to the ex.

    Hahahah too cute... and ditto
  • whitetiger011680
    whitetiger011680 Posts: 218 Member
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    Yes I would. I almost even prefer it because they are more understanding of the fact that I still have contact with my ex for our kids.
  • felice03
    felice03 Posts: 2,732 Member
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    As long as the individual has learned from the reasons why their marriage failed then yes. Plus, as a soon to be divorced woman I would hate being judged bc of that.
  • jforferris01
    jforferris01 Posts: 71 Member
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    Of course. Life doesnt end just because you couldnt get along with someone, if that was the case we would never leave our houses and get out and live. O yeah and I am with the girl that says no to someone who has been divorced twice...thats a big fat clue.....
  • esphixiet
    esphixiet Posts: 214 Member
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    My partner is divorced. It helps that they divorced about 15 years ago and there were no kids in the mix.
    But I suspect the divorce is a partial explanation of why we're not married yet.
  • Elona_30
    Elona_30 Posts: 66
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    just because your divorced does not mean that you were not in it for life, the other person might have been the one to end it, things happen that just can not be put in the past, now I was not married but in a common law relationship for 10 years he had 3 children and we had a little girl 4 years ago and because of things he did I could not stay in the relstionship, there was nothing left of what once had been, to stay would be lying to myself and would have hurt my little girl, life is way better now that Im on my own and Im now with someone that has never been married and has no children of his own but he is a better Daddy then her father could ever be to her. I was not looking for anything when he fell into my lap and I thank God for him everyday. life is to short to be that picky, an you may be missing out on something that could be just what you have always wanted.
    You never know what or who is around the next corner always have an open mind :happy:
  • Jules2Be
    Jules2Be Posts: 2,267 Member
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    I am divorced. My significant other is divorced. He was married to someone that used him as an ATM. The only difference is that an ATM gets serviced occasionally.

    Let me make one thing perfectly clear: I am the happiest divorced person on this planet. I was married to someone that drank every penny we made, never came home, and disregarded my feelings completely. When he did come home, I was awakened to the surprise of hot, alcohol-drenched vomit splashing on me while I tried to sleep. This happened more than once. Yes, I am divorced. And for 19 years, NOBODY has ever puked on me while sleeping.

    I am in no way, shape or form, perfect. I have plenty of faults. I can't balance a checkbook, I am NOT "Minnesota Nice," and you will always know exactly where you stand with me because I will tell you. I will always be there for my friends and family, I will always root for the underdog, and I will always treat people with dignity and respect and help those that need it.

    My significant other recognizes both my good and my challenging qualities. He loves me for both. I would hate to think that we would have missed out on the relationship of our lives because one of us was narrow minded enough to discount the other because of a miserable first marriage.

    If someone won't give you the time of day because you are divorced, you don't need a judgemental person like that in your life.

    --Just my two cents.

    you rock
  • Tulipgirl1223
    Tulipgirl1223 Posts: 91 Member
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    I would, BUT if they had kids, they would have to be in their kids lives, and civil to the ex (not BFF or anything but at least talk to them). If they had kids and didn't speak to them, no way (because what if we ended up having kids and split).

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