another fat shaming post

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Replies

  • 1546mel
    1546mel Posts: 191
    Post pics away. I think it is wonderful to share progress, and i smile everytime i see someone's hard work pay off. its about getting healthy, and no matter what people want society to believe, fat is not healthy. I come from a fat family, and im telling ya, its not healthy ;) I had to learn how to eat properly, and that was HARD!
  • wrongfocus
    wrongfocus Posts: 1 Member
    Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)
  • Ayirela
    Ayirela Posts: 204 Member
    I personally find it motivating! I love when people post their progress pictures! I guess the people who make these comments have no urgency to change their life so they belittle the others who put in hard work. Which is disgraceful! I say keep on posting and forget about the bitter lazy people who would rather demean others than put in the effort!
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)

    So you are saying I am destined to remain in this unhealthy body, prone to various medical conditions, and I should just "love" my fat, unhealthy body. Sorry, I love myself, who and what I am. I don't necessarily love the package "I" come in right now. I want a new package.

    Sounds like you are "health shaming".
  • Cold_Steel
    Cold_Steel Posts: 897 Member
    I hate that this is even a topic...

    How self centered do you have to be to be offended by people who are posting images of their own fitness goals on a fitness and weight loss/gain website ?

    Fat shaming would be ...

    Hey Cold_Steel you lazy fat person you only lost 150 lbs you're still a fat person and you should be ashamed you fatty fat fat...

    Not hey Cold_Steel look at that you lost 150 lbs and you posted your evidence of your success on a website for FITNESS/ DIET/Weight Loss/ Weight Gain website.

    Come on people...
  • Alison12121
    Alison12121 Posts: 198 Member
    It's motivating for me. It makes me think that if they can do it, so can I.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)

    Why are you even on this website?
  • Cold_Steel
    Cold_Steel Posts: 897 Member
    Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)

    This wins today's post award.

    Show me the numbers Mr/Mrs 95 % of weight loss from myfitnesspal users gain it all back!

    Or is this a percentage you made up strictly for your delusional post?
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
    No I don't think it's fat shaming. Why? Because progress and success mean different things to different people.

    Examples of successes:

    - A overweight person becoming a healthy weight/bf%, and reducing their particular health problems.
    - An obese person becoming overweight. Still technically "unhealthy", but they may be in the best shape of their life (success)
    - A skinny person building muscle mass.
    - A healthy weight person reducing bf% to achieve more definition
    - An underweight person becoming a healthy weight.
    - A person improving their fitness levels.

    The list could go on and on.

    In no way are any of these success' stories, stating that the original is bad. The original may have presented health problems, which were brought up in the post. Yet they weren't shaming anyone else for being that way. They are merely sharing their happiness of being in better health, or workout towards their own goals. We all have our own personal goals, that others may share or not, but it is our choice and we have a right to be happy about it. Just like it is another persons choice if they want to remain like the befores.
  • shinesunfish
    shinesunfish Posts: 93 Member
    "If one considers that the photos show a person's personal progress toward their individual goal and are not necessarily a depiction of a "non-fat" person (whatever that is) then it is in no way a "shaming" but an affirmation.

    Personally, my "thin" weight and "thin" photos are probably someone else's "fat" photos...and visa versa."

    Best answer. I think this is a really good topic, because I can absolutely see the point of the blogger. Even the somewhat rude comments in this very thread point out that someone's size directly influences our opinion of them. Cigarettes and being overweight are truly the last acceptable forms of bullying, because you are ostensibly "doing it for their health."

    Let's be honest. You are not worried about a complete stranger's health. You are judging them based on their appearance, and feeling comfortable about doing it because you are using a random "health" excuse to assume that your judgement has some sort of objective reality. There is nothing objectively wrong with being overweight. I am quite overweight, and yet my blood pressure, heart rate, and cholesterol levels are great. I am not lazy. I do not smell. Fat has become a synonym in our society for all of the horrible things in the world, instead of being what it is - excess weight. Fat shaming is real, and it's not okay.

    That being said, before and after pics are not fat shaming. It's great for someone to be proud of their accomplishment, and it's uplifting when I see people whose opinion of themselves have directly improved because of their positive lifestyle changes. But that's not always the case - people often seem to be divorcing themselves from who they were - "I was so hideous back then, and now I'm hot!" That's partly why people who have lost a lot of weight are often really antagonistic to those who haven't - the "I'm not like you!" mentality. Losing weight isn't a fix-all to your problems; it won't give you a better personality, make you smarter, or in most cases make you more successful. It's just fat. When people refer to themselves as "disgusting," it makes me sad for them. It does not (and should not) make me feel any differently about myself, and I think that's the difference.

