This site should not be about weight loss bullies !
Replies
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Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are, mostly?
*kitten*. *kitten* covered *kitten* with *kitten* filling.
Dr. Cox hit the nail right on the head. And add to that nastiness the anonymity that is the internet, and I'm shocked that you're shocked that there are negative people on a positive site.
There are several people who are already fit, or only had a few pounds to lose - part of the "look at me, I'm so cool and sexy" crowd, they acted like that to begin with.
The solution?
Start kicking them in the shin.
this seriously made me LOL... :drinker:
Me too. He wins the humor award for today! Hey--that's an idea! Why don't we get to vote on the most humorous post of the day? One of the criteria could be that it NOT contain mean-spirited putdowns. Mods take note, please!0 -
I actually did . I love the people who get my point that we are all equal. We are all here for the same reason and im looking for positive people to help me on my journey. For the others who have found another reason to try their hardest to disagree with someoneo all I can say is REALLY? This was supposed to be positive and some people still don't get that.
But the title of your thread is negative in and of itself. "This site should NOT be about weight loss bullies" - not is negative. You started it off with a negative statement. Grammatically speaking, not even literal or subjective interpretation, it is negative. Ohhhh the irony.
And HCG is bad. Very bad.
REALLY?
Umm, yes.0 -
But maybe the 'quick fix' is part of a plan that addresses their weight gain in the first place?What I wonder, how many people who have done 'quick fixes' actually keep the weight loss off?
Since the quick fix never addresses what made them gain weight in the first place.
Isn't that why they are always re-doing the quick fix, or looking for the next newest better one?
As for people that have lost lots of weight knowing what they're talking about:
All too often on here it seems that people that have succeeded presume their way is THE best way.
For instance, I've often been seen chanting 'Calories in, Calories out', while others don't always find that methodology works for them*.
*Of course, I'd point out that I hold this view partly because it's based on the rather fundamentals rules of the universe, as we understand them :P.0 -
I'd like to say, in a very positive way, that we have become a people obsessed with whining and finger pointing.
Bullying hasn't increased, it's been defined down to the point that each and every whining little snowflake can claim to be bullied at the first sign of honest, frank disagreement, and thousands of other snowflakes will whine in agreement about how nasty all the bullies are.
Drive the disagreement out. Drive the humor out. Drive the life out.
Pathetic.
Disgustingly, pathetic.0 -
By the way, two people have just advocated violence on the thread. None of the people disagreeing with your "diet" OP, or who are "snarky," have done this.
Am I going to report them?
No... because I can tell they're joking.
First I never advocated a diet , I make my own choices because I'm an adult! I was simply giving an example of one of the topics that is used to bully people on this site . Yes I used the word again because that's exactly what I mean so thank you to everyone giving the grammar school lessons. Second you are all adults and I do not condone violence so please don't act like i have anything to do with or control of what comes out of others mouths. Third who said I reported anyone? I just chose to go on with my life and find positive people. I suggest you do the same.
What a shame that you have clearly misunderstood not only the message you've put out with your post, but the responses you have received.
I'm only hoping others read the thread and come away with a much clearer understanding of what "bullying," "support," and perhaps more importantly, "health," actually mean.
Candor and rationality are in short supply because people would rather have pats on the head, and shallow agreement. Once their mind is made up, all that matters is approval...not honesty.0 -
I started on this site over a year ago and found that it was hard to stay on here, while I was looking for support I actually found a lot of negativity. I was orginally on the hcg diet and actually found a lot of success on it and don't regret it at all. What i did regret was sharing it with the people on this site. I got hateful post on my threads , emails, ect.. I was shocked. It's very rare that you find that a place were you can be honest about your weight and your struggles and find like minded people who share the same experience. So after taking a break I've decided to try again because charting my food and seeing my weight loss post each day was motivational. I also really loved the support I gave and recieved from the positive people on this site. So if your looking for a positive person to help you be motivated then add me and hopefully we can help each other.
oh that's just yuck! sorry to hear that.0 -
Oh and lastly... I often have people shoot down my opinions.
I'm not insulted because generally I've well researched the topic before I talk about it.
If I haven't, I will do so and may change my mind if the other person is right.
If I think they're wrong, I will explain why I believe they're wrong backing it up with my research.
If they were doing it to 'bully' they'll look silly not me - and I'll continue to feel happy with my choices as I am confident in my reasons for making them.0 -
That's a great point. And once BOTH parties' minds are made up.... well then, all bets are off it seems. Everyone is sure they are right.
Candor and rationality are in short supply because people would rather have pats on the head, and shallow agreement. Once their mind is made up, all that matters is approval...not honesty.
