another fat shaming post

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Replies

  • silvergurl518
    silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
    Personally, when I congratulate someone on their progress, I'm not saying "wow you were fat and disgusting before and now you're skinny and pretty". I'm really saying "you've worked your *kitten* off to achieve a goal and you are doing it / have done it, excellent job". That's the difference.

    ^ this. also, even if someone may have "looked fine" BEFORE by whatever standards one uses to measure these things, usually that person feels more confident and in charge of his/her life in the DURING and AFTER stages of one's sometimes lengthy "transformation/journey/yadda yadda."
  • lesliesmmmacres
    lesliesmmmacres Posts: 40
    I think progress pictures are the BEST way to help keep you accountable - "look what I have accomplished"... and we all know there are days when we just DON'T want to get in gear...so you can review where you have been, how far you've come, and get motivated to get off your rear-end and work it, baby!!! I love to see the progress pictures people share....it really helps me motivate!!!
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    not fat shaming as i have a hard time looking at myself and realizing I have lost 151 where as i can look at my before pic at 409lbs to my progress of 258lbs.and actually see it. I really have trouble seeing myself smaller, in my mind's eye i still see myself way heavier but the pictures of the weight loss helps me keep thing in perspective

    WAY TO GO! That's amazing!!
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
    If given the option for an easy-pick, there is NO ONE who would choose an overweight version of themselves. I would bet that the author of the post was dealing with cognitive dissonance by rationalizing her lack of ultimate success at losing weight. There's a difference between being disgusted with yourself and being dissatisfied enough to get up and do something about it. It's unhealthy and uncomfortable, and we all know it. There's no reason to pretend we feel any differently about it.
  • ShifuYaku
    ShifuYaku Posts: 504 Member
    I think it's good because the way that I feel, we are not happy with the way we are now, otherwise we wouldn't be doing anything to change it if we liked how we are. I love seeing motivating pictures like progress because I am just not so sure I would look like skinny girls ever because of how I look now. Being able to see that even people who used to be 100 pounds heavier are now amazing and toned and smaller gives me hope that I can too look like that. :)
  • squatsandlipgloss
    squatsandlipgloss Posts: 595 Member
    I just see befores and afters as "they used to feel unhealthy and lacked energy" and "now they feel healthy and have a lot of energy".

    I do however cannot stand it when people (especially on Tumblr. I see this) say that in their before picture they look fat and ugly - this is fat shaming to me. Even if they say it about themselves, they would say it about someone else also (that looks the same). They would be losing weight for the wrong reasons.
  • squatsandlipgloss
    squatsandlipgloss Posts: 595 Member
    If given the option for an easy-pick, there is NO ONE who would choose an overweight version of themselves . I would bet that the author of the post was dealing with cognitive dissonance by rationalizing her lack of ultimate success at losing weight. There's a difference between being disgusted with yourself and being dissatisfied enough to get up and do something about it. It's unhealthy and uncomfortable, and we all know it. There's no reason to pretend we feel any differently about it.

    Can I call b.s.? I am sure there are people that would rather be "overweight" (let's say by BMI standards) than lose the weight. As long as they are (and feel) healthy, their weight really doesn't matter. My goal weight/body will be "overweight" (by BMI standards) and I much prefer that over losing even more weight the be "normal" (by BMI standards).
  • IsobellaGeneva
    IsobellaGeneva Posts: 13
    Motivating. Shows me what other people can do, and if they can do it, so can I.



    Exactly. Seeing progress pictures is what motivated me in the first place to begin working to lose fat and get fit ( despite my current problem of binging/ overeating) since it obviously is possible. Also, the people in the pictures are much happier being lighter and fitter and , in most cases, have put their photos out there in order to help motivate others to know that great results are possible for them too.
  • luckyshilling
    luckyshilling Posts: 229
    I don't think it's fat shaming at all. I actually just posted my progress picture of what I've accomplished so far. People use it for motivation to see what others can accomplish, as well as what they themselves have accomplished. That's like saying posting times from two different runs, where you do better in the second, is a form of jog shaming. It's progress, not an insult.

    Jog Shaming shall be the next internet craze. Now look what you started!:wink:
  • Sunny_fit4life
    Sunny_fit4life Posts: 157 Member
    I find getting fit to be part of *loving* myself "the way I am". I care for myself, therefore I want to take care OF myself.

    I find the notion that I value myself less because I want to lose weight to be offensive.
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
    If given the option for an easy-pick, there is NO ONE who would choose an overweight version of themselves . I would bet that the author of the post was dealing with cognitive dissonance by rationalizing her lack of ultimate success at losing weight. There's a difference between being disgusted with yourself and being dissatisfied enough to get up and do something about it. It's unhealthy and uncomfortable, and we all know it. There's no reason to pretend we feel any differently about it.

