This site should not be about weight loss bullies !

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  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    You are looking for confirmation that a bad diet (HCG) is the way to go!

    Sorry, I am not going to lobotomize myself to fit your cookie cutter world and no amount of name calling will make me support a protocol that is dangerous. I won't be bullied into supporting something that 20 years in the health field tells me is a very bad idea.

    Don't try to bully me into your crazy diet plans. Do it if you want but the second you promote it - I'm going to push back. The next thing you'll recommend is that I eat at 800 cals.

    I never said I was trying to force anyone to do anything. My point was be supportive of others and not negative.

    Negating something you say, if it's unsubstantiated and/or is dangerous, IS being supportive of good health. Like I said earlier, if you just want support of your own opinions, come out and say, "I only want people to agree with me" and friend those people. Negative =/= bad if it's people trying to help someone's health and well-being.
  • Jaulen
    Jaulen Posts: 468 Member
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    ^This.

    It makes my blood boil every time I see the word "bully" thrown around on here, because 90% of the time, no one is being bullied.

    i just want to chime in here and make an observation which i feel is a common trait amongst the folks being called bullies.

    take a look at the ticker for the member who posted the above quote. she has lost 134 lbs. she knows what she's doing. alot of the so-called bullies on here have similar success stories. the reason they comment on the bad information on these forums (and don't kid yourself, there is a lot of bad information being passed off as true) is because they've been down these roads before. they've learned what works, what doesn't, and what is harmful. they want to make the learning curve easier and faster for those who are new to this.

    i don't know her at all. she's not on my friend's list. i've seen her around the forums. but she is indicative of the sort of people who are providing real help here (as well as humor), only to be called meanies and bullies for it. to be honest, it would be comical if there wasn't a small segment of overly sensitive folks who have made it their task on MFP to stalk members like her, looking for things to report to the mods to try and get these people banned. that is no different in my mind that going down to your local public library and burning all of the books that you disagree with. when you do that, you remove information from your universe. as these folks get banned from here, the same thing happens. then this site will become nothing but a giant marketplace for people selling green coffee beans or raspberry ketones or meal replacement shakes to unsuspecting newbies.

    now i don't really know if anybody is stalking her, but there have been some knowledgeable folks banned here in the past couple of weeks, whose absence is already having an negative impact around here. so the next time one of you is tempted to get angry and cry, "Bully!", take a minute to look at the person's profile and see if it's somebody who has succeeded in this long "journey" already. odds are they have and they know exactly what it's like to be in your shoes. odds are also that they are really trying to help, even if it doesn't seem that way at the time. maybe, just maybe, if you ask them for clarification, you'll discover that somebody like that is EXACTLY who you want on your side.

    YEP. :drinker:

    :love:
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are, mostly?

    *kitten*. *kitten* covered *kitten* with *kitten* filling.

    Dr. Cox hit the nail right on the head. And add to that nastiness the anonymity that is the internet, and I'm shocked that you're shocked that there are negative people on a positive site.

    There are several people who are already fit, or only had a few pounds to lose - part of the "look at me, I'm so cool and sexy" crowd, they acted like that to begin with.

    The solution?

    Start kicking them in the shin.

    I'm a *kitten*. :embarassed:
  • SanteMulberry
    SanteMulberry Posts: 3,202 Member
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    i say eff those mean people!! Who cares how youre losing weight as long as youre making the effort for YOURSELF and losing it! thats just jerks who have no lives and want to be hateful! keep up the good work and dont lose your faith!! you can do it!!!! :)

    So, by this logic, it's okay to snort cocaine to suppress appetite, starve oneself for quick muscle, water, and overall weight loss, and take banned diet drugs that can result in heart attackes, seizures, strokes, or death?

    See why people say things?

    All of that is important to express concern over, but it can still be discussed in a kindly way.
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    By the way, two people have just advocated violence on the thread. None of the people disagreeing with your "diet" OP, or who are "snarky," have done this.

    Am I going to report them?

    No... because I can tell they're joking.
  • Siege_Tank
    Siege_Tank Posts: 781 Member
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    Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are, mostly?

    *kitten*. *kitten* covered *kitten* with *kitten* filling.

    Dr. Cox hit the nail right on the head. And add to that nastiness the anonymity that is the internet, and I'm shocked that you're shocked that there are negative people on a positive site.

    There are several people who are already fit, or only had a few pounds to lose - part of the "look at me, I'm so cool and sexy" crowd, they acted like that to begin with.

    The solution?

    Start kicking them in the shin.

    I'm a *kitten*. :embarassed:

    ME TOO!! :drinker:
  • cubbies77
    cubbies77 Posts: 607 Member
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    Sympathetic men are the reason for overweight women - not good to mix while in weight loss mode

    tumblr_meuxb0rj1V1ra4tnt.gif
  • dutchess4884
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    Thanks guys for all the support. Still makes me laugh that people can respond to this thread in a negative way or ask that it be taken down. Lets learn to be positive and treat others with respect. Again I'm here for positive support so lets focus on that.

