I DO NOT WANT my cake and I DO NOT WANT to eat it too...

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  • wamydia
    wamydia Posts: 259 Member
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    I don't think it's rude to turn down cake if you honestly don't want it. I do think it's rude to allow her to go ahead and buy or make something especially for you, show up with it, triumphantly show it to you, have you blow out the candles, cut you a piece and hand it to you, and then you said "no thanks, I don't want any cake." It would kind of make her look like a fool and probably make her feel a little dejected. It is much, much classier to call her up ahead of time and explain that you just don't like sweets and would much prefer to have something else special for your birthday (like an edible arrangment, as someone else suggested), but that you would really like for there to be some kind of cake or treat for the rest of the guests.
  • jonnythan
    jonnythan Posts: 10,161 Member
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    Honestly, you could cut a watermelon to look like a cake, and use fresh berries to make a sauce, using their own natural sugars over the watermelon. You could do whatever you like or make these suggestions.

    If I went to a birthday party and they served this concoction as the "birthday cake" I'd be rather disappointed. I have zero doubt that it would be the subject of conversation and laughter for years.
  • Fullsterkur_woman
    Fullsterkur_woman Posts: 2,712 Member
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    Honestly, you could cut a watermelon to look like a cake, and use fresh berries to make a sauce, using their own natural sugars over the watermelon. You could do whatever you like or make these suggestions.

    If I went to a birthday party and they served this concoction as the "birthday cake" I'd be rather disappointed. I have zero doubt that it would be the subject of conversation and laughter for years.
    For a grown-up, you seem awfully motivated by the avoidance of ridicule by others. It's weird, because I recall generally liking your posts.

    Other people's opinions of me are none of my business. I have to live my life according to what is right, regardless of what other people will say about it. Being laughed at doesn't absolve me of that responsibility.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    There are loads of alternatives out there. Call your sister-in-law and explain to her why you do not wish to eat cake. If she still brings it, then it's more for the others who associate 'cake' with birthdays.

    Honestly, you could cut a watermelon to look like a cake, and use fresh berries to make a sauce, using their own natural sugars over the watermelon. You could do whatever you like or make these suggestions.

    Eat cake, or do not. That's your choice.
    Is watermelon the new cauliflower?
  • atb0821
    atb0821 Posts: 458 Member
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    Can't you let yourself eat something yummy on your birthday?? I can see if you actually didn't like cake. But if you do, eat a piece! It's one day a year.

    For my birthday next month I'm already planning on bringing in donuts for the entire office (of which I will eat several), eating cake later, and going to a burger joint for lunch. And a yummy dinner. With more cake. Possibly later followed by more cake.
  • janinealfke
    janinealfke Posts: 93
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    You just say no thank you. I'm going to pass this year! And have something healthy with you to eat instead if you need to! Good for you, skipping it and Happy Birthday!!

    Janine Alfke
  • nyrina4life
    nyrina4life Posts: 196 Member
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    So... I'm confused. If there's no such thing as sugar addiction and it's just a lack of willpower, why are you all berating the OP for attempting to exercise willpower by not doing something that (possibly the case here, not sure) she knows will make her lose control? :huh:

    Whoever said there is no such thing as a sugar addiction, doesn't know what they're talking about. Specific substances to the body can be an addiction. The body has withdrawal symptoms, same as if you stopped taking drugs. I know I get headaches, and feel icky when I stop cold turkey and significantly reduce my sugar consumption. Same happens with caffeine consumption.
  • Fullsterkur_woman
    Fullsterkur_woman Posts: 2,712 Member
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    So... I'm confused. If there's no such thing as sugar addiction and it's just a lack of willpower, why are you all berating the OP for attempting to exercise willpower by not doing something that (possibly the case here, not sure) she knows will make her lose control? :huh:

    Whoever said there is no such thing as a sugar addiction, doesn't know what they're talking about. Specific substances to the body can be an addiction. The body has withdrawal symptoms, same as if you stopped taking drugs. I know I get headaches, and feel icky when I stop cold turkey and significantly reduce my sugar consumption. Same happens with caffeine consumption.
    I know. I'm not even arguing that point though. Just accepting their premise is sufficient to put them on thin ice, so I did.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    OK, ok. NO cake, how about cinnamon rolls?

    Cakeless-Birthdays.ashx
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    These are adorable and probably more like the right size people really want at a party and probably very few cals due to their darling size. To me these would seem just right for the b-day party of a grown female. sweet-rolls-5.jpg there would be no need for discussion of diets, the debil sugars, or anything else. They would seem chosen for cuteness, not diet.
  • Iron_Feline
    Iron_Feline Posts: 10,750 Member
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    OK, ok. NO cake, how about cinnamon rolls?