    This is a great series about losing a lot of weight: http://www.canyoustayfordinner.com/2011/05/11/what-i-miss-from-135lbs-agopart-

    The plain fact is, there's a lot of body shaming going around, especially on the internet. Whether up front "Fat people are gross and bitter," to subjugated "Wow, you look great now!", it'[s a real and damaging thing. I've spent too much of my own life on hold for that magical day of "When I lose the weight." No matter how much weight you lose, how you do your makeup or fix your hair, you will never look like a Victoria's Secret model. You can only look like you. I think it's important to love yourself, take care of yourself, and try to look like the best version of yourself that you can. I also think that once you manage that, and stop turning to unhealthy habits to fill the void, your body will find the right weight for it to be.

    Also, extreme thinness is definitely a synonym of weak and helpless, and it's definitely a symptom of a misogynistic culture. This is in reference to "skinny-fat" and eating disorders, which are still widely turned to instead of eating right and exercise, because "women shouldn't have muscles," or "I don't want to be too bulky." Fashion has existed for years to keep women in competition with each other and directly relates to seeming more dainty and petite. The ideal man is strong, fit, and mature. The ideal woman is young, petite, and thin. Just because you have a healthy body image doesn't mean that our culture as a whole does.

    Sorry this got crazy long. Good topic.
  • shinesunfish
    shinesunfish Posts: 93 Member
    P.S. Equally as damaging, but not nearly as prevalent: "You should eat a sandwich!" or "Real women have curves."

    Real women have vaginas. That's really the only way we measure that.
  • FATJAKE5
    FATJAKE5 Posts: 162
    I am not sure that I know what "fat shaming" is but,......................I am a carb addict. Like all addicts, my mind will make up a thousand excuses to get what it wants. Be it fat, carbs, alchohol, drugs, cigarettes, whatever. Anything that helps a fat, out of shape, un-healthy person get better is great. I am absolutely inspired by all the real people on this site who have lost 100 lbs in one year. I have been on a dozen diets, only to grow bigger after finding a lame excuse, ie. "love yourself as you are" to go back to eating and doing nothing but eat. If someone loves being fat, then they can be fat and do nothing. No-one is forcing them to look @ the pictures. I have lost 17 lbs in the first five weeks on MFP. Got off 6 different blood pressure pills per day. Went from 44W pants to 40's and last night had to wash my new 40W 517's in hot water to shrink them, 'cause they were falling off. MFP works for me because I can see exactly how everything I eat and do effects my health as well as my weight. At my fattest, I was 306 lbs 4 years ago. Diets took me as low as 246 lbs and then I found my self on the yo yo again at 296 lbs a few months ago. No more diets. I just began cutting back my portions and eliminating bad foods and walking. My daughter introduced me to MFP and I started 5 weeks, 3 days ago @ 282 lbs. Today I am @ 265 and feeling better every day. Those who have the courage to post their pics are tougher than I am. It was a picture of me taken @ Christmas with my gang of grandsons that got me motivated again.
  • Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)


    I genuinely curious on why you think this?
  • P.S. Equally as damaging, but not nearly as prevalent: "You should eat a sandwich!" or "Real women have curves."

    Real women have vaginas. That's really the only way we measure that.

    Some women don't have vaginas either :P

    *not being rude here and I love your previous post! <3<3<3
  • I love looking at before and after pictures! It shows the accomplishments of that person and they should be TRULY proud of it! Right now, to be honest, I hate the pictures of myself - but I took them so that when I look back, I have something that I can be proud of and see how far I have come. Being a heavier woman, I say if you are comfortable with yourself, then great - good for you. But don't look down on other people for posting pictures for motivation for themselves and others. It's not fat shaming - this site it FULL of people that need encouragement and motivation - sometimes it's just seeing what CAN be accomplished! To me, seeing what another person have accomplished means MORE then any degree or license - because they have been where I am and they can understand what I feel... just my opinion :)
  • alglenn2013
    alglenn2013 Posts: 97 Member
    Let's be honest. You are not worried about a complete stranger's health. You are judging them based on their appearance, and feeling comfortable about doing it because you are using a random "health" excuse to assume that your judgement has some sort of objective reality. There is nothing objectively wrong with being overweight. I am quite overweight, and yet my blood pressure, heart rate, and cholesterol levels are great. I am not lazy. I do not smell. Fat has become a synonym in our society for all of the horrible things in the world, instead of being what it is - excess weight. Fat shaming is real, and it's not okay.

