How young is too young?

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  • dovetail22uk
    dovetail22uk Posts: 339 Member
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    Dude, you eat live shrimp and still claim to know better!

    I don't eat sea food. Once again, you're clearly clueless about my culture

    4933745920
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    Ick factor...sorry. It's not the number of years between the two of you, but rather where you are both at in your lives. There's a HUGE difference from where one is at when they're 17 vs. 29. HUGE.

    Plus, people might start comparing you to this guy:

    Courntey-Stodden-Doug-Hutchison1-435x580.jpg

    Did you just compared a matured, knowledgeable woman of 17 years old to some ditsy blonde who's making a duck face? What is wrong with ...?
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
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    After 12 they get expensive.
  • mitasakii
    mitasakii Posts: 3 Member
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    And lets face it. You wouldn't have posted this if you didn't think at the back of your mind you were doing something wrong.
  • elyelyse
    elyelyse Posts: 1,454 Member
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    as a girl who used to hook up with older guys when I was 17... I look back now and see them as total creepers.

    Maybe that isn't the case with you and you really wanna take her out for dinner and a movie and get to know her and maybe develop a long-term relationship. If so keep this in mind: most girls that age who want to be with an older man... it's typically about rebellion, doing things mom and dad will hate, and feeling more grown up than they really are.
  • LaserMum
    LaserMum Posts: 133
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    I was 18 when I married a 29 year old. We did genuinely love each other. But I was too inexperienced/naive/immature and the marriage lasted less than 2 years. We kept in touch from a distance and, in later years, developed a friendship. He passed away in 2000 and he will always hold a special place in my heart.

    I regret my first marriage because it hurt someone who I loved because of my immaturity. And it hurt me too. No blame exists but two lovely people were both hurt.

    It is your (and her) choice. If you go for it, take it slow. Wait for her to mature. If you really connect that well with her, the waiting will be worth it.

    Good luck to both of you.
  • twelfty
    twelfty Posts: 576 Member
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    going by your pics you're from india? i think given the current movement for fairer treatment of women in your country after a woman had her insides removed with a scaffold pole after being raped by 6 men, you might want to have a look at what values you're holding to lol...
    sometimes cultures need to change.

    agreed
    including our own.

    the recent news in america, with more sympathy for rapist jocks than for their victim, would illustrate the point. marital rape was legal in the uk right up until 1991. i don't think there's a culture on the planet that shouldn't be striving to improve.

    I very much agree with this. A friend of mine showed me all these Twitter posts and FB posts by people, actually blaming the girl for the rape, that she was a "slut" and "why was she drinking in the first place." Yeah, because you should be punished for making a stupid choice by way of rape. Even worse was those females who got arrested for harassing and threatening her. Disgusting.
    and how impressive it is that we can post our disgust without being accused of being anti american.

    if you love your country and your culture then you want it to be the best it can be, and admitting it's flaws is part of that.

    1991 would be 22 years ago... alot changes in nearly a quarter of a century lol

    while again in india where forced marriages and rape is completely legal i fail to see where the counter arguement is, i don't know what idiots on facebook holds as a countries values but where i'm from in the UK off of the internet a rapist is not defended unless in a court of law because he has to be and victims are most definately not vilified in any way shape or form

    I don't understand why you keep bringing India into this conversation? Did your British empire not rape and pillage them enough that you feel the need to finish the job?

    ... no i'm expressing my opinion of the things that go on there, i didn't have anything to do with the british empire? i don't reallllly think i'm disallowed an opinion because of something that happened 400 years ago
  • CrystalRenee2013
    CrystalRenee2013 Posts: 25 Member
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    If I was you i'd give it a try. Just don't be intimate with her until she is 18!! You never know she might be just what your looking for :happy:
  • bluefox9er
    bluefox9er Posts: 2,917 Member
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    OP, why dont you just go to Thailand? It's quiet common to see pervy european men with teenagers dangling off their arms and seems to be socially acceptable there...
  • rabies
    rabies Posts: 62
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    Dude, you eat live shrimp and still claim to know better!

    I don't eat sea food. Once again, you're clearly clueless about my culture

    You're trying to take advantage of the "ancient asian culture" thing, when we all know that most of asia was a swamp where the highest level of intellect barely managed to figure out what end of the pointy stick to poke the frogs with. So I'm going to treat you as an average asian, which eats sea food, including live baby shrimp. And pig-face.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    I don't see why you can't date her. Of course, if she lives with mom and dad, I would have to make certain it was okay with them first. It will just go better for you if they approve. And... if I were you, I wouldn't get too physical until she was 18. Otherwise, I don't see why you can't date her, as long as you are respectful to her and her parents. Be an upstanding guy about it. If you have a real connection with her, then it's worth it.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
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    I'm from Asia. We have a strict policy of old enough to bleed, old enough to breed

    You realize that here in North America in some cases that means 8 years old?

    That's like promoting pedophielia.

    Well, we don't drink and eat food filled with artificial hormones. Girls here typically have their periods around 13+ years.

    ^ Says that like 13 years old is ok...

    0319edf5-ea69-4ff3-9959-d919d4937e6b_zpsea49d162.jpg

    I thought you knew about my culture *cough* BS *cough*

    13 is NOT ok in the UK, the US, or 95% of all other countries. You need to take your own advice and learn about cultures other than your own.

    Good thing I am not talking about the other countries, am I? And I thought you knew what my culture is?

    she does she's saying it's not ok for a 13 year old to have sex....

    Thanks but the Asian cultures are much more Ancient than some 300 years old country so I think we know better. I love how in your culture a girl is magically of age when she turns 18. One day she's this innocent child and the next day, she's a woman who can do whatever she wants.

    You seem to be persistently missing the point over and over again despite how many people point it out to you.

    It's seemingly weird to you that a woman 'magically' turns into an adult when she hits 18, but not so weird that a girl 'magically' turns into an adult the second she starts bleeding.

    And seeing as you are obviously so unique and follow this ancient culture that no-one would possibly know anything about, why don't you inform us poor uneducated souls as to what that is rather than being so secretive about it?

    I would also like to point out, if you really do follow a 300 year old culture, that explains a lot as to why you think it's acceptable to have sex with children. Your culture needs updating.
  • Kat5343
    Kat5343 Posts: 451 Member
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    OP has come here looking for justification.
    The fact that he feels he needs justification is enough of a flag to say this is the wrong thing.

    OP
    You're too old. She's too young. There is not justification for the relationship you want. It's inappropriate and just plain dumb.

    Put your thinking head back in your pants and grow up enough to find a woman to date.



    OMG..^^^^ THIS!!!! You are awesome!!
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    Shes pretty much an adult. If your both happy go for it. Age don't mean jack.


    Thank you.

    THis is what I was thinking.

    I mean when she's 30 and I'm 45 is it really going to matter?

    It won't be so bad in 10 years time no.
    How 17 is she? I mean, has she recently turned 17 or is she nearer to 18?
    You've got to think though that she's still quite young. When you're 32 she'll be 20. Will she want the same things as you? Or will she be regretting giving up her young adult life to have a relationship with an older man.
    If she's mature for her age and doesn't care about going out on the tiles all the time with her friends and she is looking for a long term relationship that could lead to something more, then go for it. But if she's not, then maybe you should side step this one and go for someone a little bit older, that you will still have loads in common with, but you have the same long term relationship goals.

    Hope that made sense

    Thank you!

    She is a very mature 17 and I would consider myself an immature 29.

    I really DID feel a connection with this girl which is why it's so hard to just "side step" it at this point. She's everything I'm looking for. She's gorgeous, charming, charismatic, and I think that if alot of the people on this forum giving me a hard time were to meet her they wouldn't have a problem with me seeing her.
  • chetnabhatt
    chetnabhatt Posts: 77
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    And Taunto, before you say it, I DO know about your culture, and I am entitled to an opinion just as much as you are.

