Home school vs public school?

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Replies

  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    My point is that we need to focus on all children in our community, not just on our own. Especially those children who are economically disadvantaged, from broken homes, whose parents are uninvolved, who are "outside the norm" in some way. By making our public schools better (because not every child can go to private school or be homeschooled), our country as a whole will benefit.

    I just don't want to see some children left behind because their parents do not care enough about their education, while the other parents are focused solely on their own children's education.

    But, at the same time, I respect everyone's opinions on this issue. This type of dialogue, when it is civil and respectful, is what we need to have if we are to make American education the best in the world (do we really want the Finns to be #1?)

    While I agree with you, I think that UNTIL the public system improves parents are within their rights to pull their kids out and teach them privately.

    Subjecting your child to an education that doesn't suit their needs just to prove a point is hardly worthwhile.

    So, my question to you is, how do we improve things? How do we provide for children who are neglected? How do we ensure classrooms aren't overcrowded? How do we help children who have difficulty learning in the typical classroom setting? How do we take care of children who are bullied beyond reason? How do we tackle these issues and make real change happen?
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    I think it really depends.... I made it through public school and turned out pretty well... but my parents supplemented my education at home... plus they are both teachers.. so that helped... I look around at the people I graduated with and a lot of them haven't turned out the way I would have thought they would.. some better... some worse.. I've been with two people that were home schooled... both of them were as intelligent as more... if not more so... but both of them are a lot more socially awkward than me. If I home school... I'm going to make sure my children are involved in plenty of activities outside of the home... this is looking more and more likely unless public schools can get their act together

    Homeschooled children being socially awkward is a stereotype and untrue at that.

    I could say to you that I was homeschooled and I am a social butterfly but this is the internet and quite frankly there's no way to prove this.

    Instead I challenge you to take a good hard look at kids who go to school. I think you'll start to notice that many of them ARE socially awkward. You just don't blame it on their schooling, instead you blame it on them. That's just how they are. That's just their personality...

    but when a homeschooled child is socially awkward it is immediately blamed on the type of education they received. And yet there are many, many homeschooled children who are NOT socially awkward.

    Funny how that works.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    I think it really depends.... I made it through public school and turned out pretty well... but my parents supplemented my education at home... plus they are both teachers.. so that helped... I look around at the people I graduated with and a lot of them haven't turned out the way I would have thought they would.. some better... some worse.. I've been with two people that were home schooled... both of them were as intelligent as more... if not more so... but both of them are a lot more socially awkward than me. If I home school... I'm going to make sure my children are involved in plenty of activities outside of the home... this is looking more and more likely unless public schools can get their act together

    This reminded me of a friend of mine from college... she is an introvert by nature and she was taught at home as well... we were talking once about people assuming that we are all socially awkward (not saying that this OP was saying that at all, it's just a common stereotype as we can see here) and that we get no social interaction with our peers... well she was telling me that her mom made them (her sisters were taught at home as well.. and one of her sisters was extroverted and they are as different as night and day) go on field trips, join activities, do all the things (and then some) that kids in traditional schools would do... they all were so tired of going out they would beg to stay home for a while... So honestly, if someone is socially awkward, who's to say they wouldn't have been anyway regardless of where they went to school? (<- rhetorical question not posted towards anyone in particular)

    editing for spelling/grammar mistakes I find that I made... because while I may excel in math and science, grammar is the bane of my existance.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    My point is that we need to focus on all children in our community, not just on our own. Especially those children who are economically disadvantaged, from broken homes, whose parents are uninvolved, who are "outside the norm" in some way. By making our public schools better (because not every child can go to private school or be homeschooled), our country as a whole will benefit.

    I just don't want to see some children left behind because their parents do not care enough about their education, while the other parents are focused solely on their own children's education.