    Can I call b.s.? I am sure there are people that would rather be "overweight" (let's say by BMI standards) than lose the weight. As long as they are (and feel) healthy, their weight really doesn't matter. My goal weight/body will be "overweight" (by BMI standards) and I much prefer that over losing even more weight the be "normal" (by BMI standards).
    No, you may not call BS. You may call a difference of opinion.
  • sassafrascas
    sassafrascas Posts: 191 Member
    I have been on both sides of this debate, I used to look at other peoples progress and success and get real depressed and hate myself because obviously they were better than me because they had accomplished so much. One day my attitude changed and I was able to be encouraged and mildly motivated by it, now I love the success stories thread. So it depends on the person. But I had to learn to love myself right where I am. Maybe I will love myself more when I am thin but I love me right now too.
  • baileybiddles
    baileybiddles Posts: 457 Member
    Well, honestly, I don't think that it's fat shaming at all. I think it's motivational.

    We shouldn't become fat one way or the other, we should be healthy. Every single person is equipped with the tools to be a healthy, thinner individual. It's all about the choices we make. Is fat gross? I mean, yeah, it certainly can be. I'm not ashamed to admit that I feel that way. When I see myself in pictures right now I am grossed out by the shape of my body. It motivates me to not have to see that anymore.
  • FrnkLft
    FrnkLft Posts: 1,821 Member
    (my computer crashed the first time I typed this out, so hopefully it wont this time)

    Do you consider progress pics and before and after shots a form of fat shaming? I read a blog post about it on tumblr where the author was a heavy woman who hates the idea that the fat version of someone is not good enough for everybody. Most of the comments that agreed were from heavier people who say we should love ourselves no matter what size we are and that getting thin is a way to keep women weak and helpless (lol at weak and helpless). Another comment stated that she stopped posting progress pics because the best progress is what you cannot see. Do you agree?

    Do you think it's a form of fat shaming or do you think it's motivating?
    Why do you post or dont post progress pictures?

    Look, there are certain realities in life right? I am actually attracted to thick women, but just straight being overweight and not doing anything about it is NOT ok. Expecting others to change what they find attractive (plutonically or sexually) because you just want to be seen that way is bull**** and stupid.

    For instance, unlike being fat, I'm short and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. It's true that it bothers me here and there when I think about it too much, but I don't expect women to find me more attractive if and when they don't. I understand that height is attractive to most women, and the truth is I have opinions about height myself. It's normal, natural, nothing wrong with it even if it is unfortunate for me.

    I avoid feeling bad about it, I don't take **** from anyone about it, and I do what I can otherwise. It's also not correlated to health by the way...

    So, should the fat person should feel bad about it? NO. Should they just accept it? NO because they CAN improve.

    I don't see before and after photos as being fat shaming... I think anyone who does is over thinking things or just feeling sorry for themselves.

    Don't feel bad about it, don't take **** from others, but don't accept it.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    I really just wish people would stop projecting their own psychological issues onto everyone else. If you think being obese is some symbol of female empowerment, that's your problem. Don't tell me that by losing 100 lbs, I'm perpetuating the notion that women are weak and helpless. That's a crock of ****.
  • ChristyRunStarr
    ChristyRunStarr Posts: 1,600 Member
    I read a blog post about it on tumblr where the author was a heavy woman who hates the idea that the fat version of someone is not good enough for everybody.
    I didn't post mine or decide to change for anyone but MYSELF. I wasn't good enough for me-in my mind at least. So, I decided to better myself
    Why do you post or dont post progress pictures?
    Again, I post them for me. I enjoy seeing where I was and where I am now-it helps on those days when I'm wondering why I even bother. And I guess it's the same for others-it's nice to see how others have done it so I figure I'll return the favor
  • FrnkLft
    FrnkLft Posts: 1,821 Member
    I really just wish people would stop projecting their own psychological issues onto everyone else. If you think being obese is some symbol of female empowerment, that's your problem. Don't tell me that by losing 100 lbs, I'm perpetuating the notion that women are weak and helpless. That's a crock of ****.

    Marry me. lol
  • rubberbiscuit
    rubberbiscuit Posts: 128
    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Eleanor Roosevelt

    If these people are feeling shamed by someone elses accomplishments, that's on them. Personally, I love looking at progress pics and reading peoples stories, there's a lot of people out there who are inspiring.
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
    I think shame is an incredibly powerful mountain that many of us battle daily, and it doesn't need any outside help. I believe, outside of our parents, and our closest intimate relationships, no one truly has the power to shame us. Unless we willingly give them that power. Note that does not trivialize the widespread problem of shame, nor diminish my first statement. I simply think the way to effectively address shame is inwardly focused.

    For some, posting a "fat pic" by the refrigerator is motivation. For others it is shaming. Before and after pics seem to celebrate success whenever I see them. But it all depends on the individual and their relationship with shame. I think measurements and numbers matter for some people, but most of us respond to visual information and pictures showing progress have a greater effect on most people.
  • jmjones2002
    jmjones2002 Posts: 47
    I have only lost 11lbs so no real progress pics to show but I've been overweight for 17yrs now. I personally love to see progress pics. When I'm feeling defeated & thinking I shouldn't even try bc it's not coming off as fast as I want I look at pics & think if they can do it surely I can!! It's inspriring to me especially when they were around the same weight as me.
  • thatsillyshana
    thatsillyshana Posts: 141
    I like it when you all get angry/aggressive. :wink:
    Anyways, if anyone sees this one, how do you feel about the fake before and after pics on tv?
  • tedrickp
    tedrickp Posts: 1,229 Member
    Wow. People can be offended by anything....

    Haha this! I can't believe the things people waste the energy being offended about.

    I legitimately think the idea of progress pics being fat shaming is one of the more outrageous things I have heard.

    For me personally I find the succes stories forums the best motivation out there. I peruse it everyday and I consider it a huge help for me.

    The blog post complaining about progress pics is so weird. Posting progress pics isn't about making a point about society - it is all about personal triumph. How can that be a bad thing?

    I also don't think people saying "Omg i was so gross in the first photo" is fat shaming either. If someone personally finds something wrong with themselves - whether it is appearance, knowledge or attitude - then they have all the right in the world to feel that way. If they manage to address that issue and progress to somewhere that makes them personally happier and fulfilled...go for it.

    As I write this I am getting more annoyed at the thought a progress pic can be "fat shaming".

    I think that blog post is "Success Shaming".
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
    For instance, unlike being fat, I'm short and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. It's true that it bothers me here and there when I think about it too much, but I don't expect women to find me more attractive if and when they don't. I understand that height is attractive to most women, and the truth is I have opinions about height myself. It's normal, natural, nothing wrong with it even if it is unfortunate for me.
    You better not go to an NBA game. That's, like, a national hate group dedicated to short-shaming.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    People being proud of reaching personal goals isn't shaming -- sharing the stories is inspiriting to others with similar goals. If you don't have similar goals - s'ok, just don't look. Don't assume that "before" means "bad".
  • Kat5343
    Kat5343 Posts: 451 Member
    I personally love seeing the progress others have made and it motivates me even more. Especially when I see women around my age who had about the same amount of weight to lose.
  • GracefulDancer4Christ
    GracefulDancer4Christ Posts: 419 Member
    I don't feel showing my progress pictures before and after would be fat shaming. I find it shows me how far I have come and keeps me motivated to finish what I start. I would have to disagree with the author who feels this way.
  • baileybiddles
    baileybiddles Posts: 457 Member
    I personally love seeing the progress others have made and it motivates me even more. Especially when I see women around my age who had about the same amount of weight to lose.

    Yes. This. Seeing women in their early twenties or late teens losing the same amount of weight that I need to lose is HUGELY motivating. It puts it within reach.
  • ElyseL1
    ElyseL1 Posts: 504 Member
    Motivating for sure. I'm all for people loving themselves no matter how heavy or slim they are. We are all great in our own ways, but I think I rock life better at a lower weight, than I did 47 lbs ago. I suddenly have more energy (big shock lol) and am much happier in general with my life. Before and after pictures are a way to celebrate my accomplishments. And I'm abt as far as you can get from a weak woman. Bring it on world.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
    Uhm maybe someone already said this.

    If so I apologise.

    Being fat ISN'T good.

    It's bad.

    Nobody aspires to be fat.
  • AliciaStinger
    AliciaStinger Posts: 402 Member
    (my computer crashed the first time I typed this out, so hopefully it wont this time)

    Do you consider progress pics and before and after shots a form of fat shaming? I read a blog post about it on tumblr where the author was a heavy woman who hates the idea that the fat version of someone is not good enough for everybody. Most of the comments that agreed were from heavier people who say we should love ourselves no matter what size we are and that getting thin is a way to keep women weak and helpless (lol at weak and helpless). Another comment stated that she stopped posting progress pics because the best progress is what you cannot see. Do you agree?

    Do you think it's a form of fat shaming or do you think it's motivating?
    Why do you post or dont post progress pictures?

    I don't post progress pictures because I don't have a way or a place to take pictures of myself. I post my measurements instead. I do happen to have pictures of myself from high school (5'2, 207 pounds) and when my brother graduated high school (173 pounds - which I managed on a low-carb crash diet just for that event and was back to 180 pounds within a month) and pictures from a couple of weeks ago, when I was supposedly 195. There is a noticeable difference between the two extremes, but where I am now, people claim that I don't look any heavier, and people who haven't seen me in high school don't realize I've lost weight. Oh well...I'm going to get back to where I was, and then down to my goal weight of somewhere around 140.

    Anyway, I don't think that before-and-after or progress picture are "fat shaming." I think it's exactly what it says: images showing progress toward a goal. People on here who have before and after pics seem to post them because they are proud of their hard work and their achievements. Also, there are plenty of people who bury all of their heavy pictures because they're embarrassed; with before and after, people are not hiding the fact that they used to be overweight...so it's kind of like the opposite of fat shaming.

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