So at what weight do women actually respond to a guy?

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  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    it isn't a confidence thing. I've known a vast array of confident men who got rejected.
    My own bf is tall and rail-thin, and isn't confident...he's still hot to me.
    I'd say it's the type of women.

    Not sure I can make it to rail thin.
  • Rawr1978
    Rawr1978 Posts: 245 Member
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    lol! no! I didn't mean that!
    I was NOT into skinny guys before him, and I'd love it if he gained 20lbs.
    im on my phone, so reading through 20 pages isn't possible...what type of woman are you approaching?
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    lol! no! I didn't mean that!
    I was NOT into skinny guys before him, and I'd love it if he gained 20lbs.
    im on my phone, so reading through 20 pages isn't possible...what type of woman are you approaching?

    Completely average ones. I don't really go to clubs so these are just sports bar type girls.
  • Rawr1978
    Rawr1978 Posts: 245 Member
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    im going to share a story.
    Back when I was single, I went to an event. I had this guy come up to me- balding (didn't matter, I've liked bald guys), pudgy (dated those), and I wont say unattractive, just not someone who set MY pulse ablaze. "thanks for the interest, but im kinda really busy." That was his opening statement to me. I did the whole wtf? thing, and he smiled, said "I thought that would get your attention." I did laugh, it was a pretty clever (if not outright weird) way to approach someone. He proved he was confident, yay for him. It was when I didn't go for him after that, he got pissy.
    Confidence isn't always the ticket...but a lot of people think it is.
    Being sweet and having a unique "cuteness" trait is.
  • Rawr1978
    Rawr1978 Posts: 245 Member
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    k, so you aren't going for super-hotties? Well, average chics can be even worse *sigh*.
    My close friend had the same problem for a long time. he wasn't ugly, he was very confident, and went for entirely average girls...got nothing.
    you have me stymied.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
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    0lbs.
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    im going to share a story.
    Back when I was single, I went to an event. I had this guy come up to me- balding (didn't matter, I've liked bald guys), pudgy (dated those), and I wont say unattractive, just not someone who set MY pulse ablaze. "thanks for the interest, but im kinda really busy." That was his opening statement to me. I did the whole wtf? thing, and he smiled, said "I thought that would get your attention." I did laugh, it was a pretty clever (if not outright weird) way to approach someone. He proved he was confident, yay for him. It was when I didn't go for him after that, he got pissy.
    Confidence isn't always the ticket...but a lot of people think it is.
    Being sweet and having a unique "cuteness" trait is.

    Hmm it just seems like women see this "cuteness' trait is in the same cookie cutter mold of guys though. That's the problem lol. Or rather that I don't fit the mold I guess.
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    k, so you aren't going for super-hotties? Well, average chics can be even worse *sigh*.
    My close friend had the same problem for a long time. he wasn't ugly, he was very confident, and went for entirely average girls...got nothing.
    you have me stymied.

    LOL so try super hot ones then? Someone did PM to say ask out the hottest girls because they tend to have low self esteem (his words not mine). I dunno though. You NEVER see a really super hot girl with a guy that's not a walking set of abs.
  • AyaKara
    AyaKara Posts: 220
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    OP, I'd first like to say that the woman that rejected you was ****ed up in all senses of the word. I would never reject a person like that, whether it was for romantic interests or not. I absolutely cannot with rude & superficial people. Ugh.

    Weight does not matter to me. Sex, race, religion . . . It doesn't mean that someone is a human being over the other. Every person is different in that sense -- I'm interested in reading the responses to this thread to see what others think.

    You'll find a significant other soon enough, OP, & she will absolutely love you for who you are & you'll be mindblown at her existence. Keep taking care of your health, ignore the haters, & you'll have an amazing woman fall right into your life one day just as you'll fall into hers! :heart:
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    0lbs.

