When a Guy Says I Want a Woman That Takes Care of Her Body
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If you're an active guy and love to work out 4-5 times a week it's unlikely you are going to be compatible with someone who would rather sit in all day and eat junk food on the coach. If that makes me shallow then so be it, IDGAF.
So, if they're eating junk food on the coach, isn't that the first step to getting into the gym?
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I HATE HATE HATE!!!! that "curvy" means "fat." I have always been curvy, I will always be curvy. I have been as small as a size 3 and as large as a size 12 and was curvy all the way. It's called "I have hips and boobs"!!!!!
/rant
Anyway, as far as talking to a guy about your weight loss efforts, it's not pre-first-date conversation. Sorry. Once you know each other well and are moving to the next stage, sure. But not in a first contact message.
Amen. I hate that curvy has become a code word for fat. Hate to break it to you boys, but girls who have a naturally big chest are (9 times out of 10) going to have some hips. Those little girls you see with really big boobs? They are fake most of the time. That's nature.0 -
My boyfriend is active, he's pretty fit and, to me, he's handsome as hell! However, I've dated personal trainers in the past that are ripped as hell and most women would want to jump them in a second.
His ex was a fitness model. When I asked him why he chose me instead of other women, his answer was simple: "At first, I wanted to get to know you. I found you attractive and you have a really sexy smile. We both love footie (soccer). The main reason is you work out and aren't a lazy couch potatoe. Most women say they are active and workout but they don't do anything else but go to the gym a couple times a week and say they're active. With you, you go almost every day and you walk your dog and are willing to play sports, not a lot of women are like that."
I've been told by guys if she's 'fat' (I use that term loosely and I appologize if I've offended anyone) I don't want to be with her because she can't keep up with me.0 -
I'm overweight (size 16/5'9) and I've tried dating sites as well. People have their preferences. The only thing I get upset about is if I do reach out with a message and I get something hateful in return.
For instance, I sent a man a message and he replied 'Thanks, I'm flattered, but you're not really my type/I'm not physically attracted to you' <
This is a-ok in my book!
On the flip side, I've sent messages and gotten replies about how I should have my head examined for thinking a hot guy would go for a fat slob like me. Or to message them when I've lost 100lbs and 'good luck with that'0 -
This^^guys dont want to know about your weight loss journey... thats why you dont get replies...0 -
It means "no fatties" but in way nicer words.0
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It means he wants a woman who is not overweight.0
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I HATE HATE HATE!!!! that "curvy" means "fat." I have always been curvy, I will always be curvy. I have been as small as a size 3 and as large as a size 12 and was curvy all the way. It's called "I have hips and boobs"!!!!!
/rant
Anyway, as far as talking to a guy about your weight loss efforts, it's not pre-first-date conversation. Sorry. Once you know each other well and are moving to the next stage, sure. But not in a first contact message.
Amen. I hate that curvy has become a code word for fat. Hate to break it to you boys, but girls who have a naturally big chest are (9 times out of 10) going to have some hips. Those little girls you see with really big boobs? They are fake most of the time. That's nature.
I should clarify that I've never had a problem attracting men. But how do I describe myself? When people see "thin" or "athletic," they picture straight up and down. And "curvy" means overweight. There is no "thin with natural curves" option.0 -
Ok, Here's my take. I was on dating sites for years until I found my husband.
It's tough out there to find the person you want to be with, and the person who also wants to be with you. Don't get your hopes pinned to one introductory email to a person who may or may not be who they say they are either in the profile or the pics. I used to spend an hour tailoring emails to the specific guy, agonizing over each one I sent only to be crushed when I get no response to a really thoughtful and entertaining message.
Combat this by creating one or two medium length generic emails you can send out to a bunch of guys you find attractive. Trust me, guys do this all the time. Just cuz you send the email doesn't mean you can't later change your mind about meeting the person. So send out 20 of these suckers to guys you find interesting and you will definitely get a response. Also, about the "takes care of herself" thing, I'd ignore it. You are taking care of yourself. You're dieting and exercising. I think pretty much all guys want a girl who takes care of herself, but that definition is different for each guy. So create the emails, don't mention the diet/exercise in them- if you feel you have to, just say "I stay active" until such time as he wants to discuss workout regimens.
You may or may not have exercise in common anyway. Some guys just put that phrase on their profiles cuz they don't want a woman who's confined to a wheelchair, not cuz they are gym buffs.
Just my take.0 -
It's code for "hot" just like when women say they want a man "with goals in life" or who is "successful" they really just mean a man with money.
^^ THIS!!!0 -
I HATE HATE HATE!!!! that "curvy" means "fat." I have always been curvy, I will always be curvy. I have been as small as a size 3 and as large as a size 12 and was curvy all the way. It's called "I have hips and boobs"!!!!!
/rant
Anyway, as far as talking to a guy about your weight loss efforts, it's not pre-first-date conversation. Sorry. Once you know each other well and are moving to the next stage, sure. But not in a first contact message.
Amen. I hate that curvy has become a code word for fat. Hate to break it to you boys, but girls who have a naturally big chest are (9 times out of 10) going to have some hips. Those little girls you see with really big boobs? They are fake most of the time. That's nature.
I should clarify that I've never had a problem attracting men. But how do I describe myself? When people see "thin" or "athletic," they picture straight up and down. And "curvy" means overweight. There is no "thin with natural curves" option.
Exactly. Fit with curves. I'm a size 6. Hardly fat. But there isn't really an option for that.0 -
I HATE HATE HATE!!!! that "curvy" means "fat." I have always been curvy, I will always be curvy. I have been as small as a size 3 and as large as a size 12 and was curvy all the way. It's called "I have hips and boobs"!!!!!
