Your most humiliating "fat" experience.

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  • pittbullgirl
    pittbullgirl Posts: 341 Member
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    All I can think is, you married this man why?

    THIS
  • SeaStar
    SeaStar Posts: 113
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    In middle school I was on the dance team and a friend of mine said I looked fat on stage when performing for the school. I wouldn't ever consider myself fat at all during my life, but that was still scarring growing up as I was never really skinny either, and made me second guess ever doing dance again for a long while.
  • angelams1019
    angelams1019 Posts: 1,102 Member
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    We all surely have some experience related to out weight that lingers in our minds. I wouldn't say I was even fat when this happened. I am 5'3", at the time I weighed 145 pounds. I was in the process of losing weight I gained from quitting smoking. Anyhoo, we were talking about going to the beach. My now husband, then boyfriend, made the remark that I should get a bigger swim suit. I was wondering what was wrong with the one I had. I asked him what he meant and why he said that. He would never really clarify. Finally he just yelled at me that I look disgusting in my swim suit. Needless to say, I haven't put on a swim suit since. I actually bought one last year, but I could never bring myself to wear the thing.

    When you look back on these things do they motivate you? Do you feel a sense of hopelessness that drives you to failure over and over?

    omg! Sorry, but your hubs sounds like a d*ck!

    My advice to you: JUST DO IT! Put the swim suit on. Even if its just in your bathroom by yourself. Let yourself feel the feelings that arise. Let them move through your body (but remain kind to yourself and those feelings. Don't judge them) The longer you wear the swimsuit, the sooner those feelings will pass. :flowerforyou:
  • virginia65us
    virginia65us Posts: 106 Member
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    Your husband kind of sounds like a jerk

    I had the same thought. If he had to comment at all, there are probably nicer ways of saying this.
  • angelams1019
    angelams1019 Posts: 1,102 Member
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    My most embarrassing moment was having to get a seatbelt extender on an airplane. Luckily (I've heard horror stories) the flight attendant was so sweet and discreet about it.
  • MissKitty9
    MissKitty9 Posts: 224 Member
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    I see way too many posts here made by (mostly) women whose husbands/boyfriends call them "disgusting" or "ugly" or "fat", it's sad. I get telling your partner, in a respectful way, that an article of clothing is not flattering, but nobody who loves you should say you look "disgusting". It's not motivational, it's just assholish behavior. Motivation needs to come from within, not from *kitten* making comments at you. Wtf.
  • BreakingUpWithObesity2013
    BreakingUpWithObesity2013 Posts: 276 Member
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    For one I can't believe you would marry someone that said something so hurtful. Anyways, my most embarrassing moment was my anniversary trip with my ex-husband to Kings Island. I LOVE roller coasters..but there was one that it took 3 people to get my belt latched...yea..that's who you want riding on the ride w/you! =(
  • SugarBaby71
    SugarBaby71 Posts: 3,630 Member
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    DH told me I was fat and gross and ugly... sex with me was a chore. THAT didn't motivate me... It made me sad and hungry.

    What motivated me was the doctor telling me that he would be happy with me if I could lose 10lbs by Christmas. (It was July) He had said I would begin to feel better and that I need to let everyone in my family start to fend for themselves and to start looking out for me. THAT was my motivation.
  • norahwynn
    norahwynn Posts: 862 Member
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    All I can think is, you married this man why?

    this...
  • MyM0wM0w
    MyM0wM0w Posts: 2,008 Member
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    My husband and I planned an wonderful weekend getaway at a nice hotel in Atlantic City. They had a FANTASTIC spa and he surprised me with a full day package of treatments (I suspect it was so he could spend the day gambling and I wouldn't bug him). I got down there and you had to wear a robe into the spa area, no clothes and no shoes. THey didn't have a robe big enough to fit me. Three women kept bringing me bigger and bigger robes (in the a changing room FULL of people) and when they got to the largest men's size all stood there staring at me like "Now what?"

    They refunded our money and I beat a hasty (and tearful) retreat back to our room where my husband was still getting dressed. It took him about half an hour to wheedle out of me exactly what happened. He kept apologizing for giving me the gift package, and kept asking if I wanted to switch hotels. It wasn't his fault and I had to buck up and pretend it didn't bother me so he would stop feeling so bad.
  • katiepeg46
    katiepeg46 Posts: 32 Member
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    That was a very cruel thing to say. He could have said it nicer.
  • tinylittlelove
    tinylittlelove Posts: 120 Member
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    I have a few. But the one that really sticks in my mind is when my cousin from New Zealand came over to stay.

    I'm 5'2 and at the time (August 2011) I was about 136lbs, which was still with a healthy BMI.

