DEAL BREAKERS for dating

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  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
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    1. Attractive
    2. Willing to sleep with me

    1 is negotiable

    My dealbreakers:

    Illiteracy
  • peachfigs
    peachfigs Posts: 831 Member
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    1. No ambition
    2. Jealousy and not allowing you to have your own friends
    3. Being clingy
    4. Men who think that being single is awful and they simply MUST be in a relationship to be happy
  • MM_1982
    MM_1982 Posts: 374
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    For the women who don't like poor spelling, why does this matter in the slightest? I can see that if someone who completely butchers the English language you might be able to call their intelligence in to question but if the poor guy spells definitely definately by accident how does this make him a poor candidate to date?
    women are picky by nature...men just want to bang.

    DING DING. We have a winner.

    Men usually just want to smash and bail, which is why they don't have any initial dealbreakers.

    However, if a guy is looking for a serious relationship, their 'must haves' and 'deal breakers' list will be just as long as most women's list. The man's list will mostly be physical things though (weight, cute face, etc).
  • verdancyhime
    verdancyhime Posts: 237 Member
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    Must have a job, needn't be a "career." Needn't even be a "job" if you're disabled or whatever. I am not paying your rent.

    Must have lived on your own or with room mates at some point before living with me so I know you do in fact know how to do your own laundry and put dirty dishes in the sink occasionally

    Must reciprocate oral sex

    Do not make me feel like a housewife rather than an important part of your life- In other words, you still need to act like I'm special when we haven't had a fight recently even after the honeymoon phase is over

    No picky eaters
    No militant idealists of any sort
    No cheaters
    No liars
    No gaslighting, ever
    No Lady Gaga
    If you are a girl, be out of the closet
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member
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    1. Attractive
    2. Willing to sleep with me

    1 is negotiable


    How YOU doin'??? :love:
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    The slightest hint of sexism, racism, homophobia, or anything similar is not okay with me ever. One single "women in the kitchen" or rape joke will make me lose every ounce of interest in a person.

    Some people can find the "slightest hint" in pretty much anything.

    But you did make me think of a big deal breaker for me...lack of a sense of humor.
    Oh, and has to promise not to tell my wife.
  • eric_sg61
    eric_sg61 Posts: 2,925 Member
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    To sum up this thread..

    must haves for women:
    must be between 180lb - 195lbs
    must be taller than 6'2
    graduate degree
    150k year income
    above average facial aesthetics
    charming
    well traveled
    + 1 million other trivial things

    must haves for men:
    cannot have a penis

    Am I close?
    Yup. Women have high standards. And they wonder why they are constanly disappointed.
    My standards are like Henry Rollins
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLWwtp7rUYA
  • wikitbikit
    wikitbikit Posts: 518 Member
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    For the women who don't like poor spelling, why does this matter in the slightest? I can see that if someone who completely butchers the English language you might be able to call their intelligence in to question but if the poor guy spells definitely definately by accident how does this make him a poor candidate to date?
    I don't know, but I originally came in contact with my (now ex) husband online, and in one of our chats (long before we met) I typed the word 'independant' [sic]. I don't remember the exact context, but it was a fairly long message with some thought involved that I'm sure my then 25ish year old self thought was very important. ANYWAY. My NEH replied to this deep and meaningful message with a succinct 'independent' and logged off.

    Man, if only HE had had that as a deal breaker...
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
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    Ha no car one just ruled out half the men in Amsterdam, and no pot ruled the rest. I feel bad for the men of Amsterdam for going green was their undoing.
  • mistressfaye
    mistressfaye Posts: 232 Member
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    In no particular order: (luckily I found and married someone who fit all my criteria and more and do not have to date anymore)

    1. Doesn't love/appreciate Eddie Izzard (doesn't have to be on the same level I do, but somewhere in the ballpark)
    2. Hates Cats
    3. Would insist on having a dog
    4. Atheists
    5. Doesn't live a lifestyle that would be appropriate for membership on fetlife
    6. Doesn't love to read books
    7. Doesn't enjoy some kind of sci fi geekdom (Doesn't have to enjoy the same shows, but understands my love of the genre)
    8. Won't wear a kilt
    9. Thinks a relationship is 50/50 (its 100/100)
    10. Doesn't appreciate the better chick flicks
    11. Homophobic
    12. Laughs at Barry Manilow
    13. Can't cook (doesn't have to be a michelin star chef, but needs to be able to do something other than microwave food)
    14. Doesn't do laundry
  • CollegiateGrief
    CollegiateGrief Posts: 552 Member
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    For the women who don't like poor spelling, why does this matter in the slightest? I can see that if someone who completely butchers the English language you might be able to call their intelligence in to question but if the poor guy spells definitely definately by accident how does this make him a poor candidate to date?
    women are picky by nature...men just want to bang.

    DING DING. We have a winner.

    Men usually just want to smash and bail, which is why they don't have any initial dealbreakers.

    However, if a guy is looking for a serious relationship, their 'must haves' and 'deal breakers' list will be just as long as most women's list. The man's list will mostly be physical things though (weight, cute face, etc).

