The most annoying 'compliment'?

changeofideas

mine was "you dont look too bad considering youve had a child..."

ugh worse one for me too. i mean really it should be a compliment because having a baby really does change everything about the body but... id prefer it to be less noticeable

amkelley

mine was "you dont look too bad considering youve had a child..."

I have had 3 kids in 3 years and everyone says I look great for having 3 kids in 3 years....I dont want to look great for having 3 kids in 3 years people- I just want to look great!! Thank you very much!!!

Burlesque12

So what is the appropriate way to compliment someone who has lost weight? Whether or not I am at my goal, I am happy when it is noticed. Just take the compliment and dont analyze it. Its motivating and means whatever your doing is working! Let the snyde compliments go in one ear and out the other.

xdaysbingefree

Bump! I want to read this later

Gyoza11

Not really a compliment, my friend keeps saying how I was never fat to begin with and don't need to lose weight. Yes I was/am!!

bellyake3

The most annoying compliment I've gotten was the one before the BUT.."You are looking great BUT!!!"........ AAARRRGG!

reserge

I hate the "skinny mini" comments. They make me feel really uncomfortable. I am not skinny, nor will I ever be. I am big boned and muscular and still 10kg over a healthy BMI. And it is always smaller people who say this.

I have been told I shouldn't lose anymore as I am gaunt in the shoulderblades/sternum area. Too bad my *kitten* and guts are still fat!

One aquaintance who is the same size as I used to be, always says something like "Oh you are still losing weight, you lucky b*tch". I find this so offensive. The first time she said it I snapped back with "More like I am still running at least 5k every 2nd day and DESERVE to lose weight". That shut her up that time, but she still says it everytime she sees me.

But she is the same person who asks me how have lost the weight then when I tell her about Couch to 5k she says "oh I could never run" in a relieved voice, as if she is happy I did something she couldn't do so she doesn't have to try. When I reply "Oh but I couldn't run either until C25K" she just dismisses me. It is as if she wants me to say "Oh, to lose weight I just ate whatever I wanted and did no exercise but bathed in a bath of chocolate milk everynight and it just melted away!" Sorry babe, it takes hard work, not LUCK!

dasblondie

Not a compliment, but because I'm not overweight people ask me why I log my food and count calories..

It can get annoying when they don't understand that I need to be aware of what's going into my body and that if I don't keep track I'll eat everything and become overweight. :P

^
This....oh what are you afraid to gain a pound??? or......You are obsessive.....No...i just want to know what im eatting

DOElston

"You've lost a ton of weight"!

Contrary to their observation, I never weighed over 2000 lbs nor do I think I looked like I did. I also agree about loathing the "pretty face" line, as well.

maparapa22

"you look great" but it's with a condescending voice tone and they look you up and down. Not cool.

katenmills

This thread is... frustrating/confusing. You say, "you're looking great!" to someone and they get offended, thinking that you didn't think they looked great before. well, sorry to be blunt, but did YOU think you looked the best you could before? surely it's part of the reason you decided to lose the weight? Or you say "hey, did you lose weight?", wanting to acknowledge their success, and they get annoyed and think to themselves something sarcastic like "naaaaaaaaah, guess it just decided to up and leave!?" BUT, if you take what has evidently become the safest route and say nothing - don't compliment them/acknowledge their weightloss at all - they get angry and discouraged that nobody's said anything. i've literally seen a forum topic where the OP was asking "when are people gonna start noticing!"

why can't people start taking compliments for their face value, there's almost never any secret malice behind it. stop analysing them to death. each person reacts to compliments differently and it's a sensitive subject so cut the complimenter some slack.

deez2015

"wow, you've lost a lot of weight...divorce will do that to ya"....uh NO! i busted my butt to lose the weight, losing him was a bonus :laugh:

Natp274

"You're so fit I hate you" this from a friend who's slimmer than me
"You should do more of ..." suddenly EVERYONE is a personal trainer

prettyxpetite

"Wow that dress looks so much better on you now!"

Oh so I looked bad in it before? Thanks for letting me know

aamb

we have very dear friends who are 'feeders' they could do with joining me on here, but it all seems too much for them lol, anyway, they were staying at the weekend and they had the breakfast my hubbie made.... a good old scottish fry up, i had my usual fruit and yogurt. we are going on holiday soon with these folks and they know how much i have lost, and when i sed i would like to lose another 7lbs before holidays, but seemed to be stuck, he sed.... 'maybe you have reached your optimum weight'....BAH, i need to lose at least another 18lbs to be anything near that!!!

tuesgirl1031

I get all the time, "You look fine the way you are". At this point in my long struggle, Im not really looking for compliments. Right now Im looking for "Way to go" when I have lost a little, or "Good job" when I worked out.

wookiemouse

Anything that has the word "lucky" in it. You're so lucky to lose weight! You're so lucky to be able to wear a size smaller! Really? Completely cleaning up my diet, no refined sugar, no eating out, working out for an hour a day 3x a week, and counting calories daily ISN'T "luck."

prism6

Hw about..Wow,you look sooo much better now.

