My Online BF Dumped Me Because I'm Fat :( :( :(

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  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
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    The problem I have is with the word "Online".

    Stick to REAL men in the REAL world.

    There are some REAL wack jobs in the real world too.

    Yes, but we usually figure that out LONG before we invest any time, effort or emotional commitment to them.
  • TheWiseCat
    TheWiseCat Posts: 297
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    ONLINE BOYFRIEND?

    what is this?

    I also lost her at "online boyfriend".


    and you're replying because???????

    Anyway, OP sorry ma....rejection is never a good feeling. Just know he wasnt worth it.....

    I do not see why I should explain myself to some random chick on the internet, miss thang.

    I dont understand how you can not figure out what "online boyfriend" means yet you are still able to make the internet work. Does someone help you with it?

    xmpx.gif
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
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    Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!





    That's all I got.
  • perfekta
    perfekta Posts: 331 Member
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    He's unstable, and a d bag. Consider yourself lucky that you aren't wasting anymore time on him.
  • jkestens63
    jkestens63 Posts: 1,164 Member
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    Sounds like you avoided the train to crazy town.

    I would have ept the phone.
  • alimauer
    alimauer Posts: 33 Member
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    ONLINE BOYFRIEND?

    what is this?

    I also lost her at "online boyfriend".


    and you're replying because???????

    Anyway, OP sorry ma....rejection is never a good feeling. Just know he wasnt worth it.....

    I do not see why I should explain myself to some random chick on the internet, miss thang.

    I dont understand how you can not figure out what "online boyfriend" means yet you are still able to make the internet work. Does someone help you with it?

    You might want to check the 'tude at the door. I never said I don't know what it MEANS, now did I? I said I LOST her there, does not mean I don't know what it means. I guess we all need to learn how to read at one point, right? ;)


    I do not see why you feel it would be necessary for you to make such an ignorant comment on someones post when they are CLEARLY going through something that YOU OBVIOUSLY do not relate to in anyway. And by putting "online boyfriend" in quotations you are defiantly either belittling the matter or something. And as far as your smart *kitten* remarks I would just save them for ANOTHER BLOG, because the people here are all on a weight loss journey and we all have insecurities and are obviously hear to do something about it. So it is just rude

    . "Someone needs a little CLASS"
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    Like you said maybe he was lying....maybe he was lying about being in the military... what would she have to gain lying about something like this to strangers?

    Definition of Troll
    From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    In Internet slang, a troll (pron.: /ˈtroʊl/, /ˈtrɒl/) is someone who posts inflammatory,[1] extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community, such as a forum, chat room, or blog, with the primary intent of provoking readers into an emotional response[2] or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.[3] The noun troll may also refer to the provocative message itself, as in: "That was an excellent troll you posted."

    Even giving her the benefit of the doubt and assuming he was the crazy lier, where exactly do you see that story showing he dumped her for her weight besides the title? And to your point, what does she have to gain posting this to a bunch of strangers besides comfort and sympathy....which really doesn't mean diddly squat coming from a bunch of random anonymous folks on the internet!?

    I really do hate to be a cynic sometimes but let's face facts and call this one a troll.
  • charlesnapolitano
    charlesnapolitano Posts: 302 Member
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    my brother in law is in the army there is no way this guy was He was also overweight, 5'5" and about 250-260 lbs....they would kick him out
  • Viva81Diva
    Viva81Diva Posts: 148
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    Dude sounds messed up, like PTSD or something. He needs help and, either you can deal with it, or you're better off away. Probably the latter.

    Many soldiers who deploy come back changed. Even though they are trained to "fight" for our country, it doesn't prepare for reality, when they are faced with these circumstances and are witness to traumatizing events. They have treatments in the military that will help soldiers with their PTSD so they may cope with their experiences and every day life. Life doesn't always return to normal for some.

    It truly sounds like he had an episode with you, and the alcohol didn't help. Thing about alcohol is that it is the most abused drug in the service. I can't tell you how many soldiers young and older I have met throughout the years who are already full blown alcoholics/or near the verge of becoming one.

    Although it is hard not to take it personally, try not to blame yourself for this. You saw the good in this man, and he apparently has a dark side. There should be major caution taken around people who snap like that, especially when alcohol is involved. He probably didn't want you to see that, and so he was hateful toward you so you wouldn't see him like that.

    It can be hard being involved with someone in the military. I grew up in a military home, and although there is structure, there are also many things that I have seen and gone through that could outweigh the positive. I've seen PTSD and the ones who have it need to seek help continuously. The ones who love and support that person would benefit from help, too. It can be hurtful to be a victim to it, but I've found it's best to leave them be when they have episodes.

    Do you want to live your life worrying about when he will snap again? Just keep your chin up and know that you are wonderful and deserve to be treated like you deserve the stars! :)
  • jchenks
    jchenks Posts: 164 Member
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    Wait - he's a soldier and he weighs 250+ at 5'5"? did anyone else stop there knowing this was all a BS story?

    YES! THANK YOU. and the fact that he asked for wet wipes... What man asks for wet wipes?
  • FrnkLft
    FrnkLft Posts: 1,821 Member
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    I fail to see where he dumped you because you are fat...

    Aside from that, the guy just got back from war, and developing and maintaining a relationship given the circumstances was bound to be tough and prone to failing like this.

    I'm really not excusing his behavior, not at all, but I wouldn't beat yourself up about it at all. Really it's definitely a shame, but moving on is likely the best option.
  • Stronger_Diva
    Stronger_Diva Posts: 149 Member
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    O_o

    I'm very confused. No where is it mentioned (and yes I read the whole thing) that this man stopped talking to you because of your weight.