    Cakeless-Birthdays.ashx

    MINE :devil:
  • jonnythan
    jonnythan Posts: 10,161 Member
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    Honestly, you could cut a watermelon to look like a cake, and use fresh berries to make a sauce, using their own natural sugars over the watermelon. You could do whatever you like or make these suggestions.

    If I went to a birthday party and they served this concoction as the "birthday cake" I'd be rather disappointed. I have zero doubt that it would be the subject of conversation and laughter for years.
    For a grown-up, you seem awfully motivated by the avoidance of ridicule by others. It's weird, because I recall generally liking your posts.

    Other people's opinions of me are none of my business. I have to live my life according to what is right, regardless of what other people will say about it. Being laughed at doesn't absolve me of that responsibility.

    Not motivated by. Aware of.

    The basic choice here is to either eat a slice of birthday cake, with zero health or fitness consequences, or deal with people bringing up your "healthy cake" or "crazy diet" for years to come. One of these is a great deal less trouble than the other.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    Honestly, you could cut a watermelon to look like a cake, and use fresh berries to make a sauce, using their own natural sugars over the watermelon. You could do whatever you like or make these suggestions.

    If I went to a birthday party and they served this concoction as the "birthday cake" I'd be rather disappointed. I have zero doubt that it would be the subject of conversation and laughter for years.
    For a grown-up, you seem awfully motivated by the avoidance of ridicule by others. It's weird, because I recall generally liking your posts.

    Other people's opinions of me are none of my business. I have to live my life according to what is right, regardless of what other people will say about it. Being laughed at doesn't absolve me of that responsibility.

    it seems his only focus- is if people will be talking about him.

    For the record- I"m going to be talking about this later.

    1. to my friends
    2. to my gym friends
    3. on my other forums.

    just in case you were wondering buddy. and yes- I'm going to be laughing at you just so you have a heads up and you feel like I"m not doing it behind your back... I want you to know that it's going to happen so we are all square and fair.
  • Fullsterkur_woman
    Fullsterkur_woman Posts: 2,712 Member
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    Not motivated by. Aware of.

    The basic choice here is to either eat a slice of birthday cake, with zero health or fitness consequences, or deal with people bringing up your "healthy cake" or "crazy diet" for years to come. One of these is a great deal less trouble than the other.
    To each his own. I have plenty of weirdo idiosyncrasies that my family probably talks about me about behind my back. I know they do for other people, so I just assume that I'm included in that too. So what's one more thing?
  • mckshowie
    mckshowie Posts: 210 Member
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    aren't you divorced now? should have heeded the signs...
    I vomited immediately after my wedding cake tasting.



    I feel this is totally relevant and should be noted.



    Cake is evil.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    So... I'm confused. If there's no such thing as sugar addiction and it's just a lack of willpower, why are you all berating the OP for attempting to exercise willpower by not doing something that (possibly the case here, not sure) she knows will make her lose control?

    Maybe I missed a post, but where did the OP say she knew it would make her lose control?

    She said she doesn't eat sugar and fat because they're so bad. Which is a ridiculous reason to not have a freaking piece of cake on your birthday if you like cake.

    If you simply don't like cake, that's a different story.
  • Fullsterkur_woman
    Fullsterkur_woman Posts: 2,712 Member
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    it seems his only focus- is if people will be talking about him.

    For the record- I"m going to be talking about this later.

    1. to my friends
    2. to my gym friends
    3. on my other forums.

    just in case you were wondering buddy. and yes- I'm going to be laughing at you just so you have a heads up and you feel like I"m not doing it behind your back... I want you to know that it's going to happen so we are all square and fair.
    I'll probably have forgotten all about it by then, so not me. Sometimes I need somebody to remind me, "Carly, not every song is about you." :laugh:
  • jonnythan
    jonnythan Posts: 10,161 Member
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    Not motivated by. Aware of.

    The basic choice here is to either eat a slice of birthday cake, with zero health or fitness consequences, or deal with people bringing up your "healthy cake" or "crazy diet" for years to come. One of these is a great deal less trouble than the other.
    To each his own. I have plenty of weirdo idiosyncrasies that my family probably talks about me about behind my back. I know they do for other people, so I just assume that I'm included in that too. So what's one more thing?

    Considering the OP started a thread on MFP worried about how a refusal will be taken and interpreted by those close to her, it's safe to assume she's at least somewhat concerned about what those people think and say about her. Don't you think?
  • clarkeje1
    clarkeje1 Posts: 1,636 Member
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    Its your birthday, you do what you want.
  • peachfigs
    peachfigs Posts: 831 Member
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    I would let her know so that she can make alternative plans. Failing that, I'd just take a small piece and work it into my calories for the day.

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