So at what weight do women actually respond to a guy?

fitpilatesqueen

There can be so many reasons. Women are complicated just like to us men are complicated.
For example. I would probably walk away not because of your weight or personality, I would walk away simply because men scare the hell out of me, nothing I can control but I get this I´m sufficating of fear feeling.

Just don´t let the wrong ones stop you from walking up to a woman and talk to her.

willwillywilson

for the wrong girls, the weight of your wallet. so, load it up with stones and let them hold it.

What's the old joke? Girls are like condoms. More time in your wallet than on your...well you know.

hope8311

I'll be honest whenever someone approached me, I would never turn them away or make them feel bad...(I was always commited so never was rude, let the guys speak b4 telling them I was taken).

But I did notice some guys were not confident enough and had a hard time feeling comfortable...

Confidence is a key, and remember theres a difference between confidence and being cocky....

hope8311

Oh and stick in there you seem like a nice guy so don't worry or dwell so much on it...your day will come... I'm sure of it.

kvossandrews

Change your mind set.

It is their loss if they walk away.

They are not worth your time.

xoxoxoxoxoxox

CallMeCupcakeDammit

I dated a guy who was around 300 lbs. He was very confident and fun to be with, so I really didn't even "see" his weight. I have a friend who is about the same size who complains about not being able to meet anyone, because all they see is his weight. I think what they really see is his negativity and low self-confidence. Self-confidence is a pretty big turn-on. Don't mistake being confident with being a douche, and you'll eventually meet the right girl.

ncahill77

Depends on what you want man, most of the girls looking for the super hot guy are looking for a self esteem boost, if you are just looking for a short "fun" ride around the block with one of them and you have a very short time frame to make an impression you basically have to not give a sh1t what they think and you have to make sure they know you don't care while not being a total @ss at the same time. That being said you strike me as the type who is actually looking for a caring person and that my friend is sometimes hard, just let your personality shine through with people you meet and actually have a chance to interact with for more than a few seconds.

CressidaJL

Firstly, MASSIVE KUDOS to the (sadly, very few) posters who mentioned that different people are attracted to different things. My faith in humanity has been somewhat restored, so thanks for that.

Having said which, there are a LOT of really unpalatable posts on this thread, including the OP's. Treating all women as if they're the same; as if there's one thing we all find attractive (be it a certain weight, hairstyle, build, age, height, etc) is massively insulting. Take the replies stating things like: 'fat women are nicer than skinny ones' (No, they're not! Some are, some aren't, but you cannot generalise like that!) and 'women like confidence, but hate arrogance' (Who the hell are you to tell me what I like? I happen to LOVE arrogance!). Wow. Just, wow. *slow-hand clap*

To the OP: My genuine advice would be to try - and bear with me here - approaching someone you like the look of as an individual, because you want to chat to them, to get to know them, without the underlying motivation of a getting laid. Approaching a woman because you've lost some weight so now she has no reason to turn you down is an incredibly unattractive attitude, and I would suggest that it's that rather than anything at all to do with what you weigh that is your problem.

if you have a hot body and are a douche, you will still be lonely.

^^^^^ Yeah, basically this. ^^^^^

smokedragon97

Also realize, not everyone is confident in themselves either - it could be that she turned away because she was trying to find confidence in herself to talk to you too; but when she turned back around, you were already walking away.... If it's a bar, continue to the bar, order a drink, and start a conversation, if she is interested - she'll talk, if she's not interested, then she'll most likely turn away or turn you down then.

I don't know the setup, but don't forget, just because you were looking at someone doesn't give us the telepathy to let us know "hey, I want to talk to you" - we cannot read minds. Unless you open your mouth to say something; we don't know if you just happened to be walking by and glancing at us or what. I can not tell you how many guys I thought was going to approach me and say something, and I say "hello, hi are you doing?" and they keep walking.... just open you mouth and say something. And if she is not interested, don't take it to heart and keep looking for someone who is.

meshashesha2012

dudes are crazy in this thread :laugh:

for me personally, the weight isn't going to be a factor in whether or not i talk to a guy or not, provided he's confident and has a personality, but it will more than likely make a difference in whether or not i'd be physically attracted to him or not.

i tend to prefer my mancandy fuller and fluffier, so for me the but off would be if he seemed like he wasn't healthy enough or had enough stamina. for instance if dude can barely walk up a flight of stairs without needing oxygen, what the hell am i going to do with him? :laugh:

what can i say, i'm shallow. but sex and cuddling *to me* is largely based on physical attraction since that stuff involves rubbing bodies together, not rubbing minds, personality, senses of humor etc. . i'm not a hypocrite either because i dont take it personally when guys might not find me physically attractive because of my size.

UsedToBeHusky

I love you, friend. You're not trying to talk to the right women.