/rant
Anyway, as far as talking to a guy about your weight loss efforts, it's not pre-first-date conversation. Sorry. Once you know each other well and are moving to the next stage, sure. But not in a first contact message.
Amen. I hate that curvy has become a code word for fat. Hate to break it to you boys, but girls who have a naturally big chest are (9 times out of 10) going to have some hips. Those little girls you see with really big boobs? They are fake most of the time. That's nature.
I should clarify that I've never had a problem attracting men. But how do I describe myself? When people see "thin" or "athletic," they picture straight up and down. And "curvy" means overweight. There is no "thin with natural curves" option.
Use a picture. The English language for body description has been pretty much annihilated by euphemisms lol . . .0 -
They are shallow men who just want one thing from a woman. That simple.
That's a ridiculous generalization.f course i like hot women, but the body to me isn't that important.
My friend on the other hand all he talks about is body, he doesn't care about what the face looks like. I am a face person.
So being into bodies is shallow but being into faces is not shallow.
It's more the attitude aspect. If a women takes care of her self, has the self determination to work out each week and takes pride in her appearance that is a sexy attitude IMO. thats the sort of person I would want to spend my time with.
If you're an active guy and love to work out 4-5 times a week it's unlikely you are going to be compatible with someone who would rather sit in all day and eat junk food on the coach. If that makes me shallow then so be it, IDGAF.
lol you sound like SUCH gentleman.0 -
I HATE HATE HATE!!!! that "curvy" means "fat." I have always been curvy, I will always be curvy. I have been as small as a size 3 and as large as a size 12 and was curvy all the way. It's called "I have hips and boobs"!!!!!
/rant
Anyway, as far as talking to a guy about your weight loss efforts, it's not pre-first-date conversation. Sorry. Once you know each other well and are moving to the next stage, sure. But not in a first contact message.
Amen. I hate that curvy has become a code word for fat. Hate to break it to you boys, but girls who have a naturally big chest are (9 times out of 10) going to have some hips. Those little girls you see with really big boobs? They are fake most of the time. That's nature.
we know what curvy means. when a guy uses the term, he means what you mean (big boobs, big hips, some extra weight). we also know what curvy means when most women use it to describe themselves (lots of extra weight). so the meaning depends on the context.0 -
It's code for "hot" just like when women say they want a man "with goals in life" or who is "successful" they really just mean a man with money.
I'm poor and ugly... therefore according to you... I not only don't "take care of my body", but I also have no "goals in life"?
Damn I'm screwed.0 -
Essentially yes, the OP question has already been answered, but somewhere along the way someone proposed the question, "Would you give someone a chance if you knew they were trying to change themselves?" To that I would say yes. I dated a girl who was about 200lbs. To a lot of people that would be unattractive, but I liked her. I even did what I could to invite her on active dates or to come to the gym with me. It wasn't until she talked about being happy with her weight and had no plans to lose any weight that I was a little uncomfortable.
TL;DR, to me, "A woman who takes care of her body." Is someone who has good hygiene and is always striving to look better and be healthier. You don't need to be a model, but if you have the mindset of being active and *trying* to look like a model... that's attractive. Curvy is still very very sexy in my book.0 -
Amen. I hate that curvy has become a code word for fat. Hate to break it to you boys, but girls who have a naturally big chest are (9 times out of 10) going to have some hips. Those little girls you see with really big boobs? They are fake most of the time. That's nature.
we know what curvy means. when a guy uses the term, he means what you mean (big boobs, big hips, some extra weight). we also know what curvy means when most women use it to describe themselves (lots of extra weight). so the meaning depends on the context.
Huh?
That's not at all what I meant. Not even a little bit.
When I say curvy, I mean a C or greater cup size with a proportional bottom. I do not mean "some extra weight." I mean, T&A. You can be very fit and still not be a 0 or a 2.
Somehow curvy has been co-opted into a euphemism for fat. That's what drives me nuts.0 -
we know what curvy means. when a guy uses the term, he means what you mean (big boobs, big hips, some extra weight). we also know what curvy means when most women use it to describe themselves (lots of extra weight). so the meaning depends on the context.
But I DON'T mean "some extra weight." I would be curvy if I weighed 90 pounds and had 5% body fat. My hip BONES are wide and my breasts are more mammary tissue than fat, so no matter how thin I get, they will be big.
So you don't know what I'm saying. :-)
Not to pick on you specifically. It's become the norm. It's very difficult to describe an hourglass figure without people thinking you're either very overweight (I have a friend who's 300 pounds who calls herself curvy) or have "a little extra weight."
When I weighed 102 pounds, I had curves. I had no extra weight.0 -
It's code for "hot" just like when women say they want a man "with goals in life" or who is "successful" they really just mean a man with money.
I'm poor and ugly... therefore according to you... I not only don't "take care of my body", but I also have no "goals in life"?
Damn I'm screwed.
I already asked this on page 3. Nobody seems to want to answer. Probably because women have just as "shallow" a standard as men do.0 -
I thought of this while I was reading. I once went on a date with a guy who was a personal trainer, and i work out like crazy. We started talking about nights out and I told him I liked chicken wings, beer and pizza. It totally set him off! "How do you put that into your body... blah blah blah" I said "You don't cheat, ever?" He said "I do, like once every 6 months." I said "Well, I do once a month and I don't regret it. I also love chocolate and sour candies, but I don't shove them in my mouth everyday."
Anyway.... to cut this story down. We did talk after the "date" and that was it. We both knew we weren't compatible because I wasn't "taking care of my body" enough for him.0
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