Am I being unrealistic?

My boyfriend is 33 years old and in the obese range. He is 5'9'' and 230 pounds. He never works out. He showers about once a week. I never see him brush his teeth or floss. His toothbrush is yellow, no joke. He accidentally tipped over a can of soda in the guest room last night, didn't clean it up. I found it stuck to the carpet this morning. He never puts his dirty laundry in the hamper I bought for him. He has a custom large walk in closet and he leaves stuff all over the floor. We agreed that I can be in full time college if I clean the house; he pays the bills this year. He doesn't wear boxers and there is actually butt stain marks in his jeans. He will leave wrappers by the bed when there is a trash can less than a foot away. I know 'its my job' to clean everything but really?! Some days I want to scream. He shaves his pubic hairs in the shower, without the shower actually on, leaving a HUGE mess all over. He leaves his facial shavings all over the sink/counter in the bathroom. He is a chain smoker and wipes his crusty smoker lips on the bathroom towels... I dont know what to do. He smokes in his car but not the house. I wish he wouldn't smoke in the car, it looks like an ash tray but because I dont pay for it- 'I cant say anything.' Is it wrong of me to wish he would be a little cleaner? I am feeling used and its a huge turn off that he has become this messy.

I think he is depressed and needs to get help. I have tried being nice. I have tried giving him his space. I have invited him to workout with me... Nothing is working. He plays video games when he gets home from work or he works more in his office. We never get to 'connect' with eachother, we never really talk. I miss my best friend. I feel like I have been alone for over a year now.

He is VERY controlling of me. Everything is 'his' or mine. There is no, 'Ours'. He will go out and buy $500.00 worth of clothing for himself but I cannot get a haircut. I have actually started cutting my own hair. He says who I can hang out with and when. He doesn't like me having friends of any type really. I finally hung out with my friend whitney for the first time in 7 months. He actually told me he doesnt want me to get a job because he is afraid I will meet someone and leave him. He tracks my calls, texts and location from my phone. He has motion sensored- night vision cameras on the house that he says are for protection. There has been times I dont leave the house for 2 weeks at a time because I do my college online. I feel trapped. I am actually scared sometimes. What if I did leave and he hurts me? He told me what he did to his x wife when she left. . . He is an IT major and he sent naked pictures of his x wife to EVERYONE she works with. She was fired. He still enjoys harassing her. If he isnt going to be nice to me, I dont know what to do anymore.

I dont have parents and I was in the foster system growing up. I dont have siblings to help me out either. I have a small criminal record that I am getting 'expunged' right now. I dont do drugs, I actually can blood drug test clean. I literally cannot get a job. Walmart and mcdonalds wont hire me. The coffee shop 2 miles away will hire me for 2.80 an hour- no tips. I had a pocket knife that was to long in my purse- the police considered it "dangerous concealed weapon" and gave me a felony when I was 18 years old. I am just now getting this taken care of. Within 6 months I will be able to work, get a car, pay of debts and LIVE.