    Sweet! I'll let you know how tomorrow works out ;)
  • Rawr1978
    Rawr1978 Posts: 245 Member
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    "unique" cuteness trait. Meaning that he has a talent, a quirk that makes him utterly adorable.
    My bf's trait is that he's a prototypical geek. He discovered this, and used it.
    What is your main hobby?
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    "unique" cuteness trait. Meaning that he has a talent, a quirk that makes him utterly adorable.
    My bf's trait is that he's a prototypical geek. He discovered this, and used it.
    What is your main hobby?

    I'd say movies, PC games, reading, playing bored games with friends, going out with friends. I go to the gym every day though since I'm trying to lose weight so my hobby time has kind of thinned out.
  • Rawr1978
    Rawr1978 Posts: 245 Member
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    try dating sites?
  • willwillywilson
    willwillywilson Posts: 229
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    try dating sites?

    LOL The women that write to me randomly are heavier than I am (sorry that's kind of my one rule, I'm the guy, I'm supposed to be bigger than you). Almost everyone I write to never writes back. The ones that have writen back, most of them have had random issues that explained why they're on a dating site. One didn't have a car. Several lived at home with parents (yes they were close to my age). That's kind of the perception I have of online dating now. A lot of posters before mentioned how women don't like men that seem desperate. Well it's a two way street LOL. I want to meet a normal girl the normal way like every other guy.
  • cindl24
    cindl24 Posts: 178
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    try dating sites?

    LOL The women that write to me randomly are heavier than I am (sorry that's kind of my one rule, I'm the guy, I'm supposed to be bigger than you). Almost everyone I write to never writes back. The ones that have writen back, most of them have had random issues that explained why they're on a dating site. One didn't have a car. Several lived at home with parents (yes they were close to my age). That's kind of the perception I have of online dating now. A lot of posters before mentioned how women don't like men that seem desperate. Well it's a two way street LOL. I want to meet a normal girl the normal way like every other guy.

    Again, y'all are giving me some good chuckles. I have had some bad experiences on those sites too. The worst is when people tell you they are very different from reality. (Meaning they post a picture showing them about 180 pounds and they are really 280. Ugh.

    The only other thing I can guess is that usually the guys that try to pick people up in bars are kind of smarmy and interested in a one-night-stand. While it is ridiculous that you were brushed off, perhaps that was what happened. Regardless, good luck! You'll find someone who is right for you.
  • marvelprime
    marvelprime Posts: 91 Member
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    It shouldn't matter on the weight, and if they don't respond then I think it's honestly the gals loss. Yes, everyone has a specific vanity, but eventually there is always someone that will match up.

    Also, it's not a dating site unless you get at least one Nigerian scam lol.
  • obsidianwings
    obsidianwings Posts: 1,237 Member
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    try dating sites?

    LOL The women that write to me randomly are heavier than I am (sorry that's kind of my one rule, I'm the guy, I'm supposed to be bigger than you).
    So you now admit you judge women on their weight to, after a crap load of pages whinging about them doing the same to you. LOL
  • ihateroses
    ihateroses Posts: 893 Member
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    LOL The women that write to me randomly are heavier than I am (sorry that's kind of my one rule, I'm the guy, I'm supposed to be bigger than you).

    Iroooonyyyyyy! (+ hypocrisy)

    (edited for sad sad spelling error :/)
  • dawn2313
    dawn2313 Posts: 125 Member
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    try dating sites?

    LOL The women that write to me randomly are heavier than I am (sorry that's kind of my one rule, I'm the guy, I'm supposed to be bigger than you).

    You have your rules, and some women have theirs. It's normal not to attract every person you hit on. (Just like those girls randomly writing you didn't attract you.)

    But to answer your question, I don't think it's going to happen at a certain "weight", It's just timing and compatibility. Just try meeting them a different way I guess, approaching them a different way, I dunno. Be funny. Funny=sexy.

    Good luck!
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
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    Earlier advice stands then. Join some different groups based on a hobby or interest. Develop friendships with a wider range of people (not just attractive women) because those people are going to know single women. And women are more comfortable with meeting and talking to someone their friends know. It's way better than just some random guy in a bar. Also, did someone mention you have a dog? Take the dog with you a lot of places, people will approach you.

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