Looking for Feminist Friends
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I'm not sure you fully understand the meaning of the word from what I've gathered from your posts.Whoa, lets not turn this into an attack on feminism, I don't think this thread is the place for that. I'll leave this thread after this comment so as to avoid further issues...
Wait, what's that? You want to hear my views on feminism? Oh, ok.
Personally, whilst I see there was a great need for the feminist uprising (labelled as such), I personally believe that this is an outdated term and just reinforces the mental image of an opressed woman trying desperately to seek independance and equality.
Whilst I grant that this is still a valid plight in many parts of the world, I believe that the majority of users of this forum have cast aside the shackles of male oppression, and indeed have more power than us mere males in many aspects of life. I fully support equal right (including equal pay and opportunities etc) for women and men, but the tag of feminism is counterproductive to the cause in my humble opinion.
There are a number of groups that are not given entirely equal rights in the world, including a range of ethnicities, and people from various religious and socio-ecomonic backgrounds. Surely we should be striving to be at a point in society where 'feminism' in its original sense is no longer relevant, but that we should instead be spruiking 'equal right for all'?
Anyway, my 2c... hopefully I've demonstrated that I'm not some uneducated yokel, and that my comment was meant entirely as humerous and not malicious.
:flowerforyou:
You're right...he forgot passive/aggressive and narrow minded.
Oh...and a definite requirement to have your sense of humor forcibly removed.
LMFAO!!!!0 -
I love reverse discrimination. It's the reason why I got my teaching assistantship
Actually, I don't agree with reverse discrimination at all (or any discrimination for that matter), which is often the outcome of these "movements." Two wrongs don't make a right. LEGIT equality for all plz.
I felt really crummy when I found out I was hired ONLY because I was a women and not based on my credentials.:mad:
Why would you take a job that you were not qualified for? I personally don't hate anyone, including men.
What makes you think I wasn't qualified, hmm ? I was more than qualified, but when I signed my contract they told me, "We needed a girl and your application was the first one we grabbed that fit the bill."
I was a guy they would not have hired me, and I don't think that's right.0 -
I actually came into this thread as I believed myself to be a feminist. I served in the army for 7 years in Iraq and Afghan, and now work as a Construction Manager. I've fought for equality and been paid the same, if not more, than my male colleagues for the last 10 years (my WHOLE working life!) and been promoted above and beyond them in many instances. I'm independent, was educated at Oxford, am currently studying for my second degree and earn bloody good money for bossing men about all day and instructing them on how to build things. I've been widowed since my husband and daughter died when I was 21 and have accomplished everything I've done in my life as a single parent to my step-son. If none of that makes me strong and capable, I don't know what does.
However, this thread has changed my mind. Yes, the women who initiated the fight for women's rights changed our lives for the better but all of you who still seem to think you're "fighting the war" just sound ridiculous. Maybe people should concentrate on themselves more instead of making up stupid needless groups to "support" them - if feminism is the fight for freedom for women, rest assured, mission has been accomplished - it couldn't get much better than this. Personally, all your moaning and griping makes you sound like victims and not very strong at all!
Or maybe I just don't have a clue what your definition of feminism is?
P. S. Feminist or not, I like my friends to come with a good sense of humour and an ability to banter so don't worry, I won't be adding most of the people in this thread
And for the record, I thought some of Cris' and Rayman79's comments were friggin hilarious! 0 -
I double this statementFeminist here. I don't believe in society created gender roles and everyone should be treated equal and with respect. We are all humans with desires, dreams and goals and should not be treated any less because of a sex we are.0 -
I actually came into this thread as I believed myself to be a feminist. I served in the army for 7 years in Iraq and Afghan, and now work as a Construction Manager. I've fought for equality and been paid the same, if not more, than my male colleagues for the last 10 years (my WHOLE working life!) and been promoted above and beyond them in many instances. I'm independent, was educated at Oxford, am currently studying for my second degree and earn bloody good money for bossing men about all day and instructing them on how to build things. I've been widowed since my husband and daughter died when I was 21 and have accomplished everything I've done in my life as a single parent to my step-son. If none of that makes me strong and capable, I don't know what does.
However, this thread has changed my mind. Yes, the women who initiated the fight for women's rights changed our lives for the better but all of you who still seem to think you're "fighting the war" just sound ridiculous. Maybe people should concentrate on themselves more instead of making up stupid needless groups to "support" them - if feminism is the fight for freedom for women, rest assured, mission has been accomplished - it couldn't get much better than this. Personally, all your moaning and griping makes you sound like victims and not very strong at all!
Or maybe I just don't have a clue what your definition of feminism is?
P. S. Feminist or not, I like my friends to come with a good sense of humour and an ability to banter so don't worry, I won't be adding most of the people in this thread And for the record, I thought some of Cris' and Rayman79's comments were friggin hilarious!
