An observation about MFP posters...

WendyTerry420

It's been that way since I joined. It seems to mostly be the members following some strict diet protocol, whether it's vegan or Paleo or eat X grams of protein, and the "look at my abs! If you don't eat like me you'll be skinny fat and never look good naked" crowd.

Those that are really just here to improve/maintain weight and health are usually pretty supportive.

There are paleo people like this? Where? I've been here over a year and haven't found any like that...and I've been looking for them. Please provide a list of names so I can send them FRs.

Ha Ha

I think most of the original people that made my ignore list were paleo folks who made the most ludicrous claims that I refuse to see anything they type ever again. :laugh:

leylarna

I find that, if the comment isn't helpful (positive or critical) and not meant to be so then I ignore it. Pointless wasting energy on trolls.

KatLifter

I see a lot of that too. I think there are 2 reasons for it:

1) People who are successful can start to think they know everything, and bash people who are going about it in a different way.
2) A lot of people are insecure, and that can be transferred into happily anonymous snarky-ness.

I just take people's opinions with a grain of salt, and when I have a real question, turn to a professional. There are SO many great (And free) resources out there.

I noticed a lot of people in category 1. I find them irritating.

I don't find it any nastier than other internet forums I'm on though. It's the nature of the internet

So you think people who have finally succeed in hitting their goal are irritating or, are you irritated they hit their goal and you may have not?

This site is for anyone who wants to use it. We don't all have to like each other or get along but comments like that are just rude. I hit my goal two weeks ago but am still striving for more improvement and support people at any place along their path. that's my choice.

I find your comment judgemental and I feel bad for you that you can't be happy for those who reached their goal. You might find yourself with less people who would've been happy for you when you reach yours.

I'm absolutely not irritated by people who have met their goal, I'm really happy for them!
I said people "CAN". We all go about it in different ways and different things work for different people. I've just seen that when one person is successful by one method, they put down people who are using another method. For me, it's some trial and error to see what works best.

blues4miles

OP, that's the primary reason I stay out of the forums. People can be so ugly. I think it's just a sign of the disease that is poor living; i.e. bad diet, lack of exercise, etc.. Everything seems to take on a negative spin when someone feels bad about themselves. When we feel bad physically or emotionally, even someone else's joy can be perceived as negative. I just try to avoid threads that could bring negative comments. It's hard to bite my tongue when someone is acting like a clown. lol!

I too stay out of forums. I'm afraid that someone will make a harsh remark towards me and deter my weight loss. I know I should not give them the "power" but I do!

If one person's snarky remark is enough to cause you to miss your goals, there are other things you should be focusing on darlin.

I think she aknowledged that.

I know I should not give them the "power" but I do!

IamBlackMamba

I see a lot of that too. I think there are 2 reasons for it:

1) People who are successful can start to think they know everything, and bash people who are going about it in a different way.
2) A lot of people are insecure, and that can be transferred into happily anonymous snarky-ness.

I just take people's opinions with a grain of salt, and when I have a real question, turn to a professional. There are SO many great (And free) resources out there.

I noticed a lot of people in category 1. I find them irritating.

I don't find it any nastier than other internet forums I'm on though. It's the nature of the internet

So you think people who have finally succeed in hitting their goal are irritating or, are you irritated they hit their goal and you may have not?

This site is for anyone who wants to use it. We don't all have to like each other or get along but comments like that are just rude. I hit my goal two weeks ago but am still striving for more improvement and support people at any place along their path. that's my choice.

I find your comment judgemental and I feel bad for you that you can't be happy for those who reached their goal. You might find yourself with less people who would've been happy for you when you reach yours.

Also not sure if serious...

If so, the problem wasn't/isn't with people that have met their goals - it's that *certain* people that have met their goals only use the anecdotal evidence that what they did that worked for them is the ONLY way to go.

whatever that's just that one lady

I actually am serious, are is Yoovie and Brett...They were here long before me and I've seen their progress and sustained success as well as struggles, just like everyone else's.