    But, at the same time, I respect everyone's opinions on this issue. This type of dialogue, when it is civil and respectful, is what we need to have if we are to make American education the best in the world (do we really want the Finns to be #1?)
    When there are federal mandates in place on how the schools must teach and what they must teach and how they must teach, there isn't a whole lot I can do to make the school better. My son was advanced in all topics leaving preschool. They said at that time that academically, he was meeting the criteria for completion of first grade. He should have had no problem adjusting to Kindergarten.
    What I can say about what I saw already in Kindergarten was disturbing. My normally happy child was in a rage and in tears when he came home from school. He normally had to spend an hour in his room after school to even be able to function enough to interact without completely losing his composure. This was with only a half day of school. I went to the school. I volunteered in the classroom. Now, he goes to private school, all day long. Logically, the longer hours would seem to be more of a stressor. He is now completely happy. He is working at a higher level than the other kids his age. He is encouraged to work with the other kids to resolve issues, to collaboratively pick what they are going to do during their down time, and to navigate recess. He has recess 2 times a day with grades K-8. He has a teacher that is able to make sure the kids are well-rounded. She doesn't have to teach to a federal mandate that limits what she is allowed to do in the classroom.
    I was a huge supporter of public schools in the past. NCLB is not doing any favors to any children but the ones that were already behind. The kids at level and above are not encouraged to get any better. It is sad.
  • _VoV
    _VoV Posts: 1,494 Member
    I think it really depends.... I made it through public school and turned out pretty well... but my parents supplemented my education at home... plus they are both teachers.. so that helped... I look around at the people I graduated with and a lot of them haven't turned out the way I would have thought they would.. some better... some worse.. I've been with two people that were home schooled... both of them were as intelligent as more... if not more so... but both of them are a lot more socially awkward than me. If I home school... I'm going to make sure my children are involved in plenty of activities outside of the home... this is looking more and more likely unless public schools can get their act together

    Homeschooled children being socially awkward is a stereotype and untrue at that.

    I could say to you that I was homeschooled and I am a social butterfly but this is the internet and quite frankly there's no way to prove this.

    Instead I challenge you to take a good hard look at kids who go to school. I think you'll start to notice that many of them ARE socially awkward. You just don't blame it on their schooling, instead you blame it on them. That's just how they are. That's just their personality...

    but when a homeschooled child is socially awkward it is immediately blamed on the type of education they received. And yet there are many, many homeschooled children who are NOT socially awkward.

    Funny how that works.

    Excellent point.
  • cannonsky
    cannonsky Posts: 850 Member
    I think it really depends.... I made it through public school and turned out pretty well... but my parents supplemented my education at home... plus they are both teachers.. so that helped... I look around at the people I graduated with and a lot of them haven't turned out the way I would have thought they would.. some better... some worse.. I've been with two people that were home schooled... both of them were as intelligent as more... if not more so... but both of them are a lot more socially awkward than me. If I home school... I'm going to make sure my children are involved in plenty of activities outside of the home... this is looking more and more likely unless public schools can get their act together

    Homeschooled children being socially awkward is a stereotype and untrue at that.

    I could say to you that I was homeschooled and I am a social butterfly but this is the internet and quite frankly there's no way to prove this.

    Instead I challenge you to take a good hard look at kids who go to school. I think you'll start to notice that many of them ARE socially awkward. You just don't blame it on their schooling, instead you blame it on them. That's just how they are. That's just their personality...

    but when a homeschooled child is socially awkward it is immediately blamed on the type of education they received. And yet there are many, many homeschooled children who are NOT socially awkward.

    Funny how that works.

    I was just making an observation based on my experience... not a false generalization about the whole populous
  • angryguy77
    angryguy77 Posts: 836 Member
    My mom is thinking about homeschooling my eight year old sister. My sister is smart and nice, but she is socially awkward and has really bad anxiety (has meds for it) and this causes her to not want to go to school. My parents are considering homeschool, but I am unsure that it is a good idea. Does anybody have any opinions or experience with this? Thank you!

    I was taught at home from the 4th grade on up through graduation. There are MANY resources out there that help parents keep their children on track, from curriculum through the school to places that will keep records for you. And the teachers editions for homeschooling are very detailed. I liked it cause I could go at my own pace, as I always got bored in a regular classroom (they always went too slow for me). And as for social aspects, there are always co-ops and associations that a family can join to get the experiences of field trips, prom and graduation (among other things). I personally (nor my brothers) are socially awkward or stunted nor are we ignorant or behind. I hold my bachelor's in science and my youngest brother striving for medical school (he is transferring to a 4 year university this fall).

    Edit: gee I wonder how I graduated high school or college at all... My mom isn't a certified teacher and only had her high school diploma, yet I still did well. By the way, the textbooks are very detailed as well... More so than in traditional schools, because they assume the student is working on their own at some degree, in addition to the very detailed teachers additions, instead of having a teacher fill in the blanks.

