Children throwing tantrums in stores! What??

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Replies

  • Other people's children suck.

    There are two kinds of people watching a tantrum. The kind that think, Oh that poor child. The rest are thinking, Oh the poor parents.

    ^^This!! Thank you! :)
  • Nice
    Nice Posts: 84
    i remember taking my 3 and 4 year old boys to the olive garden once. They could handle a half hour out to eat without getting too annoyed with being strapped in a high chair..lol
    The problem was there was a 25 minute wait..we really wanted to go out to eat and decided to wait the time. the boys did really well for the first 10 minutes..but of course, they are young, hyper and curious. They started running and getting hyper and crying when we held them. they wanted to get down and explore.
    Finally it was our turn to be seated but by then the boys were pretty hyper and really tired of the situation. I put them in their high chairs and the yelling began. This is the most uncomfortable situation I can think of. Others coming to enjoy a meal and having to listen to our kids yell and trow crayons across the room. Plus the amount of stress it added to my husband and I trying to calm the boys and have a decent meal.
    We looked at each other and knew it wasn't going to happen. We got up and decided to leave. The waitress came by and we apologized and left. We knew there was no way this meal would be pleasant for anyone.
    Sometimes that's just what a parent has to do I guess..I mean how long do you expect a 3 and 4 year old to sit still while eating at a restaurant? It's too stressful of a situation and punishing the boys didn't feel right. Unfortunately at that age..they just don't want to sit still!! they want to run, explore, have fun..not sit in a highchair and behave. I'm not saying my boys are hyper and uncontrollable..it's just the certain situation was too long for them to deal with..the amount of time they were being asked to calm down or be held was just too long and their behavior understandably worsened.
  • OK people. I never suggested they beat a kid until they bled. I DID suggest they spank them though...not necessarily with a belt, but at the very least the palm of their hand. I probably should have clarified.

    And on a sidenote...the dad DID get the kid that toy, but this one was too far gone to stop the tantrum.
  • bushidowoman
    bushidowoman Posts: 1,599 Member
    Kids screaming in restaurants actually kind of bugs me, most people go out to eat to enjoy a nice meal without hearing screaming children, if you can't keep them under control don't go out or get a sitter.

    THIS!!!!! I do NOT want to hear YOUR screaming misbehaving child when I am out on a date with my husband. Don't you want to spend time alone with YOUR husband? Get a sitter! Have a date night. Dinner for two is cheaper than dinner for two plus kiddos. And they won't eat all their food anyway and it is wasteful. Please, PLEASE leave your kid with a sitter!

    I am fine with kids in restaurants if they are well behaved. But the minute a kid stands up in THEIR booth and leans over the back of the booth and into my personal space and the parent does nothing about it... oh. It's on. I sat in a restaurant a week ago and watched two little girls bounce in their booth and lean over the back into another diner's personal space. The other diner had to get up, ask the parents to please stop their children from leaning over and bouncing around the booth. And the parent did nothing. I felt so horrible for the diner :( and the parents comment? "Kids will be kids. If you don't like it, go somewhere else." (I'm an eavesdropper) Absolutely frustrating.

    Theres a few restaurants who've plainly said in a notice on their entrance door something along the lines of "customers with crying babies will be asked to leave". The restaurants have a huge list of "offended" people who try to tell them off but at the same time, they have lots of business because people know that you can eat peacefully there.

    Once again, I feel for the parents, I really do. However, you do NOT have a right to ruin my time just because your child decided to be disruptive...

    If there is not a notice on the door stating otherwise, my children have as much of a right to be there as anyone else does. I guarantee we will spend more money there than most of the other patrons will. And I cannot tell you how many times my meals have been ruined by loud, distasteful ADULTS. Have you ever tried asking someone to put away their cell phone or to tone down their language or to maybe find a different subject matter to discuss over dinner? It's just as annoying to dine with obnoxious adults as it is disruptive children. I have more tolerance for children, who are still learning. Adults *should know better*. When I find myself in that situation, I have two choices--deal with it or move on. I would say the same for people who are bothered by my children.

    Children do have a right to be there. They also have the right to act like humans instead of monkeys, stay in your booth, not be screaming and throwing food the entire time, etc. No one said children aren't welcome, but restaurants are restaurants, not playgrounds so if you bring your children to a restaurant they shouldn't be acting like it's a playground.