Nicely put.0 -
I love feminists! No-one does dishes and laundry as well as a feminist!! :laugh:
Hahahaha
I think your funny!0 -
I was going to major in gender studies back in college, but then I realized that I actually had to support myself after I graduated by getting a job, so I majored in engineering. I realized that, since I am a man, I couldn't get a worthless, self-aggrandizing degree like Gender Studies because I couldn't count on the patriarchy to support me, i.e. I couldn't count on finding a rich woman to marry and become a house-husband. So I majored in Engineering. My wife has a degree in womens issues though, so I still support you feminists though! Keep up the good work.
Ha! I realized the same thing. I've always had a very strong sense that the only person who can and will take care of me, is me. So I decided not to major in English (I'm not the teacher or the writer type), considered engineering but couldn't see myself at a computer all day, and became a physical therapist instead. What's funny is that I started as an athletic trainer, which is a male dominated field then went to PT school where my class was 45 women and 5 guys. I supported my ex-husband through his PhD, got divorced and split things fairly (just stuff, no cash pay out) and I work to support myself, take care of my house and have fun in the process.
I don't label myself. I think women and men should have equal opportunity and should be evaluated on an individual basis for their achievements. I feel the same ray about all races, religions, political and sexual orientations. It would bother me to know I was hired or promoted over anyone because of my gender or race, just as it would bother me to know that I wasn't considered for a position due to my gender or race. Hey, maybe I'm just a PERSON-ist!
I'm kinda sucky at laundry and dishes because I don't really like to do them, but I get them done... along with the yard work, vehicle maintenance and a lot of basic repairs about the house. If I can't handle it, I pay someone to do it.
I surround myself with people who are supportive of me and who I can support back. Period. No BS or underhanded motives or oppression or taking advantage of anyone.
If you look at the original post, she was just looking for a forum that was supportive and not bashing of anything. I'm not surprised it blew up to 12 pages of comments in 2 days. I think some of the sarcastic comments are funny, but I also think that the people who posted them had to know they'd get a backlash. I mean... if you're joking, say you're joking... don't expect people to read your mind ;-p Sarcasm is not that obvious in black and white text. That's what the emoticons are for :happy:
:flowerforyou:
May peace, and the Force be with you all Go forth and prosper, or procreate, or whatever you feel is right and try not to run into each other too hard... it's all fun and games until someone gets hurt 0 -
I actually came into this thread as I believed myself to be a feminist. I served in the army for 7 years in Iraq and Afghan, and now work as a Construction Manager. I've fought for equality and been paid the same, if not more, than my male colleagues for the last 10 years (my WHOLE working life!) and been promoted above and beyond them in many instances. I'm independent, was educated at Oxford, am currently studying for my second degree and earn bloody good money for bossing men about all day and instructing them on how to build things. I've been widowed since my husband and daughter died when I was 21 and have accomplished everything I've done in my life as a single parent to my step-son. If none of that makes me strong and capable, I don't know what does.
However, this thread has changed my mind. Yes, the women who initiated the fight for women's rights changed our lives for the better but all of you who still seem to think you're "fighting the war" just sound ridiculous. Maybe people should concentrate on themselves more instead of making up stupid needless groups to "support" them - if feminism is the fight for freedom for women, rest assured, mission has been accomplished - it couldn't get much better than this. Personally, all your moaning and griping makes you sound like victims and not very strong at all!
Or maybe I just don't have a clue what your definition of feminism is?
P. S. Feminist or not, I like my friends to come with a good sense of humour and an ability to banter so don't worry, I won't be adding most of the people in this thread And for the record, I thought some of Cris' and Rayman79's comments were friggin hilarious!
Nicely put.
Agreed.0 -
I actually came into this thread as I believed myself to be a feminist. I served in the army for 7 years in Iraq and Afghan, and now work as a Construction Manager. I've fought for equality and been paid the same, if not more, than my male colleagues for the last 10 years (my WHOLE working life!) and been promoted above and beyond them in many instances. I'm independent, was educated at Oxford, am currently studying for my second degree and earn bloody good money for bossing men about all day and instructing them on how to build things. I've been widowed since my husband and daughter died when I was 21 and have accomplished everything I've done in my life as a single parent to my step-son. If none of that makes me strong and capable, I don't know what does.
However, this thread has changed my mind. Yes, the women who initiated the fight for women's rights changed our lives for the better but all of you who still seem to think you're "fighting the war" just sound ridiculous. Maybe people should concentrate on themselves more instead of making up stupid needless groups to "support" them - if feminism is the fight for freedom for women, rest assured, mission has been accomplished - it couldn't get much better than this. Personally, all your moaning and griping makes you sound like victims and not very strong at all!
