What is with all the stipulations when friending someone?

Options
1234568»

Replies

  • mamagooskie
    mamagooskie Posts: 2,964 Member
    Options
    They may have had some bad experiences with mismatched interweb friendships. It has happened to me a few times. As much as we'd like to believe we're all here for the same reason....there are a lot of people out there with a way different approach and philosophy to weight loss and maintenance. I'm a 'eat more to weigh less' person and seeing constant posts in your news feed from a friends who eat less than a 1000 calories a day not positive, motivating or inspiring to me. I think people are just trying to cultivate a list of like minded friends. Although I admit when I was a newbie on here and saw people with restrictions to who their friends could be I thought it was kind of arrogant and pompous. Now i get it!

    well said. I have had too many $hitty friends on here that do nothing, say nothing, so now I like to keep my list smaller with people who are actually here to improve themselves and do so in a like minded way.
  • JesseJaymz
    JesseJaymz Posts: 30 Member
    Options
    I see it a lot. I'm definitely not picky at all. i like it when they have pictures, but i'm not going to turn anyone away. I usually do go through deleting people that haven't logged in for 3-4 months every now and then though.
  • opalescence
    opalescence Posts: 413 Member
    Options
    It has been a deterrent in requesting someone to be a friend.

    It also sucks to have someone accept your friend request and with the same click of the mouse delete you so I will value the friends I have made on here but highly unlikely I will be requesting any new friends.

    I can understand the cool peeps here having too many friends and not really in the market for new ones because having a high list can be a full time job keeping up with everyone plus they want to give their attention to those who give it to them, it just makes me sad that I joined so late in the game.
  • Lesley2901
    Lesley2901 Posts: 372 Member
    Options
    I don't put stipulations in my profile but occasionally I get friend requests with no message that make me feel like this!

    tumblr_m24ah33rZb1qezhfh_zps5115dae1.jpg
  • heroyalslimness
    heroyalslimness Posts: 591 Member
    Options
    Anyone can be my friend if they bring a couple of c-notes and a kilo of Snickers (with almonds).:love:

    Plus you have to tell me what the below 70's song --is.


    I KNOW YOU'RE WORK-IN--for the C-I-A.

    THEY WOULDN'T HAVE YOU IN THE MAF---I----YAAAAAAY
  • Silver_Star
    Silver_Star Posts: 1,351 Member
    Options
    I dont care what people write in their messages...although some of them are pretty funny actually....its just a "hello" to me...

    I have had friend requests where the person has actually copy pasted a STEAMY hot bit from an erotic ebook.:blushing:

    so yeah.. some screening is required.
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,862 Member
    Options
    It just occurred to my while reading this thread how much MFP is like high school with friend collectors, socialites, nerds and bullies.
  • djsupreme6
    djsupreme6 Posts: 1,210 Member
    Options
    initially I will accept anybody...no messages needed and all that...its nice to get one but not a dealbreaker...as far as an ED well I can't diagnose those, maybe some people like to keep their cal intake low which can happen if somebody is small in stature. Eventually with support maybe they will increase it or at least feel comfortable enough. Some don't log everything and I know this...what I do want is a friend who is active, you don't have to comment on everything or clog up the newsfeed but just be there and of course you gotta do some kind of workout
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    Options
    Would you walk up next to a person and not say a word and expect them to consider you a friend? Same thing here.

    If I just walked up to you and started touching your pecs, would you consider me a friend?

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    Options
    It has been a deterrent in requesting someone to be a friend.

    It also sucks to have someone accept your friend request and with the same click of the mouse delete you so I will value the friends I have made on here but highly unlikely I will be requesting any new friends.

    I can understand the cool peeps here having too many friends and not really in the market for new ones because having a high list can be a full time job keeping up with everyone plus they want to give their attention to those who give it to them, it just makes me sad that I joined so late in the game.

    I felt that way too a year and half or so ago. You'll find your crowd... or they'll find you.
  • Aquarian
    Aquarian Posts: 1,094 Member
    Options
    I don't really go and add people unless I happen to read a post or blog by them and I felt inspired or impressed. I sometimes give a message with my request, sometimes I don't. And I don't mind if people don't accept me or delete me. I keep my diary private because I don't like to think anybody would care to look at my daily meals (that seems intrusive to me), and I don't look at people's diaries either (unless someone asked me to). I eat when I am hungry, I comment if I feel like it and I don't talk to all my friends on a daily or even weekly basis. If a friendship can last with all this, it will be worth it.

    I don't make a bunch of conditions in real life to be friends with someone, and I don't expect my real life friends to live the way I do. I think similarity of interests is over-rated! :)
  • spade117
    spade117 Posts: 2,466 Member
    Options
    If I just walked up to you and started touching your pecs, would you consider me a friend?

    I'd touch yours back.

    I approve of this friendship.


    :stands around waiting with pecs hanging out:

    ohheyyyy

    can anyone join this pec touching party?
    If you share some of that beer, yes.
  • Darkskinned88
    Darkskinned88 Posts: 1,177 Member
    Options
    It really isnt that deep, its free to add me, free to delete me, but then again im not here for "motivation" per se but rather my own accountability, the social aspect is just entertainment
  • MissTattoo
    MissTattoo Posts: 1,203 Member
    Options
    I only ask that people send me a note with the request. It's not an extra step, the option is there. I think it's rude to send blind friend request. Also, I'm not going to be friends with people with ED or are pro ana. Sorry, I don't want to see you and your 80lb friends beating up each other about the extra piece of lettuce that you had.
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    Options
    I want people who are 1) serious/dedicated 2) people who are on a similar level as me 3) people who have similar goals as me.
  • LadyIvysMom
    LadyIvysMom Posts: 391 Member
    Options
    I don’t really have any stipulations for adding friends.

    But if people start to get on my nerves for some reason, I will delete them off my list. If they annoy me on the forums I heart the little “ignore user” button.

    As a rule, I try not to add people who have no sense of humor, take everything too personally or who lecture me about doing a low calorie diet.

    I do have numerous friends on my list with EDs. I keep my low cal food diary locked for that reason, so as not to trigger anyone.
  • sexikc
    sexikc Posts: 153 Member
    Options
    I dont understand it either...but I have sent FR and put a message because the person asked and it was no big deal, I still dont get it. I am not tryin to be a friend collector per se but if I collect a bunch of friends so be it. I will still interact with the people who interact with me, even the ones who never say anything to me I will comment on their status if I have time and want to. I like haveing a variety of friends with a variety of goals and a variety of stragtegies. I am not uptight about MFP. No one on my friend list is going to prevent me from reaching my goals just becasue they have a different strategy.

Categories