He Called me Stupid..is it Emotional abuse?
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Hey wait im Canadian, is it me?-Ty
last thing I need right now it another man..lol
Can I have him?
lol!!!!!!!!!!0 -
Can you leave now? The sooner the better.
It is insidious, they keep making you doubt yourself until you think you are crazy and you're the stupid, crazy, unreasonable or whatever person asking to be treated that way. Eventually, you know you are so worthless that you are lucky they are still around to abuse you. It takes years to fix this. I still go through strange bouts of worthlessness. I don't know if it will ever totally go away.
I think my husband does a little better than I do but he spent years with an abusive wife and then moved on to an abusive gf who both convinced him he was crazy and stupid. Oh, they both also convinced him that using heavy drugs was a good thing and that there was something seriously wrong with him because he didn't believe that. He actually thought he was nuts because he didn't believe in shooting up and smoking dope in front of his kids! And he also was told he was crazy for going to work everyday, playing with his kids when he got home, and doing things like mowing lawns and working on cars on his weekend.
Anyway, once you get away you should really get some counseling. The fact that you have stayed with this guy shows that you have some of this type of damage and that can make you do the same thing over and over. Both hubs and I have had counseling on and off over the years to try to fix our issues but I think the thing that helped the most was finding eachother since only someone else who has been abused can understand the damage.0 -
Categorize it in any way one wishes,what you describe is at the least toxic and going no where so now the question is what do you need to do to walk away.0
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Wait till he falls asleep, sew him into the bed sheets and beat him with a bag of oranges. Leave and come back for your stuff while he is at work.0
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I know what you're saying, but with emotional abuse it's generally not the individual incident that makes it abuse. It's more like a habit of saying this kind of thing... tearing someone down slowly.I'll play devil's advocate here for a moment and say maybe in arguments where he said "That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard" is not abuse. In honesty I've said that to my wife and she has said it back to me during political, work, religious, etc. conversations because sometimes they are honestly the stupidest thing I had ever heard. Enough on the devil's advocate there. As for the rest such as the belly, the "talking down" in front of others, etc. yes, mental abuse.
Correct. If it is with every single argument that a person says that then yes, that would be clarified as emotional abuse. I was just going off the story that didn't identify if this was a single event or everyday event so, being a criminal justice student, I had to go on the story and the "evidence" presented, so I have to presume this was a single event.
He first said "You are stupid ..then he said ." that is the stupiest thing I have heard.
He has called me stupid in the past ..he playfull slapping it's an everyday thing. I'm physically tired and drain of telling him how it upsets me.0 -
Wait till he falls asleep, sew him into the bed sheets and beat him with a bag of oranges. Leave and come back for your stuff while he is at work.
very crafty !
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I think it's definitely both emotional AND physical. Since when does he 'playfully' get to slap you --- what would happen if you 'playfully' did it back to him??
You're NOT being treated right. I suggest you LEAVE!!
There are others out there - you deserve better.0 -
you betcha it is....0
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Wait till he falls asleep, sew him into the bed sheets and beat him with a bag of oranges. Leave and come back for your stuff while he is at work.
^^^ Wins Best Answer EVER!!!0 -
I come from the camp that says if you have to ask the question, you already know the answer.
I think it is time for you to move on and leave him.0 -
CallMe, i'll be your rebound-Ty
HOT!
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Yes, You are being Abuse and that is not healthy for you or anyone in the house. You don't have to live like that you are smart and you can make it . Believe me I was there at one time. I was scared to but I did it and I have been with out him going on four years. You will feel better about your self when he is gone. You will find someone that loves you for you.0
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Wait till he falls asleep, sew him into the bed sheets and beat him with a bag of oranges. Leave and come back for your stuff while he is at work.
or put some red pepper in all his underwear then sit down and watch him trying to walk...lol0 -
get out now...not in may...0
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My husband is the same way, except he doesn't hit me. I know this may be TMI, but he does hold me down and does things to me and keeps on even after I tell him to stop. He is always talking down to me and always says how I don't watch our kids well enough, yet he still lets me stay at home with them. I do watch them well though, but you can't watch them 24/7 like he thinks. Please leave him behind before you can't get out of it easily, like me.0
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Yes, it's abuse. Emotional and the beginnings of physical. He's smacking you in the face, and says he doesn't mean it...that's abuse.0
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If you wouldn't accept that kind of disrespect from a co-worker or acquaintance, why on earth would you accept it from someone who is supposed to care for you?
Ditch him. Ditch him and don't look back. Why do you need that in your life?!?0 -
You are not crazy. This is abuse. Unless you think it's unsafe to do so, end it NOW. End it before you move. End it before the day ends. You will never regret it. <HUGS>0
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Get out of there as quickly as you can, before the playful slaps get more intense. This is already abusive.
(And on a side note, I'm astonished by the sheer number of idiots suggesting she must 'like' being treated this way. Way to blame the victim, you macho twits.)0 -
I would dump him if I was you0
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Run now and don't stop.0
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He sounds controlling and emotionally abusive. I'm glad I read boyfriend and not husband. I'd dump him0
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I'm sorry but..
Are you stupid?
Are you human?0 -
Take it from a woman who's been there and done that, I don't have a restraining order from my ex husband for nothing.
YOU ARE BEING ABUSED, GET OUT OF THAT RELATIONSHIP AND GET HELP PLEASE!!!!!! DO NOT GO BACK NO MATTER WHAT, IT'S JUST GOING TO GET WORSE AND EVENTUALLY PHYSICAL.
Yes I know the whole "oh he would never hit me ever." that's what you say now, don't wait until he does.
GET OUT OF THAT RELATIONSHIP PERMANENTLY!!!0 -
CallMe, i'll be your rebound-Ty
Can I come play to?0 -
GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN. This ABUSE (and yes, it is complete abuse, verbal, physical, and emotional) will, guaranteed, escalate with time. DO NOT LET YOURSELF BECOME A STATISTIC. This happens too much already. There are some things that can be tolerated but being hit or degraded are NOT included in that group. Please choose yourself over your boyfriend. He will drain the life from you, slowly but surely.
Good luck and please add me if you'd like to be friends or need any support :flowerforyou:0 -
I hope your next post says not "why I will leave him" but "why I DID leave him" This guy is a d!ck.0
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I would leave this second he sounds like a jerk and is not worth a second of your time.0
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If you have to ask, you know it is.0
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