That is just one lady... yes do keep that in mind

The 'snark' as you call it is just that, what YOU choose call it. The formula is simple but it takes hard work, dedication and support. There is no majic pill, no cheating (in general-let's skip the Thanksgiving dramatics for a moment) and not secret. It can be just as irritating for those of us who see the same threads day after day looking for a quick answer, special diets, etc., that someone is hiding when in it's basic form it's simple math:

A+B-C=D

jofjltncb6

It's been that way since I joined. It seems to mostly be the members following some strict diet protocol, whether it's vegan or Paleo or eat X grams of protein, and the "look at my abs! If you don't eat like me you'll be skinny fat and never look good naked" crowd.

Those that are really just here to improve/maintain weight and health are usually pretty supportive.

There are paleo people like this? Where? I've been here over a year and haven't found any like that...and I've been looking for them. Please provide a list of names so I can send them FRs.

Ha Ha

I think most of the original people that made my ignore list were paleo folks who made the most ludicrous claims that I refuse to see anything they type ever again. :laugh:

*twitch*

JohnMessmer

I tend to agree with the OP. Find a thread where anyone has used any generalization to make their point and you will find someone who has taken offense to that generalization. I posted a comment once to the effect of "We are all such experts, that must be why we are overweight and out of shape", sure enough along comes "speak for yourself I am in the best shape of my life and run 20 miles a day and...". In this very thread there is another example: "1.People who are successful can start to think they know everything, and bash people who are going about it in a different way." Response: "So you think people who have finally succeed in hitting their goal are irritating or, are you irritated they hit their goal and you may have not?

This site is for anyone who wants to use it. We don't all have to like each other or get along but comments like that are just rude. I hit my goal two weeks ago but am still striving for more improvement and support people at any place along their path. that's my choice.

I find your comment judgmental and I feel bad for you that you can't be happy for those who reached their goal. You might find yourself with less people who would've been happy for you when you reach yours."

Not only has someone taken offense to the comment, but they respond by attacking the poster of the comment.

Unfortunately people do not have to act nice, or even civil, towards each other online; although I think that may be one of Obama's plans for job growth "Internet Civil Obedience Patrol, or I COP" :bigsmile:

iAMsmiling

It's been that way since I joined. It seems to mostly be the members following some strict diet protocol, whether it's vegan or Paleo or eat X grams of protein, and the "look at my abs! If you don't eat like me you'll be skinny fat and never look good naked" crowd.

Those that are really just here to improve/maintain weight and health are usually pretty supportive.

There are paleo people like this? Where? I've been here over a year and haven't found any like that...and I've been looking for them. Please provide a list of names so I can send them FRs.

Ha Ha

I think most of the original people that made my ignore list were paleo folks who made the most ludicrous claims that I refuse to see anything they type ever again. :laugh:

*twitch*

Their he goes.

jofjltncb6

It's been that way since I joined. It seems to mostly be the members following some strict diet protocol, whether it's vegan or Paleo or eat X grams of protein, and the "look at my abs! If you don't eat like me you'll be skinny fat and never look good naked" crowd.

Those that are really just here to improve/maintain weight and health are usually pretty supportive.

There are paleo people like this? Where? I've been here over a year and haven't found any like that...and I've been looking for them. Please provide a list of names so I can send them FRs.

Here is 2,165 of them: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/37-primal-paleo-support-group

Oh, I know about that group. I just haven't seen the behavior mentioned above from them. Perhaps I just need to read into their messages more closely.

brentrhodes

OP, that's the primary reason I stay out of the forums. People can be so ugly. I think it's just a sign of the disease that is poor living; i.e. bad diet, lack of exercise, etc.. Everything seems to take on a negative spin when someone feels bad about themselves. When we feel bad physically or emotionally, even someone else's joy can be perceived as negative. I just try to avoid threads that could bring negative comments. It's hard to bite my tongue when someone is acting like a clown. lol!

^^This guy is a freakin genius!

