I'm tired, cranky now I read Kate Upton is fat?!

Is she in shape?
No.

I don't understand this at all, and I've seen it a few times in this thread. :noway:

Not having visible abs doesn't mean you're not in shape, not healthy, or don't work out. It just means you have a higher level of body fat.

So I'm actually ashamed of myself for creating this post. I have easily fallen into the pattern of taking a woman's body and picking it apart. I'm embarrassed I did that and fell into the trap.

I came at it from one being tired and vulnerable, and two finding that deep sense of insecurity when a woman who I find absolutely beautiful was judged as "fat" or somehow as unattractive, not worthy enough. I've seen some of the more attractive and unattractive pictures, and I still find her to be alluring. I've heard she is only good for men's magazines or shouldn't model. That she is somehow not good enough to be on print. My opinion has not changed and in my eyes she is still gorgeous.

It got me to thinking about myself. I think this statement about her being "fat" really hit me hard both in my preferences and my own confidence. If a woman's body that I think is so attractive is not then that means I'm hideous and I'm even more worthless. I'm disgusting piece of blubber not worthy of any love or confidence. I'm a walking piece of dog sh-t. According to my initial thoughts.

But you know what...thats not true. Kate is beautiful every woman is beautiful. I dont care if Kate ever got to be 600lbs I would still think she is beautiful, nd if Kate is beautiful then I am beautiful. I am not unworthy. I am worthy. And it does not matter what anyone thinks because the only reality that is true to me is my perspective. I saw a picture the other day of myself holding a tree and my first thought was "I look like a moose with a tiny head." Not "wow I look so happy I'm carrying a child." No I went right to that place of self deprecation the place that is so comfortable.

So no longer am I going to talk about myself or others in such a self deprecating way. I'm going to see myself like I see Kate as the epitome of femininity. As I was getting ready for work today my fiance walks up to me gives me a kiss and tells me, "you're glowing." I am glowing and I am worthy. We are all lovely and worthy.

I know pretty cliche and sappy.

I think it kind of depends a little. My mother and I were the same weight, but people thought she was much smaller and thinner than me. I have a more curvy figure. I have a very small waist and a very curvy booty and thighs. I also have a smaller rib cage and smaller shoulders than her. But, her friend thought I was lying about my weight and that I was heavier than her. My mom has the straight body type, so her waist is not as small as mine, her rib cage and shoulders are bigger than mine. Her hips and booty are smaller than mine, and she has very very skinny legs with a thigh gap. we both weighed 100 pounds. I got my figure from my bio father's side of the family combined with the small frame and petiteness of my mother's side of the family.

Right, but you were probably both fully clothed. It looks different in a bikini or lingerie.

We were at the beach. I was in a bikini and she was wearing a black one piece. I was wearing the blue bikini that is in my profile pics. The shorts did make me look a little bigger on the bottom, just because the eye is drawn to the larger amount of material, as compared to a teeny bikini bottom. But, it's possible her friend was just trying to insult me and put me down. That's actually very highly likely (because I did think I was heavier than I was). And the woman that said it was wearing the same bikini as me (we both bought the same one independently). I had six pack abs and everything. I tried to explain about how my mother and I were shaped differently and she rolled her eyes at me and then said maybe I just had more fat and my mom had more muscle. Which didn't make sense because I was a professional dancer and had six pack abs and no cellulite or anything. I guess she was kind of setting me up. Why was she even asking me how much I weighed anyway.

Why are Women so critical of each other ?