    You are fortunate you had a mother who put in her time and effort to ensure you had a balanced education. But there are parents out there who can't answer or assist their children in upper grade math concepts, grammar rules, etc, I have had many parents contact me and say "I can't help junior with his grammar, because I haven't had to study this since I was 12 and I don't remember it". If a parent does not understand the content, they are doing a disservice to their child, period. They don't have to be certified teachers, but they do have to be informed enough to help their child.

    This is my biggest concern with home schooling. I would be very leery of any child who is "homeschooled" by what I consider to be unqualified adults.. Giving birth to a child does not make you automatically qualified to teach. Being educated does.

    Being a parent may not automatically qualify one to teach their kid, but neither does a college education.

    The parents did the right thing by asking someone to help. Many curricula have handbooks for parents to help them teach their child.

    Of course there are always going to be some bad apples in the bunch, but if a parent is active in the child's education, then the odds are good that the child will benefit.
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
    It sounds like she is in the autistic spectrum. What services is the school offering? By law they have to help.

    My son has had many many emotional problems much like this girl, and at that age it was especially tough.
    If she is like, him, that phase will end soon. My son has many other issues, but that did end.
  • _VoV
    _VoV Posts: 1,494 Member
    I think it really depends.... I made it through public school and turned out pretty well... but my parents supplemented my education at home... plus they are both teachers.. so that helped... I look around at the people I graduated with and a lot of them haven't turned out the way I would have thought they would.. some better... some worse.. I've been with two people that were home schooled... both of them were as intelligent as more... if not more so... but both of them are a lot more socially awkward than me. If I home school... I'm going to make sure my children are involved in plenty of activities outside of the home... this is looking more and more likely unless public schools can get their act together

    This reminded me of a friend of mine from college... she is an introvert by nature and she was taught at home as well... we were talking once about people assuming that we are all socially awkward (not saying that this OP was saying that at all, it's just a common stereotype as we can see here) and that we get no social interaction with our peers... well she was telling me that her mom made them (her sisters were taught at home as well.. and one of her sisters was extroverted and they are as different as night and day) go on field trips, join activities, do all the things (and then some) that kids in traditional schools would do... they all were so tired of going out they would beg to stay home for a while... So honestly, if someone is socially awkward, whose to say they wouldn't have been anyway regardless of where they went to school? (<- rhetorical question not posted towards anyone in particular)

    Haha! There were times of the year, I would over-enroll my home-schooled kids in activities too. They were often so good, they were hard to turn down. But, sometimes we would get so exhausted from 'car school', that we would need to pare back to regain our balance of home-school to outside activities. I can relate.
  • LillysGranny
    LillysGranny Posts: 431
    I think your parents should consider putting your sister in a confidence building activity like martial arts. I've seen kids go from scared to say hello to strong leaders in just a few months! With summer break coming, there might be just enough time for her to feel better about school by the fall. I know children who are receiving excellent educations at home, but I just don't think running away from the world is the best way to learn how to deal with it--which we all must do sooner or later.
  • kaetmarie
    kaetmarie Posts: 668 Member
    Btw, before I leave due to all these posts quite frankly pissing me off... Let me say this to all of the "professionals, psychiatrists, and teachers" who seem to be in absolute disagreement with home school in terms of social awkwardness, mental issues as I believe one person put it, and the ability to handle depression/anxiety. I'm really sorry to say this is such a harsh way and you can flame me all you want, but your degrees mean nothing unless you've experienced it yourself. You can sit there all day and argue psych 101 and the effects on children all you want, but unless you've actually been tormented day by day, experienced anxiety, depression, and tried home school for yourself as a alternative, you have no clue to the ACTUAL effects these things do to you. You're education tells you the most popular theories, methods and reasoning in order to gain a better understanding on human mentality, but the fact stands is that all of that knowledge exists without compassion and true understanding of what the individual experiences. Likewise most of those popular theories stem from small/large group studies done on a certain number of children in each given situation ,so to say that it stands for the majority is most of the time false. Like I said, you wouldn't understand unless you've been there yourself. While I agree the parents will must be strong and they must be prepared at the fullest in order for home school to work as it should with the child, how can you say that statistically the teachers in the US public schools are doing that? From personal experience, 90% of them don't give a rats *kitten* and hardly ever step in to prevent bullying or fooling around etc. Same goes with what some said about mental illness and shi* seriously wtf? I'd like to see some actual statistics that PROVE that home schooled children are more likely to become mentally unstable, and socially awkward than those in public school. And if you want to shoot me these statistics, don't forget to to include the fact that home schooled children make up a much smaller portion of children in the US okay? lol, I'm done, let the flaming begin.

