Why do people not allow the "under 1200" friend requests
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I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
Weird how that works.
I am 5ft2 and eat 2,000 just to lose weight xD0 -
I vary rarely eat 1200 calories, it is not because of an eating disorder or because I don't want to, it is extremely hard for me to get that many calories. I usually eat atleast 4 times a day, I try and get as close to 1200 as possible, but there are days where I barely net 800 and I just can't help it0
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I know a few people that may eat less than that and they are trying to eat more for their own health. I had dinner last Friday with a group of about six people and after I told the group how i was tracking calories to cut a few lbs This one girl proceeded to tell the group how she tracks her calories to try an gain weight.
It was as hard for her to get more calories in order to gain weight as it was for me to eat less.
We really have no idea what someone eating a small amount of food has going on in their life and what they are trying t deal with.
I never judged people before based on what they eat or do not eat and after chatting with her i understand why we should never judge others without knowing all the facts.
Just my thoughts and observations.0 -
Many would be here to recruit others to eat less. If you have someone who is very influenced with low self esteme the outcome could be very bad.
Eating less than 1200 is not good. I would friend them though unless and until they tried to tout their extremes. I would try to make them see how unhealthy it is0 -
One of us doesn't fully understand intermittent fasting....
(...and I'm being serious when I say I'm not entirely sure which of us that is.)
Maybe neither of us, as there are different types, which can all have positive effects. But in the recent BBC documentary that a lot of people here were talking about, one sustainable type that was suggested (and which Michael Mosley decided to do) was the one I just described.0 -
I'll be a pal but you have to accept I'm in the 1800-2200kcal park.0
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To each their own. I did have a friend that only averaged 500 cals a day. Now THAT was ridonkulous.0
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I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
Yes!! This is why I get so fed up with the "eat more to weigh less" people who stalk these forums. It's great if the obese people on here can lose weight eating 1500-2000 calories, but that's just not gonna fly when you're short and not overly large. I personally could never lose weight eating anything over 1000 because I'm 5'3 and have always been in the healthy weight range, so it's harder for me to lose weight than some people.0 -
Because everyone can choose on their own who to allow and not allow to be their "friends".0
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^This. I don't have any "I won't accept your friend request if you do X or don't do Y" rules, but I have deleted "friends" I just could not support because of their unhealthy choices -- it stresses me out to see them harming themselves, and to see all their friends cheering them on. I can't be a part of it, and if I don't think I can change it, it doesn't need to be in my life. I've also deleted people who were all about the drama, "woe is me," and full of excuses. Basically, if you can't support me, and if I can't support you, and if you're stressing me out, well, then what's the point?I used to add everyone. I would accept friend requests from girls with EDs because I wanted to help.
After reading posts like these:
Ugh I ate way too much (300 cals) I fell like i should throw up
I cannot believe i ate so much today! I am a fat cow (like 800 calories)
Calorie goals around 200 a day with mostly cigs and diet soda
Seeing posts about them getting out of the hospital
much worse
So much self hate and self harm. It made me get too worried. They didn't want my help. Too far in. They wanted support for their eating0 -
I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
Yes!! This is why I get so fed up with the "eat more to weigh less" people who stalk these forums. It's great if the obese people on here can lose weight eating 1500-2000 calories, but that's just not gonna fly when you're short and not overly large. I personally could never lose weight eating anything over 1000 because I'm 5'3 and have always been in the healthy weight range, so it's harder for me to lose weight than some people.
I'm not obese. I'm not even technically overweight. I'm not tall (I'm half an inch shorter than you). I'm not particularly active. And I can still lose weight on 1400 calories.
Unless your resting heart rate is like 40bpm, there's no way that you HAVE to eat less than 1000 calories per day.0 -
I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
Yes!! This is why I get so fed up with the "eat more to weigh less" people who stalk these forums. It's great if the obese people on here can lose weight eating 1500-2000 calories, but that's just not gonna fly when you're short and not overly large. I personally could never lose weight eating anything over 1000 because I'm 5'3 and have always been in the healthy weight range, so it's harder for me to lose weight than some people.
Okay? I am not even close to obese. 118 pounds and 5ft2. Eat at least 2,000 calories a day to lose.
So it does work for people who are short and not overly large. Depends on the person.0 -
Many would be here to recruit others to eat less.
Why would you think that? In 'real life' and on other sites, I have a few friends with eating disorders, and friends who eat less than they should, but none of them try to recruit others to do the same. I've never come across that at all. Generally it's a personal control thing, not a social/recruitment thing. The only people I come across who try to persuade people to do the same as what they do is people who eat a lot.0 -
Wow, I am so jealous of you!I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
Weird how that works.
I am 5ft2 and eat 2,000 just to lose weight xD
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I've seen both -- the two of you probably have experienced different sides of the coin, but they both still exist.Many would be here to recruit others to eat less.
