How many dates should a guy pay for?

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Replies

  • RLDeShazo
    RLDeShazo Posts: 356 Member





    So at this point for a guy it is a damned if you do and damned if you don't. I went on a date and the girl did the grab her purse to offer to pay I said no I got it, but she insisted, so I let her pay her half. I ran into her a couple of month after that and asked what happened because we had a great date, she told me she thought I was cheap cause I let her pay.

    So like I said for guys it is rough because a lot a women want their cake and want to eat it too.

    aren't you glad that something as superficial as not being a mind reader got you off the hook with her from the beginning?
  • kdaxon
    kdaxon Posts: 340 Member
    If im paying you better be givin it up later....just sayin.
  • TheDoctorDana
    TheDoctorDana Posts: 595 Member
    All of them.
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    If im paying you better be givin it up later....just sayin.


    How you doin'?
  • kdaxon
    kdaxon Posts: 340 Member
    If im paying you better be givin it up later....just sayin.


    How you doin'?

    Wanna go to dinner? ;)
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    If im paying you better be givin it up later....just sayin.


    How you doin'?

    Wanna go to dinner? ;)

    Yeah I do!
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
    So at this point for a guy it is a damned if you do and damned if you don't. I went on a date and the girl did the grab her purse to offer to pay I said no I got it, but she insisted, so I let her pay her half. I ran into her a couple of month after that and asked what happened because we had a great date, she told me she thought I was cheap cause I let her pay.

    So like I said for guys it is rough because a lot a women want their cake and want to eat it too.

    aren't you glad that something as superficial as not being a mind reader got you off the hook with her from the beginning?

    Seriously, haha. I would've needed Mel Gibson mind reading powers to survive her. I'm lucky that I'm mentally capable of bouncing back, but some guys aren't and I feel bad for them having to be stuck in a "mindfcuk" situation like that.
  • FarAway02
    FarAway02 Posts: 211
    I'll always offer to pay/get the next round etc. If they're the kind of guy who doesn't feel comfortable with a girl paying (although why they wouldn't I really don't know) then I won't push it.... but I don't believe in expecting the guy to pay.

    We spend so much time arguing about how we ought to be treated equal...and then half of us expect the bloke to fit the bill???

    My boyfriend and I informally split it... he'll get one thing, I'll get the next etc. Sometimes one of us will specifically say 'I'm going to take YOU out' (this normally occurs after one of our pay days, LOL) in which case that person pays.
  • RllyGudTweetr
    RllyGudTweetr Posts: 2,019 Member
    I'll always offer to pay/get the next round etc. If they're the kind of guy who doesn't feel comfortable with a girl paying (although why they wouldn't I really don't know) then I won't push it.... but I don't believe in expecting the guy to pay.
    Note that some earlier posters used a similar strategy of offering to pay, only to write off the guys that accepted the offer as somehow unsuitable.
  • mperrott2205
    mperrott2205 Posts: 737 Member
    We spend so much time arguing about how we ought to be treated equal...and then half of us expect the bloke to fit the bill???

    Spot on with this.

    This is why I can't take the feminist argument seriously, they don't want to be treated equally - they want to be treated better. Humanism is a far better cause to support.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Until you're married, , , all of them!

    ....but why?
    -doesn't believe in this-
  • Sbrn_
    Sbrn_ Posts: 351 Member
    I prefer to split it down the middle the majority of the time, with sometimes me paying for it all and sometimes him paying as an occasional treat for one-another. Things are equal that way. There's no one way of doing it. It depends on the two individuals and what they prefer.
  • LeiaLemon
    LeiaLemon Posts: 25
    It should 100% be up to the people who are looking to date, establish if it's dutch, the guy pays or the girl wants to pay... I chose to split the bill on the 1st date with my current beau. And now after a year we do a lot of trading off but never really keep track of who pays what.
  • BrokenButBeautiful
    BrokenButBeautiful Posts: 939
    All the dates.
  • tuckerrj
    tuckerrj Posts: 1,453 Member
    Until you're married, , , all of them!

    ....but why?
    -doesn't believe in this-

    Because I'm 55 years old and that's the way I was raised. I dunno about the twenty somethings. But if I want a woman to know that I cherish her, making her pay "her half" on a date, ain't the way to do it!
  • mrphil86
    mrphil86 Posts: 2,382 Member
    We are all equal...