Perhaps a little perspective on BOTH sides would be good.0 -
Other people who don't comment read these threads. Being supportive and saying "great idea!" to someone asking about a dangerous diet is the same as telling the anonymous people that they should try it too. Disagreeing with someone is not bullying. I'm not going to tell someone asking if they should try crystal meth to lose weight that it's a great idea. It's not. It's extremely dangerous. As is HCG. Telling that person that it's a very bad idea is not bullying. It's helping them.0
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When it's all said and done I'm here to be surrounded with positive people who are here to support each other. Again I am not advocating any diet it was an example and I wont be apologizing to anyone for trying something once. Do I do things differently now yes cause I've learned. But the fact that that's all some of you focused on and not my message about being positive and helping each other is sad. However for those of you who truly took the time to read what I said and see that it was nothing more then me expressing my feelings about an experience I had (which I can do just like you all) , thank you. You have all been on forums and seen people made fun of , mean comments , and a group attacking someone's choice. I just don't like that and if that means I'm unrealistic that a bunch of over weight people can join together to support each other in a positive way then I guess I am. There are people everyday who feel that because their smaller they should tell me how to lose weight , on this site i experience rudness, mean comments, nasty emails with very vulgar language and things I wont even mention. I dont want that. the true spirit of this site is to encourage each other and that's what I'm here to do. Some people may not like the way I "stated " things or the words that I used but I wont apologize just like I wouldn't ask you to. Thank you for all of your post, concerns, lessons, and witty comments. I have learned that surrounding yourself with positive people is about picking those who are worth your time and throwing back the rest. People need different things to prosper and I'll just find people who fit my needs.
Have a great day guys ! God Bless!
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Oh my god. I pour my heart out to you people and NOTHING! Are you all dead inside? Dead like Timmy is, now? That's right. He died. He was like 17, which is pretty good for a dog, but still. Your hearts are THREE sizes too small. THREE!0
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I've found a lot of positive people on here. When I didn't log in die a while they all store me saying te missed me and what they could do to help. Thank you everybody.0
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But maybe the 'quick fix' is part of a plan that addresses their weight gain in the first place?What I wonder, how many people who have done 'quick fixes' actually keep the weight loss off?
Since the quick fix never addresses what made them gain weight in the first place.
Isn't that why they are always re-doing the quick fix, or looking for the next newest better one?
As for people that have lost lots of weight knowing what they're talking about:
All too often on here it seems that people that have succeeded presume their way is THE best way.
For instance, I've often been seen chanting 'Calories in, Calories out', while others don't always find that methodology works for them*.
*Of course, I'd point out that I hold this view partly because it's based on the rather fundamentals rules of the universe, as we understand them :P.
So, what's a quick fix that addresses their weight gain in the first place?
I'm listening.
I'm interested.0 -
Oh my god. I pour my heart out to you people and NOTHING! Are you all dead inside? Dead like Timmy is, now? That's right. He died. He was like 17, which is pretty good for a dog, but still. Your hearts are THREE sizes too small. THREE!
Actually mine is 5 times too small.
And I laughed at your post.0 -
I had a cat named Timmy when I was little. He was awesome.Oh my god. I pour my heart out to you people and NOTHING! Are you all dead inside? Dead like Timmy is, now? That's right. He died. He was like 17, which is pretty good for a dog, but still. Your hearts are THREE sizes too small. THREE!
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TIMMY!!!! *raises fist in the air* WHY????0
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When it's all said and done I'm here to be surrounded with positive people who are here to support each other. Again I am not advocating any diet it was an example and I wont be apologizing to anyone for trying something once. Do I do things differently now yes cause I've learned. But the fact that that's all some of you focused on and not my message about being positive and helping each other is sad. However for those of you who truly took the time to read what I said and see that it was nothing more then me expressing my feelings about an experience I had (which I can do just like you all) , thank you. You have all been on forums and seen people made fun of , mean comments , and a group attacking someone's choice. I just don't like that and if that means I'm unrealistic that a bunch of over weight people can join together to support each other in a positive way then I guess I am. There are people everyday who feel that because their smaller they should tell me how to lose weight , on this site i experience rudness, mean comments, nasty emails with very vulgar language and things I wont even mention. I dont want that. the true spirit of this site is to encourage each other and that's what I'm here to do. Some people may not like the way I "stated " things or the words that I used but I wont apologize just like I wouldn't ask you to. Thank you for all of your post, concerns, lessons, and witty comments. I have learned that surrounding yourself with positive people is about picking those who are worth your time and throwing back the rest. People need different things to prosper and I'll just find people who fit my needs.
Have a great day guys ! God Bless!