    This man has issues. He did you a favor, now do one for yourself and run away FAST.

    Best.
  • charlesnapolitano
    charlesnapolitano Posts: 302 Member
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    Wait - he's a soldier and he weighs 250+ at 5'5"? did anyone else stop there knowing this was all a BS story?

    YES! THANK YOU. and the fact that he asked for wet wipes... What man asks for wet wipes?

    like i said my brother in law is in the army...he is a lifer and there is no way this story is true and people are gulliable
  • FrnkLft
    FrnkLft Posts: 1,821 Member
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    Wait - he's a soldier and he weighs 250+ at 5'5"? did anyone else stop there knowing this was all a BS story?

    YES! THANK YOU. and the fact that he asked for wet wipes... What man asks for wet wipes?

    Lol, fair point.
  • TheWiseCat
    TheWiseCat Posts: 297
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    Wait - he's a soldier and he weighs 250+ at 5'5"? did anyone else stop there knowing this was all a BS story?

    YES! THANK YOU. and the fact that he asked for wet wipes... What man asks for wet wipes?

    I do after I eat oily chips. I can't be having my face breaking out. Girl, don't you go starting some ratchet business 'bout a man's ability to take care of his appearance!
  • Nietzscheandchocolate
    Nietzscheandchocolate Posts: 1
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    I don't think it has anything to do with your weight. Sometimes when we feel rejected, we blame it on ourselves and try to explain it through our own insecurities. Logically, I think he is having an inferiority complex because of his very obvious PTSD issues, he probably feels like you deserve better, someone who doesn't come with bagage. Some people are just emotionally stupid and dont understand how to say things the right way so they take drastic measures, add drinks and mental illness to the mix, and you have a mess of a situation. Whenever I feel rejected or misled I go into overdrive, I feel even more committed to self improvement in order to prove that person wrong, to show myself and him that I am better then that. I know it can be hard to understand that it isn't your fault or your weight that caused him to go off the deep end, so empower yourself to become the best person you can be, and imerge from the situation with your head held high, you have so much to live for, and so much love to receive! I PROMISE! Also, my mom was over 300 pounds after she divorced my dad, she is a kindergarden teacher, she slowly started losing weight and in the middle of that process met a man 10 years younger who was a single dad of one of her students, he instantly fell in love with the way she was with children. My mom is now at a healthier weight, takes pride in her appearance and is in a loving Marriage like she never had with my dad. It's NEVER too late, and a real man will love you and grow with you regardless of your current weight. She was also 45 when she met him. My moms story always really inspires me when I am feeling unloved and hopeless, maybe it will also inspire you to never give up on what you deserve.
  • squatsandlipgloss
    squatsandlipgloss Posts: 595 Member
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    ONLINE BOYFRIEND?

    what is this?

    I also lost her at "online boyfriend".


    and you're replying because???????

    Anyway, OP sorry ma....rejection is never a good feeling. Just know he wasnt worth it.....

    I do not see why I should explain myself to some random chick on the internet, miss thang.

    I dont understand how you can not figure out what "online boyfriend" means yet you are still able to make the internet work. Does someone help you with it?

    You might want to check the 'tude at the door. I never said I don't know what it MEANS, now did I? I said I LOST her there, does not mean I don't know what it means. I guess we all need to learn how to read at one point, right? ;)


    I do not see why you feel it would be necessary for you to make such an ignorant comment on someones post when they are CLEARLY going through something that YOU OBVIOUSLY do not relate to in anyway. And by putting "online boyfriend" in quotations you are defiantly either belittling the matter or something. And as far as your smart *kitten* remarks I would just save them for ANOTHER BLOG, because the people here are all on a weight loss journey and we all have insecurities and are obviously hear to do something about it. So it is just rude

    . "Someone needs a little CLASS"

    LMFAO is it a full moon tonight?

    I put "online boyfriend" in quotes because it was a quote!!!

    I feel like some of you have not been on the boards a lot to get so frustrated about people not taking things too seriously and joking around a bit. It's an online forum, not a psychiatrist's office.
  • chatogal
    chatogal Posts: 436 Member
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    The problem I have is with the word "Online".

    Stick to REAL men in the REAL world.

    lol have to laff at this one. I met my husband "on line" 13 years ago and another continent away, been living together 9 years and married for 5. Included living in 2 different countries 3000 miles apart. We didnt meet on a dating site but in a chat room. We are two professional people (he is a teacher, I am a midwife/nurse). I assure you, he seems PERFECTLY real to me :-)
  • kt_731
    kt_731 Posts: 74 Member
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    it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.

    I. Hate. This. Statement.

    AGREED.

    I don't know if this story is true or not, but if it is...there is absolutely no way it has anything to do with weight.

    Could be two things:
    1. Obviously this dude has serious trust issues. When he met you and seen that you were into him he probably got scared and worried that this happy situation would end badly like it has before in his past. Sometimes its easier to avoid putting yourself out there again after being hurt. Its scary to take the risk and sometimes people rather just avoid it all together.

    OR

    2. This dude is still married and full of BEEP. He wanted something on the side because he is bored with his wife. When it came to the time of meeting you he tried to get wasted to get the courage to cheat and immediately regretted the decision.
  • squatsandlipgloss
    squatsandlipgloss Posts: 595 Member
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    Wait - he's a soldier and he weighs 250+ at 5'5"? did anyone else stop there knowing this was all a BS story?

    YES! THANK YOU. and the fact that he asked for wet wipes... What man asks for wet wipes?

    Lol, fair point.

    :laugh:
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