I DO NOT WANT my cake and I DO NOT WANT to eat it too...

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  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
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    I think you need to obtain a healthier relationship with food.

    If you think one piece of a birthday cake on your birthday is going turn you fat or make you 'feel' fat and disgusting than your delusional.
  • AnnieBear80
    AnnieBear80 Posts: 20 Member
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    If you don't want to eat it, don't. It's your birthday and your body.

    Having said that, it's my birthday today and I went to the gym, then met up with a friend who bought me a coffee and cake. It was delicious :D
  • kimmymayhall
    kimmymayhall Posts: 419 Member
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    If you don't want to eat it, don't. It's your birthday and your body.

    Having said that, it's my birthday today and I went to the gym, then met up with a friend who bought me a coffee and cake. It was delicious :D
    Happy Birthday! I hope you enjoyed your day, including delicious cake and coffee :flowerforyou:
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    FFS this is still going on?
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  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    Seems to me like the easiest thing to do would be to ask your sister for something else, like a fruit salad. It's your birthday, and she should understand if you aren't that into cake.

    If that doesn't work, I'd just eat the cake. I promise you that one piece is not going to hurt your body. I get into this kind of situation when I visit my grandma. She often will make something that is very high in calories that doesn't taste particularly good. I'll have a small piece anyway, because I realize that she spend time on something that she believed would make me happy.
  • marvybells
    marvybells Posts: 1,984 Member
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    What if she was recently diagnosed as diabetic? Does she need to scrape off the frosting and eat the cake then too or be considered rude?

    Anyway, the OP sounded to me like her mind was already made up that she was not going to eat cake, and wasn't looking to us to decide for her whether or not she was going to eat cake. She sounded to me like she wanted brainstorming for what to say to prevent hurting anyone's feelings. Personally, I'm working hard to let other people's hurt feelings be their problem if I am not doing anything to hurt them, but I think it's reasonable that the OP would be looking for that kind of information from us rather than questioning her decision.

    I suppose I should have just reassured her with a story about a close family member of mine. For a long while, he didn't like cake at his birthday, so we did a pie for him instead. Now he doesn't eat sugar/desserts at all, so there's been no pie for many a year now. Nobody gets on their ear about it. We just take him out for a steak, which he does enjoy immensely. And I order a very decadent dessert for myself because I want it, and I enjoy it. Nobody gets butt-hurt about that either.

    Personally, I'm sitting here thinking that if somebody wanted to make me a birthday treat and sweets did not exist, I'm thinking birthday nachos are in order...

    If I were diabetic, and my brother were handing me a slice of birthday cake, I'd kick him in the nuts. That seems.... unlikely.

    ^^^erm, actually it is not all that unlikely. I have several family members that became diabetic later in life. Sometimes people forget and offer them dessert. they politely decline.....

    and I am allergic to shellfish. occasionally my own family will forget and offer me things with crab or shrimp in them. I do not respond by kicking them in the nuts. I either say "no thank you" or gently remind them that it will cause Anaphylaxis and i could die. They are usually great about remembering, but inevitably someone will offer it to me. I don't get upset over it because I know that they aren't trying to kill me. They simply aren't stopping to run through a mental list of everyone's food allergies & medical conditions every time they try to be polite and offer up some food, and i do not expect them to.
  • marvybells
    marvybells Posts: 1,984 Member
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    FFS this is still going on?
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    yup :smile:
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,741 Member
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    Is there something else you would want in place of a standard birthday cake, that you could request?

    As long as there are other people there to eat the cake, then I guess it's no big deal if you don't have any, but to keep it from being awkward, you could accept a small piece and then kind of play with it on your plate. No one is going to be watching you to make sure you actually eat it.

    However, if you are only avoiding the cake because you have developed orthorexia, then that's very, very sad.

    This. All of this.

    I also really think it would be awesome to request something specific that you DO like, even if it seems "weird" and if your family is not willing to get that for you instead of cake then I would not feel bad at all for refusing the cake. I bought my fiance protein bars for Valentine's Day. I know you probably don't eat those either - who knows - but why not request a birthday treat that suits you better?
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,692 Member
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    Kinda like grandma buying you clothes you don't want. Be gracious. Accept.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Cait_Sidhe
    Cait_Sidhe Posts: 3,150 Member
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    I would like some of OP's cake please. And thank you.
  • PomegranatePriestess
    PomegranatePriestess Posts: 2,455 Member
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    I have never and I doubt I will ever meet someone who has sucked a d!ck in a dirty alley so they can get their next piece of cake/pie/ blah blah blah.

