Polygamy, Your thoughts.

KittieLea

I could never share my man, I'd have to cut a *****.

mslack01

If four women want to live in the same house together and share a man, then they can have at it. I don't care. Much luck to them. Agree with the others that the government should stay out of it.

frootcat

The reason you could not share your husband ... you were raised with the "notion" that it's OK for a woman to have a positive sense of self worth. It's OK for you to feel that your are equal to a man.

Girls raised in polygamy are not taught this. If a woman who share's her husband is jealous ... the woman has a problem. She's the bad guy. It's not like "Big Love" ... girls raised in this environment are taught they are second class citizens.

Maybe in polygamous relationships as practiced by certain religions, but that doesn't have to be true.

ChristiH4000

I'm fine with consenting adults getting down any way their sick little hearts desire.
Polygamy is in part so taboo because in it's practice hay day it married very young girls (12-14) to much older men without true choice and while forcing many of the young men out of the communities to save the girls for the old creepers. There was quite a bit of brainwashing, rape, and very little true freedom for many of the women/girls in those communities.

mericksmom

If It is okay for a guy to marry or be with how man girls he wants, I would hope I could do the opposite and get married to or be with as many guys as I would like. But it isnt hurting me and if they have talked trough the situation and are consenting ADULTS then it is up to them. But what guy in his right mind would have to deal with 2 or more PMS'ing, menopause-ing women.

mslack01

Consenting adults can do what they want.

Adults = 18+ not 12 year olds

My only other problem with it is that if you have 12 wives and 48 kids then you should pay to have 12 wives and 48 kids. you shouldn't have 11 wives collecting WIC and Welfare and anything else they can.

I agree with this statement also

AlyRoseNYC

Consenting adults can do what they want.

Adults = 18+ not 12 year olds

My only other problem with it is that if you have 12 wives and 48 kids then you should pay to have 12 wives and 48 kids. you shouldn't have 11 wives collecting WIC and Welfare and anything else they can.

Great points here.

mtaylor33557

The reason you could not share your husband ... you were raised with the "notion" that it's OK for a woman to have a positive sense of self worth. It's OK for you to feel that your are equal to a man.

Girls raised in polygamy are not taught this. If a woman who share's her husband is jealous ... the woman has a problem. She's the bad guy. It's not like "Big Love" ... girls raised in this environment are taught they are second class citizens.

I know its like that in some families.. but (and I know they may act different for the cameras) the family on "sister wives" seem perfectly normal.. no degrading the women, a lot of the wives work... they really don't seem that different from the dynamics of most of the families I know.

76tech

Just my luck that I would get 4 women to go along with this idea and then their TOM didn't synch up. Every week there would be one woman p*ssed off.

One out of four pissed at all times is better than four at once...

ChristiH4000

Consenting adults can do what they want.

Adults = 18+ not 12 year olds

My only other problem with it is that if you have 12 wives and 48 kids then you should pay to have 12 wives and 48 kids. you shouldn't have 11 wives collecting WIC and Welfare and anything else they can.

Great point on the welfare! It's certainly burdensome on the public system if it were abused in this way.

_Bob_

I worked with a couple polygamists, they were cool down to earth people. not like the ones you hear about on the news. It's not for me but to each his own.

I'm not willing to share my wife with another man and so I would never put her through having to share me. oh and the guys I know, the wives are the ones that arrange the marriages to more wife's. but my favorite polygamist family is the two Doctors that have been bffs all there life so they found a boy toy for both of them to marry. They bring home the bacon and it's his job to stay in shape to keep them both happy.

maab_connor

you don't involve animals. you don't involve children. everyone has to be consenting.

besides that, what someone else does in their own bedroom is NONE of my business.

i have friends who are poly - they have a VERY strong marriage. they are VERY commited to one another and their daughter wants for nothing. they also do better, sexually, when they have a girlfriend. that's how THEY work.

every marriage has it's own rules. and none of those rules are my business.

BrettPGH

I'm with the (surprising) majority. Don't mess with kids, otherwise it's absolutely none of my business.

And I can see the benefits, sure. Not just in having more than one woman. Imagine having a guy who wanted to take your wife to all that boring crap you hate? Or someone else who can fix a cabinet. It's sort of practical. And there's even the "Honey, you're being a pain right now. Please go talk to Frank about this."

For people who can make it work it's probably kind of nice. Most important it's their lives, let them be happy so long as they're not hurting anyone else. Or expecting welfare to cover the costs, that's bull.

sarahrbraun

personally, I don't like to share---men, water bottles, chocolate--you get the idea....

while I like the idea of a tight knit family, and the children feeling comfortable with going to the other "moms" for any of their needs when the birth mother is not available...I don't like the double standard. Seems like it is OK for a man to have multiple partners, but the idea of one woman having multiple husbands at one time is obscene?

I find it interesting that on some recent episodes of Sister Wives, Christine has been having issues that are *wrong* in polygamy, but the rest of us find to be very *normal*--she is having issues being jealous of Robyn! In one of the last episodes, one of Christine's young ( like elementary aged) daughters said that she was NOT planning on being a polygamist when she grew up.

oh well, as long as they are happy and don't force us to conform to their ideas...and they are all consenting adults...let them be.

