pregnancy doesn't "ruin" your body...

People have children for selfish reasons, why shouldn't people be allowed to NOT have children for selfish reasons? I don't judge anyone for not wanting children. Period.

Agreed. So surprised at the judgment.. if anything, more power to the people who can admit for selfish or unselfish reasons that they do not wish to procreate..

Well, all I have to say is that my twins did ruin my belly. They destroyed it. Stretch marks deep enough to drive a car through, handfuls of sagging skin, and a muscle separation 5 years post-partum that the doctor called "worst-case scenario." Was I as careful as I should have been about what I ate? Probably not, but I'm not going to beat myself up about it. I have given birth to 4 healthy children who weighed a total of 30+ pounds and have gained and lost more than a normal-sized adult. I wouldn't consider my body ruined, but it's definitely not what it was when I was 27 (before my first child). I have worked hard and gotten back to pre-baby weight and am more fit than I ever have been. The stomach damage requires surgery to repair. I'm not going to feel guilty about that either.

People have children for selfish reasons, why shouldn't people be allowed to NOT have children for selfish reasons? I don't judge anyone for not wanting children. Period.

this.

Not sure why people are so offended by her reason not to have kids. Her reason sounds perfectly fine to me. She really doesn't need a good reason NOT to have them as others have stated. Way too many people have kids and then make crappy parents. Having sex and then pushing a baby out of a vagina isn't some big accomplishment that needs to be praised.

I thought that the o.p.'s post was just rude and condescending towards mothers who haven't had as easy a time in losing the weight as she did.

*nods*

Wow!

People have children for selfish reasons, why shouldn't people be allowed to NOT have children for selfish reasons? I don't judge anyone for not wanting children. Period.

this.

Not sure why people are so offended by her reason not to have kids. Her reason sounds perfectly fine to me. She really doesn't need a good reason NOT to have them as others have stated. Way too many people have kids and then make crappy parents. Having sex and then pushing a baby out of a vagina isn't some big accomplishment that needs to be praised.

I thought that the o.p.'s post was just rude and condescending towards mothers who haven't had as easy a time in losing the weight as she did.

Some people think that if you choose not to have kids, you think that having kids is dumb and they're dumb for having kids. I had a friend who is pregnant who got upset when I told her I didn't want them, and neither does my partner. I've also had people tell me that its clearly my partner's idea-I love children and want to be a child psychologist. Nope, its my idea. One of those told me I should just get pregnant without my partner's consent. lol, if I can't form an opinion on having them on my own, I doubt I have the brains to get pregnant without him knowing. I've had people call me selfish. I've had friends ask me who is going to take care of me and my partner when we get older, and that's a selfish reason to have kids if I've ever heard one.
/endthreadjacking
Edit: If anyone cares, people who choose not to have kids are called 'childfree', not 'childless'. 'Childless' makes it sound like we're berefit, and if someone chooses not to do something, they aren't suffering.

I lost the baby weight fairly quickly for having 2 babies in less than 2 years, but my body didn't realize it until recently

hey, no fair !! you are one of those people who stay skinny whole pregnancy, then have serious elastic skin to shrink back to normal..it does ruin a lot bodies, but some of us just arent lucky enough to have the good genes:sad: the reason i let myself go was not because of pregnancy..it was because i was suddenly mom and dad while my hubby was in the army, and i had a 2 and 3 year old, sitting at home all day not doing much of much..some years later tho, i decided to start here, and with many ups and downs, im getting back to where i need to be..if we let ourselves go, getting back to normal should count for something

op, i'm so glad to hear that your body wasn't ruined. mine was shot to **** -- having quadruplets and vertical c-section tends to do that to some people. all i can do is embrace my good fortune and learn to love tankinis.

It totally depends on your skin type. The OP seems to have been blessed in that department, but to imply that people who don't bounce back only have themselves to blame is more than ludicrous, it's unfair. I was very slim before I had my two boys, but two large babies (8.5lbs and just under 10lbs) in the belly of a redhead with pale/ sensitive/ thin skin in under two years has done untold damage. My boys are 16 and 18 now and I still have stretch marks up to my belly button and down to my thighs. Yes, they've faded but it sure as hell wasn't my fault I got them - I was fit, rubbing my belly with all kinds of creams and didn't put a ridiculous amount of weight on either.

Late to the party as well, but I'm going to second the middle-finger poster above. Seems this was little more than a backwards excuse to post the oh-my-god-i'm-great pics (yay?), and while I'm happy for you (and I'm a let you finish), it's just petty. And pointless.

HAHAHA well said!

Wow -

I'm appalled that so many people are saying "congrats on having good genetics" and suggesting this girl is just showing off something that comes naturally to her.

This girl's body looks to me like the result of hard work and close attention, and it's ridiculous to say that she looks so good because it's "in her genetics." I know you want to feel better about yourselves, and even that positivity will help you move forward... but bashing people for looking good, or lessening someone else's hard work by suggesting they didn't have to work for it is unrealistic and downright offensive.

Pregnancy does have legitimate effects on the body which cause weight gain, but that doesn't mean it can't be prevented, while maintaining the baby's health. Yes, it's hard, but your results reflect the amount of work you put in before, during, and after your pregnancy. I'm willing to bet most of you didn't have flat tummies before your pregnancy, and/or didn't work as hard as this girl to stay in shape during and after.