    He made numerous comments about my weight, a few examples was, "Carolyn, why don't you join a gym?" and "You could do with losing a bit of weight" Oh and bear in mind he was overweight himself.
    Anyway, this one time I'd gone downstairs to get some food, I made 2 tortilla wraps with chicken pieces, lettuce, tomato and some light mayo. To which he uttered "Do you really need all that food" "You'd lose a few pounds if you didn't eat so much"

    By November 2011 I weighed 115lbs.
  • louisegibbs85
    louisegibbs85 Posts: 304 Member
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    I would wear the swim suit and lap up the attention off other men right in font of your husband lol ten weeks after having my baby I got asked how far gone I was which wasn't good! And having get in the back of a car with a baby seat and another adult was quite a squeeze
  • SlimJanette
    SlimJanette Posts: 597 Member
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    I had my daughter in December and in the middle of January I went to buy a ring for her. I spoke to the sales lady and told her I was looking for a gem stone ring for my daughter for when she turns 16. The sales lady said to me...Maybe you should wait until after you deliver in case you have the baby in February. I was devastated.
  • Bdenmark8
    Bdenmark8 Posts: 5 Member
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    I think when your humiliated part of you goes "oh well" and you got eat your feelings.
    My turning point was a complete stranger coming up to me telling me "Congratulations"
    Erm...not pregnant.
    I laughed it off at the time but lay in bed that night thinking how hurt it made me feel.
    Next day i got up and started working out. I'm now working out and cutting calories and it's dang hard work and the results are sooooo slow. But everytime i want a fatty meal or a day off i think about that stranger and socking him in the eye. :) Sometimes you just need to stop feeling defeated and just get angry.
  • nadz6012
    nadz6012 Posts: 126 Member
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    Most embarrassing fat moment: ripping my pants multiple times in public because of the holes I wore in the thighs...
  • BeautifulByChoice
    BeautifulByChoice Posts: 60
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    A couple months ago I heard that my boyfriend at the time was talking to his friends about me. All of them questioned him on why he liked me, because I was "ugly and fat", and apparently the only thing good about me was that I was nice.
    They didn't say those things to my face, but just hearing about it really hurt.
  • Brenda1636
    Brenda1636 Posts: 36 Member
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    Some of these stories make me feel very sad for the people they happened to. Some people can be so cruel!! I was teased as a kid for being heavy and it sucked.

    As I grew up I put on more and more weight. I sat at a desk all day when I started working so I continued to gain weight. One year my boyfriend and I planned a trip to Cedar Point in Ohio. I was looking at the weight limits for the rides and said maybe we shouldn't go because I don't think I'll fit. But I convinced myself to go. I was able to on the older roller coasters but not the new ones. I let my boyfriend go on the cool rides while I walked around and found rides I could go on. I didn't want him to miss out just because I couldn't go on them. That was my wake up call!

    Years later, we returned to Cedar Point and I was able to fit on every last roller coaster!! :)
  • nak1a
    nak1a Posts: 69 Member
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    I dont know if I have had any really HUMILIATING experiences, but I've felt embarrassed a time or two and it usually stemmed from sitting in chairs. At 5'11, 300+lbs, not every chair is going to big and sturdy enough to handle my size. I tried sitting in a plastic outdoor-sy sorta chair before and my weight made the chair buckle but I remember sorta laughing it all. Yea, its embarrassing but I dont remember being torn up about it. As far as name calling and stuff, sure I got my share of that but by the time I hit high school I learned to speak up for myself and defend myself. Meaning, I might feel fat, disgusting, ugly and all of those horrible things but I won't let you point those things out to me to try to hurt me. Now as an adult being called "fat" by anyone doesn't hurt me. Its an adjective that pretty much accurately describes me. If someone were to call me fat or does call me fat, its just like...do you want a cookie for pointing out the obvious? I know I'm fat, I claim it, I recognize it. As of right now I am making lifestyle changes to lose weight but not because I can't love myself at the weight I am at, but because I want to live a healthier life. I am sure when I get to my goal weight there will still be people who consider me fat and thats fine because my life will still go on.

    As far as being humiliated by a spouse, I am a single person but I wouldnt let that fly. I would show them the door. You are more than your body, your weight. You are an actual person with feelings and emotions. If someone is committed to loving you, they wouldnt do things like that, in my opinion.
  • askeates
    askeates Posts: 1,490 Member
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    Many years ago when my 2 older children were young we used to get season passes to an amusement park near us. I knew that I had gained quite a bit of weight, but was at the defeated point.... I'd been in 2 bad car accidents back to back and exercise of any kind hurt, would sometimes even put me out of commission for weeks at a time. I had given up... but didn't think it was that bad.

    So the first day we went, we got our passes, and did a walk through the park and did a few things, nothing really taxing... but man was it a hard day! I was exhausted and out of breath most of the time, and had to catch up to the hubby and kids several times.

    The next visit, it was a little better as I had started walking when I could to try to build stamina.... so I decided I would try one of the roller coasters with the kids (they and the hubby had tried it and it was fairly smooth). It was one of the most popular so we waited in line for a couple hours. Finally we got inside, were picking our seats and I barely fit in the little car, but hey I fit! Then could NOT get the belt to latch, and couldn't get the bar to come down far enough to click into place! I was absolutely mortified.... How had I let myself get that bad?

    Needless to say, by the end of the summer season I had lost my first 40 pounds, and not only was I keeping up with the rest of the family walking, but I was eventually able to fit in that coaster to ride!

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