Finally! Someone gets me! Haha!

IamBlackMamba

I think there are the tough love types....you know sometimes we really need to hear the hard and fast truth, and be willing to accept it in order to make the change.

Then there are the types that really want to help, but have issues in their own lives that can cause a post to seem abrupt or even mean, or have their messages get out of hand because they have difficulty letting go of their own issues.

Then there are the trolls. These guys (and girls) are on lots of sites and are just out to hurt and be mean. This is often intentional, and they get their jollies out of it.

I haven't seen too many trolls here thankfully.

I guess the best thing you can do is either take the best out of the post you can or ignore it. But it's not a bad idea to think about why a particular post bothers you. I find that when I'm particularly upset about something someone says, it's because I recognize that there is some truth to it and it's usually some work I need to do about how I feel about the comment (not necessarily about the comment itself)...for example, I got very upset when I got called a fat pig. I realized that was how I thought about myself, and it hurt that someone else called me what I thought about myself. Now I know I'm not a pig, but in all honesty, with more than 100 lbs to lose, yes, I am fat! That is fact so now that comment doesn't bother me. Now I'm doing something about it, so that comment generally wouldn't bother me anymore, though others might.

If you find this forum valuable, don't let anything drive you away. Report a post if you need to, ignore it if that's possible, examine it if you think there is value....

^^^^ People like this are why I am here and stay here! GO YOU!

DCpaleochick

I hope you realize that you just asked them to come introduce themselves.

^^^^^yup This

cubizzle

stacy_1971

MFP is just a slice of real life. Some people are nice, and some are *kitten*. You take what you want and leave the rest.

^^ Exactly. Chew the meat and spit out the bones.

One caveat, though: Reading someone's writing versus hearing their speech leads to different interpretations of the same comments. I bet if the "mean" comments were said to you and you were not reading them, they might come across differently.

gkwatra

I like ice-cream!

Are you going to eat some on Thanksgiving because OMG Iam so worried about what I am going to do Thursday!!!

OMG you'll need to go on a 5-day cleanse and drink nothing but prune juice for 3 days after that to purge the evil .... :laugh:

infamousmk

In the good 'ol days, I would have replied: tl;dr.

In the New World Butthurt days, I reply: check his text messages.

tristahenry

See what happened here? Fun ain't it?

NormalSaneFLGuy

It's all perception. Things are always "better" the first time.

Ever go on vacation and say "this place is amazing," then go back a second time and think "hmm it was better before." It's why sequels are almost never as good as the originals - you already know what to expect, so there is less surprise and adventure the second go round. It's in your head. Plus people typically don't remember the bad things. This is why people will date their ex-boyfriend/girlfriend 5 years later - they forgot all the little things they hated about them and just remember the general good things. Here, at the end of the day, the good far outweighs the bad.

yoovie

OP, that's the primary reason I stay out of the forums. People can be so ugly. I think it's just a sign of the disease that is poor living; i.e. bad diet, lack of exercise, etc.. Everything seems to take on a negative spin when someone feels bad about themselves. When we feel bad physically or emotionally, even someone else's joy can be perceived as negative. I just try to avoid threads that could bring negative comments. It's hard to bite my tongue when someone is acting like a clown. lol!

I too stay out of forums. I'm afraid that someone will make a harsh remark towards me and deter my weight loss. I know I should not give them the "power" but I do!

If one person's snarky remark is enough to cause you to miss your goals, there are other things you should be focusing on darlin.

I think she aknowledged that.

I know I should not give them the "power" but I do!

Just out of curiosity - do you have the same job as Sigourney Weaver on Galaxy Quest? Youd be great at it.

tashjs21

I get what you are saying. When I joined MFP 4 years ago (maybe closer to 5) the community was much smaller and therefore people were more polite because it wasn't as anonymous as it is now. It was more of a close family. MFP has definitely grown over the years and with that you get more of all types.

Just seek out people that are cool and follow them around on the boards. Welcome back. :flowerforyou: