Highest weight how you felt

megsi474

My highest weight was during pregnancy but I count it because I gained an unhealthy 65 pounds by never meeting the left side of a menu I didn't like. I overate horribly and weighed 209 pounds at my last appointment. My stomach was so big I had to stand backwards on the scale. I didn't learn from it and gained 58 pounds with the second baby and it took a while to get down from 170 post partum. My standard "over" weight has been 150 pounds. I'm 20 less than that now and would like to tone up and lose the last 5.

Knowing I ate myself into a bad situation more than once was hard to accept. It made me realize that my willpower was nil and my food vs. fuel needs were out of whack.

drkuhl2017

My highest was 315 at 5'11, just 8 months ago. Thankfully because of my height I did not look that big. When my mom found out how much I weigh, she was amazed that I weighed that much.

I was "happy", at least that's what I let people believe. I wasn't ever antisocial or anything like that, I still went out with my friends and did things. But I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't a little depressed. One thing that I felt most days was unloved and unworthy of love. I always felt somewhat out of place and very fat. Mostly because I've been overweight my entire life, but like I said it wasn't as noticeable because of my height. My clothing size just kept getting larger and larger, my highest was a size 24 pants! I never want to see that number again. And I will never see 300 or higher on the scale again.

Now I've lost 21 pounds, I have a ton more to lose but I feel so much better than I did then! It's actually amazing how much my confidence and self-esteem level has gone up after losing some weight. And I've gained a love for exercise and I feel really weird if I don't get some sort of exercise in each day. Most importantly, I've realized that I am worthy of love but no one will love me romantically until I love myself. And I'm getting a little better at that every day.

ashnm88

My highest weight was 220lbs, and was in physical pain due to arthritis. Now at 137/139lbs I feel great

LovinLife68

My highest weight was 318 pounds. I could not believe that I allowed myself to get so heavy over the years, after being underweight during high school which was 123 pounds. Congrats on your weight loss success thus far. I would love to just lose 5 pounds right now. I start off well in the mornings, but by mid afternoon all my efforts seem to go out the window. I will continue to track and exercise regardless.

spaingirl2011

My highest weight was 168-- on my body, I looked terrible and I felt terrible and you know it's bad when you say "God, I feel fat." and your own mother no longer corrects you.

I'm getting there with my weight and I certainly feel like I look fitter. I will not do that to my body ever again, though!

KittieLea

My highest weight was 170 lbs...and I've been told "that's not that overweight" or "well you've never REALLY been fat" but to me, on my frame, that was when I felt like I was out of control. I am 5'3" and have a very small frame. When I saw that number on the scale I was horrified and I thought "How did I let it get this bad??" I gained a lot of weight while pregnant (went from about 125 to 190!) and then just never really did much to lose it afterward. I went down to about 150 for a while then slowly it crept back up to 170 this past winter and I just felt so embarrassed and ashamed of myself.

I'm SO thankful for MFP, because without this site I'd probably still be that person. ETA: Today, I'm so proud of my accomplishments and have actually learned to appreciate my own hard work. While I'm not at my goal yet, I can honestly say I've begun to love my body again.

My highest was 170 also and I'm only 5'2''! I was in disbelief when I saw this number on the scale, complete denial! I told my mom that her brand new scale was faulty!
At that weight people told me I "carried my weight well" or I was "never really that big". 5'2'' and 170 pounds is considered obese and I won't argue with that!

byrnet18

At my heaviest I was 232 lbs and I felt ugly and tired. I never really wanted to do anything and I can't believe all that I was missing out on. Now 80 pounds lighter I feel like a whole new woman!!

AmberCHM

My highest weight was 286 and I had no idea I was as large as I was. I knew I wasn't happy with my size at that weight, but I was kind of oblivious to just how big I was. I have a great deal of sadness now when I see pictures of myself from that time.

thesarahsundae

At my heaviest weight I was 287 pounds. In all honesty, I didn’t feel ashamed of myself. I wasn’t depressed or upset or any of those things. I had a boyfriend (who became my fiancé and who is now my husband) who loved me and told me I was beautiful. I wasn’t lazy. I worked a full time job and was on my feet for 40+ hours a week. I was just eating horrible things. I ate fast food for EVERY meal. And drank a lot of soda.

NOW I am happy, even if I am not at the goal weight I want to be. I am active, have more energy and enjoy life a lot more. I didn’t realize how tired I was, and how miserable I was until I took control of my life.

LovinLife68

This is a great question and I really needed to be asked this! At my highest weight (152, Im 5'2), I felt so self conscious and insecure. I felt embarrassed of my appearance and I never wanted to go out anywhere. My "fat" clothes werent fitting me anymore and I was left only able to wear loose t-shirts and one pair of jeans. I felt tired and had no energy. The thing that topped it off and made me want to lose weight was when me and my husband were being intimate, I felt so out of breath and tired that it wasnt even enjoyable for me. And my husband is in great shape and has a nice body, so I felt bad that he had to be with somebody like me. Ouch! Its kinda hard to remember those days! But what a great reminder of why I am trying to be healthier and in shape. :happy:

This is where I am right now, except I am 5'11 and I am married to a man who is in pretty good shape as well.. Thank you for sharing. :happy:

karawilliamson

I loved taking pictures of myself and looking beautiful, dressing up and going out with friend when I was at a smaller weight....
When I gained all the weight, I didnt care about myself, I rarely took photos, and when I was in a photo I wanted to puke. I guess my brain still thought I was skinny, until I looked at a photo. I hardly went out and never dressed up. All my clothes are in boxes...I take one out and try it on hoping I can fit into again oneday.

This is exactly how I feel. I am not happy about it. I am lethargic and depressed. I am currently at my highest weight ever- 166 pounds (I'm 5'6). I joined MFP today in hopes of taking back control. My goal weight is 138 pounds...what I weighed when I graduated from high school (10 years ago).

speediejane

Disgusting, fat, ugly, ashamed, tired ..

nessa786

My highest was 335. That was a month ago. I was doing really good on here then quit for 3 weeks and gained 15 lbs. When I stepped on the scale and seen those numbers, I wanted to cry. So I had to get back on the wagon. Today I weighed in at 324.6. I know that is only 10 lbs, but slow and steady wins the race! (but i do wish i could lose faster lol)

pants77

Maximum density for me was about 350 (I'm 6 feet tall fyi). I don't know for sure because none of my scales went up that high...

I felt like I was wearing a deep sea diving suit out of water.
I'd get home from my very sedentary desk job and have to take a nap just because I'd been awake for 10 hours.
I wore the biggest clothes I could find because I thought it "hid" the fat better.
I researched car seat hip room when I was car shopping because it was the first thing I had to take into consideration.

I'm around 235 now and that feels way better than 350. I still have work to do but I can do normal everyday things and not get all sweaty or rundown now. Part of it is the physical presence of the weight dragging you down, and part of it is the effect of the horrible stuff you eat that makes you get to that weight in the first place. I usually feel good now - I only feel like crap after I eat crappy food. I never made this connection before because I always felt like crap.

Namaste1983

AT 430 POUNDS I HID BEHIND PEOPLE IN PHOTOS AND ONLY USED THE STANDARD ABOVE HEAD PHOTO ANGLE. I WAS IN COMPLETE SIZE DENIAL. I KNEW I WAS BIG. FFS IT TOOK YOGA POSES FOR ME TO WIPE MY A** AND I HAD TO USE THE HANDICAPPED STALL. I COULD BARELY FIT IN MY LITTLE DATSUN TRUCK WITH THE BENCH SEAT AND MY STEERING WHEEL DUG INTO MY BELLY. SO WHILE I WASN'T HAPPY, I ALSO WASN'T REALLY AWARE OF HOW FAT I WAS. MY SCALE STOPPED AT 350 AND I DIDN'T KNOW MY WEIGHT UNTIL I WAS ON THE SURGERY TABLE.

NOW I FEEL BEAUTIFUL.... AND SOMETIMES FATTER THAN I EVER WAS.

psychofantasy

I'm 6'2" and my highest weight was around 350. I. Felt. Awful. Physically, I was tired ALL the time - completely lethargic. I work in retail, and I would come home, sit on the couch, and not be able to get back up for like a half hour or more because of back pain and stiff joints. Right now, I'm still in the low 300s, so I still have some of those problems, but now that I'm eating healthier, I have much more energy.

new318

My highest is 250. I am now at 243.0. I felt fearful. I was honestly waiting for a heart attack, blood clot, diabeticshock, something bad to kick in and happen, but I used that fear to turn it around. I started on Tuesday morning and am down what I think its 7 pounds. Just burn 400 cal a day and stay under cal intake suggestion!

MinnieInMaine

My highest weight was 260. Wish I could say the number on the scale was my wake-up call but it really came down to how I felt about myself. Eventhough I was heavy from the time I was 18 years old until my mid 30's, I still felt confident. I was still cute and people loved me and I had a good life and even met my wonderful hubster. But the bigger I got, the worse I felt about myself - it even got to the point where I tried to think of ways to avoid seeing my own best friends because I was so ashamed.

Mom told me years ago that it's not worth wasting time and energy on something you have no power to change. Good advice! And in this case, the opposite was true. Here I was worrying about soemthing I COULD change and but I was wasting time and energy worrying instead of doing something about it! So November 2009, I pledged that it was time to change - and I've been on my journey ever since.

Cambrendle

285 ish was my max -- I'm hovering 236-238 now... I'm 5'9". I"m aiming for 150-170 with some sculpture. At my max and now... I am embarrassed, refuse to look in the mirror and thought my lounge pants and way over-sized shirt were hiding it well enough... until some guy asked me if it was okay to smoke in front of me (he thought I was PREGNANT!!)... the shame... I was mortified! What's worse - when I was actually pregnant I didn't look like that, I weighed 165 lbs the day my son was born. I tend to be the photographer instead of IN the photos... because photos are just like kicking me in the gut with all of the excuses I've made for the past 3 years to allow myself to get to this point. I have uploaded some for posterity here yesterday to show before weight loss (a year old, I've been successful at hiding from the camera for the past year) and what I'd like to look like again, where I was 3 years ago when my son was born.

ziggyplayedguitar

At 5', 5" my highest weight was 220. I found out when going to a physical after having not been on a scale in two years. I always assumed I was around 200 - I learned I was that heavy when trying out Wii Fit in front of my roommates. It was mortifying, and yet I ignored it, telling myself I didn't look that bad. But at 220 something just snapped. I remembered all the TV shows featuring people that were so large they couldn't walk a parking lot, and they all always said the same thing, "It creeps up on you. You get used to one weight and justify it, and then gain more and more." And I realized I was doing the same thing.

I've always been on the heavier side. I did ballet as a girl, and at the first studio I had lessons at for five years I didn't have a single friend. All of the other girls were so much smaller than me. My mom made me wear a shape control thing under my costumes and for special occasions, which didn't affect me much then but looking back makes me feel she was ashamed of me for not being pretty like the other girls.

I was teased all the time in school - mostly elementary and middle school. I had long, beautiful hair, and I loved to draw and I was smart - and people commented on those things too. But at the end of the day none of it seemed to matter because I was fat - ugly - and certain other kids never let me forget it. In high school I didn't date. I wanted to very badly, but even on the occasion a guy would ask me out, I always thought he must be desperate to ask me, or maybe lost a bet. And I didn't want to be the butt of a joke, so I would decline. That's how low my self-esteem was. I didn't care what I wore, or how I looked. I didn't really get picked on much in high school, but after going through it for so long, the mind set that I wasn't as good as thin people was already hammered in.

I hated shopping for clothes because nothing I liked ever fit.

I lied about my weight on my driver's license, because I was so embarrassed to admit the truth.

I hated every single picture of myself. I don't have many photos of me in college because of this.

Every time I walked in a room, I looked around to see if I was the heaviest person there. I hated myself when it was the case.

I could be funny, so I clung to that, because people liked me better. The flip side of that is I don't know how to express serious emotions, not really. I can't be vulnerable, because I don't feel like I'm worthy of those emotions.

But! This story has a happy ending! Or at least, I'm working towards that. I've lost almost 30 pounds and yes - getting that first digit in your weight to be a 1 is a great feeling! I'm about half way to where I want to be, and I'm so excited. Already my old clothes that I had stashed away over the years for no longer fitting - fit! It's like getting a whole new wardrobe. I feel powerful and strong after a good work out, and every day I love the changes I see in the mirror. I love love love fashion and new clothes. Yes, I still feel self-conscious often, especially when looking through racks of more trendy places while all the 6s and 4s flit around, because I am still not skinny. But that's just another battle I'll have to fight. It helps to remember that they might have had to fight for their size too. And even if not, that they probably also have insecurities, so it's unfair to just think 'oh, well, they're thin, so they have no idea'. I learned that in college hanging out with my thinner friends - the sort of things they worried about with their own appearance, when I had always assumed that after you were at a certain pants size your body image issues would only be petty things. The truth is you never know.

A huge congrats to everyone losing and lost all that baggage, no matter where you start or what your goal is. It takes hard work, and so long as we stick to it we WILL all see our goals reached someday!