Does anyone else NOT want kids?

LaurnWhit

^ Agree

I have a daughter but I totally understand the viewpoint of not having kids. I have more friends that do not have or want kids then friends that have kids and I am jealous of them. They go on tons of vacations, have money and go out during the week without worrying about a babysitter. Sooo lucky.

KettleBellHoe

I rather have pets. But i am only 18.

LorinaLynn

Never wanted kids, at least once I realized having them was an option! Now 40 and still haven't changed my mind.

brewface811

I absolutely cannot stand kids. I'm only 21 but decided a long time ago that I don't want them. I get tired of people saying "you'll change your mind" or "you have to have at least one." Why is it expected for people to have children and why do I HAVE to do anything? For some it really isn't the right choice. My boyfriend of 6 years is on the fence about them, but he's never changed a diaper and thinks that is the most disgusting thing ever so I can't imagine him actually having one.

stylistchik

So Much ignorance out there, it amazes me. if you look at the stastistics there is enough room in TEXAS for everyone on the planet to have one square foot. That is just texas! Come on people. I think there are way to many selfish people in this world, why do you think Germany is at negative population growth.If everyone thinks like this what do you think will happen in 50 years? Good thing your parents didn' t think like you or you would never have been given a chance to experience your wonderful life.

I hope you don't have children and if you do I hope they are getting a good education from someone other than you.

momma3sweetgirls

Just tell people you're not having any. They'll get it eventually. Don't feel bad if you do change your mind though. My cousins told everyone at their wedding reception that they weren't having kids - EVER - to stop the harrassing, but well-meaning comments from friends and family. They have a daughter now. By choice.

TheDreadPirateRoberts

I was talked into having kids as I always thought it was a selfish thing to do given how damned unpleasant the world can be and is getting and because humanity are already seriously overburdening the planet.

However, I became convinced that I could be a better dad than other people (not hard in some cases) and had two. I got divorced after my wife cheated and she kept the house I'd paid for as we had kids. I hardly saw them after that as they got poisoned by their mum towards me. Now that they are independant I am seeing them now and then which is nice, but its been a long and painful road and not one I'd walk again.

esphixiet

I never wanted to get pregnant and have my own child that way, but I was open to the idea of adoption. But my spouse is 10 years older than me and we quickly decided that there were loads of other stuff that we'd rather be doing than raising children. As soon as we came to that decision, we started being vocal with it among family, so that it wasn't a shock one day when it came up.
I get very irritated with those who say "oh, you'll change your mind, wait til your bio clock starts ticking!" I've decided to simply tell overly curious parties that we're "unable" to have children, instead of "unwilling". Its none of their damn business either way.

sunnyrunner77

ME! Since I was a kid! No one has ever understood it, and people just assume you're going to go that route. I've set that expectation with both my ex and current husband. I was required to get a hysterectomy back in February due to some lady problems, and couldn't be happier about it!

d3mon4ngel

Crazy cat lady in training here :laugh:

I used to want kids from when I was kid myself right up to around age 20. In the last 10 years though, I've done a complete 180 and really do not want any children of my own.

Don't get me wrong. I love kids. I think my little brother, my nephews and my niece are amazing, but I love being the cool auntie and being able to give them back at the end of the day. My family say I'd make a great mother because they see the way I am with them, but I'm more than happy being child-free.

I still get the impression that my mum thinks I'm not a real woman because I've not had kids yet, but I just ignore it now. One sister has four and the other is now pregnant with her first, so it's not like she's short on grandchildren

BrienJD

I don't. Don't have the desire, skills or temperment and no patience for it. Father material I am not and I know it.

Arwen280804

I don't know to be honest.

Some days yes, some days no. I know my husband is on the fence over the whole subject too.

We are both in our mid-30's now, so I guess time is running out. Never sure if it is hormones that cause me to want to have kids some day, or not!

But for now at least we are happy as we are.

philOHIO

My honest opinion...

I thought about it... wasn't a priority. Then I saw my baby daughter. It changes your entire life seeing your eyes look back at you. Something you will never understand until it happens. I wouldn't trade my kids for anything!

Emancipated_Tai

I'll be 30 this year & never been pregnant. I knew when I as 8 that I didn't want kids. It's your decision. MIL isn't pushing a screaming bloody fetus from her uterus, so tell her to mind her own business!

shaynak112

I don't plan to have kids. I'm 21 so I still have some time to decide but I really don't want kids. My boyfriend doesn't either. Ugh kids just creep me out.
I said possibly I may adopt in the future but that's it.