    I completely agree.

    I have never once told someone to quiet their child but I have given them the look. And as for the conversations are you only offended by them because you have small children around who might hear what they're saying? If that's the case then here's an idea: Don't take your small children to that restaurant any more! Find a place that's more child friendly like Friendly's or Chuck-E-Cheese. I'm sorry but I have never had a meal ruined by someone having a loud and "distasteful" conversation. Loud? Sure but when I go out with a group of people we tend to get loud as well and believe me I have had many conversations that I am positive some people would deem to be "distasteful" but never once has anyone come up to me and asked me to be quiet. And why is it your business to comment on the subject matter any way and who are you to ask someone to talk about a different subject matter?

    There's a huge difference between a child who is screaming, throwing food and banging their feet on the back of the booth or jumping around in the booth and leaning over my shoulder (yes, this has happened before!) and the parent just sits there and smiles and laughs. How is that respectful of ME and the time that I'm spending there? Why is it ok for your child to scream, throw food and stare at me over the seat of the booth and ruin my dinner and my time but it's not ok for people to talk loudly or *gasp* have "distasteful" conversations?

    This is my point. This whole "I-expect-others-to-conform-to-my-expectations-but-I'll-do-whatever-I-want" mentality. You are all concerned about others to being respectful of YOU. I and my children are expected to quietly tolerate loud cursing and hearing all about others' sexual exploits and details of all their dirty laundry and drama while I'm eating (I've had to sit through plenty of that with my kids). Sure you can talk as loudly as you want about whatever you want. But how dare I allow my children become restless or loud or *gasp* act like children in public? It's OK for me to be subjected to dirty looks and judgments and I should pack my children up and leave with them or keep them home to begin with? Um, nope. Sorry, but it's just not going to work that way. I'll discipline my children in my own way, regardless of what strangers think. If the manager does not ask us to leave (which has NEVER happened in my 19 years of taking wee ones to restaurants), we'll stay right where we are. And I will smile at your dirty looks. And if you complain to me, I will remark--with a smile!--"kids will be kids!" And if you loudly remark to your dinner companion about the behavior of my kids, I will just as loudly remark to my children that some adults haven't learned good manners yet, either. :smile:
    No, my children do not climb over booths or throw food or run in restaurants. But no, they do not always sit still and be quiet, either. I do not expect them to. I do not plan to keep us all sequestered until they are adults. And regardless of them being children, I cannot tell you how many times that my children have been more well-behaved than the adults around them.

    Here's another thought...if you don't want to deal with children while you are eating, go to one of those "adults only" restaurants.

    I'm done. Y'all have a lovely day now.
  • IamOnMywayNow
    IamOnMywayNow Posts: 470 Member
    Well when I was younger before I had kids I used to say that I would NEVER have a kid that screamed and threw tantrums in public........My 5 year old was a great baby and never did this Yay!! I am a perfect mother...........I now have a 2 year old that makes me eat those words almost every time we go to a store or restaurant. And when I am in the middle of shopping I refuse to leave because I dont have time to go back later so everyone gets to listen to my 2 year scream his little head off while I ignore him :)
  • laural007
    laural007 Posts: 251 Member
    You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.

    +1

    +2 And from the fact if he had spanked his son in the parking lot and someone with a camera phone had filmed it...he would be in jail and labled worst dad ever by the media.

    + Whatever number we're on. Then CPS would have been called and his life would have been turned inside out. The problem isn't a lack of discipline in many instances. It's a fear of what hell others can unleash on you.



