Embarrassed to go jogging because of pervs.

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Replies

  • aimforhealthy
    aimforhealthy Posts: 449 Member
    No one has any way of knowing if a guy who yells "Nice *kitten*!" in a passing van is or isn't a predator and is or isn't going to escalate it. You may be able to ignore it, but it's pretty gross that people are belittling women who don't feel comfortable or safe in those situations, especially someone as young as the OP.
  • Gidzmo
    Gidzmo Posts: 905 Member
    Suggest either running with friends (safety in numbers) or running with a dog (borrow Kong from the neighbor, if need be).
  • FromHereOnOut
    FromHereOnOut Posts: 3,237 Member
    So, seriously, consider going to a local run shop (running shoe shop) and asking where people run. There are also websites where people map their favorite running spots (I've gotten some good ideas from this one: walkjogrun.net . Try to go where there are already runners. I go to an enclosed, dog-free park with a half-mile shaded semi-inclined/declined dirt track around it and there are lots of race-trainers and daily runners there. I have an even better place to route nearer my home, but there are sometimes stray dogs who are very docile towards walkers, children, tourists, but enjoy "chasing" cars, bikes, and runners. So, I just stick to the best place I've found. Also, there may be organized runs. My city has one every Sunday evening that follows a very central route for about 5k--it is partially in traffic, but they just use strength in numbers & advertise the run on facebook, etc, b/c the more there are, the easier it is to claim the road for 30-40minutes. A run shop is most likely to know about this. Also, try meetup.com for running groups. Even if you don't run with the group, join to see what routes they use. (And also, dress appropriately if you don't want attention. I've seen some girls at the park who needed to be told to buy 2 sports bras and wear them both...when they run EVERYone stares guys & girls--and to me it looks painful to be bouncing like that.)
  • cheesyrunner
    cheesyrunner Posts: 84 Member
    I feel weird about it too. I get leered at by males, whether I’m walking to a bus stop or I’m taking the dog for a walk. Yes, it makes me feel uncomfortable but to make myself feel better, I tell myself the catcalls are harmless and occur because I’m attractive (egotistical thinking but it’s better than the alternative aka I’m viewed as an object and i should worry over the stranger following me or something). I also try and believe that strangers won’t expound the situation by following me or anything ridiculous but I’ve had an instance of just that. My advice would to run with dogs or friends and a phone but to ignore it. Anyway... Objectification should not occur. I know someone has called this thread “ridiculous”. Wow - That's such an ignorant mentality lol. How old are you, man, or do you just not get it? Nobody deserves to be victimised or made to feel like they are unsafe through the actions of others. This is a legitimate topic and i wish more males responded to this... Do you refrain from catcalling, why/why not? Do you think it’s harmless to throw a comment out a window, in a passing car, or to slow down? Do you understand why there would be some cause for worry, among female runners?
  • jimmmer
    jimmmer Posts: 3,515 Member
    Why don't I ever get people perving on me when I'm out running? Is there something wrong with me? I'm going to develop a complex now......
  • vstraughan
    vstraughan Posts: 163 Member
    Ooooh multiple choice Friday :-)

    You said 'embarrassed' not that you're worried about safety so here goes ...

    a) get some noise cancelling headphones and ignore

    b) treat them as your own personal cheering squad

    c) watch carefully, there could be a hot one out there :-)

    d) train your brain to not give a toss what other people think

    e) if people perv, take it as a compliment

    f) if people laugh ... well ... typically they are the ones who do no exercise and probably have a lard *kitten*, feel pity for them
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
    Ooooh multiple choice Friday :-)

    You said 'embarrassed' not that you're worried about safety so here goes ...

    a) get some noise cancelling headphones and ignore

    b) treat them as your own personal cheering squad

    c) watch carefully, there could be a hot one out there :-)

    d) train your brain to not give a toss what other people think

    e) if people perv, take it as a compliment

    f) if people laugh ... well ... typically they are the ones who do no exercise and probably have a lard *kitten*, feel pity for them

    g) Get some real freakin problems

    Also, it's a bit hard to tell for us guys to know which girls enjoy being cat called in which ones don't.

    Perhaps all you ladies could get together and divisive some sort of sign or symbol that signifies the one's that don't like being cat called and the ones that do.
  • ms_leanne
    ms_leanne Posts: 523 Member
    Some towns have their own running clubs which are good because you learn interval training too which can definitely help. As someone already said I would head down to a running shop to see if they have details of local groups.

    I run on the pavements in my town and have had 1 maybe 2 beeps but tbh I just think "Meh" and carry on. I know why I am doing this which matters so much more than a few morons!

    Oooh P.S. there are also lots of local park runs in the UK. See if you have a local one. x
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
    awwwww too pretty to run.

    What an entitled thing to say. As if pretty women deserve sexual harassment and it's a "compliment"? No, dude, it's really not.
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
    In honor of this ridiculous thread, I am going to yell "nice *kitten*" to a young female jogger tomorrow

    Oh, wow, more sexist entitlement. Yeah, dude, it's super ridiculous to be objectified on a daily basis. A lot of awful comments here!

    Women are PEOPLE, not pretty decoration for men.
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
    awwwww too pretty to run.

    What an entitled thing to say. As if pretty women deserve sexual harassment and it's a "compliment"? No, dude, it's really not.

    That's just your opinion.

    'Cat calling' when done correctly can be quite an efficient way of getting a girls number.

    You just have to be respectful about it.

    For example:

    "Hey toots why don't you come over here and sit on my lap!"

    Can easily be

    "Hey beautiful why don't you come over here and sit on my lap please!"
  • Flab2fitfi
    Flab2fitfi Posts: 1,349 Member
    When I ran outside, I found a park that was mostly mothers and the elderly. Every other runner was too interested in their own workout to bother with me. Find someplace comfortable, stick in your headphones, and zone out for your run.

    ditto i plug the earphones in and off I go. I run along the main road which is very busy and totally zone out. I also run into the traffic (on the pavement) so its harder for cars to stop/slow done.
  • Know what you mean, just building up to go for first jog in a year, Its true I also find it intimidating running, especially past groups of lads or building sites, so try and avoid public roads, or go out at night.

    Best I've seen though is a group of lads hanging out their car window curb crawling and wolf whistling a long haired slim blond in front of me, only for the blond to turn around and was a guy. Classic! Don't know who was more mortified.

    This curb crawling thing depends where you live I think, I'm in a small uk town with a lot of hopeless boy racers, with nothing better to do . When I visit my bro in OZ the outdoor run lifestyle is common place where he lives and no one batters an eyelid. They all super crazy fit and buff.
  • BonaFideUK
    BonaFideUK Posts: 313 Member
    Get some earphones so you cant hear anyone. Or perhaps run with a dog to feel safer.
  • MsEmmy
    MsEmmy Posts: 254 Member
    I am actually APPALLED at the number of people who think this situation is funny, or that a woman is asking for catcalls because she wears a close fitting top while running or because her boobs might bounce a bit, or that it is a compliment.

    It is not a compliment. Most of the time they are deliberately trying to make you uncomfortable or show off in front of their buddies. It's not big, it's not clever, and we definitely shouldn't have to accept it!

    If someone is calling out at you or whatever because you are a woman, and you are on your own it is quite intimidating. It's not funny at all. It's sexist *kitten* and by saying it's ok a lot of you are condoning it. And if it stops the OP doing wehat she wants in a supposedly free country then it is a REAL PROBLEM. What does she have to do, wait til someone jumps out and grabs her before it is a real problem? Genuine fear is a real problem.

    And as for the people who say the OP is attention seeking....f*£king hell.
  • luceegj
    luceegj Posts: 246 Member
    Just think those perv old men just wish they go home everyday to you and not some women sitting in an arm chair, with a *kitten* and a glass of vodka, thinning hair, tacky tattoo! BLAH BLAH BLAH! :D
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
    I am actually APPALLED at the number of people who think this situation is funny, or that a woman is asking for catcalls because she wears a close fitting top while running or because her boobs might bounce a bit, or that it is a compliment.

    It is not a compliment. Most of the time they are deliberately trying to make you uncomfortable or show off in front of their buddies. It's not big, it's not clever, and we definitely shouldn't have to accept it!

    If someone is calling out at you or whatever because you are a woman, and you are on your own it is quite intimidating. It's not funny at all. It's sexist *kitten* and by saying it's ok a lot of you are condoning it.

    I don't think anyone is condoning being disrespectful to women. And while you may find it offensive and degrading some women find it flattering. Others just find it funny, roll their eyes, and move on with their day.

    I've been cat called by a group of women before. They weren't at a construction site they were in a limo celebrating something I can only assume to be a bachelorette party. So it really does go both ways. This isn't a male vs. female thing.

    Also since you brought up entitlement what makes you the voice for all other women?
  • cheexy85
    cheexy85 Posts: 119
    I actually find it amusing when people whistle at me. I got that a lot last sunday when I wore a nice summer dress. Personally, I see it as a compliment. Your mindset matters you know... Relax and enjoy life (IMHO of course...)
  • cheexy85
    cheexy85 Posts: 119
    Ooooh multiple choice Friday :-)

    You said 'embarrassed' not that you're worried about safety so here goes ...

    a) get some noise cancelling headphones and ignore

    b) treat them as your own personal cheering squad

    c) watch carefully, there could be a hot one out there :-)

    d) train your brain to not give a toss what other people think

    e) if people perv, take it as a compliment

    f) if people laugh ... well ... typically they are the ones who do no exercise and probably have a lard *kitten*, feel pity for them

    Love this...
  • pillybee
    pillybee Posts: 3 Member
    I burn up to 500cal a day walking for two hours through parks and streets, as long as you keep moving, wearing trackpants and loose fitting top with my hair in a bun, believe me nobody looks at you. It all depends what your wearing do you want to draw attention to yourself. Its your life forget about them.
  • MsEmmy
    MsEmmy Posts: 254 Member
    I am actually APPALLED at the number of people who think this situation is funny, or that a woman is asking for catcalls because she wears a close fitting top while running or because her boobs might bounce a bit, or that it is a compliment.

    It is not a compliment. Most of the time they are deliberately trying to make you uncomfortable or show off in front of their buddies. It's not big, it's not clever, and we definitely shouldn't have to accept it!

    If someone is calling out at you or whatever because you are a woman, and you are on your own it is quite intimidating. It's not funny at all. It's sexist *kitten* and by saying it's ok a lot of you are condoning it.

    I don't think anyone is condoning being disrespectful to women. And while you may find it offensive and degrading some women find it flattering. Others just find it funny, roll their eyes, and move on with their day.

    I've been cat called by a group of women before. They weren't at a construction site they were in a limo celebrating something I can only assume to be a bachelorette party. So it really does go both ways. This isn't a male vs. female thing.

    Also since you brought up entitlement what makes you the voice for all other women?

    If women need strange men howling at them from the street to find their strength then we need to educate women more.

    And I never said I was the voice for all women, I was merely empathising with the OP.

    And I didn't bring up entitlement, I brought up manners.
  • melb_alex
    melb_alex Posts: 1,154 Member
    Ermaigod!!!! People are looking and honking at me! Let me post a thread for more attention . . .

    I think if she wanted attention she might have a photo of herself up. Maybe flexing in a mirror?!

    or pose for a Cleavage shot....... Lets face it-we are on a fitness site we ALL want to show off our progress
    ......so what was the topic again??? Oh yeah, pervs and running, right!

    Yep. People once again complaining about getting attention and then getting butt hurt when we point out the obvious.

    LOL too funny
  • MySlimGoals
    MySlimGoals Posts: 754 Member
    I've only ever had two rude reactions when I've been running - nothing that would really be worth putting me off altogether. One was from a man who yelled out 'Guess you have to start somewhere girl' - thought he would have been better keeping his mouth shut - that did not make me feel good when I had previously been in a good mood running down the road. The other was when I ran past a prison and got wolf whistled at! LOL. Most people ignore me out running and when I pass other runners I usually exchange smiles with them.
  • Silvervixen79
    Silvervixen79 Posts: 116 Member
    Here in the UK I dont get much attention when Im out running... but when I visit my family in Los Angeles I get loads of whistling and comments - because Mexican men seem to have a thing for my small waist and disproportionately large *kitten* combo LOL
  • Taking the piss is a British term meaning to take liberties at the expense of others, or to be unreasonable. It is often used (or confused) with taking the piss out of which is an expression meaning to mock, tease, ridicule, or scoff.[1] It is also not to be confused with "taking a piss", which refers to the actual biological act of urinating. Taking the Mickey (Mickey Bliss, Cockney rhyming slang) or taking the Michael is another term for making fun of someone. These terms are most widely used in the United Kingdom, Ireland, South Africa, New Zealand and Australia.
  • jessicae1aine
    jessicae1aine Posts: 885
    I am actually APPALLED at the number of people who think this situation is funny, or that a woman is asking for catcalls because she wears a close fitting top while running or because her boobs might bounce a bit, or that it is a compliment.

    It is not a compliment. Most of the time they are deliberately trying to make you uncomfortable or show off in front of their buddies. It's not big, it's not clever, and we definitely shouldn't have to accept it!

    If someone is calling out at you or whatever because you are a woman, and you are on your own it is quite intimidating. It's not funny at all. It's sexist *kitten* and by saying it's ok a lot of you are condoning it.

    I don't think anyone is condoning being disrespectful to women. And while you may find it offensive and degrading some women find it flattering. Others just find it funny, roll their eyes, and move on with their day.

    I've been cat called by a group of women before. They weren't at a construction site they were in a limo celebrating something I can only assume to be a bachelorette party. So it really does go both ways. This isn't a male vs. female thing.

    Also since you brought up entitlement what makes you the voice for all other women?

    Pretty much, I'm glad you agree she doesn't get to be the voice for all other women... because frankly, to use a word that was "offensive" but entirely true: this is ridiculous.

    Someone whistling at you doesn't make you a victim of anything.

    Someone shouting at you in a non-negative way isn't doing it to make you uncomfortable, that's absurd. (To show off to their friends, maybe.)

    Just because you're running, doesn't mean if someone acknowledges your existence you're about to get raped or assaulted or mugged or that that person even finds you attractive. Maybe they're just trying to be friendly. Maybe they're trying to be encouraging. Maybe any number of things - quit making every man a rapist or a pervert or any other word you want to use.

    It seems to me that all men are apparently guilty of both not understanding women and of objectifying women. Shame on all of you, you're all just terrible and horrible! :sad: But really, if you weren't paying any attention to us womenfolk, we'd be whining just as much. So, thanks! :drinker:
  • MizPassion
    MizPassion Posts: 245 Member
    Pervs will be pervs. You'll find pervs everywhere. I don't think there will be any law banning pervs from driving anytime soon.
  • FaerieCae
    FaerieCae Posts: 437 Member
    exactly what I reserve my middle finger for... ;) but in all seriousness I just find it funny that they're whistling etc when I'm hot and sweaty and completely NOT attractive :P
    I don't mean this to sound pervy, but it always baffles me when women talk about a time when they're "completely NOT attractive" as if this is a thing that exists.

    Aww thats sweet...
  • DonttrythatwithME
    DonttrythatwithME Posts: 214 Member
    Point 1...

    How hot are you?

    Point 2....

    I hear being chased by pervs is a great form of interval training,

    'Interval training is a favorite of pervs because of its effectiveness in cardiovascular build-up and also its ability to make more well-rounded runners and riders. However, it is also applicable to exercisers as it helps improve exercisers’ aerobic capacity to exercise longer at varying intensities' #BroScience
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
    If women need strange men howling at them from the street to find their strength then we need to educate women more.

    And I never said I was the voice for all women, I was merely empathising with the OP.

    And I didn't bring up entitlement, I brought up manners.

    I agree. If a woman 'needs' to be howled at from the street for confidence they may have some issues but to say that she 'needs' it is an assumption on your part. Some women are just very confident in there sexuality and understand that most of the time it's just harmless fun. Like I said, women do it as well. Search the forums. You'll find countless photos of men up with women doing this: :love:

    Is that objectification: Maybe.

    Is it evil or insulting? Not in my opinion.
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