    Ugh. Let's add shallowness. Attraction is important, but if you're willing to nail anything that stays still long enough, and then demand Victoria's Secret model perfection in a long term relationship, which you will deem more important than any actual meaningful trait, you just suck as a human. As much as girls who are gold diggers.
  • iulia_maddie
    iulia_maddie Posts: 2,780 Member
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    It's more accurate to say women are picky about bull**** by nature. You seem them consistantly bend their standards on huge issues which should be real deal breakers but instead focus their rage on nonsense like whether a guy can't spell or if he chews to loudly.
    What did she do to you man?
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
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    4) being hot and cold (commitment phobes who don't want me to go)

    Damn! I'm a commitaphobe. Or at least, with one failed marriage behind me already, I have to ward off my never married, this is his first serious, live-in relationship boyfriend from the "marriage and baby" talks.
    Being a commitmentphobe doesn't bother me. Take it from a 2-time engagement breaker. Everyone has their comfort levels, and I don't expect anyone to know they will be uncomfortable with mine until they get to know me. But when I want to leave, suddenly they turn into Barbie's Dream Boyfriend. I'm showered with expensive dinners, flowers, gifts, constant desire to spend time. It's too much for both of us, and then their heads explode...both of 'em.
  • mrstravisjones
    mrstravisjones Posts: 104 Member
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    Dealbreakers:

    1. Not being a practicing Christian
    2. Infidelity
    3. Smoking and drugs
    3. Refusing to belt out to Broadway music with me
  • SteelersFan7
    SteelersFan7 Posts: 217 Member
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    Mostly I like scars and lisps... and sometimes a limp.

    And the guy can't be better at bj's than I am.
  • WinnerVictorious
    WinnerVictorious Posts: 4,735 Member
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    For the women who don't like poor spelling, why does this matter in the slightest? I can see that if someone who completely butchers the English language you might be able to call their intelligence in to question but if the poor guy spells definitely definately by accident how does this make him a poor candidate to date?
    women are picky by nature...men just want to bang.

    DING DING. We have a winner.

    Men usually just want to smash and bail, which is why they don't have any initial dealbreakers.

    However, if a guy is looking for a serious relationship, their 'must haves' and 'deal breakers' list will be just as long as most women's list. The man's list will mostly be physical things though (weight, cute face, etc).

    nonsense.

    if you're 17 years old, maybe... but at 17 you're still a child.

    grown men are not this shallow, unless they are douchenozzles.
  • StheK
    StheK Posts: 443 Member
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    2. Atheist - Not that she HAS to be the same religion as me - I just don't want someone so arrogant as to assume that they know without a doubt that there is absolutely no chance that there is anything beyond the world we can observe. A person who believes that would probably have an extremely difficult time committing to a highly complex emotion like love, which is not scientifically explainable. (unlike lust / attraction, which is very easily explained through science).

    4. Feminazi - Totally fine with feminism (ie: the recognition of the fact that women are EQUAL to men), just not femiNAZIism (the ridiculous assertion that women are THE SAME AS men).
    You are so misguided about atheism and feminism that it's embarrassing to even read this.

    Hear, hear!
  • WinnerVictorious
    WinnerVictorious Posts: 4,735 Member
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    For the women who don't like poor spelling, why does this matter in the slightest? I can see that if someone who completely butchers the English language you might be able to call their intelligence in to question but if the poor guy spells definitely definately by accident how does this make him a poor candidate to date?
    women are picky by nature...men just want to bang.

    It's more accurate to say women are picky about bull**** by nature. You seem them consistantly bend their standards on huge issues which should be real deal breakers but instead focus their rage on nonsense like whether a guy can't spell or if he chews to loudly.

    instead of blaming all women everywhere for your dating failures, maybe you should take a good hard look at yourself in the mirror.

    everybody gets their hearts broken at one time or another. get over it. it's part of life.
  • wikitbikit
    wikitbikit Posts: 518 Member
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    I just don't like mean people. Anything else can probably be dealt with, but if you're mean? Go inflict it on someone else.

    edit: But I have zero interest in dating. Like, if you offered me an all expense paid date or a root canal that I had to pay for (and I don't even need one), I'm not entirely sure which I would choose. And I hate going to the dentist.
  • ChrisinGA
    ChrisinGA Posts: 116 Member
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    read the first 3 pages then skipped to 7 so didn't read them all but after just reading just those I sure am glad Im not single and here for a date WOW some of you are WAY to picky...

    I like the guy who said you must have a pulse, I guess that is me also Ha ha No not really for me

    No Smokers---- can't stand it

    No lazy people - if you can't pick up your own trash,cloths,ect at home then go on, im not going to be ur houseman

    Cleanses --- Take a shower and smell good Don't want to be with a bum

    NO jail- if you been in jail there was a reason i do not hang out with "bad" people

    no drugs- I don't do them and don't want you to.

    Drinking- every once in a while is cool but not every week

    No crazy holy people- I believe in God but If you want me to go to church with you sorry, its not me, I have try to date someone like that it did not work

    No travel- I like going places every few ys but hardly go places, if you want to see the world I'm not your guy

    These are ones that can go either way for me and not sure agree with them

    Car- Its nice if they have one but I think out of the 10 girls I have dated only 3 had there own cars, I guess Older you get the more important that is

    Not living in your own place---- I really don't get this I mean if you hit it off and the male and female both own there own home, who is going to sell theirs? I admit I lived at home longer then I should have but I also helped my parents out never understood why this bothered girls so much.


    No Job---- I won't look down on you if you do not have a job the economy stinks right now has for a few yrs, but I hope yours trying to get a job or have something on the side, I have always until recently made money on the side, today seems can't make money doing anything

    Guess I have more then I thought after thinking about it a lil while ha ha but don't think any of mine are crazy

    You guys/gals made me really LOL on some of them thanks for the laughs

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