    Been there, done that with my kid. Did the spanking thing, got reported for child abuse. Yep. That's why you see more and more kids throwing tantrums and acting like idiotic little brats out in public, and parents doing nothing about it. The social system has our hands tied literally. I have been through hell and back as a single mom trying to raise a boy. And let me tell you, as irritating and annoying as it is for the onlookers, it is 10x more embarrassing for the parent when your child acts like that. I refuse to stop what I am doing to cater to him though, he has to learn to behave and I have to do the shopping when I'm there to do it. I don't have the time to leave and come back later. I remember one time I went to walmart with my mom, and she went one way and I went the other. My son decided to throw a tantrum because he wanted out of the cart, and my mom told me later she heard him all the way across the store. Yea, those moments - don't miss them. I wanted to just die on the spot. But I couldn't do anything other than finish my shopping. Of course I sternly told him to stop it, etc etc etc. But like the dad you saw, that's about it. I had to finish my shopping, and I had to keep control of him. But I couldn't spank him, or put him in time out, or anything. Like others said, you can't leave the store or go to a bathroom to discipline them because you never know what busybody with a camera phone is going to record and turn you in. And by the time you get home, the kid forgot all about the incident, so there's not a lot you can do. Of course I talked to him when things were calm, explained how we are supposed to behave, etc. But when push comes to shove and a kid decides they aren't happy about something, their first reaction is a meltdown. Doesn't matter where you are. They don't have the emotional maturity yet to handle their anger and frustration calmer.

    Not all kids are the same either. Some kids will be hellions, some are very good little angels. Some kids respond well to "soft" discipline like time out and it works wonderfully, but others just will not respond to anything other than a good old fashioned spanking. There is no "magic formula" perfect right way to do it.

    Despite what I have been through with CPS, I am still an advocate of corporal discipline when needed. No, I do not think any child should be beat for every little transgression. But when you've exhausted all other means, sometimes they just need a wake up call. I would much rather wrangle my child's bratty attitude today, than deal with a juvenile delinquent who has no respect of me in a few years.

    Mine went through it for several years. He is now 11 and very well behaved in public. He's a sweetheart, has manners, and is very thoughtful and considerate of others. You'd never believe he was that screaming bratty toddler a few years ago. Of course now the preteen attitude is starting to kick in...but, I feel like I've laid my foundation with him - he knows the boundaries, he knows what is and isn't acceptable. He knows I mean what I say, and there will be consequences if he doesn't follow the rules.

    Anyway, give parents a break. If you see one dealing with a screaming toddler, maybe offer to help them. Don't judge them, and don't add to their stress by "reporting" them or giving them dirty judging looks. Be glad they care enough to expect their child to behave in public. And if none of that appeals to you, you can always leave the store.

    Well said. You can do the very best you can raising your child and no matter what they are still going to throw a tantrum, they are children for goodness sake. It sucks for everyone, there is no easy solution. My 6 year old son never has nor never did throw tantrums in stores, however my 4 year old daughter does. I parent them both the same but no two kids are alike so we cant be so quick to judge any parent on how they are raising their children.
  • downinaggieland98
    downinaggieland98 Posts: 224 Member
    You obviously don't have kids. I am sure when you do you will be an amazing mother and your kids will never throw tantrums though.

    Love it.
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
    OK people. I never suggested they beat a kid until they bled. I DID suggest they spank them though...not necessarily with a belt, but at the very least the palm of their hand. I probably should have not posted at all.

    There you go
  • MinMin97
    MinMin97 Posts: 2,674 Member
    I was in Michaels yesterday and this father and son were shopping. I guess his kid (who looked around 3 or 4) wanted something, but dad wouldn't get it for him. This kid started pitching a fit in the store, crying...screaming (the usual tantrum). We got to listen to that for 45 minutes. We also had the joy of being in front of this kid and his dad in line to check out (more high pitched screaming and crying). The dad is trying to console this kid...but it doesn't stop him. When they got outside, the kid lays down on the sidewalk and basically starts thrashing and screaming and crying. Meanwhile, the dad is PLEADING with his 4 yr old to stop. WTH?? Why is a grown man trying to conjole this spoiled little brat? WHY do parents do this?

    To any of you older people, what would your parents have done? I have one very distinct memory of pitching a fit for some doll. My parents took me out to the car and I got spanked there. Once we got home, I got the leather belt. I remember this spanking the most b/c the welp marks bled.... I'm so tired of this lack of discipline in kids. I have come across some of the rudest little twerps EVER, and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one.

    rant over.
    Where do I begin?
    You'll never know what it is like to be a parent....until you ARE one. You will have a lot more respect for parents then.
    It's hard work, and you will never meet perfect parents, nor any perfect children. So have respect.
    Discipline is definitely needed at some point in a child's life, in the form of a spanking.
    However, it is not to be done in anger, and it hurts! but does not produce blood!
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
    OK people. I never suggested they beat a kid until they bled. I DID suggest they spank them though...not necessarily with a belt, but at the very least the palm of their hand. I probably should have not posted at all.