Translation = You win, I lose. I'm taking my toys and going home now. Somebody, call my unicorn STAT....where are my rosy shades? That sun is shining so brightly I can barely see for all the shiny, reflective, happy people nearby. *prances off on the path of positivity*0 -
I'd like to say, in a very positive way, that we have become a people obsessed with whining and finger pointing.
Bullying hasn't increased, it's been defined down to the point that each and every whining little snowflake can claim to be bullied at the first sign of honest, frank disagreement, and thousands of other snowflakes will whine in agreement about how nasty all the bullies are.
Drive the disagreement out. Drive the humor out. Drive the life out.
Pathetic.
Disgustingly, pathetic.
HERE HERE ! RAWR !0 -
*curls up in fetal position, sobbing*0
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TIMMY!!!! *raises fist in the air* WHY????
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*curls up in fetal position, sobbing*
gosh, you are so negative. Stop your crying.0 -
Oh my god. I pour my heart out to you people and NOTHING! Are you all dead inside? Dead like Timmy is, now? That's right. He died. He was like 17, which is pretty good for a dog, but still. Your hearts are THREE sizes too small. THREE!
you are pretty funny0 -
ITA. Seriously. I cannot imagine some of these people acting this way offline. It is bullying behavior pure & simple. Just one small example: a newbie asked a question about calf exercises, and someone posted sarcastically that calves were in the meadow. Of course several regulars had to say how clever that was (it was????). I'm sure the newbie made the unforgiveaqble mistake of using the word "toning" thus opening him or her up to obscene ridicule by the forum regs who claim they are sick to death of answering the same questions although no one's forcing them to do it. They just need to step on someone to feel good about themselves. There are worst example of bullying here, but that one stuck in my mind as it was very similar to a sarcastic response my middle schooler had heard the week before. At middle school.
Oh and then there are the constant posts about women just being jealous of each other. Sexism is alive and well here. Racism would never be tolerated (and it should never be!), but it's OK to rip women apart.
That's not bullying. It's called a joke. It wasn't at the person's expense, it was wordplay.
All you people who mistake humor, or even sarcasm, with the "use of force and coercion to bully and intimidate others" must live in a very pleasant world. Really. When I was getting chairs pulled out from under me, cornered in hallways and berated for sticking my neck out for quieter kids, and consistently called "ugly," "horseface" and given carrots when I walked in a room, I could have gone for a joke that wasn't about *me*, but was about a funny coincidence of words. Goddamn Shakespeare used wordplay similar to the one you commented on; and that's really considered bullying by you?
And the people who "rip" apart women are generally not the same people making the clever wordplay.
Who are these "they" and "them"? It seems like anyone that disagrees with someone, or makes a joke they don't get, or just grinds their gears, becomes part of this inexplicable other of "bullies."
That's. Not. Bullying.
This thread comes up all the time, yes. Does that mean there's a problem? Maybe, but not of "bullying."
And we have a winner !0 -
Oh my god. I pour my heart out to you people and NOTHING! Are you all dead inside? Dead like Timmy is, now? That's right. He died. He was like 17, which is pretty good for a dog, but still. Your hearts are THREE sizes too small. THREE!
I read it.. I just didn't know what to say to sitting in doggie poop. like. ew.
Your story touched my heart... this one time, I stepped in dog poo, and I had to wash it off with a hose..
Not nearly as traumatic as your story, granted, but... wait what was the question?0 -
Oh my god. I pour my heart out to you people and NOTHING! Are you all dead inside? Dead like Timmy is, now? That's right. He died. He was like 17, which is pretty good for a dog, but still. Your hearts are THREE sizes too small. THREE!
I read it.. I just didn't know what to say to sitting in doggie poop. like. ew.
Your story touched my heart... this one time, I stepped in dog poo, and I had to wash it off with a hose..
Not nearly as traumatic as your story, granted, but... wait what was the question?
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :drinker: :flowerforyou:0 -
When it's all said and done I'm here to be surrounded with positive people who are here to support each other. Again I am not advocating any diet it was an example and I wont be apologizing to anyone for trying something once. Do I do things differently now yes cause I've learned. But the fact that that's all some of you focused on and not my message about being positive and helping each other is sad. However for those of you who truly took the time to read what I said and see that it was nothing more then me expressing my feelings about an experience I had (which I can do just like you all) , thank you. You have all been on forums and seen people made fun of , mean comments , and a group attacking someone's choice. I just don't like that and if that means I'm unrealistic that a bunch of over weight people can join together to support each other in a positive way then I guess I am. There are people everyday who feel that because their smaller they should tell me how to lose weight , on this site i experience rudness, mean comments, nasty emails with very vulgar language and things I wont even mention. I dont want that. the true spirit of this site is to encourage each other and that's what I'm here to do. Some people may not like the way I "stated " things or the words that I used but I wont apologize just like I wouldn't ask you to. Thank you for all of your post, concerns, lessons, and witty comments. I have learned that surrounding yourself with positive people is about picking those who are worth your time and throwing back the rest. People need different things to prosper and I'll just find people who fit my needs.