    Except when it comes to dating... Than we are not equal.

    First date or two I can understand. However if she continues to want me to pay, it's all good if a girl wants that. I'll just pick her up on a white steed and a full suit of armor. We can then have a picnic on the hills and eat mutton chops.
  • sweetcurlz67
    sweetcurlz67 Posts: 1,168 Member
    This may seem weird but I really like it when he pays. I sincerely offer to help every single time. If I end up dating someone long enough, i will get to the point where I insist on paying during regular intervals as I won't want to feel like I'm taking advantage of him.
  • EllieB_5
    EllieB_5 Posts: 247 Member
    I always offered to pay my share, the guy usually refused, I tell them it's no problem (for me to pitch in), guy still refused and pays the bill. If the guy was worth it I would at times tell him I'm taking him on a date and order him to leave his wallet at home.

    I don't think anybody should be obligated to pay for every single date. What I think is the asker should be paying the bill. Even being a woman if you're bugging your boyfriend/husband to go out on a date you should be paying for it. He never takes you out you say? Three easy solutions: pay for the dates enough times and the dude will man up; do things he enjoys doing not just what you like, for example take him to a sports bar to watch his fave team and dine on wings all night; dump his sorry @ss if he doesn't think you deserve to be treated once in a while.


    It just occurred to me for some odd reason: what do homo/bisexuals, etc do? If you're of the same gender this "the man should pay" doesn't really apply does it :tongue:
  • _101010_
    _101010_ Posts: 121
    Whoever has more money should pay. The poor shouldnt be treating others out to dinner much anyway.
  • EllieB_5
    EllieB_5 Posts: 247 Member
    Whoever has more money should pay. The poor shouldnt be treating others out to dinner much anyway.

    I'm not sure if finances are really discussed at any point within the first 10 dates or more. At least, I've never asked a guy how much he made and the "what do you do for a living" shouldn't come till much later since it's practically the same question. In a committed relationship, sure, the bread winner should take the other out more often. But the poorer person should be making it worth their SO's while *nudgenudgewinkwinksaynomoresaynomore*
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Whoever has more money should pay. The poor shouldnt be treating others out to dinner much anyway.
    Just because one has less money does not give them the right to mooch off the one that has more.

    Edit: DANG IT, brain... -shakes fist-
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
    Pretty much all of them... the only few dates I've ever paid for is if I have been the one to make the plans and it involved buying tickets or something in advance. I pretty much go for men from very traditional cultures so he gets the honor or paying for our dates.... and if we wind up getting married, I get the honor of cooking and cleaning for him until I die so I guess it all works out in the end.
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    I always want to pay for myself

    & I am broke as a joke soooooooooo I never go on dates unless they are the free kind
  • mrphil86
    mrphil86 Posts: 2,382 Member
    I always want to pay for myself

    & I am broke as a joke soooooooooo I never go on dates unless they are the free kind

    Oh rilly?? How you doin? :)
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    I always want to pay for myself

    & I am broke as a joke soooooooooo I never go on dates unless they are the free kind

    Oh rilly?? How you doin? :)

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  • elusive_design
    elusive_design Posts: 1,095 Member
    They who invite and make the plan pay the bill. It's as simple as that. If I invite someone to dinner, regardless of the reason I am going to be paying. It is my responsibility. It's not a standard I hold other people to. That being said.. if you are dating someone, not just going on a date, that is a little bit different. I have in the past turned that into a game of who can find the most creative way to pay before the other person thinks to get their money out.
  • gunshowgreg
    gunshowgreg Posts: 169 Member
    I think it not gentleman like if I don't pay for the date. But there is exceptions if I got a surprise or something. I like to be old fashioned. Even after I got married I still opened the car door for my wife and I plan to do the same for my daughter
  • mrphil86
    mrphil86 Posts: 2,382 Member
    I always want to pay for myself

    & I am broke as a joke soooooooooo I never go on dates unless they are the free kind

    Oh rilly?? How you doin? :)

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  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
    I think it's nice to split the bill, eliminates expectations.
  • laynerich15
    laynerich15 Posts: 1,918 Member
    ALL OF THEM.

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