    I am said professional you're mad at. I also had serious anxiety issues when I was a kid/teenager/young adult. In my opinion, your logic can be used against your argument ... because unless you sat in one of my classes or conducted one of my studies, you are unable to say that I don't understand. Furthermore, I know very few people in my field who did not have some kind of negative experience fueling their desire to enter the field ... because truthfully, most people hate us and just based on your reaction and others on here, it's not a field that is FUN to be in a lot of the time.

    I'm not going to speak for teachers, even though I was one briefly, but many parents came to me and yelled about how I didn't know what I was doing becaue I never had a learning disability. Now people get mad when I work with their [autistic, adhd, conduct disorder, bipolar, whatever] child because I never had those disorders. However, would anyone think twice about going to an oncologist who never actually had cancer? There's a reason that college and graduate school exist, because things have been learned and have been SUCCESSFULLY used with kids.

    A personal experience is n=1. That's absolutely useful! I do case studies all the time, but I also do small and larger research studies. While there are a lot of interpersonal differences between children, the truth of the matter is that there are also a lot of similarities. Not every single thing is going to work with every single child, but that's to be expected.

    By the same token, homeschooling is not a one-size-fits-all-save-the-day solution for kids either. Do some kids benefit, absolutely! There are lots of great success stories with homeschooling, but there are also lots of success stories with public education.
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
    I have mixed feelings when it comes to home schooling, especially if it's only done for religious reasons (which is often the case). However, when it might actually truly be the better option for the child and the parents are able to provide an equal or better education than would be received at school, I'm for it. I would just worry about social development and learning how to interact with peers and make friends, so I'd be sure to make an effort to have her around other kids at least occasionally.
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
    My main concern about home schooling is the development of social skills. Not that the social skills kids are learning these days are anything to be proud of. Selfishness seems to be the message of the day. JMO
  • DeckerDoll
    DeckerDoll Posts: 201
    Well, I was home schooled my entire life although I went into dual credit college courses at 16 and phased right into college from there. My brother went to public high school and college from there.

    We're both pretty awesome in my humble opinion =P
  • saffronblue
    saffronblue Posts: 78 Member
    To the original post...did you think you were going to open up such a heated discussion??? I hope your family finds the best path for your sister! I say go for it! Get support, find groups and keep on doing what is right for her!
  • cannonsky
    cannonsky Posts: 850 Member
    Btw, before I leave due to all these posts quite frankly pissing me off... Let me say this to all of the "professionals, psychiatrists, and teachers" who seem to be in absolute disagreement with home school in terms of social awkwardness, mental issues as I believe one person put it, and the ability to handle depression/anxiety. I'm really sorry to say this is such a harsh way and you can flame me all you want, but your degrees mean nothing unless you've experienced it yourself. You can sit there all day and argue psych 101 and the effects on children all you want, but unless you've actually been tormented day by day, experienced anxiety, depression, and tried home school for yourself as a alternative, you have no clue to the ACTUAL effects these things do to you. You're education tells you the most popular theories, methods and reasoning in order to gain a better understanding on human mentality, but the fact stands is that all of that knowledge exists without compassion and true understanding of what the individual experiences. Likewise most of those popular theories stem from small/large group studies done on a certain number of children in each given situation ,so to say that it stands for the majority is most of the time false. Like I said, you wouldn't understand unless you've been there yourself. While I agree the parents will must be strong and they must be prepared at the fullest in order for home school to work as it should with the child, how can you say that statistically the teachers in the US public schools are doing that? From personal experience, 90% of them don't give a rats *kitten* and hardly ever step in to prevent bullying or fooling around etc. Same goes with what some said about mental illness and shi* seriously wtf? I'd like to see some actual statistics that PROVE that home schooled children are more likely to become mentally unstable, and socially awkward than those in public school. And if you want to shoot me these statistics, don't forget to to include the fact that home schooled children make up a much smaller portion of children in the US okay? lol, I'm done, let the flaming begin.