    There you go

    You are quickly becoming my favorite troll!
  • Snikkee
    Snikkee Posts: 295 Member
    I was in Michaels yesterday and this father and son were shopping. I guess his kid (who looked around 3 or 4) wanted something, but dad wouldn't get it for him. This kid started pitching a fit in the store, crying...screaming (the usual tantrum). We got to listen to that for 45 minutes. We also had the joy of being in front of this kid and his dad in line to check out (more high pitched screaming and crying). The dad is trying to console this kid...but it doesn't stop him. When they got outside, the kid lays down on the sidewalk and basically starts thrashing and screaming and crying. Meanwhile, the dad is PLEADING with his 4 yr old to stop. WTH?? Why is a grown man trying to conjole this spoiled little brat? WHY do parents do this?

    To any of you older people, what would your parents have done? I have one very distinct memory of pitching a fit for some doll. My parents took me out to the car and I got spanked there. Once we got home, I got the leather belt. I remember this spanking the most b/c the welp marks bled.... I'm so tired of this lack of discipline in kids. I have come across some of the rudest little twerps EVER, and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one.

    rant over.


    Yeah I would NEVER take a belt to my child. how horrible. Kids throw fits, kids throw long, screaming fits, it does not matter if they are well disciplined or not, a child is a child and they throw fits!!! The poor man was probably embarrassed and wanted to finish what he needed to do, and just wanted his kid to stop. How dare you place judgement on him. It is people like you that give parents dirty looks in stores and judge them because their child is throwing a fit. Who's child has not thrown a fit in the store before? Mine certainly has, and it is none of your business or concern how other people discipline their children. Hitting them with a hand or a belt is never an option.
    But go ahead and keep promoting child abuse.
  • Doodlewhopper
    Doodlewhopper Posts: 1,018 Member
    The new parent has un-tested abilities & no previous experience. There will be mistakes; but generally these mistakes will clean up in the wash for sincere parents. I take my responsibility as a parent serious. My job is to build a solid base of sound principles - respect, love, empathy, grace, ethics, etc. As a parent I have made many mistakes; but they are results of honest effort; and I have learned from them.

    Lesson learned: Spanking is appropriate because a young child has yet to subscribe to logic. As the child develops then other means of discipline can be effective, but spanking should remain an option.

    My sons were held accountable. They were spanked. They were also kissed daily and we exchanged "I love yous" until one day (around 15 years old) it became awkward for them, so we backed off. Now we no longer need to state the obvious. They are respectful, considerate, responsible... and a fact I am proud of - each have custody of their daughters (since they were toddlers)

    Now, you people who are too "educated" to spank and discipline your children deserve all the future trouble you get. I am totally disgusted with your lib attitude. Most of you are lazy and poor parents who should never have had children.

    I cant begin to tell you how much I enjoy sitting in a restaurant, 5 feet away from your spawn of satan brat - screaming. It's not the kid, it's you who I loathe. You have no regard or consideration for others & this is the lesson that you are teaching your spawn. You are irresponsible & inept.
  • ethieman
    ethieman Posts: 99 Member
    A) YOU have no idea what this parent is going through with this child. The child could have autism or sensory issues or name some other problem. How do you know for sure that was his father? Could have been a male relative giving a parent a break.

    B) It's confusing to me that we Americans can hit/beat children all we want, but if you hit/beat someone over the age of 18, it is considered illegal and you can be tried in a court of law.

    We continue to feel that corporal punishment is necessary, and many posters on here feel that parents not hitting their kids is why society has gone to ****. There is a reason the US has the highest school violence rates in the WORLD...when adults respond to misbehavior with anger, that teaches children that anger and physically lashing out is the appropriate response to things that upset/frustrate them.

    C) I'm formerly a high school teacher, now teaching students how to be teachers. If teachers can handle a room full of kids without ever touching them, why can't a parent deal with a handful or less without touching them? I took 42 kids on a 4 day trip with one other chaperone and had NO problems (they were not all shining examples of students either, many had behavior problems with other teachers). There are MANY cultures that do not ever hit their children (Japanese and Indian are two that I'm familiar with), and it's interesting to me that they do not have the violence issues that the U.S.A. does.