    Did you even read anything that was said here?

    I actually did . I love the people who get my point that we are all equal. We are all here for the same reason and im looking for positive people to help me on my journey. For the others who have found another reason to try their hardest to disagree with someoneo all I can say is REALLY? This was supposed to be positive and some people still don't get that.
  • Siege_Tank
    Siege_Tank Posts: 781 Member
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    By the way, two people have just advocated violence on the thread. None of the people disagreeing with your "diet" OP, or who are "snarky," have done this.

    Am I going to report them?

    No... because I can tell they're joking.

    Hey now, I was honest to god advocating for violence and shin kicking. A little reality added to the existence of the internet might make the place a little more courteous! Like if you knew your mother was reading every word you typed...

    :grumble: crap, this IS public, she CAN read it all! :sad:
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
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    I haven't been on here too long, but have already learned a great deal. I've seen a lot of rudeness, sarcasm, and things of that nature, but I haven't run into any actual bullying. Yes there are people out there who are jerks just for the sake of being so, but there's actually good information hidden within some of that rudeness... at least from what I've seen so far on the forums. It's because of someone's snarky post that I went and found some calculators online to get my numbers in order (MFP had me too low I found out). It sounds like someone just got banned, and that person posted a very direct and somewhat sarcastic post about the benefits of adding strength training to one's workout (at least I think that was the person!). Thanks to that person, I've started working that into the rotation.

    If you see a subject that you might learn from, don't go in with a closed mind and/or a chip on your shoulder. It might just be me or it might be all the time I've observed trade chat in WoW, but it's easy to take the actual information out of a post, no matter how it's written, and go do something with it.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are, mostly?

    *kitten*. *kitten* covered *kitten* with *kitten* filling.

    Dr. Cox hit the nail right on the head. And add to that nastiness the anonymity that is the internet, and I'm shocked that you're shocked that there are negative people on a positive site.

    There are several people who are already fit, or only had a few pounds to lose - part of the "look at me, I'm so cool and sexy" crowd, they acted like that to begin with.

    The solution?

    Start kicking them in the shin.

    I'm a *kitten*. :embarassed:

    ME TOO!! :drinker:

    Really? Yay! New best friend! :drinker:
  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,463 Member
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    ^This.

    It makes my blood boil every time I see the word "bully" thrown around on here, because 90% of the time, no one is being bullied.

    i just want to chime in here and make an observation which i feel is a common trait amongst the folks being called bullies.

    take a look at the ticker for the member who posted the above quote. she has lost 134 lbs. she knows what she's doing. alot of the so-called bullies on here have similar success stories. the reason they comment on the bad information on these forums (and don't kid yourself, there is a lot of bad information being passed off as true) is because they've been down these roads before. they've learned what works, what doesn't, and what is harmful. they want to make the learning curve easier and faster for those who are new to this.

    i don't know her at all. she's not on my friend's list. i've seen her around the forums. but she is indicative of the sort of people who are providing real help here (as well as humor), only to be called meanies and bullies for it. to be honest, it would be comical if there wasn't a small segment of overly sensitive folks who have made it their task on MFP to stalk members like her, looking for things to report to the mods to try and get these people banned. that is no different in my mind that going down to your local public library and burning all of the books that you disagree with. when you do that, you remove information from your universe. as these folks get banned from here, the same thing happens. then this site will become nothing but a giant marketplace for people selling green coffee beans or raspberry ketones or meal replacement shakes to unsuspecting newbies.

    now i don't really know if anybody is stalking her, but there have been some knowledgeable folks banned here in the past couple of weeks, whose absence is already having an negative impact around here. so the next time one of you is tempted to get angry and cry, "Bully!", take a minute to look at the person's profile and see if it's somebody who has succeeded in this long "journey" already. odds are they have and they know exactly what it's like to be in your shoes. odds are also that they are really trying to help, even if it doesn't seem that way at the time. maybe, just maybe, if you ask them for clarification, you'll discover that somebody like that is EXACTLY who you want on your side.

    Well stated. There is a big difference between bullying and simply coming across a communication style or point of view that differs from your own. Quick cries of Bully! inhibit useful discussion and cause far more harm than a few sarcastic comments ever could. Sometimes the best support someone can receive is push back against their thinking.
  • toomuchbootyindapants
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    I actually did . I love the people who get my point that we are all equal. We are all here for the same reason and im looking for positive people to help me on my journey. For the others who have found another reason to try their hardest to disagree with someoneo all I can say is REALLY? This was supposed to be positive and some people still don't get that.

    But the title of your thread is negative in and of itself. "This site should NOT be about weight loss bullies" - not is negative. You started it off with a negative statement. Grammatically speaking, not even literal or subjective interpretation, it is negative. Ohhhh the irony.

    And HCG is bad. Very bad.
  • dutchess4884
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    By the way, two people have just advocated violence on the thread. None of the people disagreeing with your "diet" OP, or who are "snarky," have done this.

    Am I going to report them?

    No... because I can tell they're joking.

