Body Envy /rant

blonde71

I'm ashamed to admit it but yes. I'm human, after all. I find myself being envious of much younger women. Not celebrities but women on this site who are half my age and in my eyes, drop-dead gorgeous. I find myself mentally comparing body parts and body fat percentages, etc. Sometimes it drives me nuts, lol. For the most part, I'm mostly secure with myself and my progress but I think my envy comes from the fact that I regret not getting healthier when I was a lot younger. I feel like my youth was wasted in a way and that's where the jealousy comes into play. I know logically I shouldn't compare myself to a woman half my age or anyone but every once in awhile, the green-eyed monster comes out . :grumble:

meshashesha2012

I do it too <sigh> I guess it's a woman thing!

i've had a fallopian tubes all my life and have never done this... honestly i think it's more of a cultural thing. generally speaking western white women are raised to dislike their bodies

chelsealeigha

You have come so far and all you can see is what you don't have. I understand that, but I think that you need to talk to someone about your childhood issues. As long as you feel this way about yourself, you will never be happy. Happy isn't about being thin. Want to know how I know? Because I have been a hell of a lot thinner than I am now. I lost almost all of the weight I have now once. Guess what, it didn't make me happy. I had people tell me I looked pretty damn good. I never felt that way. You are on this journey for a reason. You have done an amazing job so far. Don't sabotage yourself! You will never be happy until you heal. Healing starts with the inside. The beautiful you is in there waiting to come out, and it has nothing to do with how you look at all. We can all tell you how pretty and nice you are. It's like throwing water balloons at a spiked wall. All of the beautiful comments people make cannot penetrate the wall of self loathing you have raised around yourself. Like I said, I know about this because I have been through it. You are young. Don't wait unitl you are 33 to do something about it. Take care of yourself. You are doing fabulous with the exterior, now go fix the interior so you can appreciate all of your hard work!!!! Hugs!

BrownEyedGrrl

sigh.... the sad truth about modern society and media influence

YUP!

TheRealParisLove

I used to have that problem, then I quit watching TV, buying women's magazines and pretty much avoided any media that promoted unrealistic body types.

Wanna see what real female bodies look like? Go visit your local strip club. Seriously. There is cellulite and stretch marks and sagging boobs everywhere. And these women are still able to earn a living by simply displaying their bodies. That is the real world!

jazee11

Girl, You have to learn to love yourself. Gain some self esteem and work with all that you have. It can't be as bad as you think it is. You do have to change the way you think. I agree with the poster that said you need to get a good workout routine going. Jonesing for what others have will always leave you empty and dissatisfied. Become the change that you would like to see.

erinxo13

I literally JUST did that before I clicked this looking at picture one of the blogs I follow posted...

anemoneprose

The most attractive women I know look nothing like models or pop stars or what have you. They`re women who figured out their unique appeal and made it work for them. Dress, hair, all of that can go a long way.

There are things that bother me about my body (I just posted about my hated stretch marks), but overall, I think I've worked out how to favour my good features, and generally feel pretty good. I'm not classically pretty, but I know from responses I get that other people think I'm at least ok, even cute (Despite my broad shoulders, etc)

Totally fruitless to try to mimic someone else. But it`s normal for younger people to do that. I tried to go blonde once, inspired by some rock star or other (disaster). Find out what your beauty is and work it.

Actresses who`ve done this:

Uma Thurman
Chloe Sevigny
Sarah Jessica Parker
Christina Ricci
Claire Danes
Kate Winslet
Kirsten Dunst

RubyRubixcube

I'm an Aus size 6 (thats a US 2 and UK 4) and I still sit there and become outrageously envious of VS models and curvy alternative chicks... its just about rocking your look I guess.. I still have to work hard on convincing myself that I'm alright looking. Skinny isn't everything

RubyRubixcube

I used to have that problem, then I quit watching TV, buying women's magazines and pretty much avoided any media that promoted unrealistic body types.

Wanna see what real female bodies look like? Go visit your local strip club. Seriously. There is cellulite and stretch marks and sagging boobs everywhere. And these women are still able to earn a living by simply displaying their bodies. That is the real world!

this...

vodkoffee

I guess I'll just never visit Asia. Because even if I hit my goal weight, I'd look like a mammoth next to the locals. >.<

I used to pray that I would hit puberty and turn into an Asian so I would be super thin and pretty forever. Obviously I never got my wish. Instead I hit puberty, gained a bunch of weight and am still struggling with it today. So I never got to be a pretty girl and have no self confidence and never feel good enough.

Even when I was at my thinnest, 120lbs at 5'7", American size 4, my bones still kept me in a Japanese XL. I have similar background to yours.