    This! Your entire post was well spoken, but this quote here was magic! Well said!
  • BlueInkDot
    BlueInkDot Posts: 702 Member
    I think the main problem is when people think that fat = ugly. Fat doesn't equal ugly. Hating yourself is ugly. Loving yourself is beautiful. You can be fat an love yourself and thus be beautiful. And you can be slim and healthy and hate yourself and thus be ugly.
    #justsayin
    Sure, that's true, but there's a grey area when you get too big and are really putting your heart or bone/joints at risk, the REALITY OF THE SITUATION gets ugly. It's not natural, and as much as people say we're supposed to have meat on our bones- we're not supposed to be 100 to 200 pounds overweight.

    I agree. My point is that "healthy vs. unhealthy" and "ugly vs. beautiful" should be viewed seperately. When someone feels that their weight makes them ugly, they get depressed, and once they are depressed, how can they move forward to success? That is a serious problem. However, if they were to define their beauty by loving themselves instead, then maybe they can love themselves first, and then have the self-worth to address their health.

    You can't get healthy by punishing your body. You have to get healthy by viewing your body as something worth being cared for.

    You don't lose weight and THEN discover self-worth, you discover self-worth so that you can lose weight. Does that make sense?

    I say things wierd, hopefully that made sense... :P
  • Doesn't matter what you do or what you write about, someone is always gonna get butt-hurt about it...
  • Loving myself no matter how I look won't prevent me from having a heart attack and dying at 50. It's not about love it's about health.
  • SadKitty27
    SadKitty27 Posts: 416 Member
    It is a visual representation of what they truly achieved. I think it's both inspiring and motivating - not fat shaming at all.

    I think it's important to love yourself and be comfortable with your size, but let's face it....I bet that If you gave these overweight people complaining that it's "fat shaming" the option of either looking like a Victoria Secret model with no effort overnight, or to stick with their current physique because they "love their body" so much; I almost guarantee that they'd all secretly want to look like the model and not their current selves.

    Why? Because no one really truly wants to be fat (except maybe Susanne Eman lol )

    Source for those who didn't get the Susanne Eman joke :

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2026964/Susanne-Emans-bid-worlds-fattest-woman-52st-mother-2-supersizing.html
  • Lyerin
    Lyerin Posts: 818 Member
    I think it is motivating because you can see the progress and how much healthier and happier people look when they are feeling better about themselves. I imagine it is motivating for the person posting too because they can see how far they have come.
  • LoseWithLaurie
    LoseWithLaurie Posts: 64 Member
    Wtf is "fat shaming"?

    Facts:
    The vast majority of people who are fat, overweight, obese etc are that way because of bad choices, not uncontrollable circumstances. Most of the time, it is our own fault!

    Being overweight is UNHEALTHY! It's not even up for discussion. It's been proven countless times. Losing excess body fat not only looks better, it IS better.

    Making the commitment to lose fat, become healthy and improve the quality of ones life is an INCREDIBLE feat and should be shared and celebrated!

    Posting a before photo is what it is and no more. It marks the beginning of a difficult and amazing journey. And to anyone on this journey, congratulations! It's is a long tough road for most of us and I applaud all of you who commit to changing your life this way!!!

    I was FAT. I had been too ashamed to post my before picture. I was ashamed because I was hideous to look at. I was a swollen bulging unhappy mess of a person who missed out on life for a decade! Being obese is a very poor choice. I am ashamed of my poor choices. I can OWN this...other people need to as well:)
  • LoseWithLaurie
    LoseWithLaurie Posts: 64 Member
    Do they post the pics a few years later when NINETY FIVE PERCENT have gained back all weight lost ... and usually more? This is the reality. Those "after" photos are the photos of the FIRST part of the weight cycling process that CAUSES most people to gain more weight than when they started. To get OFF the WEIGHT CYCLING merry-go-round, focus on self-care and body appreciation in the body you have today. (And stop promoting your temp weight loss to encourage others to weight cycle.)

    So you are saying I am destined to remain in this unhealthy body, prone to various medical conditions, and I should just "love" my fat, unhealthy body. Sorry, I love myself, who and what I am. I don't necessarily love the package "I" come in right now. I want a new package.