    I have noticed you posting controversial posts in an attempt to get a rise out of people many times on here, and now that you have, you don't seem to like it. In all honesty, what did you expect people's reactions to be to your post? You have to understand our way of living just as much as you expect us to understand yours.

    Where am I from. Please tell me and also tell me how you know my culture and how does that entitle you to an opinion?

    Ohh Taunto...if not from India you're either from Pakistan or Bangladesh eating "chaney ki daal, kadhai chicken, igloo ice-cream, roti ,indian tandoori naan,pakodas,keema,dosa,poori,indianchicken biryani,kofta,kadhi,bombay club rabri,bihari kabab" and having 'indian chai' in your diary. "Eat outs at Gopal's, Indian Take aways,Ghasitaram's cham cham arhar daal, laal wali daal,halwa"...you kidding..?? Who other that Indians or pakistanis know hindi that well not even bangladeshis.
  • Leeanne1974
    Leeanne1974 Posts: 207 Member
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    Sorry has the Ick Ick ICKKKK factor for me.

    I cannot see how a man who is approaching 30 could have anything in common with a 17 year old. She could still be in school.
    I take it you have no children of your own because if you did you would understand why some of us have had a little bit of sick appearing in our mouths reading your posts.
    I am in the UK and have dated younger men but NOT men who (I feel) are still children. That is verging on "nonse" in my book.
    Hopefully she has a big stong dad who doesn't take kindly to (supposedly) older and so called mature men trying it on with his daughter...
    If a 29 year old woman tried it on with my 17 year old son (my Son is 17, this isn't hypothetical), I would kick her *kitten* into next week.
  • rabies
    rabies Posts: 62
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    And Taunto, before you say it, I DO know about your culture, and I am entitled to an opinion just as much as you are.

    I have noticed you posting controversial posts in an attempt to get a rise out of people many times on here, and now that you have, you don't seem to like it. In all honesty, what did you expect people's reactions to be to your post? You have to understand our way of living just as much as you expect us to understand yours.

    Where am I from. Please tell me and also tell me how you know my culture and how does that entitle you to an opinion?

    Ohh Taunto...if not from India you're either from Pakistan or Bangladesh eating "chaney ki daal, kadhai chicken, igloo ice-cream, roti ,indian tandoori naan,pakodas,keema,dosa,poori,indianchicken biryani,kofta,kadhi,bombay club rabri,bihari kabab" and having 'indian chai' in your diary. "Eat outs at Gopal's, Indian Take aways,Ghasitaram's cham cham arhar daal, laal wali daal,halwa"...you kidding..?? Who other that Indians or pakistanis know hindi that well not even bangladeshis.

    Pakistan and Bangladesh is totally India.
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
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    I'm from Asia.

    Just casually perusing through your posts on this thread. Where exactly in Asia do you live? Or maybe you already said it and I just missed it.


    I'm going to say he is from one of the Asian countries. Not Africa or Europe. But this is an assumption.


    I-See-What-You-Did-There..png

    im%20watching%20you%20-%20copia.jpg

    access denied on the second pic :cry: :ohwell:
  • So_Much_Fab
    So_Much_Fab Posts: 1,146 Member
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    Courntey-Stodden-Doug-Hutchison1-435x580.jpg
    Did you just compared a matured, knowledgeable woman of 17 years old to some ditsy blonde who's making a duck face? What is wrong with ...?

    She's 18, and obviously very mature (and talented). *snickers*
  • LoveCR22
    LoveCR22 Posts: 75 Member
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    My son is almost 17 and if he was dating a 29 yr old his butt would be grounded until he was 21.
    Most of the time he still needs to be told to take his dogs out for a pee he isn't mature enough at 17 to have an "adult" relationship and going by all the teenage girls I have to deal with by having two teenage sons most 16/17 and even 18 yr old girls don't have the maturity level to have a real relationship a 29 year old man.

    Seriously I'm only 4 years older than you and dealing with teenagers daily isn't fun :grumble:

    Plus if you really felt she was old enough to be with you wouldn't have asked this question in the first place.

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