Stop making excuses to make yourselves feel better.

Edit: Let me reiterate, I am NOT saying you're letting yourself go just because you're pregnant... I'm saying, this girl probably put in EXTRA work and worked really hard. I don't think this should be expected of anyone, just that it's possible for anyone.

Wow -

I'm appalled that so many people are saying "congrats on having good genetics" and suggesting this girl is just showing off something that comes naturally to her.

This girl's body looks to me like the result of hard work and close attention, and it's ridiculous to say that she looks so good because it's "in her genetics." I know you want to feel better about yourselves, and even that positivity will help you move forward... but bashing people for looking good, or lessening someone else's hard work by suggesting they didn't have to work for it is unrealistic and downright offensive.

Pregnancy does have legitimate effects on the body which cause weight gain, but that doesn't mean it can't be prevented, while maintaining the baby's health. Yes, it's hard, but your results reflect the amount of work you put in before, during, and after your pregnancy. I'm willing to bet most of you didn't have flat tummies before your pregnancy, and/or didn't work as hard as this girl to stay in shape during and after.

Stop making excuses to make yourselves feel better.

Edit: Let me reiterate, I am NOT saying you're letting yourself go just because you're pregnant... I'm saying, this girl probably put in EXTRA work and worked really hard. I don't think this should be expected of anyone, just that it's possible for anyone.

Wow -

I'm appalled that so many people are saying "congrats on having good genetics" and suggesting this girl is just showing off something that comes naturally to her.

This girl's body looks to me like the result of hard work and close attention, and it's ridiculous to say that she looks so good because it's "in her genetics." I know you want to feel better about yourselves, and even that positivity will help you move forward... but bashing people for looking good, or lessening someone else's hard work by suggesting they didn't have to work for it is unrealistic and downright offensive.

Pregnancy does have legitimate effects on the body which cause weight gain, but that doesn't mean it can't be prevented, while maintaining the baby's health. Yes, it's hard, but your results reflect the amount of work you put in before, during, and after your pregnancy. I'm willing to bet most of you didn't have flat tummies before your pregnancy, and/or didn't work as hard as this girl to stay in shape during and after.

Stop making excuses to make yourselves feel better.

Edit: Let me reiterate, I am NOT saying you're letting yourself go just because you're pregnant... I'm saying, this girl probably put in EXTRA work and worked really hard. I don't think this should be expected of anyone, just that it's possible for anyone.

Be appalled as much as you want cause a lot of people here certainly don't appreciate reading a presumptuous post from someone who was already thin to begin with, assuming that because they had children and gained weight means they let themselves go or that they are not genetically predisposed to sagging skin (which yes, affects the appearance of that six pack abs look). OP is fortunate, I congratulate her on her success but am disappointed at a post that could have been an empowering one that turned out to be downright insulting to those of us who are different from her. Just sayin'

Wow -

I'm appalled that so many people are saying "congrats on having good genetics" and suggesting this girl is just showing off something that comes naturally to her.

This girl's body looks to me like the result of hard work and close attention, and it's ridiculous to say that she looks so good because it's "in her genetics." I know you want to feel better about yourselves, and even that positivity will help you move forward... but bashing people for looking good, or lessening someone else's hard work by suggesting they didn't have to work for it is unrealistic and downright offensive.

Pregnancy does have legitimate effects on the body which cause weight gain, but that doesn't mean it can't be prevented, while maintaining the baby's health. Yes, it's hard, but your results reflect the amount of work you put in before, during, and after your pregnancy. I'm willing to bet most of you didn't have flat tummies before your pregnancy, and/or didn't work as hard as this girl to stay in shape during and after.

Stop making excuses to make yourselves feel better.

Edit: Let me reiterate, I am NOT saying you're letting yourself go just because you're pregnant... I'm saying, this girl probably put in EXTRA work and worked really hard. I don't think this should be expected of anyone, just that it's possible for anyone.

:laugh:

Wow -

I'm appalled that so many people are saying "congrats on having good genetics" and suggesting this girl is just showing off something that comes naturally to her.

This girl's body looks to me like the result of hard work and close attention, and it's ridiculous to say that she looks so good because it's "in her genetics." I know you want to feel better about yourselves, and even that positivity will help you move forward... but bashing people for looking good, or lessening someone else's hard work by suggesting they didn't have to work for it is unrealistic and downright offensive.

Pregnancy does have legitimate effects on the body which cause weight gain, but that doesn't mean it can't be prevented, while maintaining the baby's health. Yes, it's hard, but your results reflect the amount of work you put in before, during, and after your pregnancy. I'm willing to bet most of you didn't have flat tummies before your pregnancy, and/or didn't work as hard as this girl to stay in shape during and after.

Stop making excuses to make yourselves feel better.

Edit: Let me reiterate, I am NOT saying you're letting yourself go just because you're pregnant... I'm saying, this girl probably put in EXTRA work and worked really hard. I don't think this should be expected of anyone, just that it's possible for anyone.

See my post above. NOTHING would have prevented my stretch marks. I was not overweight before, during or after pregnancy. I did have a flat stomach before pregnancy. Still got stretch marks. NOT MY FAULT.

or my split muscles. or the partial loss of sensation in my genitals.