    AMEM<3
    Sounds like you are "health shaming".
  • Mcgrawhaha
    Mcgrawhaha Posts: 1,596 Member
    Fat people being angry and bitter they're fat and lazy. That's all there is to it, as harsh as it sounds.

    Thank you for illustrating the difference between perceived fat shaming and actual fat shaming.

    Newsflash: Not everyone who is overweight got there by being lazy. Disease, prescription drugs, car accidents... on my friends list alone, I've got people in these categories, some of them who had to lose 100+ pounds.

    As for the original question, no, I don't see progress pics as fat shaming. But I'm also not going to take cheap shots at those who feel differently than I do.

    agreed, my husband was in a head on collision 4 years ago at the age of 29. he fractured his spine, and has been in horrible pain since. in 4 years, he went from 6 ft 2 and 215 pounds, to almost 300 pounds. he was unable to be the active husband and father that we were used to. only this last year, after more invasive procedures, has he had relief from the pain, and in a matter of 6 months, brought his weight back down to 225. he was never, "LAZY"... thats not how he gained his weight... he gained his weight after a devestating car accident caused by a 90 year old women not paying attention to the road!

    other than that, WE LOVE BEFORE AND AFTER PICTURES!!! i dont think its shameful at all... very motivating!!! i have even posted my own progress pics!
  • BioMechHeretic
    BioMechHeretic Posts: 128 Member
    Fat people being angry and bitter they're fat and lazy. That's all there is to it, as harsh as it sounds.

    Thank you for illustrating the difference between perceived fat shaming and actual fat shaming.

    Newsflash: Not everyone who is overweight got there by being lazy. Disease, prescription drugs, car accidents... on my friends list alone, I've got people in these categories, some of them who had to lose 100+ pounds.

    As for the original question, no, I don't see progress pics as fat shaming. But I'm also not going to take cheap shots at those who feel differently than I do.

    Yea, no. I did not say everyone who is fat is lazy.

    I said anyone who is fat AND says that progress pics are "fat shaming" are just bitter that they are fat, and if they are that bitter about it than yes there is a good chance they are lazy about it. Big difference.

    It's amazing that nearly every single person who has lost lots of weight and is now fit(no matter whether they gained it from disease,a terrible accident, laziness, overeating etc) will basically say "yup I was lazy then even if only for a little while, and then I decided to make a change and now I'm fit and have overcome my obstacles" whereas anyone who is bitter about being fat will come up with every excuse in the the world on why they got fat/are fat EXCEPT being lazy. How strange.
  • aaronlawrenc
    aaronlawrenc Posts: 666 Member
    Doesn't matter what you do or what you write about, someone is always gonna get butt-hurt about it...

    this made me butt hurt
  • aaronlawrenc
    aaronlawrenc Posts: 666 Member
    tumblr_macj7vJLgK1r9dv1qo1_400.gif
  • purpleleopard76
    purpleleopard76 Posts: 77 Member
    Whether or not it is motivating is dependent upon an individuals goals. We all came her to shed weight, therefore, your responses will pretty much resonate with motivating. However, apparently this lady who made these comments intends to stay big. But rather than her being demotivated, because she really isn't motivated in the first place, it's more likely that it is causing her to feel some measure of guilt for treating her body so badly.

    I soooo agree. These people do recognise that they're treating themselves badly but just don't want to admit it. I don't know one overweight person who is genuinely happy being overweight (me included) - despite what they like to pretend to themselves and everyone else. Think of all the restrictions on your life - you can't go and play with your kids, you struggle fitting into swings and rides at the park etc, your health suffers, you set a bad example for your kids, you struggle buying shoes & clothes cos you need wider fittings or bigger sizes. For instance, I'm not particularly large (UK 14) and I hate going into a normal high street stores to buy clothes. Why? Because it is so hard to find anything that fits well or makes me look and feel good in. If I feel that then surely someone bigger than me must feel that too!

    Yes society makes everyone feel a bit pressured into being smaller / fitter / prettier etc but think what we'd become if there was no pressure and everyone just let themselves go - I dread to think!! I also think that it is natural to want to look and feel your best. Yes, everyone should be treated equally regardless of their size and yes it's ok to have curves - but when the curves become tyres of fat putting pressure on all your vital organs it's just not pretty regardless what anyone says.