    I am said professional you're mad at. I also had serious anxiety issues when I was a kid/teenager/young adult. In my opinion, your logic can be used against your argument ... because unless you sat in one of my classes or conducted one of my studies, you are unable to say that I don't understand. Furthermore, I know very few people in my field who did not have some kind of negative experience fueling their desire to enter the field ... because truthfully, most people hate us and just based on your reaction and others on here, it's not a field that is FUN to be in a lot of the time.

    I'm not going to speak for teachers, even though I was one briefly, but many parents came to me and yelled about how I didn't know what I was doing becaue I never had a learning disability. Now people get mad when I work with their [autistic, adhd, conduct disorder, bipolar, whatever] child because I never had those disorders. However, would anyone think twice about going to an oncologist who never actually had cancer? There's a reason that college and graduate school exist, because things have been learned and have been SUCCESSFULLY used with kids.

    A personal experience is n=1. That's absolutely useful! I do case studies all the time, but I also do small and larger research studies. While there are a lot of intrapersonal differences between children, the truth of the matter is that there are also a lot of similarities. Not every single thing is going to work with every single child, but that's to be expected.

    By the same token, homeschooling is not a one-size-fits-all-save-the-day solution for kids either. Do some kids benefit, absolutely! There are lots of great success stories with homeschooling, but there are also lots of success stories with public education.

    all of that. minus the "I am a professional that you are mad at" part. I am far from professional
  • kaetmarie
    kaetmarie Posts: 668 Member
    Well, I was home schooled my entire life although I went into dual credit college courses at 16 and phased right into college from there. My brother went to public high school and college from there.

    We're both pretty awesome in my humble opinion =P

    This has been my point all along! It can work well both ways!
  • rjsnau
    rjsnau Posts: 11 Member
    To add my $.02, you really need to be sure you are ready for the commitment and more importantly, that you have the education and skills to be a teacher. My wife is a teacher and let me tell you that there is a lot that they know about child development, how to deal with specific behavior problems, how to relate the material to the kids and many other things that the average person doesn't know. Just being a parent doesn't make you a teacher any more than me having a sink makes me a plumber or owning a car makes me a mechanic. I may be able to fix a sink or a car but the professionals are going to do a better job quicker and more efficiently. If you are going to home school I would highly suggest taking teaching classes and reading books on teaching to educate yourself. This is on top of having a good understanding of all the subjects you are going to be homeschooling.

    So if you are going to do it, do it right.
  • MrsRipdizzle
    MrsRipdizzle Posts: 490 Member
    I haven't read all the responses here but I have seen enough debated in public settings to know that there is a LOT of ignorance on this subject. Due to this ignorance there are many myths that continue to be perpetuated.
    I am a college educated woman (graduated with honors from the University of Michigan - psychology) and I am homeschooling my children (13 and 9 yo). There were several reasons my family chose this route and it works for us. We will continue to do what works for us and when it stops working, we'll reevaluate. My children are far from socially awkward. That is the lamest thing I've heard from people when they talk about homeschooling. "What about socialization?" This shows the ignorance in our society. There is a HUGE homeschooling movement sweeping the nation and every year thousands of families join this often misunderstood way of life.

    Both of my children love homeschooling, probably because they have a kick *kitten* mom who does fun things and talks about everything with them. We use various curricula to learn the material (because both of my children have different learning styles) and a LOT of hands-on work. When out in public, I am always being told how well-behaved, respectful, and friendly they are. Both of my children are starting their own businesses right now - my daughter has her own babysitting services and my son is currently starting up (yes, you may laugh) a poop-scooping business. Again, he's NINE years old. They are driven, learning the value of a dollar, and willing to work....unlike MANY children of this generation who wanted everything handed to them. In order to operate a business - they have to be relational. Socially awkward? Nope.

    My third-grader is learning the same history as my 7th grader (albeit not always as "deep") and knows far more in his subjects than other children of his age in the neighborhood. I'm not comparing him to say he is smarter - just that a lot of times people underestimate what children are capable of understanding and applying. You must think back to the early pioneers and at what age "kids" were handling themselves as adults (remember when 14 year olds were adults?).

    Homeschooling truly isn't all about academics. It's about relationship. Kids are constantly learning...and by spending a fair amount of time with an adult who cares for them deeply and is interested in them personally...they are learning even more than sitting in a public school classroom waiting for all the disturbances to settle before the teacher can proceed. School can be done in three to four hours...versus seven to eight hours in public school.