Why would you think that? In 'real life' and on other sites, I have a few friends with eating disorders, and friends who eat less than they should, but none of them try to recruit others to do the same. I've never come across that at all. Generally it's a personal control thing, not a social/recruitment thing. The only people I come across who try to persuade people to do the same as what they do is people who eat a lot.0 -
At 5'0", 1200 calories without exercise is maintenance for me once I reach my goal of 110 lbs. So, in order to shed pounds, of course I have to eat less than that. On those days when I do get exercise in, and lighter people have to exercise a lot more to burn calories, I can eat the full 1200. Otherwise, I try to eat between 1000 and 1200. If anyone doesn't want to be my friend because of that, they can jump in a lake. I don't need those kinds of friends anyway.0
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I think it really does boil down to the fact that it's different for everyone and we shouldn't judge others choices without knowing any details.0
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To be completely honest I found MFP through stumbling upon pro-ana and pro-mia tags on instagram. They would take screen shots of their days and post 'Urrg fail' when they had over 400 cals. The feeling I got in my heart from that was so much pain for them.
I wouldn't friend them based on I need positive support and want to give support that's appreciated and well received. I do not have what it takes to support someone with an ED that does not want positive support when I am going through my own struggles.
That being said I probably wouldn't friend someone who has an overeating ED either if they weren't in the mind frame to change.
I do not want to friend people who want encouragement for the damage they are doing to themselves.
Blanket saying 'No friends under 1200' is pretty harsh but I understand the point of it. If you had a medical reason or really did need to stay under that it's fine. There is a huge difference to what you'd be posting over those people.
I'm not saying people with EDs are not worth my time. I am just not a professional and I know why those people are here. It's not healthy and I do not want to get into arguments with them that are wastes of time.0 -
I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
I am a very short person, and I don't think that I'm going to be able to lose weight trying to eat 1200 calories a day. It just won't happen. I guess I won't make friends.0 -
I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
Yes!! This is why I get so fed up with the "eat more to weigh less" people who stalk these forums. It's great if the obese people on here can lose weight eating 1500-2000 calories, but that's just not gonna fly when you're short and not overly large. I personally could never lose weight eating anything over 1000 because I'm 5'3 and have always been in the healthy weight range, so it's harder for me to lose weight than some people.
Okay? I am not even close to obese. 118 pounds and 5ft2. Eat at least 2,000 calories a day to lose.
So it does work for people who are short and not overly large. Depends on the person.
Lucky! How does that work? You must be really active or have the metabolism of God. I am insanely jealous that you can eat that much and still lose.0 -
At 5'0", 1200 calories without exercise is maintenance for me once I reach my goal of 110 lbs. So, in order to shed pounds, of course I have to eat less than that. On those days when I do get exercise in, and lighter people have to exercise a lot more to burn calories, I can eat the full 1200. Otherwise, I try to eat between 1000 and 1200. If anyone doesn't want to be my friend because of that, they can jump in a lake. I don't need those kinds of friends anyway.
Check out this girls profile "love4fitnesslove4food"
she is 4 ft 11. Not sure of her exact weight, but I know she is light.
She NEVER eats less that 1800. Most days over that 0 -
I just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
Yes!! This is why I get so fed up with the "eat more to weigh less" people who stalk these forums. It's great if the obese people on here can lose weight eating 1500-2000 calories, but that's just not gonna fly when you're short and not overly large. I personally could never lose weight eating anything over 1000 because I'm 5'3 and have always been in the healthy weight range, so it's harder for me to lose weight than some people.
Okay? I am not even close to obese. 118 pounds and 5ft2. Eat at least 2,000 calories a day to lose.
So it does work for people who are short and not overly large. Depends on the person.
Lucky! How does that work? You must be really active or have the metabolism of God. I am insanely jealous that you can eat that much and still lose.
Just active I guess :0 Walk a lot around campus. Nothing special! Lifting weights sure helped me
I actually was on 1200 calorie diet before. Made me faint a lot and feel very sick 0 -
I've seen both -- the two of you probably have experienced different sides of the coin, but they both still exist.Many would be here to recruit others to eat less.
Why would you think that? In 'real life' and on other sites, I have a few friends with eating disorders, and friends who eat less than they should, but none of them try to recruit others to do the same. I've never come across that at all. Generally it's a personal control thing, not a social/recruitment thing. The only people I come across who try to persuade people to do the same as what they do is people who eat a lot.
They do exist but many will gravitate together naturally. The girls they 'recruit' already show signs of wanting to go down that path and will start looking for it, just like the 'recruiters' will go looking for them. Unfortunately this is one of the times where I think the internet is bad for people.0 -
I'll be your friendI just felt the need to reply to this because there seems to be so much negativity about low calorie diets on here. I think what many people seem to forget is that different people need different amounts of food to achieve the same amount of weight loss. I am a small framed girl with a height of 5'1 and I sometimes get sick of extremely tall people telling me that I will lose weight on, say, 1400 calories. For me personally, to lose weight, I need to eat a maximum of 1200 calories, and even that's pushing it most of the time. I eat healthy clean foods most of the time and if I don't exercise I can actually GAIN weight on 1200 calories. I do not have an eating disorder and never have, but I now have my diary hidden from my friends because I know many of them would comment on what is a perfectly healthy amount of food for me personally.