    These people just don't want to admit to themselves that their size makes them unhappy and unhealthy because that means that they need to make the first step and do something about it, and I think without a good kick up the backside or that first heart attack (if they survive it) to bring them into reality, sadly they just won't ever admit it to themselves because it requires effort and commitment which they're not willing to give - they've let it go to the point where it's easier for them to do nothing!

    In my opinion this is a selfish attitude because they either don't think or don't care about the effect their lifestyle has on their family & friends who probably worry about them on a daily basis and not to mention the huge strain on the health service with billions of taxpayers money being spent every year on weight related illnesses. Being overweight is mostly self inflicted (there are some who are overweight through medical reasons) but it is also treatable and the money spent every year on obesity could be put to better use such as vital funding for research into cancer etc which is not treatable and not self inflicted.

    Sure everyone struggles, but if you don't love yourself and respect your body the way you deserve to in order to enjoy your life, nobody else is going to do it for you and I for one would rather put in the effort to make sure that I am as fit and healthy as I can be in order to enjoy my life with my sons and to ensure that I will be there for them for as long as possible and to give them the best possible start in life by setting them the example they need to make sure that they know the importance of eating healthily and looking after themselves for when I'm not here.

    Sorry if i ranted but these people just make me MAD!!! All it takes is a bit of effort even if it's only a little bit at a time - at least you're taking responsibility for yourself, your health and you're future.
  • baileybiddles
    baileybiddles Posts: 457 Member
    Whether or not it is motivating is dependent upon an individuals goals. We all came her to shed weight, therefore, your responses will pretty much resonate with motivating. However, apparently this lady who made these comments intends to stay big. But rather than her being demotivated, because she really isn't motivated in the first place, it's more likely that it is causing her to feel some measure of guilt for treating her body so badly.

    I soooo agree. These people do recognise that they're treating themselves badly but just don't want to admit it. I don't know one overweight person who is genuinely happy being overweight (me included) - despite what they like to pretend to themselves and everyone else. Think of all the restrictions on your life - you can't go and play with your kids, you struggle fitting into swings and rides at the park etc, your health suffers, you set a bad example for your kids, you struggle buying shoes & clothes cos you need wider fittings or bigger sizes. For instance, I'm not particularly large (UK 14) and I hate going into a normal high street stores to buy clothes. Why? Because it is so hard to find anything that fits well or makes me look and feel good in. If I feel that then surely someone bigger than me must feel that too!

    Yes society makes everyone feel a bit pressured into being smaller / fitter / prettier etc but think what we'd become if there was no pressure and everyone just let themselves go - I dread to think!! I also think that it is natural to want to look and feel your best. Yes, everyone should be treated equally regardless of their size and yes it's ok to have curves - but when the curves become tyres of fat putting pressure on all your vital organs it's just not pretty regardless what anyone says.

    These people just don't want to admit to themselves that their size makes them unhappy and unhealthy because that means that they need to make the first step and do something about it, and I think without a good kick up the backside or that first heart attack (if they survive it) to bring them into reality, sadly they just won't ever admit it to themselves because it requires effort and commitment which they're not willing to give - they've let it go to the point where it's easier for them to do nothing!

    In my opinion this is a selfish attitude because they either don't think or don't care about the effect their lifestyle has on their family & friends who probably worry about them on a daily basis and not to mention the huge strain on the health service with billions of taxpayers money being spent every year on weight related illnesses. Being overweight is mostly self inflicted (there are some who are overweight through medical reasons) but it is also treatable and the money spent every year on obesity could be put to better use such as vital funding for research into cancer etc which is not treatable and not self inflicted.

    Sure everyone struggles, but if you don't love yourself and respect your body the way you deserve to in order to enjoy your life, nobody else is going to do it for you and I for one would rather put in the effort to make sure that I am as fit and healthy as I can be in order to enjoy my life with my sons and to ensure that I will be there for them for as long as possible and to give them the best possible start in life by setting them the example they need to make sure that they know the importance of eating healthily and looking after themselves for when I'm not here.

    Sorry if i ranted but these people just make me MAD!!! All it takes is a bit of effort even if it's only a little bit at a time - at least you're taking responsibility for yourself, your health and you're future.

    You basically just described who I was before I realized who I was and decided to change. Everything you've said is completely true.. Very well worded.
  • tracieangeletti
    tracieangeletti Posts: 432 Member
    i agree but I'm angry and bitter

    This :laugh: