The Science Behind "Nice" People

Options
24567…16

Replies

  • carriempls
    carriempls Posts: 326 Member
    Options
    What your "study" shows is it's better for everyone to be nice. Better for them (you've helped in some way) and better for you, as you're likely to get something in return, even it's just goodwill for the gesture.

    I don't see how you find this to be an argument for being a ****. Most people aren't intentionally nice to get things out of others. It's simply a happy side effect.

    I'm the kinda girl that assumes the best in people until they show me otherwise. This doesn't mean I'm a doormat. Common sense must prevail and if you're suspicious about someone, always use caution (I'm not buying any bridges). But I've tried the other way too. You get more flies from honey. And I'd rather think good things about people.
  • bluebird321
    bluebird321 Posts: 732 Member
    Options
    I think this is true to a point, but I also think things like "empathy" can play a part.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    Options
    This. Sure, taking care of each other helps society as a whole, providing a better environment for all of us (can you tell I'm not a republican)? But to say that's the ONLY reason someone would be nice is pretty narrow-focused and discounts all the other motivations driving people.
    George Price killed himself two years after this paper was published because he couldn't handle the fact that he scientifically eliminated the notion of "humanity."
    That's unfortunate. At one point, the world was "scientifically" flat and penicillin was a pesky mold that was ruining other "more important" scientific discoveries.
    I don't argue that the human being is largely motivated by survival, of the individual, the clan, and the species. But when survival isn't at risk, there's plenty of room for other motivations (I.e., Maslow).
  • cgarand
    cgarand Posts: 541 Member
    Options
    I'd say it's more correlated than proven.
    This. Sure, taking care of each other helps society as a whole, providing a better environment for all of us (can you tell I'm not a republican)? But to say that's the ONLY reason someone would be nice is pretty narrow-focused and discounts all the other motivations driving people.

    Leave it to some libtard to turn this into something political. Keep telling yourself that democrats are all about peace and love and that republicans are evil. This is just what you are meant to believe, this means that the propaganda mill is working! Then you don't think for yourself. It's better that way...
  • 126siany
    126siany Posts: 1,386 Member
    Options
    Even if you accept the premise that there are larger motives for "being nice", you've drawn the wrong conclusion.

    "Being nice" benefits the ENTIRE GROUP, not simply the person performing "nice behavior". If it didn't, we wouldn't continue as a social species.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    Options
    I'd say it's more correlated than proven.
    This. Sure, taking care of each other helps society as a whole, providing a better environment for all of us (can you tell I'm not a republican)? But to say that's the ONLY reason someone would be nice is pretty narrow-focused and discounts all the other motivations driving people.

    Leave it to some libtard to turn this into something political. Keep telling yourself that democrats are all about peace and love and that republicans are evil. This is just what you are meant to believe, this means that the propaganda mill is working! Then you don't think for yourself. It's better that way...
    Not a democrat, either. :-)
  • GorillaEsq
    GorillaEsq Posts: 2,198 Member
    Options
    Wow, that must be a very miserable world you live in where you a) will not trust anybody and b) you have to break down niceness into a equation that proves that everyone you meet is a self-serving pr*ck.
    A. Go read it again. You clearly missed the point.
    B. It's not my equation. It was published before I was born.
    I'd rather appreciate it when somebody's nice to me and accept, yes there are horrible people out there but it us up to me how I allow that to influence my view of the world. You give horrible people a LOT of power if you allow them make you so cynical.
    So, by your account, me basing my assessment of a person on their actions, rather than their words, makes me "cynical."
    Works for me.
  • LolasEpicJourney
    LolasEpicJourney Posts: 1,014 Member
    Options
    Maybe true for some but not for all!

    I'm nice because I treat people how I want to be treated. Because I was brought up to be nice and considerate.

    I don't expect to get anything from anyone except equal treatment
  • wild_wild_life
    wild_wild_life Posts: 1,334 Member
    Options
    This. Sure, taking care of each other helps society as a whole, providing a better environment for all of us (can you tell I'm not a republican)? But to say that's the ONLY reason someone would be nice is pretty narrow-focused and discounts all the other motivations driving people.
    George Price killed himself two years after this paper was published because he couldn't handle the fact that he scientifically eliminated the notion of "humanity."

    What exactly is the notion of "humanity"? Anyone who looks around for a bit would realize that humans are not perfect creatures whose every act is one of selfless compassion. I'm not quite sure why the idea of a biological basis of behavior is so disappointing.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    Options
    Wow, that must be a very miserable world you live in where you a) will not trust anybody and b) you have to break down niceness into a equation that proves that everyone you meet is a self-serving pr*ck.
    A. Go read it again. You clearly missed the point.
    B. It's not my equation. It was published before I was born.
    I'd rather appreciate it when somebody's nice to me and accept, yes there are horrible people out there but it us up to me how I allow that to influence my view of the world. You give horrible people a LOT of power if you allow them make you so cynical.
    So, by your account, me basing my assessment of a person on their actions, rather than their words, makes me "cynical."
    Works for me.
    But the points you've been making sound like you ARE judging people by their actions -- and that a nice action is inherently suspicious because it can only have self-serving motive behind it.
  • cgarand
    cgarand Posts: 541 Member
    Options
    I'd say it's more correlated than proven.
    This. Sure, taking care of each other helps society as a whole, providing a better environment for all of us (can you tell I'm not a republican)? But to say that's the ONLY reason someone would be nice is pretty narrow-focused and discounts all the other motivations driving people.

    I actually agree with you and I *am* a Republican. But ridiculous, unfounded mud slinging is always fun, right?

    LOL I am starting to think that ridiculous, unfounded mud slinging is part of the democrats platform...
  • SuperstarDJ
    SuperstarDJ Posts: 440 Member
    Options
    I volunteered on a suicide hotline for nearly 5 years (after surviving a few years of awful depression myself). I did it to give something to others who were suffering. When I helped people and they finished the call feeling more positive/more hopeful/even laughing, yes it did indeed make me feel great and it put a spring in my step. I still have cards and letters that callers had sent to me thanking me for helping them and some even say I saved their lives that day/night. When I'm having a bad day, I read those and they lift me so much.

    I don't know, but if that's "self-serving" then so be it.
  • Silverkittycat
    Silverkittycat Posts: 1,997 Member
    Options
    OP, you might find this series interesting -

    http://www.radiolab.org/2010/dec/14/

    http://www.radiolab.org/2010/dec/14/equation-good/
  • GorillaEsq
    GorillaEsq Posts: 2,198 Member
    Options
    "Being nice" benefits the ENTIRE GROUP, not simply the person performing "nice behavior". If it didn't, we wouldn't continue as a social species.
    Actually, that's more of Nash's theory, but you're headed in the right direction.
  • cgarand
    cgarand Posts: 541 Member
    Options
    I'd say it's more correlated than proven.
    This. Sure, taking care of each other helps society as a whole, providing a better environment for all of us (can you tell I'm not a republican)? But to say that's the ONLY reason someone would be nice is pretty narrow-focused and discounts all the other motivations driving people.

    Leave it to some libtard to turn this into something political. Keep telling yourself that democrats are all about peace and love and that republicans are evil. This is just what you are meant to believe, this means that the propaganda mill is working! Then you don't think for yourself. It's better that way...
    Not a democrat, either. :-)

    Then I guess you don't have that excuse for your narrow mind...
  • carriempls
    carriempls Posts: 326 Member
    Options
    I'm not quite sure why the idea of a biological basis of behavior is so disappointing.

    I don't get it either. :shrug:

    It's a shame Mr. Price found this to be so troubling (clearly he had some issues going on) but I don't understand how this is seen as a negative thing. It's simply an explanation. We do good to benefit everyone, including ourselves. So?
  • yodacho
    yodacho Posts: 90 Member
    Options
    Is anyone else reminded of Vizzini in "Princess Bride"?
  • GorillaEsq
    GorillaEsq Posts: 2,198 Member
    Options
    Maybe true for some but not for all!

    I'm nice because I treat people how I want to be treated. Because I was brought up to be nice and considerate.

    I don't expect to get anything from anyone except equal treatment
    Umm... I'm guessing you don't realize that you literally just proved the validity of the equation with your exact statement above.

    You're nice... because you want people to be nice to you, in return.

    I love epiphany moments.
  • wild_wild_life
    wild_wild_life Posts: 1,334 Member
    Options
    Wow, that must be a very miserable world you live in where you a) will not trust anybody and b) you have to break down niceness into a equation that proves that everyone you meet is a self-serving pr*ck.
    A. Go read it again. You clearly missed the point.
    B. It's not my equation. It was published before I was born.
    I'd rather appreciate it when somebody's nice to me and accept, yes there are horrible people out there but it us up to me how I allow that to influence my view of the world. You give horrible people a LOT of power if you allow them make you so cynical.
    So, by your account, me basing my assessment of a person on their actions, rather than their words, makes me "cynical."
    Works for me.
    But the points you've been making sound like you ARE judging people by their actions -- and that a nice action is inherently suspicious because it can only have self-serving motive behind it.

    I agree, in the OP he came off as implying that being less nice was somehow better because you aren't conforming to your genetically programmed ways. Of course there's always going to be a wide spectrum of variations on the niceness scale on an individual basis. I think he's just trying to get a response. Interesting discussion though.
  • Bentley2718
    Bentley2718 Posts: 1,690 Member
    Options
    While there is a lot of evidence that altruism does serve an adaptive purpose in both animals and humans (which has led to a debate about how altruistic altruism actually is) I think you've massively overstated the amount of evidence for, and the overall impact of, Price's work specifically. Price was not the first person to propose that altruistic behavior had a very real adaptive advantage, nor was he the last. Moreover, just because you can write down an equation about how you think two things are related, does not make it true. This type of model, or theorem is known to be overly reductionist, as Box and Draper wrote "remember that all models are wrong; the practical question is how wrong do they have to be to not be useful." Price's model undoubtedly provided food for thought, and may even be useful scientifically, but that does not make it absolutely true, or the final word on the subject of either altruism or humanity. Finally, I'd like to contest the use of the word "proven" used in the context of any scientific discussion, as "proof" is not the project of science, rather, the goal of science is to provide evidence against some explanations in order to provide indirect support for others.
This discussion has been closed.

Categories