    I could go on and on about the benefits of homeschooling but that information has probably already been discussed or is easily found by a google search. It's hard for me to think of disadvantages, to be honest, and I've been doing this for a few years. I love having my kids home and every so often I look longingly on that big, yellow bus and when that happens - I declare it a mental health day and we take the day off. Because we CAN. I love the flexibility homeschool offers. We are pretty much done with school here in my home for the year...but school never really "ends" because we find things to do daily to enrich our lives (and I have them do language arts and math a little bit each day to make sure they don't go through summer and forget fundamentals of the previous year's teachings).

    I will say that if you decide to homeschool you really need to get hooked up with a good support system in your area. There will be days in the beginning where you doubt yourself and your abilities and that support system is greatly encouraging and helpful. Also, there are TONS of homeschool groups that meet during the day/week from academic style groups to sports leagues. There are plenty of ways to keep the kids "socializing" with other children their age if this is a concern. I've not had any problems yet. ;)

    There are also plenty of books available at the library to check out that give lots of ideas and things to think about before taking the plunge. From curricula to learning styles to schedules to teaching methods to socialization....homeschooling is more common than many think. :)
  • VegesaurusRex
    VegesaurusRex Posts: 1,018
    I think your parents should consider putting your sister in a confidence building activity like martial arts. I've seen kids go from scared to say hello to strong leaders in just a few months! With summer break coming, there might be just enough time for her to feel better about school by the fall. I know children who are receiving excellent educations at home, but I just don't think running away from the world is the best way to learn how to deal with it--which we all must do sooner or later.

    Agree and disagree.

    My kids and I all have black belts in Shaolin Kempo Karate. I have no doubt it helped their confidence, and the fact that we did this as a family was also important. However, I disagree that homeschooling is "running away from the world." The Karate class is itself an excellent example of how our kids learned about facing the world. Their group classes, by the way, were all homeschoolers and scheduled at a convenient time when public school was in session and there weren't so many students that they couldn't get private attention. Homeschooling also has advantages for taking trips to the seashore after school has started in September, but I digress.
  • gus0124
    gus0124 Posts: 10
    I don't have any ready answers for how to transform the public American education system, just the very beginnings of an approach. I do know that NCLB needs to go. My mother, who teaches 1st grade in an urban school district, and my father, who teaches high school English and German in a rural school district, despise it because it constrains them to the detriment of their students. My other thought is to make it much harder to become a teacher so that only the best and brightest can be in front of the classroom. In Finland, teaching is a high-status profession that pays well and has the same amount of respect (if not more) as the law and medicine because only the absolute best can become teachers (one reason why Finland is kicking America's butt in terms of education). In other words, the standards for becoming a teacher in America must be increased a lot. Lastly, since education is a political issue, we all must become involved with the political process, however dysfunctional it is. Federal and state educational mandates did not appear out of thin air.
  • ArtGeek22
    ArtGeek22 Posts: 1,429 Member
    I have been home schooled all through grade school. I personally 100% think you do get a better education than public school, if your parent is committed. As for the social aspect of it, you will want to find a home school group in your area where she can maybe take a few classes and interact with kids her own age. Also, it is not always for religious reason, many do it because they can focus better at home and that they can go at there own pace. Many of my friends (including myself) are ahead in our schooling because we could go at our own pace.

    If you want more info, please friend me or send me a message :flowerforyou:
  • soniyamas
    soniyamas Posts: 160 Member
    As a certified, licensed school teacher, I am always concerned when parents pull their children out of regular school and say they will be "homeschooling" their child from that point forward. I will share my reasons below:

    1. Qualifications/educational level of parents - Can a parent reach and teach their child the important things that child needs to know? Do they know what "developmentally appropriate" is for their child's age? Are the parents knowledgeable enough about the curriculum to present it in ways the child understands?

    2. Is the curriculum relevant? Is the child learning what should be learned, versus what the parents want that child to learn? (some HS programs offer "revisionist" history, where important truths are conveniently left out - eg, slavery, holocaust, etc) There are certain skill sets/requirements all children MUST know in order to be well rounded adults. Slanted or inaccurate information can negatively affect a child's future.

