Catty Women

oregonzoo

No, they're not all catty. I have a tight group of RL girl friends and they're lovely people.

When you're happy with how you look yourself and confident about the person you are yourself you don't need to put other women down to make yourself feel better. I've never understood it.

I don't like those kind of women and I don't engage in that kind of petty BS.

It's ugly and toxic.

This times 100. It's really simple.

ohmscheeks

While picking apart strangers isn't my poison of choice. This is a "no harm, no foul" situation. The "officer's wife" was indisputably unaffected by their taunts.

And you are... What? A transgender? Or? Just wondering...

AmandaJCole13

Also, internalized misogyny is a very sad thing to see.

^THIS!!!

How can women expect to quit be objectified, if so many women are still objectifying each other!

FlaxMilk

May have been said already, but what is it called when men make fun of other men who don't do leg day or say, "Do you even lift, bro?" Do you really believe men aren't making judgments about the woman out there? In a positive or negative way? How do you know what is said about her by the men in her life who see her?

Why can't people in general be insecure and threatened and have the ability to trash others? Why does it just have to be women? Is it catty to talk about women and state you don't have female friends because women are catty? The "I'm not like other women, I'm better than that" is just another way of being catty and bringing others down by making yourself feel superior (you in general, not you OP) which is no better than trashing a woman's appearance to feel better.

I had friends who I would get uncomfortable with for trashing others (who were nice) because they didn't like the way they dressed (too boring, not too provocative.) There were men and women in that group. It bothered me equally, so I would say something every time.

FlaxMilk

I am a woman, so I know that we aren't all like that. I've just yet to encounter many that when presented with this type of scenario that don't make stupid comments. Maybe I don't have many female friends because they don't like it when I call them out on stuff instead.

It's probably all the other women or probably your attitude towards other women?

I work in a largely female dominated work environment. The women and men I work with are all pretty awesome, and we do our share of complaining, but I don't see much of anyone being mean to be mean. People usually complain about problems, not people, and we don't waste our time worrying about who is a prostitute or not.

So, to answer your question, no, we aren't all like that, and we can socialize in groups without succumbing to a pack mentality. Anyone with a bad attitude represents herself or himself, not the gender group.

(I know some truly beautiful on the outside women, and a number of them are truly beautiful on the inside. I admire them, not pick them apart.)

FlaxMilk

And someone called me sexist because due to my experiences I think most women are catty? I hate to say it, but I almost hope someone does file a lawsuit. That's extremely ridiculous.

Do you not understand how you making claims (especially as a woman) that most women are catty promotes this stereotype, which promotes this attitude, which promotes the behavior of discriminating by essentially saying the discrimination is tolerable, permissible, and perhaps, even necessary?

Have you experienced most women?

sm1zzle

this

foleyshirley

I mean they referred to her as being a prostitute and everything else. I'm sitting there thinking that I couldn't imagine being this woman and feeling that kind of venom just for being pretty. I spoke up and said that I bet she's super nice and called them out on it, but they didn't care.

Enjoy posting your success thread on MFP and watching other women find any way they can to insinuate you faked your results or backhanded compliments about how you've made SOME progress.

BS. I am in the forums all the time, and do not see this at all.

LMT2012

I don't see it as cattiness, as much as women placing importance on things that I do not necessarily find important. If someone is pretty...isn't that nice? Who cares? Girly sh#t mostly does not make my radar, so I have to pretend sometimes, but never with my close friends.

betterthanbefpre

No, but this does happen when there are lots of insecurities. Good for you for not chiming in. Don't be shocked if one of them comes in with bleached blonde hair and another with fake boobs. They hate because they want to be her.

silverlining84

I've noticed women tend to be catty or make snap judgements if they see someone pretty. I tend to avoid the "mean girls" and the snarky comments they make about other females.

gertudejekyl

females are often sickeningly sweet

cuterbee

Sometimes if you have one person in the group who likes to put down others, eventually everyone gets sucked into doing the same thing (men do it too). If someone starts making those comments, express your displeasure or discomfort with catty remarks and it will stop (at least where you can hear it; and maybe altogether) because a lot of people feel uncomfortable saying that stuff if they know someone else will call them on it. They know it's not right and it's not polite, but a few people stirring the pot will have everyone doing it if no one puts their foot down.

If you hear that stuff and say nothing, you are part of the problem.

I work in an almost all-woman office (we have one guy, who usually is too busy to interact much with us). They're awesome. If people are having a bad day, they might complain about the weather, the situation, their family...but I never hear them complaining about the people they work with or other women.

celtbell3

I think it depends. There are some women who are wonderful and supportive and then there are the *****es. Good that you stuck up for the lady. I bet the office gals are thinking about how they acted like jealous jerks!