    Ummmm....I think this wins the prize for being the hands-down winner of the funniest single sentence I have ever seen in a thread on this site. :laugh:

    I do know someone who has had sex with someone they did not find attractive in order to get a Happy Meal. True story.
  • lindustum
    lindustum Posts: 212 Member
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    I either say "no thank you" or gently remind them that it will cause Anaphylaxis and i could die.
    :D:D:D
    you're not British by any chance? love it!
  • Witchdoctor58
    Witchdoctor58 Posts: 226 Member
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    Look. There are a few people here who are sugar addiction deniers. By your logic, there is also no such thing as gambling addiction, video game addiction, sex addiction, religion addiction (yes, Fundamentalists anonymous really exists), etc. Compulsive behavior is not limited to substance ingestion. For some people, a single exposure sets off a bad reaction and episode of (fill in your particular weakness here).

    Plus, as some people have pointed out, they would simply prefer not to sabotage their health, whether it be by reason of excessive calories, or a chemical cascade of inflammatory cytokines worsening autoimmune disease, or insulin response or whatever, for the sole purpose of making someone else feel better at their own expense.

    I watched my husband's ex-wife eat herself up to ~450 lbs before she suddenly dropped dead at the age of 52. Her live-in companion, who was her co-dependent and kept feeding her pure junk while fattening herself up, was just diagnosed with uterine cancer (#1 risk obesity). Worst of all, my young step-son, who grew up in that house of disordered eating, was just diagnosed with renal cancer (#1 risk obesity). Food addiction is very real and horribly sad and dangerous. Please respect those who have seen it and lived it. It is no better than alcohol, crack, heroin, gambling or any other compulsive, life-destroying behavior.
  • Alisha_countrymama
    Alisha_countrymama Posts: 821 Member
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    Just have a piece! I promise it won't kill you.

    Everyone has to choose what they will and will not put in their body. Maybe it's not a question of the piece of cake "killing" him, but it could be mentally the cake is unhealthy for him. That is how it is for me. I have had a bad unhealthy relationship with food in the past. And sometimes having that "one" piece can undo all my hard work. Sorry- I know people who have never been food addicts don't understand. But that is my personal experience.
  • rosemaryhon
    rosemaryhon Posts: 507 Member
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    It's my birthday tomorrow, there will be cake, I don't usually eat cake; I will eat cake tomorrow, I will eat it in a horribly violent manner.


    Have a Happy Birthday :flowerforyou:
  • willdob3
    willdob3 Posts: 640 Member
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    The best way to deal with this is going to be different for different people...

    Saying "no thanks" is not rude. If I knew someone is going to make a cake I'd let the person know ahead of time that I don't eat sugar so they could make other plans & avoid a scene. To not let them know would be kind of rude, IMHO.

    If I sometimes ate sugar I would make sure my birthday was one of the days I allowed for a treat. I used to do this when I had "free days" or "free meals." But I've never been a fan of cake so make me a birthday pie instead - pumpkin please & no whipped cream (never cared for it)! lol...

    But I no longer eat sugar at all - no exceptions - for several reasons, one being that my body does not react well to it. I let people know that & most seem to accept it a lot better when I tell them it makes me hurt all over, etc. than it I told them I am working on losing weight.
  • Witchdoctor58
    Witchdoctor58 Posts: 226 Member
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    "Just have a piece! I promise it won't kill you."


    I would like to share the true story of a co-worker at an office party. He had a piece of cake. He went into diabetic ketoacidosis. It killed him.
  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member
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    "Just have a piece! I promise it won't kill you."


    I would like to share the true story of a co-worker at an office party. He had a piece of cake. He went into diabetic ketoacidosis. It killed him.

    Good God.

    I've seen my mother in diabetic ketoacidosis. It was horrible.
  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member
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    I have never and I doubt I will ever meet someone who has sucked a d!ck in a dirty alley so they can get their next piece of cake/pie/ blah blah blah.

    Ummmm....I think this wins the prize for being the hands-down winner of the funniest single sentence I have ever seen in a thread on this site. :laugh:

    Of course you've never seen anyone suck d!ck for cake; cake is a legal, cheap substance you can get in any grocery store.

    The comment doesn't make any sense.
  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member
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    FFS this is still going on?
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    If that cake have a d!ck, she'd be sucking it.

    Cake is just THAT GOOD.

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