MsEmmy

I know many couples who decided not to have kids and I totally support them even though I have 2 myself. Out of all the people I know who have said they never want kids (and I know a lot of people because I've worked as a teacher and changed jobs a few times) I only know of one person who changed her mind and after years of saying she would never have kids, she had one at 38. The rest are all happily childless.

I was never maternal til I had my two boys. I would visit relatives who'd had a baby and would rather play with the pet dog than hold the child! But I had my kids young at 24 and 26 and wouldn't have it any other way - it gave me a focus and motivation to train as a teacher to provide for them. It made me more considerate towards other people and closer to other members of my family. Other people can do that without having kids to show them the way! One of my boys has been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome and it's not been easy but we have the most amazing fun times (as well as some crappy ones!) and I wouldn't change him for the world.

I dont think it's selfish at all to not want kids, it shows thought and maturity and knowing yourself well ....far more selfish to have them and not give them a good life.

MJ7910

i thinks it's really rude for people to pressure each other to have kids. if someone doesn't want to have any, it is totally their decision and actually "forcing" someone to have a kid could be worse for both the future kid and the parents. I dont' get why a lot of people think that others have to make the same decision. I only want one kid and i already have her and i get a lot of pushback for that decision. people say i'm selfish to only have one, that i'll regret it, etc. but really i see this as my and my partner's decision and if he doesn't want any more kids and i don't want any more kids, why have more? just to satisfy other people. no, i don't think so. for the longest time i didn't want any kids and one day i was 30 and decided i did. it just works out for us to have one and i don't think she'll be mad some day we didn't have more. my husband is an only child and he loved it. i have 4 siblings i never really see because we all live so far away. so there is no guarantee having more than one kid will make them close friends or even like each other. so really it's a personal thing. it is no one's business but yours. my advice woudl be to think of something that annoys them if they keep bringing it up and ask them "why dont' you do.... *insert whatever behavior they don't want to do*?" they are the ones being selfish if they think you NEED to have kids to be a better person or whatever.

BettyIW

As
a young girl I always told myself some day I was going to have six children. why? I don't know! And the fact of the matter is, I did give birth to six children. Understand too that two of those children were conceived while being on birth control!! I guess I was just destined.
My oldest child said he never never wanted to have children because in his words, 'Mom, I'm too selfish, I want to go and do whatever I want without the concern of a child/ren. I want to sail around the world and experience life first hand.' I remember telling him that I hoped then he didn't have any children if that was his true desire.
He had this mindset until the age of 36 when his life turned upside down. One day he called me and said, 'Mom, I've met a woman I really love and I want to be the father of her much desired baby daughter!'. Wow! Their daughter was born when my son was 37 years old. Gracie is my granddaughter through my oldest son. I cherish her because I thought I never would have a grandchild through my oldest son.
The cute thing is: He is the most loving, most doting Daddy!! He called me after he had taken his infant daughter to her medical appointments and would say, 'Mom, this is the circumference of her head, etc., etc. etc. It is so awesome for me to see him being an awesome Daddy in his daughter's life. He cherishes her and is so proud of his child.
My oldest daughter too said she never wanted to have children. But in her late twenties she called and said, 'Mom, we're thinking of having a child.' Next thing I know she called and said, 'Hey Mom, I'm pregnant!' How exciting for them.
I'm grateful they didn't have children when they said they didn't want any kids.
But I agree, if you don't want kids, don't have them.

DeeVanderbles

I'm 23, my fiance is 31. We have decided that we don't want kids. Our relationship is perfect the way it is and I truly don't think children would be healthy for our relationship. Also, I do not have the patience for children. I am selfish and like my current lifestyle and don't want to change it.

But, it is funny how things change. When my fiance and I got together 2.5 years ago I wanted a baby asap. But within a few months, that changed completely.

I love children and would love to have some nieces and nephews to spoil some day but having my own is just not for me.

rchupka87

Most of my friends and family think I am insane. I have wanted kids my entire life. I wanted to give birth, and go natural, and breast feed. I have had my future kids names picked out for YEARS. I finally found the guy. And he’s amazing. And he came with two kids. A girl who is now 10, and a boy who is now 5. We have been together for four years. The way I look at it – I have my kids. I don’t want any more. I went through the diapers and the pacifiers and the potty training with his son. I have heard the speeches about what I missed out on. I missed being pregnant, and having a baby shower, and feeling your child kick inside you. I missed out on child birth, and midnight feedings and a lot of firsts. Their first steps, their first word… I missed a lot. Sure, once in a while, it crosses my mind. We will see a child out that has red hair, and we make comments, that’s what our baby would look like… But it is always a fleeting thought. It never lasts, and I have no real desire to have my “own” child. My family is complete the way it is.