To give myself something of a reality check, I go to this site: http://www.mybodygallery.com/
Looking at normal pictures of people of my height and build really helps.

annabellj

you can still be like them.. all you need to do is once you've hit your goal weight.. change your training to maintaining it and shaping and toning.. you can do it babe

I don't think with my Germanic build I can become thin and perfect like the Korean women.

there are german women who are stunning with beautiful bodies you could be one of them its all your in attitude .. by having that attitude which you said above you won't do it because your not believing in yourself and have already lost the battle... who cares if your bigger bone embrace it and work it to your advantage girl... tone and shape it

Technically I'm an Irish, Scottish, English and Swedish (the side that I believe I share more of it's traits). I don't know of many large framed petite women with beautiful bodies on TV. I believe I'll hit my goal of 150, I just think it won't be enough to make me look good and I'm not sure if I can be much smaller than that with my bone and muscle structure unless I lose muscle and bone mass. >.<

no large framed, petite women on tv? ever seen drop dead diva? the main character is bigger, and gorgeous, I bet if you looked around a little more you could find a few!
the biggest thing I think is trying to stop comparing yourself to everyone else. I am trying to become the best "me" I can be. I know I still have goals that I havent met, and i am ok with that. I look pretty damn good right now, and I have worked really hard to get to where I am now. so have you! be proud of that!

cheerforsteelers

It's so easy to focus on things you don't like about yourself and wish you looked a certain way. Love yourself and love your body for the changes it has gone through and how amazing it is at its present state. Sure other women may have a firmer booty, perkier boobies, and smaller waists. Who cares? It's nice to just be able to be like..hey, she's pretty. But I'm pretty too. Just because someone may have what you believe to be a "perfect body" doesn't mean that person isn't struggling with other things in their life. You're beautiful just the way you are and your body is too.

MsMandy23

I live in Korea.. I can honestly say this is the most shallow superficial country I have ever lived in. The women, who are naturally thin, starve them self to look like the do in those videos. It is very common for korean women to survive on way under 1000 cals a day. Also, this country has the highest plastic surgery rate in the world. Nose jobs and eyelid surgery and boob jobs and lipo are common for fathers to give their daughters as highschool graduation presents. It is unacceptable to leave the house without makeup or your hair done. It is really sad and I feel sorry for young women growing up in this country. Theres nothing to envy trust me! You are beautiful.

Beezil

As long as you're comparing yourself to other people, it's very likely that you will always be unsatisfied with something about yourself.

amadacorazon

I used to have that problem, then I quit watching TV, buying women's magazines and pretty much avoided any media that promoted unrealistic body types.

Wanna see what real female bodies look like? Go visit your local strip club. Seriously. There is cellulite and stretch marks and sagging boobs everywhere. And these women are still able to earn a living by simply displaying their bodies. That is the real world!

^^^Exactly!

losinginseoul

I live in South Korea and I can tell you that the Korean girls wish they look like the girls in the Kpop video too. Its not reality. Get over it.

CoffeeNBooze

ive already told you what you need to do to accomplish a hot body.. one is attitude and believing in yourself the other is maintaining your weight and toning and shaping!!! it's very much ahievable but you need to stop wishing you was like someone else because your not your you so you need to deal with it and stop been so negative

And what if after all that, I'm still not hot? What if I'm just destined for mediocrity? I'm only 32 pounds away from my goal and I'm not too impressed. Those last 32 pounds are gonna have to have a miracle with them to make me bikini ready. Sorry, I'm having a down day. I swear I'm happier most of the time. >.<

you are hot! it's all in the way you carry yourself, how you walk, talk, attitude is the sexiest of all.. you can have a super hot body but if you dont love yourself your never going to see that and by the sounds of it you dont like yourself or love yourself... you need to be happy with yourself first.. and it is achieveable!!! attitude attitude attitude

How do you know? I only have pics of my face on this site for a reason. I'm a train wreck from the neck down. I don't like myself, when you're studied like a lab rat through your childhood, forced on medication and constantly being told that something is wrong with you, it's kinda hard to like yourself when you're treated like a freak of nature.

You know that phrase "fake it till you make it" ?

You need to start doing that. You're destiny is mediocrity if that's what you think of yourself.

T34418l3angel

This happens to everyone. There's always someone prettier, skinnier, funnier, flirtier, taller, etc. I sometimes catch myself looking at someone absolutely gorgeous and thinking "I would give anything to look like her". But alas there is only one me and I'm sure there has to be something of me that others may envy too, and as narcissistic as it sounds this makes me happy and feel ok with who I am. Be happy with who you are because there is allot about you that is to be envied as well

EvgeniZyntx

Beauty isn't your weight, your height or your boobs. Spend time in a museum - one can see a variety of body shapes and attitudes in the art work and the people walking about. It is therapeutic. It is so much easier to understand that beauty is the object of interaction to a space, an attitude either apparent or sublimes into an assumed pose, and imagined thought.
It is a smile, it is the thing that eyes say, it is how hand speak and the angle of a neck.
It is the attitude you rock, it is age well-worn and the willfulness of the individual. Forget the pulp of the glossy page, the real life contest is a measured in laughter or pain, experience wrought - we know this and forget it growing up.
Yes, fit and esthetically beautiful people are out there and wishing to be like that is a human norm, more or less to some degree, as social animals we look at others for cues and ideal behavior. But our beauty, our strength, is how we transform the common everyday into something exceptional.