Alright ladies... crazy things men have said to you... go!

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Replies

  • RodSuarez
    RodSuarez Posts: 6,309 Member
    New one today:
    At work I was out in the woods and my truck got stuck. As I was digging myself out a guy comes walking out of the woods and offers to help. Ok, I said.

    We got my truck out but he got dirty in the process. I told him thanks and that I felt guilty that he got dirty.

    He looked me up and down and said, "How guilty do you feel?"

    Indeed
    WHAT?!

    I would've answered "How dirty do you feel?" and winked.
  • Evilmuffin666
    Evilmuffin666 Posts: 132 Member
    I have a 8 month Great Dane and of course, am doing all the training. But I also have a Great Pyr and I take each dog out for separate walks. I take the Dane first, then the Pyr. Last Saturday, I came home from walking the Pyr, and my husband *****ed at me that the Dane cried the whole time I was gone..... He went on to say that I needed to train the Dane to not cry when I was not home. Like what?????? If I'm not here, how can I train him to stop crying?
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
    New one today:
    At work I was out in the woods and my truck got stuck. As I was digging myself out a guy comes walking out of the woods and offers to help. Ok, I said.

    We got my truck out but he got dirty in the process. I told him thanks and that I felt guilty that he got dirty.

    He looked me up and down and said, "How guilty do you feel?"

    Indeed
    WHAT?!

    I would've answered "How dirty do you feel?" and winked.

    I would have messed with his head a little but we were alone out in the woods. Lol
  • PepePants
    PepePants Posts: 47 Member
    Once at the gym while I was on a stair climber, a guy walked over and said, "You look like a movie star!" Smiling, I said, "Oh, yeah? Who?" "Roseanne Barr." Thanks a lot.
  • PBsMommy
    PBsMommy Posts: 1,166 Member
    Went out to eat with my husband's family for a birthday. His brother who is married with two kids looks at me and asks "When are you going to dump him and get with a real man, like me. " .... Right in front of his wife and mom.
  • skcardiog
    skcardiog Posts: 316 Member
    Bump . . .
  • cindybowcut
    cindybowcut Posts: 250 Member
    Was giving a guy that I had barely met a ride to his car from an activity. We talked the whole ride to his car about 10 minutes. He asked how often I date and I told him I hadn't for a while because I was focusing on my job and kids. When we got to his car he started to get out and said, I would give you a kiss but you don't like guys.
  • FJcntdwn2sknyluv
    FJcntdwn2sknyluv Posts: 651 Member
    "Tiny and petite, the way woman should be!"

    whatever helped me lose 50#'s walked around the ex who said it in a bikini this last weekend.. so thinking I win!
  • RodSuarez
    RodSuarez Posts: 6,309 Member
    New one today:
    At work I was out in the woods and my truck got stuck. As I was digging myself out a guy comes walking out of the woods and offers to help. Ok, I said.

    We got my truck out but he got dirty in the process. I told him thanks and that I felt guilty that he got dirty.

    He looked me up and down and said, "How guilty do you feel?"

    Indeed
    WHAT?!

    I would've answered "How dirty do you feel?" and winked.

    I would have messed with his head a little but we were alone out in the woods. Lol
    was he cute?
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
    New one today:
    At work I was out in the woods and my truck got stuck. As I was digging myself out a guy comes walking out of the woods and offers to help. Ok, I said.

    We got my truck out but he got dirty in the process. I told him thanks and that I felt guilty that he got dirty.

    He looked me up and down and said, "How guilty do you feel?"

    Indeed
    WHAT?!

    I would've answered "How dirty do you feel?" and winked.

    I would have messed with his head a little but we were alone out in the woods. Lol
    was he cute?

    Remember in Forrest Gump when he was running across the country with the beard?

    Yeah, kinda like that.
  • DesireeAshley90
    DesireeAshley90 Posts: 137 Member
    bump
  • RodSuarez
    RodSuarez Posts: 6,309 Member
    New one today:
    At work I was out in the woods and my truck got stuck. As I was digging myself out a guy comes walking out of the woods and offers to help. Ok, I said.

    We got my truck out but he got dirty in the process. I told him thanks and that I felt guilty that he got dirty.

    He looked me up and down and said, "How guilty do you feel?"

    Indeed
    WHAT?!

    I would've answered "How dirty do you feel?" and winked.

    I would have messed with his head a little but we were alone out in the woods. Lol
    was he cute?

    Remember in Forrest Gump when he was running across the country with the beard?

    Yeah, kinda like that.
    gross. well in my mind it played better, I should write an xxx film and use that story, just with a sexy guy instead of a creeper
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    Sure, I'll pay you back.

    Crazy thing is... I believed him.
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
    New one today:
    At work I was out in the woods and my truck got stuck. As I was digging myself out a guy comes walking out of the woods and offers to help. Ok, I said.

    We got my truck out but he got dirty in the process. I told him thanks and that I felt guilty that he got dirty.

    He looked me up and down and said, "How guilty do you feel?"

    Indeed
    WHAT?!

    I would've answered "How dirty do you feel?" and winked.

    I would have messed with his head a little but we were alone out in the woods. Lol
    was he cute?

    Remember in Forrest Gump when he was running across the country with the beard?

    Yeah, kinda like that.
    gross. well in my mind it played better, I should write an xxx film and use that story, just with a sexy guy instead of a creeper

    I give my permission. Lol
  • CarlaRG
    CarlaRG Posts: 264
    I was helping out with an EMT training day and was called to be a victim of an accident. The EMT students had to do a step by step of their assessment of the victim (me)...everything was fine until this one guy got to my hips..he paused and the Captain asked what he would do next....student replied "Pelvic thrusts".....
  • kkclif
    kkclif Posts: 155 Member
    My ex told me a BJ "doesn't count" unless it lasts 40 minutes.

    LOLOL

    There's a reason he is my ex.

    I would say, "You can't make it 40 seconds... what do I do for other 39 minutes?"

    Lol I was just thinking of how impressive that would be if he lasted that long. :laugh:
  • RodSuarez
    RodSuarez Posts: 6,309 Member
    I won't send roses
    Or hold the door
    I won't remember
    Which dress you wore
    My heart is too much in control
    The lack of romance in my soul
    Will turn you grey, kid
    So stay away, kid
    Forget my shoulder
    When you're in need
    Forgetting birthdays
    Is guaranteed
    And should I love you, you would be
    The last to know
    I won't send roses
    And roses suit you so
  • _AllieCat_
    _AllieCat_ Posts: 515 Member
    Let me put the tip in nothing else.

    What???? :noway:

    Haven't we all heard that one once or twice. :noway:
  • babyj0
    babyj0 Posts: 531 Member
    "Can I lick your *kitten*... can I smell it at least?! Please?"

    Lol the bf.
    But also, the ex was fascinated by it as will. Was it with you guys?!
  • madelonism
    madelonism Posts: 292 Member
    its always the 50+ men that come into my store. the worst was

    "wow your a sexy redhead. my wife used to have red hair..."

    it was so creepy. what did he do to his wife/her hair???
  • beastmodekittyx
    beastmodekittyx Posts: 97 Member
    one time, i was at the bar and I guy came up o me and straight up said: '' did you know semen was a good source of protein?''
    Thanks, guy from the bar.
  • michellemybelll
    michellemybelll Posts: 2,228 Member
    not so much something that was said, but something that happened.

    dude approached me at the gym - said he'd seen me out running around my neighborhood and was exclaiming about how long i'm out pounding the pavement. ok cool. we chat for a bit, seem to hit it off. go out for drinks and fun that weekend, but i wasn't really feeling it. next day dude is nonstop texting and calling, to which i am kind of half-heartedly replying, but definitely deflecting any future plans he was trying to make. unfortunately, however, i made the mistake of allowing dude to meet me at my place for our first (and only!) date, so he knew where i lived (and i live alone mind you). one evening i'm chilling, and this banging starts at my front door. i'm a little taken aback, tip toe up to my door and peer out the peephole. it's crazy gym dude. continuing to pound incessantly. i don't know why i didn't just open the door and tell him to beat it (i'm awkward, avoid confrontation, who the **** knows), but dude kept pounding and yelling through the door for a solid 10 minutes. went away for a bit. thought he was gone, but no then pounding started up again. i'm thoroughly freaked out now and convinced he's going to break my door down or come around back and break through my sliders. i'm texting my sisters and dad frantically. my dad is telling me to call the cops, as is my big sister - but obviously i didn't. in hindsight i know i wasn't in that much danger, just really freaked out in the moment. to top it all off though, after awhile i go out to my car to take off and head over to my sister's house for a bit to calm the **** down, and he's left a goddamn NOTE on my windshield!!

    that was probably one of the craziest things i've had happen to me by a man. and holy awkwardness when we next saw each other at the gym.
  • xvxCelticWandererxvx
    xvxCelticWandererxvx Posts: 2,890 Member
    Just last weekend, a bloke said to me, "I see your wedding ring, so where's your husband?" and then he later stated, "You won't let me take you home with me."

    *smh* lol
  • chelsifina
    chelsifina Posts: 346 Member
    i was a 20-something in college (the Clinton years) and a 40-something man tried to hit on me by saying, "You look like Monica Lewinski!" I was so offended (and drunk)and I responded in a way that was super-out of character for my usual reserved, rule-abiding personality. I grabbed him by the collar with one hand and pulled him real close and cocked my other fist as if prepping to punch. In a really low voice I said, "Is that supposed to be a f****ing compliment? Its not." He was speechless, as were my friends. I didn't get bothered for the rest of the night.
  • kevinjb1
    kevinjb1 Posts: 233 Member
    Gotta read this later.
  • babyj0
    babyj0 Posts: 531 Member
    not so much something that was said, but something that happened.

    dude approached me at the gym - said he'd seen me out running around my neighborhood and was exclaiming about how long i'm out pounding the pavement. ok cool. we chat for a bit, seem to hit it off. go out for drinks and fun that weekend, but i wasn't really feeling it. next day dude is nonstop texting and calling, to which i am kind of half-heartedly replying, but definitely deflecting any future plans he was trying to make. unfortunately, however, i made the mistake of allowing dude to meet me at my place for our first (and only!) date, so he knew where i lived (and i live alone mind you). one evening i'm chilling, and this banging starts at my front door. i'm a little taken aback, tip toe up to my door and peer out the peephole. it's crazy gym dude. continuing to pound incessantly. i don't know why i didn't just open the door and tell him to beat it (i'm awkward, avoid confrontation, who the **** knows), but dude kept pounding and yelling through the door for a solid 10 minutes. went away for a bit. thought he was gone, but no then pounding started up again. i'm thoroughly freaked out now and convinced he's going to break my door down or come around back and break through my sliders. i'm texting my sisters and dad frantically. my dad is telling me to call the cops, as is my big sister - but obviously i didn't. in hindsight i know i wasn't in that much danger, just really freaked out in the moment. to top it all off though, after awhile i go out to my car to take off and head over to my sister's house for a bit to calm the **** down, and he's left a goddamn NOTE on my windshield!!

    that was probably one of the craziest things i've had happen to me by a man. and holy awkwardness when we next saw each other at the gym.

    What did the note say???! Lol
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    OH OH OH! How could I forget this gem!

    I had a guy once say to me "you have such beautiful, porcelain skin, you'd look amazing in a casket!"

    Ummmm thanks?


    ack! :noway:
  • michellemybelll
    michellemybelll Posts: 2,228 Member
    not so much something that was said, but something that happened.

    dude approached me at the gym - said he'd seen me out running around my neighborhood and was exclaiming about how long i'm out pounding the pavement. ok cool. we chat for a bit, seem to hit it off. go out for drinks and fun that weekend, but i wasn't really feeling it. next day dude is nonstop texting and calling, to which i am kind of half-heartedly replying, but definitely deflecting any future plans he was trying to make. unfortunately, however, i made the mistake of allowing dude to meet me at my place for our first (and only!) date, so he knew where i lived (and i live alone mind you). one evening i'm chilling, and this banging starts at my front door. i'm a little taken aback, tip toe up to my door and peer out the peephole. it's crazy gym dude. continuing to pound incessantly. i don't know why i didn't just open the door and tell him to beat it (i'm awkward, avoid confrontation, who the **** knows), but dude kept pounding and yelling through the door for a solid 10 minutes. went away for a bit. thought he was gone, but no then pounding started up again. i'm thoroughly freaked out now and convinced he's going to break my door down or come around back and break through my sliders. i'm texting my sisters and dad frantically. my dad is telling me to call the cops, as is my big sister - but obviously i didn't. in hindsight i know i wasn't in that much danger, just really freaked out in the moment. to top it all off though, after awhile i go out to my car to take off and head over to my sister's house for a bit to calm the **** down, and he's left a goddamn NOTE on my windshield!!

    that was probably one of the craziest things i've had happen to me by a man. and holy awkwardness when we next saw each other at the gym.

    What did the note say???! Lol

    lol nothing too outrageous. something like "hey what's up it's mike. what happened? lol gimme a call" ...i remember thinking the fact that he hand wrote "lol" i thought was kind of weird - but at that point i was just SO weirded out! lol
  • WhitneySheree88
    WhitneySheree88 Posts: 222 Member
    My very first date EVER. I was 16 years old and got asked out by a guy that I had been friends with/had a crush on for 2 years on valentines day. We went to see the movie, Hitch then he took me to the mall. He didn't want to take me home to early because he would miss out on some time with me (his words not mine). He walks me into Victoria Secret, sees a group of women that work there and says. "Hey, can one of you please find something sexy for my girl to slip into" one of the women walks over and says "Sure what size?" Mind you I am embarrassed and so NOT slipping into anything with this guy on our first date. He looks at me and says "An 8" accurate!! And I never even told him what size I wore. I was stunned and shocked asked him to take me home.
  • RodSuarez
    RodSuarez Posts: 6,309 Member
    "Can I lick your *kitten*... can I smell it at least?! Please?"

    Lol the bf.
    But also, the ex was fascinated by it as will. Was it with you guys?!
    keep it clean, and try it... you will enjoy being rimmed.