Or maybe I just don't have a clue what your definition of feminism is?
P. S. Feminist or not, I like my friends to come with a good sense of humour and an ability to banter so don't worry, I won't be adding most of the people in this thread And for the record, I thought some of Cris' and Rayman79's comments were friggin hilarious!
You, my dear, are the very definition of a strong woman. :flowerforyou:0 -
THANK YOU FOR STARTNG THIS! Excellent / interesting dialog.0
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I'm so in! I'm definitely a feminist, and feel that I struggle with the same issues. I want to be thin mostly to look a certain way and to feel sexy, but I also know that this is a socially constructed self hate. It drives me nuts! I want to be one of those women who doesn't care and feels amazing about her lumps and bumps, but I don't. Ugh.
Anyways, happy you created the thread! Maybe this is the start of a new way of thinking!0 -
how about the fact that women who hold the exact same jobs as men don't get paid as much as their male counterparts?
Well, it's not a fact.
When controlled for a particular job plus hours worked, women make the same. If it was a fact, then employers would only hire women since they're cheaper for the "exact same work".
It's only unequal when you aggregate them up in to blocks, and fail to correct for type of job (e.g., risky jobs that pay well, like oil-rig workers) and hours worked. Yes, then women make less. Because they choose to work less and take on less risky jobs. I fully support a woman's right to choose less risky jobs, or more risky jobs, to work less hours, or to work more hours! Men, too. Freedom is a wonderful thing.0 -
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how about the fact that women who hold the exact same jobs as men don't get paid as much as their male counterparts?
Well, it's not a fact.
When controlled for a particular job plus hours worked, women make the same. If it was a fact, then employers would only hire women since they're cheaper for the "exact same work".
It's only unequal when you aggregate them up in to blocks, and fail to correct for type of job (e.g., risky jobs that pay well, like oil-rig workers) and hours worked. Yes, then women make less. Because they choose to work less and take on less risky jobs.
Sorry to hijack your post saxmaniac! I couldn't find the original post that you quoted from!
I'm a woman. I'm 28. I've served in the army. I work in a managerial position in the construction/civil engineering industry which includes some rig work. I've never been paid less than anyone I've worked with in the same position as me. I've been promoted above and beyond others who've been doing the same job as me for years longer.
In summary, I agree with saxmaniac 0 -
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. PS Don't ya hate it when people copy and paste something like they wrote it?
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if you are talking to me sweetheart i wonted to show the real meaning of feminism and why it was started long before you were born. Is there a rule that says do not copy and paste, no, did i actually say i wrote it no.
We are all on this site for one thing, not to prove we are fem girly girls or macho men who cares who does the ironing who cleans the toilet , we are here to fight the excess weight and become fitter people. I personally think *****ing at other members is a negative were as we need to be positive in this to be were we all wont to end up.
Like me or hate me whatever. but if you have something to really ***** about i hope its more than my posting an answer to a question in the best way i could,0 -
I am extremely progressive to the point of not being able to live without alternative friends and lifestyle. I'd love to be a support for you and you for me.
Don't let the jealous ones get you down. They would love to be progressive but the fear of outcast is bigger for them than having an open mind.0 -
I am extremely progressive to the point of not being able to live without alternative friends and lifestyle. I'd love to be a support for you and you for me.
Don't let the jealous ones get you down. They would love to be progressive but the fear of outcast is bigger for them than having an open mind.
That's exactly it. It couldn't possibly be that <gasp> different people have legitimately different opinions?????0 -
My mother taught me that "well behaved women rarely make history." Follow it every day. Feel free to add me for support!0
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If you believe women should have equal rights with men, you are, by definition, a feminist. Haven't we gone over this before?0
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Same here. Some of the comments are revolting, especially when it comes to the topic of women's bodies. I'm sending you a friend request 0
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I am extremely progressive to the point of not being able to live without alternative friends and lifestyle. I'd love to be a support for you and you for me.
Don't let the jealous ones get you down. They would love to be progressive but the fear of outcast is bigger for them than having an open mind.
Love this. All about the positive support and so NOT about hating on people who don't fit into their restrictive little boxes. Feel free to add me for support too.0 -
Same here. Some of the comments are revolting, especially when it comes to the topic of women's bodies. I'm sending you a friend request 0
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(don't do it, don't do it!!!)
Okay-- I'm doing it anyway-- gonna ignore that still, small voice--
Gentlemen-- you have cracked me up. I totally love how "women" have somehow vaulted themselves in a protected class-- you can't tease us. You can't say anything bad about us.
But you, guys? You're fair game.
Not.
Personally, I don't have a feminist bone in my body. I'm a happy, healthy, submissive Christian wife and mother of 9 children.
GASP!!!!