Honestly, I seemed to get more attention when I was over 300 lbs, but it's possible that I have been so focused on myself lately that I haven't noticed. But as a single mom with a teenager, odds are that I'm just not getting out enough.

swarovski75

Its ALL about how you carry yourself. I'll admit I like someone who is easy on the eyes, but for me that means a really, really great smile, or sometimes, really beautiful eyes. I'll admit I've never dated a guy above 210 lbs or so (at 6'7") but no one heavier than that has ever approached me?

I'm all about humour, confidence, and personality. :-)

Nerdy_Rose

I just don't talk to anyone in bars, regardless of weight, height, gender, or anything else. I'm pretty mean about it too.

swarovski75

I just don't talk to anyone in bars, regardless of weight, height, gender, or anything else. I'm pretty mean about it too.

Hmm, yeah, and that. ^^ Where are you meeting girls? Because I have been told that when I'm in bars, the *kitten* off vibe I send out is pretty unmistakeable. I don't like being approached by anyone in bars, whether they're pretty to look at or not.

littlesis412

You're walking up to the wrong girls.

My advice is to make them laugh! "If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything" -Marilyn Monroe
Seriously though, I'll be honest and say my boyfriend isn't model material but he makes me laugh even when I'm crying and I wouldn't trade him for the world.

Being a millionaire athlete worked well with her also btw

Lol, good point. Just citing the source.

freckles_cmj

You're walking up to the wrong girls.

^^^ this

strawberrytoast

You're walking up to the wrong girls.

Agreed too!

Nerdy_Rose

I just don't talk to anyone in bars, regardless of weight, height, gender, or anything else. I'm pretty mean about it too.

Hmm, yeah, and that. ^^ Where are you meeting girls? Because I have been told that when I'm in bars, the *kitten* off vibe I send out is pretty unmistakeable. I don't like being approached by anyone in bars, whether they're pretty to look at or not.

Yup. In general, I'm pretty friendly and talkative (like at my rock gym), but at bars I'm always with my friends (whom I don't get to see often) and I assume any man who approaches me in a bar is just trying to sleep with me. 99.9% of the time this is the case.

In one instance, I was mildly friendly to a guy in a bar, who then proceeded to get nasty and ask me weird questions, and I told him to go away, pretty forcefully, and he continued to harass me. Experiences like this lead me to either ignore men who approach me in the bar scene, or tell them to eff off.

Erisad

My bf is 6'1" and about 250 pounds, so he has a bit of a belly. I still find him attractive, he approached me though. It was his confidence that caught my attention.

teresa_c

this is an interesting thread. here's my two cents. the bar/club scene...in that environment it's all about looks looks looks...women (and men) spend a bunch of time getting themselves looking good and then it's like a flock of birds displaying their plumage vying for attention...attracting it...rejecting it...confidence might work in this situation (I guess it does for birds apparently) but really the whole thing is so superficial that it's a miracle anyone gets anywhere meaningful doing it...

that being said, if you happen to find yourself in a bar that's not a meat market/mating ritual personified...try approaching a girl in a relaxed way and comment on something you noticed about her, like what's she's drinking or ask her if she's ever been there before or whatever. Frankly, I was raised to be respectful and answer if someone is talking to me...but if a guy is obviously hitting on me in a gross way or being all cocky weird, I'm going to be looking for a way out. But if someone is making friendly conversation with me, hell, I'm game. Well, I WAS game, I'm an old married woman now...

ali_b83

Just my opinion, but I've always noticed a guy's personality, face, and smile over weight. It's pretty hard to tell how much some guys weigh anyhow. I totally agree with you approaching the wrong girls as well. That's just rude, immature behavior on their part.

tigerblood78

for me....it got a WHOLE lot easier around 225

CindyJ004

You're walking up to the wrong girls.

AlsDonkBoxSquat

I don't have an answer. I dated men of all shapes and sizes, but I do have my preferences, and one of them is self confidence. I was always big in giving huge hints that I was interested with eye contact, and more eye contact, and them more eye contact.

Dawnymaries

My ex was about 240. I don't care at all.

You should try to meet a lady somewhere else.

NJSunshine13

If the women you are talking to won't give you the time of day and are rude and walk away, then count your blessings because they aren't women you want to be friends with. Find better women.

LittleBallofFurr

You're walking up to the wrong girls.

THIS!! Its the inside that counts, anyone that cant see past the exterior is not worth your time. Let it happen when it happens hun

AuddAlise

Before getting married I dated many guys of varying size and height. One of the most memorable was a Mexican man that was 6 feet tall and about 340 lbs. He had the best personality, made me laugh all the time, we had tons in common and he looked like an Aztec God! I didn't care how much he weighed because we clicked.

Oh, and I was 5'7" and 115lbs. I bet we looked like a crazy odd couple.

You need to talk to the right women.

christine24t

One of my biggest crushes was on an overweight guy.

Like others suggest, you might be be choosing the wrong women. Pick the girls who aren't the ones getting all the attention and you might have better luck.

AntWrig

I don't workout to appeal to others. The only person I care about is the man in the mirror.