    3. Is the parent willing to sit by their child, invest the time, and hold their children accountable for their school work? Many parents nowadays have to work, and trusting their young child to stay home and do their school work all on line is a recipe for disaster. My daughter's friend is now being homeschooled (due to bullying) and guess what? This girl only gets 5 hours of weekly school work, which is less than one full day's worth of schooling. In a WEEK.

    4. Schools provide the opportunity for children to learn HOW to get along with others, even if the children are being bullied. Instead of retreating into a "safe" world, it is better to learn how to handle the bullying and work on developing self esteem. Running away from it doesn't build self confidence, it only pushes the real issues aside.

    I hope this provides you with some real information to make a very educated choice. I'm not anti-HS, I am against homeschool programs that end up causing more harm than good. Make sure your child is being monitored on a regular, weekly basis, by qualified school teachers, and is learning STATE curriculum standards. If those criteria are met, then a HS program should be okay overall.


    Agree to all of this ^^^^ .
    My husband want to home school our 2.5 years old boy but I don't, for all the above stated reasons.
  • Look into online schooling for your sister. Most states have online schools now for all ages. It is like the best of both worlds... getting to have real teachers but doing it at home on the computer. However... isolation will be unhealthy for your sister. She needs interaction with peers to develop socially. Her fears and anxiety will not go away by avoidance... whe will need to overcome these things to thrive in the world. Find a homeschool group in your area that she can integrate with. This will give her a small setting in which to develop socially, and help her overcomeher fears.
  • angryguy77
    angryguy77 Posts: 836 Member
    I was homeschooled as well as my two sisters. I totally enjoyed it, wouldn't change a thing. I have not experienced any social problems. I would totally recommend it to anyone.

    I was as well. I went to more dances and proms than my siblings who actually went to public school. I'm also the only one in my family who graduated from college. These concerns are based off of an unfair stereotype.

    There might be some homechooled kids who are socially abnormal, but to make that generalization about all or most homeschoolers is unfair. If we are going to start generalizing, I could say that kids in public school have a greater risk of going crazy and shooting up the place.
  • _VoV
    _VoV Posts: 1,494 Member
    Btw, before I leave due to all these posts quite frankly pissing me off... Let me say this to all of the "professionals, psychiatrists, and teachers" who seem to be in absolute disagreement with home school in terms of social awkwardness, mental issues as I believe one person put it, and the ability to handle depression/anxiety. I'm really sorry to say this is such a harsh way and you can flame me all you want, but your degrees mean nothing unless you've experienced it yourself. You can sit there all day and argue psych 101 and the effects on children all you want, but unless you've actually been tormented day by day, experienced anxiety, depression, and tried home school for yourself as a alternative, you have no clue to the ACTUAL effects these things do to you. You're education tells you the most popular theories, methods and reasoning in order to gain a better understanding on human mentality, but the fact stands is that all of that knowledge exists without compassion and true understanding of what the individual experiences. Likewise most of those popular theories stem from small/large group studies done on a certain number of children in each given situation ,so to say that it stands for the majority is most of the time false. Like I said, you wouldn't understand unless you've been there yourself. While I agree the parents will must be strong and they must be prepared at the fullest in order for home school to work as it should with the child, how can you say that statistically the teachers in the US public schools are doing that? From personal experience, 90% of them don't give a rats *kitten* and hardly ever step in to prevent bullying or fooling around etc. Same goes with what some said about mental illness and shi* seriously wtf? I'd like to see some actual statistics that PROVE that home schooled children are more likely to become mentally unstable, and socially awkward than those in public school. And if you want to shoot me these statistics, don't forget to to include the fact that home schooled children make up a much smaller portion of children in the US okay? lol, I'm done, let the flaming begin.

    I am said professional you're mad at. I also had serious anxiety issues when I was a kid/teenager/young adult. In my opinion, your logic can be used against your argument ... because unless you sat in one of my classes or conducted one of my studies, you are unable to say that I don't understand. Furthermore, I know very few people in my field who did not have some kind of negative experience fueling their desire to enter the field ... because truthfully, most people hate us and just based on your reaction and others on here, it's not a field that is FUN to be in a lot of the time.