Have a great day guys ! God Bless!
Translation = You win, I lose. I'm taking my toys and going home now. Somebody, call my unicorn STAT....where are my rosy shades? That sun is shining so brightly I can barely see for all the shiny, reflective, happy people nearby. *prances off on the path of positivity*
Okay, I'm curious: Does anyone consider the above reply to be unnecessary and snarky in the context in which it was posted, or is this one the "helpful but misunderstood" posts that everyone's talking about? Maybe it's an example of "tough love"? Or is it "good humor"?0 -
Another one of those "people here are mean" threads. If you are so deeply affected by faceless people on a weight-loss forum then maybe you should steer clear of it. People arent going to change, this is the internet. Just like there are *kitten* in real life, they come online too.0
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When I was 5 years old I sat on a bee and it stung my butt. Although it's not the same thing as sitting in dog poo, I can relate.Okay. I can tell that people are getting worked up here, so I think everyone needs to hear the story of Timmy and Me.
When I was growing up, our next door neighbours had a daschund named Timmy. His lady owner was very nice, but his man owner once shouted at me, because the Big Wheel I was riding up and down and up and down and up and down (etc forever) the street was too loud. He was relatively ****ish.
Timmy and I were wonderful friends. Whenever he went for a walk (off his leash, because this was in the olden days when seat belts were optional and shirt collars were as big as your face), he would overshoot his driveway to come and see me, and kiss me and let me hug his neck. I was not tall.
One day, my family and I were going to visit my grandparents, or some other old people who only ever had crappy candy in their house, and since I was ready before everyone else, I went outside to impatiently wait. Timmy was on his front lawn. We ran towards each other, slow-motion-on-a-beach style, to hug, and I sat down on the grass to hug him better.
Timmy was not outside for no reason, as I discovered, after sitting on the lawn. Atop the lawn, was a fresh pile of his ****, which I sat on. In. On. Whatever. Wearing corduroy pants, as in so many situations, just made things worse.
Anyway, my mom was very angry and I made us late in going to whatever ****ty candy place we were going to, and I totally sat in dog ****.
The End.0 -
I'd like to say, in a very positive way, that we have become a people obsessed with whining and finger pointing.
Bullying hasn't increased, it's been defined down to the point that each and every whining little snowflake can claim to be bullied at the first sign of honest, frank disagreement, and thousands of other snowflakes will whine in agreement about how nasty all the bullies are.
Drive the disagreement out. Drive the humor out. Drive the life out.
Pathetic.
Disgustingly, pathetic.
I really really hate the term snowflake as it's used on here. yes, I am a special snowflake. deal with it.0 -
When it's all said and done I'm here to be surrounded with positive people who are here to support each other. Again I am not advocating any diet it was an example and I wont be apologizing to anyone for trying something once. Do I do things differently now yes cause I've learned. But the fact that that's all some of you focused on and not my message about being positive and helping each other is sad. However for those of you who truly took the time to read what I said and see that it was nothing more then me expressing my feelings about an experience I had (which I can do just like you all) , thank you. You have all been on forums and seen people made fun of , mean comments , and a group attacking someone's choice. I just don't like that and if that means I'm unrealistic that a bunch of over weight people can join together to support each other in a positive way then I guess I am. There are people everyday who feel that because their smaller they should tell me how to lose weight , on this site i experience rudness, mean comments, nasty emails with very vulgar language and things I wont even mention. I dont want that. the true spirit of this site is to encourage each other and that's what I'm here to do. Some people may not like the way I "stated " things or the words that I used but I wont apologize just like I wouldn't ask you to. Thank you for all of your post, concerns, lessons, and witty comments. I have learned that surrounding yourself with positive people is about picking those who are worth your time and throwing back the rest. People need different things to prosper and I'll just find people who fit my needs.
Have a great day guys ! God Bless!
Translation = You win, I lose. I'm taking my toys and going home now. Somebody, call my unicorn STAT....where are my rosy shades? That sun is shining so brightly I can barely see for all the shiny, reflective, happy people nearby. *prances off on the path of positivity*
Okay, I'm curious: Does anyone consider the above reply to be unnecessary and snarky in the context in which it was posted, or is this one the "helpful but misunderstood" posts that everyone's talking about? Maybe it's an example of "tough love"? Or is it "good humor"?
Well, I think it depends the the context. If it is in response to a serious discussion, it may be inappropriate and snarky. If it is in response to a humorous post (even a failed one) it could be appropriate and in the spirit of jest. :happy:0
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