Bronx_Montgomery

bathsheba_c

Three observations for everyone:

1. Both Judaism and Islam only allow polygamy when the man can afford completely separate households for the wife.
2. Even though the Bible allows polygamy, there is not a single incidence of polygamy in the Bible where it ends well (cf. Sarah and Hagar, Rachel and Leah, Hannah and Pninah, King Solomon's wives leading him into idolatry, etc.).
3. When Jews fled to Israel from the Arab countries, Israel recognized their polygamous marriages, even though the country itself bans polygamy. Nonetheless, most polygamous marriages broke up shortly after the people arrived.

ehg87

O here, please, let me be the one with the backwoods opinion. It's disgusting, as far as sanitation goes...well let me not go there *gags* gives their children a seriously warped sense of life, no stable self appreciating woman could be in that relationship, and it's ultimately all about the man...I mean what century are we in here? And I won't be arguing, so to everyone that decides they should tell me I have no business telling other people what makes them happy, please don't waste your time b/c I'm not even going to recheck to see the response I get....I've read enough of these I know what it will be.
I am so sick and tired of people acting as though there is nothing morally right or wrong; just whatever makes you happy.....morally polygamy is WRONG (oh no did someone say there can still be something WRONG is this world, how dare me) I mean what if i think stealing makes me happy? Why should the government or anyone be allowed to tell me that I can't do that? Come on, it makes me happy and it's only me on this whole huge planet so don't you dare tell me stealing is off limits to me...it might be for you...but not for me because while it might make you feel guilty, it makes me soooo happy... GET REAL! You're not a one person world here for your happiness.
Some "personal" decisions effect society as a whole when they're allowed to run rampant (because some people are so far gone their personal right and wrong meter is BROKE).....so let's think of the good of society...do we want submissive doormat women? do we want girls raised in this thinking they should be a doormat? boys raised to think their king of the castle? and let's not forget DISEASE!!! For such an educated, medicinally & technologically advanced country there are some really idiotic thinking (or lack there of) going on. Please enjoy roasting me

maddmaddie

Its definately NOT for me...I don't like to share.

But if consenting adults want to share thats fine...just as long as you don't pressure me with your beliefs or try to "convert" me.

Gay, Lesbian, Bi-sexial, Morman, Trans, fat, skinny, whatever...
If you're nice to me I'll be nice to you.

Just_Dot

^Meme fail.^ Half of it was cut off...for me, at least.

As long as all parties are consenting and age of majority, have at it. The 2 poly families that I know are two men, one woman, and they make it work, for them.

I joke that I would love a "sister wife" all the time...:laugh:

momo2011Tuck

just like gay marriage and abortion - I think people should live how they want and its not my business. As long as it's not a weird cult marrying off 12 year old girls by force. Willing adults? sure.

^This

After I started watching the show Sisterwives on TLC I actually began to like them as people, and their lifestyle doesnt bother me but i have to admit i am guilty of being one of those who was skeptical and grossed out by the thought when the show first came out... now its my sunday night show.

Although, the lifestyle is not for me... I dont share well lol

macpatti

I'm with the (surprising) majority. Don't mess with kids, otherwise it's absolutely none of my business.

How are they "not messing with the kids" when the kids are living in the home?

LindaCWy

Just my luck that I would get 4 women to go along with this idea and then their TOM didn't synch up. Every week there would be one woman p*ssed off.

But if they did all sych up they would all be mad at the same time...

Shayztar

The fundamentalists are creepy, but the media polygamists make it seem cool. Sister Wives, Big Love - seems like an ideal set up to have a close knit family and built-in best friends. Until I think about how my loving husband is over there having "relations" with my best friend. That's when my warm and fuzzy feelings end and I turn into HULK and want to go over there and SMASH.

bethdris

To each their own, As long as they aren't soaking up the welfare system, have at it. I am sure one husband is PLENTY for me. I am also sure, I wouldn't want to share him with any other woman.

JessieNeutronGirlGenius

My mother watches sisterwives and she LOVES IT. I think the same as you do. If they arent hurting anyone or themselves then leave them alone. They should be able to do what they want.

The government doesn't like it for two reasons:

1. Taxes...taxing these marriages would become too difficult and crazy for the government to handle so instead of not being lazy they put laws against it.

2. Polygamy has been seen in different cults. Although sisterwives ISN'T a cult...polygamy has been found in them.

macpatti

I'm with the (surprising) majority. Don't mess with kids, otherwise it's absolutely none of my business.

How are they "not messing with the kids" when the kids are living in the home?

I think you should explain your ignorance a little better.

I'm sorry....what? My point is that everything parents do in their home with children affects the children. If Brett was meaning that in a sexual way, I misunderstood. I read it to be confusing the kids.

jdploki70

But if you let people marry more than one person, what's to stop them marrying more than one coffee table?

Splinters...

sdereski

what is cracking me up here is everyone assuming the relationship would be one man with multiple wives. I have friends in my life where it is one woman and two men. It's not about the men sharing the woman. They all love (and enjoy) each other equally.

That's what I was thinking!

MissFit0101

I do not believe, and no one could ever convince me, that it is a healthy environment for children to be raised.

BrettPGH

I'm with the (surprising) majority. Don't mess with kids, otherwise it's absolutely none of my business.

How are they "not messing with the kids" when the kids are living in the home?

They aren't hurting them. Just raise them in a loving household is all I ask from any parent really.

As was said earlier, when this happens in tiny religious sects that try to marry off 12 year old girls, that's a HUGE problem. The government abolutely should find these sects and take the children from the homes of these religious nutjobs.

But a group of people who decide for whatever reason that they all love each other and want to raise whatever family they have together in a loving, caring, protective environment...well I'm all for that. It's doesn't make any difference to me if there's one parent, two or 12 involved. It takes a village after all...