I am a very short person, and I don't think that I'm going to be able to lose weight trying to eat 1200 calories a day. It just won't happen. I guess I won't make friends. 0 -
I don't have a disclaimer on my profile, but I will delete people for what I honestly feel are dangerous behaviors. For example, I did have one friend who fasted and ate so little (even on non-fasting days) that she required sleeping pills to go to sleep thanks to hunger pains. There's NO WAY I can see that, continue to look at it, or encourage it. I left her with a message of well-wishes, and that was it.0
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Many would be here to recruit others to eat less.
Why would you think that? In 'real life' and on other sites, I have a few friends with eating disorders, and friends who eat less than they should, but none of them try to recruit others to do the same. I've never come across that at all. Generally it's a personal control thing, not a social/recruitment thing. The only people I come across who try to persuade people to do the same as what they do is people who eat a lot.
I feel like more people on here are encouraging others to over eat and not under eat. Give in to your cravings, just measure the ice cream so it can fit in with the day, just exercise more so you can still have your treats. More of that is on here than anything else. Few people suggest eating healthy. I think a lot of people on here have eating disorders and that is why they are trying to lose weight. Disorders are not just for the skinny folks. If you weigh 300 lbs you have a problem of some sort.
I stay around 1200 with a wide variety of foods and a lot of vegetables. I don't agree with trying to keep at 1200 if you are doing it with all shakes and bars with a taco bell dollar item tossed in every day. That isn't healthy.
This site has really opened my eyes to the food obsession in this country. My God, are you going to go into starvation mode if you can't squeeze in a damn cupcake? I had to cut out a lot of stuff when diagnosed with Celiac. I've gone through all the missing things. But I wasn't living off donuts to begin with.
I have blocked a person on here who is constantly saying anyone who eats 1200 calories is eating like a 6 yr old. I've seen her diary and she eats all crappy food and complains about being fat.
Don't take advice on health from anyone but your dr. Not people who claim to be nurses or whatever. Some people want to suck you into their world because they will never change theirs. The pro ana people can move on along with the chronic overeaters. If you want to be healthy then take steps to do so, don't make excuses. If you slip, start over. Don't make excuses. Leave the rest of us alone if we want to eat healthy and force feed. We don't all have disorders.0 -
I accept friend requests from anyone as long as they are 18 +, but I do have a caveat that I will voice concern about low calorie days or dangerous behaviors. I actually do that more for the people who don't want to hear it, so they don't bother to request me and save themselves some trouble. But if they can handle me being a pest about it, come on in!0
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I've seen both -- the two of you probably have experienced different sides of the coin, but they both still exist.Many would be here to recruit others to eat less.
Why would you think that? In 'real life' and on other sites, I have a few friends with eating disorders, and friends who eat less than they should, but none of them try to recruit others to do the same. I've never come across that at all. Generally it's a personal control thing, not a social/recruitment thing. The only people I come across who try to persuade people to do the same as what they do is people who eat a lot.
Ah, okay. Fair enough. But isn't it a bit unrealistic to make the assumption that people who eat less than 1200 calories (or indeed more than, say, 3000 calories) will likely be trying to recruit people to do the same? Surely most people are just getting on with their own food routine and trying to meet their own goals. There's nothing really to be gained in trying to persuade others to adopt the plan that happens to work for you. Obviously people have every right to make their own friending rules - I'm just curious to understand it, and also wondering whether I need to put any disclaimers on my own diary (because there are definitely days when I eat less than 1200 calories - I tend to listen to my body, rather than have a set number of calories that I stick to every day, and I find that works well for me in general).0 -
Well this totally sucks for people like me that have not known better their whole life and have always eaten as they like and are now trying to change their lifestyle! I wish I would have had some more knowledgable MFP friends over the last couple months. I'm pretty overweight and have lost 40 lvs., but ended up plateauing about 3 weeks ago. I had no idea what I was doing to my body. I was eating the amount of calories MFP told me to eat, but wasn't eating my aloroes back, so with my exercise I was only netting under 1000 each day. I wasn't hungry. I was and still am eating mostly good foods (lots of protein, whole grains, and lots of veggies!) I have been extremely frustrated as to why I stopped losing when I was losing so consistently. As per one of my MFP friends request (after her knowing that I wasn't as motivating and happy as I was before just because I wasn't posting regularly with my uplifting posts), I changes my settings on MFP to lose 1.5 a week instead of 2 and that upped my allotted calorie intake. I had gotten so used to eating only 1200/day, it's taking some getting used to. Today is only my second day at 1500 calories/day.
So, hopefully, I get past this very soon and start seeing results again, but for all you knowledgable people that don't allow under 1200 calorie MFPers on your friends list, it's people like me that you could have helped out with your knowledge.0 -
gonna set my calories to 1199......lol...0
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