Is it rude...

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  • stylistchik
    stylistchik Posts: 1,436 Member
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    A wedding gift opening party? What? Sounds like an odd tradition. If i had one of those, it would have been a pretty quick party.. I received all cards and one knife set.

    I know. I would think the bride and groom would be busy the day after the wedding.

    I don't think it's common everywhere. I had never heard of it until I moved here (NE Wisconsin). Personally I didn't want one, because as others have said...it's a bit uncomfortable, but people around here expect it.

    Honestly, not everyone from our wedding party came to our's and I wasn't offended. I had too many other people to try to entertain and visit with!

    Yeah It's in Minnesota, I guess it's a midwest thing but I had still never heard of it.
  • cristileigh
    cristileigh Posts: 158 Member
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    I would think if you are part of the wedding party you should participate in everything as support and help for the bride.
  • Im_NotPerfect
    Im_NotPerfect Posts: 2,181 Member
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    Wedding gift opening party? wtf!! Sod the party, I'd be looking for new friends, ones who didn't try to take all your time & energy by dragging their bloody wedding crap on for so long.

    What a pointless exercise & totally tacky. What do they do? Open the gift, lift it up for every one to ohh & ahh over & then move on the the next one. How Jersey shore of them! bleurgh.

    Hmm...and yet it's not "totally jersey shore" of you to utterly and completely insult other people's traditions, huh? Nice....hope your customs and traditions are 100% proper and free from other people's judgements.

    Wow....some people....
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
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    A wedding gift opening party? What? Sounds like an odd tradition. If i had one of those, it would have been a pretty quick party.. I received all cards and one knife set.

    Oh my gosh, we got almost exactly the same thing, except ours was as set of silverware, not just knives, haha :)

    I think this is a tradition created by wedding planners who just want to make more money arranging another event. That said, if I were in the wedding I would probably go out of obligation. If you are comfortable enough with the friend ask her if she would be ok if you left early or didn't come at all in order to spend a little bit of time with your family since you haven't seen them. Being open about it would be FAR better than just not showing up OR going and being agitated and resentful the whole time!
  • DargoMack
    DargoMack Posts: 75 Member
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    I've been to them - I think they are stupid, boring and I've been hungover while attending. My sister got married last year and was moping and pouting that my parents weren't going to have one for her. I would also explain it and skip to be with your family. I'm getting married next year and under no circumstances will this be happening. I'm already having anxiety about opening gifts at the shower.

    I won't even get on to my soap box about how weddings have become completely out of control....
  • abbeyl11
    abbeyl11 Posts: 73
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    I've never even heard of a gift opening party... what is this ridiculousness?! Making people come to a party to watch you open gifts?! I think that's weird. I've heard of having a post-wedding brunch... but calling it a gift opening party?? lmao...
  • abnerner
    abnerner Posts: 452 Member
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    If your in the wedding, you have to go....sorry :(

    but it's super rude to have a gift opening party in the first place lol
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    Friday and Saturday consume enough of your time when you don't get back home often. Visit with your family.
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
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    That's a odd tradition. I wouldn't say it's rude to skip at all! You already traveled so far, for the rest. I am sure she will understand if you explain! x
  • amberlynyeager
    amberlynyeager Posts: 48
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    I am the MOH to my best friend's wedding in December, and I live over 1500 miles from home.... At first I was only going to be a Bridesmaid, but it didn't feel right for her, and she gets her way, so I'm her MOH even though I can't do everything they should be able to do in the process. Best friends since grade school... Anyway, she understands that I'll be spending time with my family while I'm back home. That's what true friends do, they're understanding, especially knowing that you went all that way... So I don't find it to be rude, because there are a few things that I will not be doing while I'm back home myself, and she completely understands and is not upset at all.
  • Nelski
    Nelski Posts: 1,607 Member
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    People have gift opening parties????

    Wow
    LOL
  • twistofcain
    twistofcain Posts: 190
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    I would think if you are part of the wedding party you should participate in everything as support and help for the bride.

    Should she go on the honeymoon as well and assist with them having sex?
  • ajstarz2
    ajstarz2 Posts: 1
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    Any freind who respects and loves you enough to be in their wedding will respect your decision to see your family and make the most of your trip home. But Thank them for the invitation and respectfully decline. Let them know you had planned to see your family that day.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    Actually if you already made plans with your family, it would be rude to ditch them for the party.
  • khaosstar
    khaosstar Posts: 26 Member
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    I'm going to jump on the bandwagon and say that I've never heard of it.. and I personally find it *really* tacky and rude. Wow... I wouldn't go to something like that whether I was a bridesmaid or not, but then again, I don't know anyone who would think it's a good idea to organize one, either.
  • cheerforsteelers
    cheerforsteelers Posts: 686 Member
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    Yeah I find this odd but only because I'm not used to it. I don't think it's rude not to go as long as you give notice as early as possible and not right before the gift opening. I also find it kind of silly that there is a bridal shower (with gifts) and then there's the wedding where gifts are brought too. That's just me, but then again I've never been married.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    I've never even heard of such a thing. Morning after brunch yes, everyone come and sit and watch me open ****? No. honestly I wouldn't go, but no one that would expect me to be in their wedding would also expect me to show up to a gift opening party if I didn't want to.
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
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    Thats b/s

    A three day wedding, "oh look at me I'm special"

    Defo do not go.
  • _Elemenopee_
    _Elemenopee_ Posts: 2,665 Member
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    In this day and age, the bridal shower, BEFORE the wedding, is when you watch the bride open her gifts. Some brides-to-be don't even like the whole "look at me and what I got" aspect and ask for clear wrapping on gifts so you don't have to "show off". I had no choice in my shower planning since it was all a surprise and loved how simple and friendly it all was. Family and friends celebrating the bride and her upcoming wedding. After the wedding? I'm still scratching my head.
  • TrailRunner61
    TrailRunner61 Posts: 2,505 Member
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    After my daughter's wedding we did the same thing. We had a lovely brunch with Mimosas, etc. and it was nice. She invited family and her friends who were in the wedding party.However, iIt ended up being awkward because so many guests gave cash and some gave a lot, some gave a little. Not that she cared what they gave but she felt embarrassed telling the amounts aloud so they could be written down for future thank yous. She ended up just handing me the cards and that worked but we still had that awful awkward moment whenever she opened a card. Everyone would get quiet. lol
    I honestly believe that the 'gift opening' should be for immediate family only. Just my opinion, but I'd do what you feel comfortable with and if you think you've spent enough time with the bride the last few days, I'm sure she'd understand that you need some family time.
    Good luck with your decision. <hugs>

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