He Called me Stupid..is it Emotional abuse?

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Replies

  • BlueInkDot
    BlueInkDot Posts: 702 Member
    I have 4 daughters. If any one of them would ever be treated like that I would end up in prison.

    Every woman should be treated like queen by her SO. Every man should be treated like a king by his SO. If that is not happening on both sides then it is not meant to be and it is time to move on. You are clearly not being treated right. Move on.

    Thank you for proving me wrong!!!! *phew!*
  • BarbWhite09
    BarbWhite09 Posts: 1,128 Member
    Why would you be with him at all? Don't ever be with anyone who treats you like ****. Very simple advice.
  • lour441
    lour441 Posts: 543 Member
    i don't think 'abuse' is necessarily the word, at least in the deepest, darkest sense of what it can me
    it just sounds like he's a complete tool and doesn't appreciate you
    Uhhhhh no. It's definitely abuse. >:/ Is it just me or have all the men who have posted so far have a pretty lenient definition "abuse?" >:(

    Generalize much?
  • SweetNaughtyLips
    SweetNaughtyLips Posts: 374 Member
    I wouldn't waste another second of my precious life with a fool like that! LEAVE HIM

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  • lour441
    lour441 Posts: 543 Member
    I have 4 daughters. If any one of them would ever be treated like that I would end up in prison.

    Every woman should be treated like queen by her SO. Every man should be treated like a king by his SO. If that is not happening on both sides then it is not meant to be and it is time to move on. You are clearly not being treated right. Move on.

    Thank you for proving me wrong!!!! *phew!*

    heh we are crossing paths..
  • EpiGaiaRepens
    EpiGaiaRepens Posts: 824 Member
    i sent you a PM with information about a book. But now I want to post it here in case anyone else (man or woman) thinks they might be in an abusive relationship.

    The book is called "Why Does He Do That" by Lundy Bancroft. It's written primarily about men who physically abuse female partners, but it elaborates on the methodology and psychology of abuse in general. I found the book incredible helpful in learning how to identify the ways in which I was being abused, and the ways that I was being sucked into the abusive relationship.

    Some relationships are abusive and cannot just end (I'm not talking about boyfriends, but relatives/coworkers/bosses). This book was really helpful for me in understanding how to idenitfy abuse when it was happeneing and to set a boundary to stop it's affect on me (in my case, the boundary was internal as I could not make that person leave my life entirely, but I could have boundaries for how he could interact with me and how I would engage in interacting with him).

    This book literally liberated me and I hope that others may find it helpful as well.
  • loseweightjames
    loseweightjames Posts: 360 Member

    I'm not use to being treated like this ..That's why I will leave him.

    sweet!!! I love when the first post solves the problem discussed in the topic!

    NEXT!
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
    sounds like the foundation of an extremely abusive marriage. get out
  • NICOLED73
    NICOLED73 Posts: 183
    Yes, it's abuse. Be glad you aren't married. It usually gets a whole lot worse when you are married.
    Get out. Glad you are recognizing now that this isn't right.

    It will make you stronger, better and help you find a good relationship in the future.

    I've been there. Had 3 children with my ex/abuser. I appreciate every day that I don't have to walk on eggshells anymore or listen to him degrade me or abuse me (physically).

    Get out as soon as you can.
  • tunktunk5583
    tunktunk5583 Posts: 76 Member
    My bf loves to get into deep conversation about politics, religions,social events..etc...
    Whenever he does this , I try no to talk to much for he loves to just go on and on and on...
    Then he asked me some specific questions and I answered ,,he then of course disagreed..
    I disagreed again ..he then got defensive and call me stupid and said " That is the Stupiest thing I have ever heard " Last night he gave me a whole sermon bc the kitchen sink is clogged up..he said " Never ever in this house has anyone clogged up the kitchen sink drain ..it had to be .. you!" Made me feel like crap of course and told him not to be so mean about it . He makes comments about my weight and jokes on how I always like to think about food.

    Last night as I laid down to sleep he looked at my belly and made a face of disgust. He had deleted me from his facebook account ..he then added me but has restricted ..I can't see his info or photos..


    He tends to smack me for no reason, he says he is playing . Whenever I say something that he doesn't like , he "playfully" grabs me and " Playfully" slaps me on the face...although it's not hard ..it does hurt at times and I'm getting tired of him doing that . It's just so immature. the silly slaps on my face and my *** randomly uuggg..so tired. He then comments on when he was my age he had accomplished so much ..a profession, a good job, houses,cars ...etc... and while me I haven't done much. ...again makes me feel bad. There are times he will ridicule me in from of his daughters for either having said something wrong ..or for breaking something around the house..even if they were not there to see it ..he will tell them about the accident .
    AM I Being emotional abused ?
    sure feels like it ! I will be travelling far far away and will end the relationship once I'm away ..but I put this on here just so you guys can confirm that in fact I'm not crazy and this is abuse.
    I'm not use to being treated like this ..That's why I will leave him.

    I'm no counselor or anything but woahhh yeah you need to get out of that. It's total abuse and it sounds like it has potential to turn physical...this whole "play hit" thing is NOT a good sign. The fact that you have to get "far far away" to end the relationship says a lot. You don't deserve this treatment-no one does. I wish you luck!
  • machinez
    machinez Posts: 25
    Oh yeah! Emotional abuse to the fullest, I mean, he called you stupid! Sue his *kitten*.
  • Dtregle
    Dtregle Posts: 12
    You already know the answer to your question!!
  • gettingthinandfit
    gettingthinandfit Posts: 80
    PLEASe get out of that relationship :(
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
    sorry, the face slapping bit escaped me on first read-through

    that ****'s gotta go
  • Gizziemoto
    Gizziemoto Posts: 430 Member
    It is physical and mental abuse. Get away from him now. If you have no where to go, then go to a shelter. No one has the right to slap or hit you and say just playing around or to call you names. It will only escalate. You deserve to be treated so much better than that.

    You can do this and you are strong enough to leave or get him out of your house. Believe me. I have been there, I have survived and found much better.
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    i don't think 'abuse' is necessarily the word, at least in the deepest, darkest sense of what it can me

    it just sounds like he's a complete tool and doesn't appreciate you

    mentally torturing someone, being verbally abusive, bullying.........it's ALL a valid and very real form of abuse. Shame on you.
  • Farfourah
    Farfourah Posts: 896 Member
    It's also physical abuse...battered women syndrome, I'm pretty sure you have it. :(
  • alyssa92982
    alyssa92982 Posts: 1,093 Member
    #1-u need to put yourself and your kids first-this guy isn't even your husband so he should not come before any of you. #2-what is this teaching your kids when they see this or hear this? Do u really want to have them learn this behavior(s) and think its acceptable in life as they get older. #3-I would be a little worried of the slapping and what not to go any further than it is. Obviously he thinks its ok to put his hands on you that way or speak to you disrespectful. If he has a short fuse/temper and its something big that breaks, gets ruined, etc I would be on my toes if I were u of possible harm. Be safe and good luck to you as I hope u make the right decision
  • kealambert
    kealambert Posts: 961 Member
    i don't think 'abuse' is necessarily the word, at least in the deepest, darkest sense of what it can me

    it just sounds like he's a complete tool and doesn't appreciate you

    mentally torturing someone, being verbally abusive, bullying.........it's ALL a valid and very real form of abuse. Shame on you.

    let's not do this.
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    Oh yeah! Emotional abuse to the fullest, I mean, he called you stupid! Sue his *kitten*.

    Did you miss the part about him slapping her.....??

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