    First I never advocated a diet , I make my own choices because I'm an adult! I was simply giving an example of one of the topics that is used to bully people on this site . Yes I used the word again because that's exactly what I mean so thank you to everyone giving the grammar school lessons. Second you are all adults and I do not condone violence so please don't act like i have anything to do with or control of what comes out of others mouths. Third who said I reported anyone? I just chose to go on with my life and find positive people. I suggest you do the same.
  • dutchess4884
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    I actually did . I love the people who get my point that we are all equal. We are all here for the same reason and im looking for positive people to help me on my journey. For the others who have found another reason to try their hardest to disagree with someoneo all I can say is REALLY? This was supposed to be positive and some people still don't get that.

    But the title of your thread is negative in and of itself. "This site should NOT be about weight loss bullies" - not is negative. You started it off with a negative statement. Grammatically speaking, not even literal or subjective interpretation, it is negative. Ohhhh the irony.

    And HCG is bad. Very bad.

    REALLY?
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    By the way, two people have just advocated violence on the thread. None of the people disagreeing with your "diet" OP, or who are "snarky," have done this.

    Am I going to report them?

    No... because I can tell they're joking.

    First I never advocated a diet , I make my own choices because I'm an adult! I was simply giving an example of one of the topics that is used to bully people on this site . Yes I used the word again because that's exactly what I mean so thank you to everyone giving the grammar school lessons. Second you are all adults and I do not condone violence so please don't act like i have anything to do with or control of what comes out of others mouths. Third who said I reported anyone? I just chose to go on with my life and find positive people. I suggest you do the same.

    What a shame that you have clearly misunderstood not only the message you've put out with your post, but the responses you have received.

    I'm only hoping others read the thread and come away with a much clearer understanding of what "bullying," "support," and perhaps more importantly, "health," actually mean.
  • chocl8girl
    chocl8girl Posts: 1,968 Member
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    Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are, mostly?

    *kitten*. *kitten* covered *kitten* with *kitten* filling.

    Dr. Cox hit the nail right on the head. And add to that nastiness the anonymity that is the internet, and I'm shocked that you're shocked that there are negative people on a positive site.

    There are several people who are already fit, or only had a few pounds to lose - part of the "look at me, I'm so cool and sexy" crowd, they acted like that to begin with.

    The solution?

    Start kicking them in the shin.

    I like the creamy *kitten* filling. Mmmmmmmm....... :love:
  • TrailRunner61
    TrailRunner61 Posts: 2,505 Member
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    I wont apologize for telling people how bad hcg is. I'm here for support and to support others in their weight loss/exercise goals. If anyone brings up/asks about hcg in a forum, or one of my pals mentions it, I tell them how I feel. They, afterall, are the ones asking/talking about it.
    My niece nearly died from it after peeing black 'stuff'. She ended up in the hospital with severe kidney damage. I didn't like what she was doing, told her so and she still chose to use it.
    Ultimately, people have to make their own choices, but I don't want to see someone die from a 'quick fix' because they didn't know enough about it. That is all.
  • toomuchbootyindapants
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    I actually did . I love the people who get my point that we are all equal. We are all here for the same reason and im looking for positive people to help me on my journey. For the others who have found another reason to try their hardest to disagree with someoneo all I can say is REALLY? This was supposed to be positive and some people still don't get that.

    But the title of your thread is negative in and of itself. "This site should NOT be about weight loss bullies" - not is negative. You started it off with a negative statement. Grammatically speaking, not even literal or subjective interpretation, it is negative. Ohhhh the irony.

    And HCG is bad. Very bad.

    REALLY?

    Yeah.
  • WinnerVictorious
    WinnerVictorious Posts: 4,735 Member
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    By the way, two people have just advocated violence on the thread. None of the people disagreeing with your "diet" OP, or who are "snarky," have done this.

    Am I going to report them?

    No... because I can tell they're joking.

    First I never advocated a diet , I make my own choices because I'm an adult! I was simply giving an example of one of the topics that is used to bully people on this site . Yes I used the word again because that's exactly what I mean so thank you to everyone giving the grammar school lessons. Second you are all adults and I do not condone violence so please don't act like i have anything to do with or control of what comes out of others mouths. Third who said I reported anyone? I just chose to go on with my life and find positive people. I suggest you do the same.

    can i ask you a question? this is a serious question because i'm trying to figure out exactly where you draw the line.

    what if you came on here and announced that you were shooting heroin because it suppressed your appetite and allowed you to lose weight?

    what should we say to you? since you only want support, should we just ignore your thread because we can't support you? or should we yell, "STOP! what are you doing to yourself?!"

    in a situation like that, i really don't know what you think the forum should say to you that's "supportive".

    now, if you substituted "heroin" with some dangerous diet pill like "Xiushentang" in the above example. what should we say then? you can actually die from Xiushentang too. and if it's ok to tell you "NO!" to the diet pill, why can't we also say no to HCG if it is just as harmful?

    if somebody was scolding you for using HCG, maybe it wasn't because they didn't want to support you... maybe it was because they were truly scared for your health and well-being.