    I'm not going to speak for teachers, even though I was one briefly, but many parents came to me and yelled about how I didn't know what I was doing becaue I never had a learning disability. Now people get mad when I work with their [autistic, adhd, conduct disorder, bipolar, whatever] child because I never had those disorders. However, would anyone think twice about going to an oncologist who never actually had cancer? There's a reason that college and graduate school exist, because things have been learned and have been SUCCESSFULLY used with kids.

    A personal experience is n=1. That's absolutely useful! I do case studies all the time, but I also do small and larger research studies. While there are a lot of intrapersonal differences between children, the truth of the matter is that there are also a lot of similarities. Not every single thing is going to work with every single child, but that's to be expected.

    By the same token, homeschooling is not a one-size-fits-all-save-the-day solution for kids either. Do some kids benefit, absolutely! There are lots of great success stories with homeschooling, but there are also lots of success stories with public education.

    I agree with you that you need not experience each person's reality to help him/her. But, on the other hand, reading case studies and the like, while helpful, might inform, as well as distort, your analysis of another case, since each case is unique.

    I also agree there are home-schooling, as well as public schooling success stories, but even with public schooling success stories, many are the result of dedicated parents supporting the education at school and augmenting it.

    Education stems primarily from the home environment in my opinion. And it's important to remember that most states place the responsibility to educate children squarely on the shoulders of parents, empowering them to make the ultimate decisions. It's as it should be.
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    Honestly, I wish I was homeschooled and begged my mom to do it several times. I hated my time in public school, as they don't know how to deal with someone who has Asperger's and kids are especially cruel to people with disabilities. I had a couple teachers help me out and offer support but most of them didn't care if I was being bullied right in front of them because I "deserved it" and it "builds character." If I have a child who is disabled like me, they will NOT be in public schooling, I'd probably put them into a private circuit that caters to special children, if I could afford it.
  • Nerdy_Rose
    Nerdy_Rose Posts: 1,277 Member
    tl;dr.

    I was homschooled, so was my older sister. I am so social I will talk to a brick wall.
    She is not.

    The schooling had nothing to do with it. We're just very different people.

    Anyway, we both turned out fabulously and extremely intelligent. I was homeschooled until I was 14, went to public school (my choice) for one year and got the *kitten* beat out of me for being "different." So, I quit public high school at age 15, and started community college.

    Got my associate's at 18, bachelor's at 21, now I'm 26 and graduating with my master's this Sunday.

    I am still "different" and I like myself this way. I'm thankful I was homeschooled and that my mom supported my "weird" personality.
  • SirBen81
    SirBen81 Posts: 396 Member
    Homeschool + private sport teams/lessons/groups = win

    It's very easy to have a great social life and be homeschooled at the same time. Plus having more control over what your kid is taught is great.
  • dhakiyya
    dhakiyya Posts: 481 Member
    Homeschooling ISN'T for everyone but neither is public schooling. I think parents need to be attentive to their children and instead of saying; she has to learn to deal with life BLAH BLAH BLAH, they should be saying; how do we help HER learn how to deal with life?

    Totally agree. Kids don't learn to "deal with life" by facing abuse, social isolation or completely inappropriate educational activities (too easy or too hard) day in day out. Some kids do better homeschooled or in alternative environments (much smaller classes, different teaching methods etc) while others do better in mainstream schools.
    Public school is not reflective of real life at all. The abuses that go on in public schools would NEVER be allowed outside of school. If your coworker slams your head into a brick wall (happened to my brother), he won't be coming to work the next day... however, when it happened in public school the same boy who physically abused my brother was allowed to continue to come to school and my brother had to deal with being confronted with his abuser every single day. That doesn't happen in real life.

    Public school is great for kids who fit in, but not every kid is going to fit in and being treated like an outcast and bullied will NOT make a child stronger.

    Totally agree with that too. Adults, when faced with bullying or social isolation due to not fitting in, have the option to go and find a new group of friends. If it happens at work, and HR does not deal with it, you can take action against the company, or at the very least leave and get a new job. No-one would advise an adult to stay in a toxic/bullying work environment and "just put up with it" - yet kids are being expected to do that.... and kids are more at risk of psychological damage from it, because they haven't had so much life experience or the ability to rationalise what's going on. They're more likely to internalise it as them being unlikeable or unable to socialise than an adult would. The school environment of being forced to socialise with 30 people who have nothing in common with you besides the area they live in and the academic year they were born in, and not being able to get out of the situation if you don't fit in or are being bullied, is nothing like life after school.