    D) Hitting a kid is not the only way to make them respectful and successful adults. Corporal punishment was not promoted in my family at all. We had consequences that varied according to the misbehavior, which I'm sure were MUCH more difficult for my parents to monitor than simply hitting us would have been. We all turned out ok by most people's standards...in my family of 4 children: the youngest is playing college football, my younger sister has an office in the capitol building in Washington, D.C., I will begin a new job as a professor at a major university this summer after completion of my Ph.D., and my older sister does PR and marketing for a large union in Washington, D.C.
  • Pedal_Pusher
    Pedal_Pusher Posts: 1,166 Member
    I don't believe in hitting. ever. for any reason. period. Violence is violence.
  • Doodlewhopper
    Doodlewhopper Posts: 1,018 Member
    Ever notice that those who do not have children have all the answers? LOL
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    She's 18. So much more than what?

    Age has nothing to do with potential. Unless achieving 18 was the goal?

    Had you reached your full potential at 18? She just finished high school and started college. She's a confident, beautiful, healthy, happy, not-afraid-of-anything young woman. She's smart. She's sweet. She's full of empathy and love and compassion. She's a good person who people adore. She has a sense of humor. She's a wonderful, amazing human being.

    She doesn't drink, she has no interest in drugs. She doesn't smoke. Not because she was ever threatened with punishment for those things (I have even allowed her to drink in my home over the years) but because she chooses not to. She isn't susceptible to negative peer pressure.

    But what she will achieve for the rest of her life is still a mystery. At 18, you just don't know yet what most people are going to achieve,

    Clearly, a few spankings in her youth did not negatively affect her.
    If your children have half the childhood she (or I!) had, they will be very lucky children.

    I'm going for even better.

    You can't make that statement. You don't know what our childhoods were like. It would be quite difficult to make your children's better.
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    Ever notice that those who do not have children have all the answers? LOL

    Ever noticed that those who do have children have all the excuses? LOL
  • Ever notice that those who do not have children have all the answers? LOL

    My thoughts exactly.
  • ngressman
    ngressman Posts: 229 Member
    WOW, a lot of you people are pretty harsh and nasty about this. I agree that parents letting kids get away with throwing tantrums in public (really at home too) is ridiculous. But all of you people telling the OP to not have kids, or that she'll be "an amazing mother" and being sarcastic, smart a$$es about it is just as bad. This is coming from a single dad of an 8 year old son. There have been a few times where he tried to throw tantrums but it was squashed right then and there. I can probably count on one hand the number of tantrums he's thrown in his entire life. Never spanked or hit him, just never acknowledged the tantrum and it stopped after he got bored with it then I walked to him about it and took things away from him. And guess what? He's not some wierd kid that was negatively impacted because I stopped him from throwing tantrums or acting out.

    Your kid can want to throw tantrums all they want but if you let it go on or give it any kind of attention then they will continue to happen. All of the people that say "kids will just do that" and are satisfied with that are part of the issue with this country and world. They are happy letting things go on no matter if it's right, bothers anyone else, or teaches the kid anything worthwile. They let it happen because it is easy for them. By letting the kids get away with it tells them that it is ok to do.

    It's just like a kid touching a stove. If they touch it a hundred times and it's cold, then they think it's ok and will continue to do it. If it's hot one time, they learn never to do it again.

    People need to be parents and quit saying "that's what they do." I'm 28 and never had my parents spank or belt me or anything like that. Anytime my brother, sister, or I got out of line we heard about it. Guess what?? That stuff stopped pretty quick.

    OP, i completely agree with you that it is nuts the dad let the kid's tantrum continue like it did. People need to be parents and quit trying to be their kids' best friend. My parents worked more on being parents than my friend, and I respect them more for that and they are some of my best friends for it.
    I think the reason most people are telling her to not have kids is the fact that she seems to think that spanking a child with a belt until he/she bleeds is an acceptable form of punishment. At least that's the problem I have with it.
  • There is a HUGE difference between spanking and beating. Previous generations (think grandparents, great grandparents) got spankings. In my experience, they are a very respectful generation.
  • MinMin97
    MinMin97 Posts: 2,674 Member
    Ever notice that those who do not have children have all the answers? LOL

    Ever noticed that those who do have children have all the excuses? LOL
    What do you mean, Taunto?:smile:
  • moosegt35
    moosegt35 Posts: 1,296 Member
    ROFL. Scary to be a 4 year old? Wow. Just wow. Yea, its the roughest part of your life, you have to eat, try not to sh1t and piss your pants and not act like a demon constantly. How many bills and resposibilities does a 4 year old have? You people are pathetic. And who said anything about hitting with objects? One little lick with an open hand on the *kitten* and a strong voice always worked on me.