You mean I don't get my "fulfillment" outside the home? Uh, nope. Fulfillment comes from doing the job God called me to do-- helper to my husband, mother to my children-- I even homeschool 'em, to boot.
I hope you have found what you're looking for OP-- I think feminism has hurt "us," meaning women, and have definitely hurt our children as more and more of "us" seek work outside the home, and dump our kids for someone else to raise. But if you find comfort in that, God bless you.
My very controversial two cents.0 -
Same here. Some of the comments are revolting, especially when it comes to the topic of women's bodies and roles in relationships. This seems to be a very pro-patriarchy site with a lot of anti-feminist women. I'm sending you a friend request 0
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I love feminists! No-one does dishes and laundry as well as a feminist!!
NOT FUNNY
If you can't see thae sarcasm and (intended) humour in my post, then I genuinely feel sorry for you.
I think it's funny and I'm a woman! Am I a feminist? Doubt it. I do think that women should get paid the same amount for the same job that a man does- which sometimes isn't the case- but that's about as far as I go.
When we get married...if my fiance ever says...honey, you just stay home with the kids and don't work. I'll DEFINITELY be taking him up on that! haha!0 -
how about the fact that women who hold the exact same jobs as men don't get paid as much as their male counterparts?
Well, it's not a fact.
When controlled for a particular job plus hours worked, women make the same. If it was a fact, then employers would only hire women since they're cheaper for the "exact same work".
It's only unequal when you aggregate them up in to blocks, and fail to correct for type of job (e.g., risky jobs that pay well, like oil-rig workers) and hours worked. Yes, then women make less. Because they choose to work less and take on less risky jobs.
Sorry to hijack your post saxmaniac! I couldn't find the original post that you quoted from!
I'm a woman. I'm 28. I've served in the army. I work in a managerial position in the construction/civil engineering industry which includes some rig work. I've never been paid less than anyone I've worked with in the same position as me. I've been promoted above and beyond others who've been doing the same job as me for years longer.
In summary, I agree with saxmaniac
Exactly, that argument started losing it's hold over 20 years ago. I was a young girl when I first started hearing about women breaking through the glass ceiling. Now, my friends have gotten their degrees to fill positions in the oil industry. Why? Because the pay is the same. Even entry level safety jobs pay the same for men and women.
The birth control argument doesn't hold water either. Condoms and spermicide are available otc. Don't care for artificial birth control? Learn NFP, people have used it successfully for years. There is nothing more empowering than learning how your body works and controlling it, hence all this fitness stuff on this fitness site.
You want to fight for rights, then fight for those weaker than you. Women who are truly oppressed. Young girls forced to marry old men and used as objects or status. Women who are actually told what to wear. Girls subjected to genital mutilation. Women beaten and killed for voicing opinions or daring to disagree with the men in their lives. <~~~ these are not problems "we" face in this country, though. Bring solutions to real problems to the table.0 -
I believe in staying home and taking care of my family. If push comes to shov,e I will go back to work. I resent comments from people who say things like "Is that ALL you do?" I like to look good because I am very vain. I like hearing compliments, mostly I get them from men. The most criticism and anger I have ever faced has always come from other women. My male friends and acquaintances have been much kinder and more supportive. On the whole I've noticed that women just bring each other down unfortunately. I'm not sure what that makes me in terms of feminism. I wish all women in the world felt empowered and loved, and loved themselves.0
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I wouldn't want my great sandwich making skills to go to waste. 0
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I agree with you on the boards, its all about body fat % and whats hot and whats not. Im married and my husband loves me and I dont care what ANYONE thinks I should look like...Im striving to be the best me...fit and strong! I dont care about wearing a bikini this summer, even when i was skinny I didnt, im pale and always been a modest girl. Im am a realist and and yes Im a Christian , no I cant stand dirty talk! Ill send you a request....0
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(don't do it, don't do it!!!)
Okay-- I'm doing it anyway-- gonna ignore that still, small voice--
Gentlemen-- you have cracked me up. I totally love how "women" have somehow vaulted themselves in a protected class-- you can't tease us. You can't say anything bad about us.
But you, guys? You're fair game.
Not.
Personally, I don't have a feminist bone in my body. I'm a happy, healthy, submissive Christian wife and mother of 9 children.
GASP!!!!
You mean I don't get my "fulfillment" outside the home? Uh, nope. Fulfillment comes from doing the job God called me to do-- helper to my husband, mother to my children-- I even homeschool 'em, to boot.
I hope you have found what you're looking for OP-- I think feminism has hurt "us," meaning women, and have definitely hurt our children as more and more of "us" seek work outside the home, and dump our kids for someone else to raise. But if you find comfort in that, God bless you.
My very controversial two cents.
My point exactly, in my first post. I think we must be kindred spirits! :flowerforyou:0
This discussion has been closed.
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