TheFitHooker

This thread is... frustrating/confusing. You say, "you're looking great!" to someone and they get offended, thinking that you didn't think they looked great before. well, sorry to be blunt, but did YOU think you looked the best you could before? surely it's part of the reason you decided to lose the weight? Or you say "hey, did you lose weight?", wanting to acknowledge their success, and they get annoyed and think to themselves something sarcastic like "naaaaaaaaah, guess it just decided to up and leave!?" BUT, if you take what has evidently become the safest route and say nothing - don't compliment them/acknowledge their weightloss at all - they get angry and discouraged that nobody's said anything. i've literally seen a forum topic where the OP was asking "when are people gonna start noticing!"

why can't people start taking compliments for their face value, there's almost never any secret malice behind it. stop analysing them to death. each person reacts to compliments differently and it's a sensitive subject so cut the complimenter some slack.

So is it ok for someone to tell someone else they look like a porn star? When you know they did not mean it as a compliment? Is it ok for someone to tell you to stop losing weight because you are melting away when you are not even in the healthy range yet? Is it ok for people to tell a person who is over weight to stop eating because they are to fat? How about this one, is it ok for someone to tell you "Oh you quit smoking, and now you're fat"? It's not ok to make comments on people's weight even if they are thin and you are giving them a "Compliment" and think it'll make them feel good by saying "You're melting away" or "You are looking to thin" because truth be told I look to thin to those who know me because they never seen me thin before. I enjoy the compliments that sound like this, "Your hard work has paid off, you look great". However the "OMG! You are looking sick, you need to go shove a hamburger down your throat, maybe a few of them?" Those are rude.

ajball90

you have such a pretty face!

This!

xxTAMxx

"Ooooooh! You've lost all your *kitten*!"

SashaMegan

After a weight loss: "you'velost weight!! I can see it from your face,it's thinner!" :sick:


Okay...Thanks... my *kitten* appreciates!! :huh:

Princess4u324k

Ugh I HATE this one!!!

Every time I have ever mentioned trying to lose a little weight to any of my guy friends they say that I am "hotter" being a "curvy" girl...

yeah...maybe they like curvy girls...but being over 200lbs at only 5'3" is not healthy.
and with my body shape even if I were to get down to a healthy weight again I still have curves...they are just smaller :-P and I would feel better about myself...and would have more energy to play with my baby. :-)

katenmills

This thread is... frustrating/confusing. You say, "you're looking great!" to someone and they get offended, thinking that you didn't think they looked great before. well, sorry to be blunt, but did YOU think you looked the best you could before? surely it's part of the reason you decided to lose the weight? Or you say "hey, did you lose weight?", wanting to acknowledge their success, and they get annoyed and think to themselves something sarcastic like "naaaaaaaaah, guess it just decided to up and leave!?" BUT, if you take what has evidently become the safest route and say nothing - don't compliment them/acknowledge their weightloss at all - they get angry and discouraged that nobody's said anything. i've literally seen a forum topic where the OP was asking "when are people gonna start noticing!"

why can't people start taking compliments for their face value, there's almost never any secret malice behind it. stop analysing them to death. each person reacts to compliments differently and it's a sensitive subject so cut the complimenter some slack.

So is it ok for someone to tell someone else they look like a porn star? When you know they did not mean it as a compliment? Is it ok for someone to tell you to stop losing weight because you are melting away when you are not even in the healthy range yet? Is it ok for people to tell a person who is over weight to stop eating because they are to fat? How about this one, is it ok for someone to tell you "Oh you quit smoking, and now you're fat"? It's not ok to make comments on people's weight even if they are thin and you are giving them a "Compliment" and think it'll make them feel good by saying "You're melting away" or "You are looking to thin" because truth be told I look to thin to those who know me because they never seen me thin before. I enjoy the compliments that sound like this, "Your hard work has paid off, you look great". However the "OMG! You are looking sick, you need to go shove a hamburger down your throat, maybe a few of them?" Those are rude.

er... what? I was specifically addressing the two example compliments that I gave (they have been popular answers in this thread) and how if somebody says either of THOSE TWO to you, i'm sure there's rarely hidden malice behind them. I was not generalising every comment anyone has ever made about you in the history of your life. Soz you got called a porn star.

Sb65513n

I got "You have a waist now....." I'm sorry I had one before!

ronanoo

My aunt said '3 stone nearly? sure you won't be losing anymore' 20 stone down to nearly 17st.

When i feel fit, happy in myself and can wear decent clothes, then i will stop!

kneeki

"How is roid rage treating you?"

Makes me die a little every time.

Jodieh75

Good topic, I have a few of these. . . When I lost a bunch of weight before it drove me nuts when people would tell me I lost weight, not compliment me or ask if I have they would just say "hey you've lost weight" like it happened behind my back when I wasn't looking, I never know what to say back. Also when people start telling you where they can see it and analysing your body like, "hey you've lost weight haven't you, you can really see it in your face," etc. These are usually the same people who chow down fried noodles for lunch and like to tell me what the best diet plans are. The absolute worst, and I know it is meant to be nice, but when someone says "hey you've lost weight, you look good," like I just looked awful before. That one always makes me chuckle.

This exactly! I also don't know how best to respond to the "You've lost weight" statement. I usually just go with "Yes I have". I mean, they haven't given me a compliment so saying thank you would sound wrong!

And telling me not to lose anymore. I'm not even in the healthy BMI weight yet, 4 more kgs to go till then. I think they might be jealous.

2kidzlater

how about when you gain weight and people say you look like you lost weight.

LiddyBit

"Careful, you don't want to lose your boobs or butt!"

Um, yes, I do. Not everyone aspires to look like a Kardashian.