    #1: Who said anything about hitting with objects? The OP who said she was beaten with a belt until she bled. The very genesis of this thread was hitting with objects.

    #2: Not scary to be a 4 year old? You think bills and responsibilities are scary? You're a coward. To a 4 year old, the monsters in the closet ARE REAL. There are REALLY MONSTERS THAT WILL EAT YOU, while you sleep. Steal your genitals while you sit on a toilet. They don't understand reality yet because they are only four. And you think they're *kitten*, good for you. Further, they have no control over anything. They have no money, no job, no choice in ANYTHING. They are completely dependent on their parents . . . which, for some kids, are probably a bit worse than others.

    Yes, the OP did say her parents hit her with a belt till she bled, that isn't the correct thing to do. That also isn't a spanking, that is a beating. Spankings are perfectly fine and I don't think she suggested beating the child until it bled.

    Bills and responsibilities don't scare me one bit, they can be stressful at times though. I am 26 and have owned my own home since 22, paid for my college and have 0 debt other than my car and home. So I wouldn't say I am a coward. If a 4 year old believes all of that then they should be put in a special school to find out what is wrong with them and who taught them that crap. Are these closet monsters at the store and restaurants causing them to act like mutants? More excuses for the kids to act out, good going.
  • ImprovingEla
    ImprovingEla Posts: 396 Member
    Ever notice that those who do not have children have all the answers? LOL

    Ever noticed that those who do have children have all the excuses? LOL
    What do you mean, Taunto?:smile:

    All those with no kids seem thinks, that this is a normal child, all those with children seem to think that this kid in the first post, suffers from autism or another disease!!
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    Ever notice that those who do not have children have all the answers? LOL

    Ever noticed that those who do have children have all the excuses? LOL

    Ever noticed that those who are ambiguous make the best comments? LOL!
  • Pedal_Pusher
    Pedal_Pusher Posts: 1,166 Member
    "and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one. " <~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I'm happy you don't have any either. Hitting kids is wrong. period.
  • Doodlewhopper
    Doodlewhopper Posts: 1,018 Member
    A) YOU have no idea what this parent is going through with this child. The child could have autism or sensory issues or name some other problem. How do you know for sure that was his father? Could have been a male relative giving a parent a break.

    B) It's confusing to me that we Americans can hit/beat children all we want, but if you hit/beat someone over the age of 18, it is considered illegal and you can be tried in a court of law.

    We continue to feel that corporal punishment is necessary, and many posters on here feel that parents not hitting their kids is why society has gone to ****. There is a reason the US has the highest school violence rates in the WORLD...when adults respond to misbehavior with anger, that teaches children that anger and physically lashing out is the appropriate response to things that upset/frustrate them.

    C) I'm formerly a high school teacher, now teaching students how to be teachers. If teachers can handle a room full of kids without ever touching them, why can't a parent deal with a handful or less without touching them? I took 42 kids on a 4 day trip with one other chaperone and had NO problems (they were not all shining examples of students either, many had behavior problems with other teachers). There are MANY cultures that do not ever hit their children (Japanese and Indian are two that I'm familiar with), and it's interesting to me that they do not have the violence issues that the U.S.A. does.

    D) Hitting a kid is not the only way to make them respectful and successful adults. Corporal punishment was not promoted in my family at all. We had consequences that varied according to the misbehavior, which I'm sure were MUCH more difficult for my parents to monitor than simply hitting us would have been. We all turned out ok by most people's standards...in my family of 4 children: the youngest is playing college football, my younger sister has an office in the capitol building in Washington, D.C., I will begin a new job as a professor at a major university this summer after completion of my Ph.D., and my older sister does PR and marketing for a large union in Washington, D.C.

    You are misinformed and have stated many inaccuracies and untruths.

    Here are some facts for you as reported by a U.K. News Source
    "UK is violent crime capital of Europe"

    <<<The total number of violent offences recorded compared to population is higher than any other country in Europe, as well as America, Canada, Australia and South Africa.>>>

    <<<The UK had a greater number of murders in 2007 than any other EU country – 927 – and at a relative rate higher than most western European neighbours, including France, Germany, Italy and Spain. >>>

    <<<Overall, 5.4 million crimes were recorded in the UK in 2007 - more than 10 a minute - second only to Sweden>>>

    <<< It means there are over 2,000 crimes recorded per 100,000 population in the UK, making it the most violent place in Europe.

    Austria is second, with a rate of 1,677 per 100,000 people, followed by Sweden, Belgium, Finland and Holland.

    By comparison, America has an estimated rate of 466 violent crimes per 100,000 population. >>>

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/law-and-order/5712573/UK-is-violent-crime-capital-of-Europe.html
  • kelsully
    kelsully Posts: 1,008 Member
    I was in Michaels yesterday and this father and son were shopping. I guess his kid (who looked around 3 or 4) wanted something, but dad wouldn't get it for him. This kid started pitching a fit in the store, crying...screaming (the usual tantrum). We got to listen to that for 45 minutes. We also had the joy of being in front of this kid and his dad in line to check out (more high pitched screaming and crying). The dad is trying to console this kid...but it doesn't stop him. When they got outside, the kid lays down on the sidewalk and basically starts thrashing and screaming and crying. Meanwhile, the dad is PLEADING with his 4 yr old to stop. WTH?? Why is a grown man trying to conjole this spoiled little brat? WHY do parents do this?

    To any of you older people, what would your parents have done? I have one very distinct memory of pitching a fit for some doll. My parents took me out to the car and I got spanked there. Once we got home, I got the leather belt. I remember this spanking the most b/c the welp marks bled.... I'm so tired of this lack of discipline in kids. I have come across some of the rudest little twerps EVER, and am so happy I don't have any of my own. I know for a fact my temper would get the best of me if I had one.

    rant over.


    Rant beginning
    You do not have any idea the history of that child/parent thus do not have any idea if the child is actually a spoiled rotten brat or not.
    Did dad buy him what he wanted?
    Did dad give in to the child's demands?

    Perhaps child has autism and this is a fit that the child does not want to be experiencing any more than the parent and the pleading comes from the family pain in wishing this poor child did not have to deal with this.

    Maybe the kid was a brat and the dad was horrible but without knowing any more about the kid and dad than what you think you observed you were mildly inconvenienced for a short time in your life. Get over it.
  • FrenchMob
    FrenchMob Posts: 1,167 Member

    We continue to feel that corporal punishment is necessary, and many posters on here feel that parents not hitting their kids is why society has gone to ****. There is a reason the US has the highest school violence rates in the WORLD...when adults respond to misbehavior with anger, that teaches children that anger and physically lashing out is the appropriate response to things that upset/frustrate them.

    Seriously? You're playing the Connecticut card for corporal punishment? If that's not reaching I don't know what is.

    I don't care what anyone says, spanking is a VERY effective method. Same as guns, spanking has been around for a very long time, and school violence only started getting bad in the last 10 years, so give it a rest. If anything, I blame the pussification of parents/society/government for the uncontrolled behavior of kids these days. In general, North America has become pussified.
  • moosegt35
    moosegt35 Posts: 1,296 Member
    OK people. I never suggested they beat a kid until they bled. I DID suggest they spank them though...not necessarily with a belt, but at the very least the palm of their hand. I probably should have not posted at all.

    There you go

    are you a whiney *kitten* in every thread?
  • AngryDiet
    AngryDiet Posts: 1,349 Member
    You can't make that statement. You don't know what our childhoods were like. It would be quite difficult to make your children's better.

    Sure I can. You encouraged it by attempting to turn this into a contest of who's child turns out better.

    If my children have a childhood as good as yours or hers, minus the hitting, I'll be satisfied that it is better. So there's that.

    After arguing that if there were no bruises or cuts it must be OK, there isn't really much left for you to say. Unless you feel you can go lower?