Question for the ladies
Replies
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most guys are oblivious to flirting, or just idiots in general! unfortunately most women are also "unapproachable"
if suble flirting doesnt work just grow a lady pair and ask him out... the only way you will look like a tramp is is you say "hey wanna go out then later go up to my bedroom and have fun" <- dont do that!
"Hey are you busy later, wanna grab a bit to eat at (insert resturant here)" <- not trampish but gets the point across
Sadly, this is the only honest answer you've gotten. I find nothing wrong with being direct. If he doesn't feel the same way, he'll probably just think you're asking as friends.
This is why I didn't like this approach. I assume that because you are already good friends, that you already go eat places together. This won't make an impression on him. It leaves it open to him saying, "That's weird she asked me to go eat in the future. We eat all the time. Maybe she's just really wanting to try that place."
Or maybe if he is wondering abou tyou m this would be added in there: "I wish I knew if she liked me. I am totally into her but don't want to screw things up with our friendship. Ah. I will say yes, and we can each pay for our own, and then it will be safe."0 -
Just tell him you are in the market for a new *kitten* buddy and ask if he knows any good applicants...
if this doesnt make her sound like a tramp i'd be shocked!
if having **** buddies makes someone a tramp I am one hell of a tramp
How you doin'?0 -
maybe I should tell you all that He used to be into this one girl, and he didn't think many knew about it. One of his good friends found out I was interested, and told me that the guy I liked was into someone else. I dropped the girl's name to the guy who I like and he started freaking out about how I knew and he emphatically said it was over with that girl. What do you think this means?
It means its over with that girl
Gosh, I know that, but is there a deeper meaning?
He's a male. There is no deeper meaning.0 -
Drop subtle hints that you are interested in him. Ask him if he is seeing anyone, what kind of girls does he find attractive or interesting! Just check out if he feels jealous about you..flirt with other guys or just drop hint that you might be attracted to someone else and if he asks lot of questions or acts jealous- ask him upfront why he is behaving that way and if he is interested in you!!
This is the absolute wrong approach for me. I would just write you off as not interested in me, but the other guy you are flirting with, and move on.0 -
lotta tramps up in here0
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No. No games. No bringing other people into it. No trying to make him jealous. All of these could backfire. Be direct, ask him out on a date. Yes, call it a date. If he says no, then say okay how about we go "wherever" like we always do as friends. If he is really a friend then this shouldn't affect your friendship, you should be able to continue being friends no matter what. But I'd bet he is probably open to the idea of dating.
I can't believe I'm responding to this thread...
But, yeah - the above quote is correct.0 -
First are you looking for just sex or are you looking to have a "relationship" b/c if you are then you're already going in the right direction b/c you are friends already. I like one of the suggestions about grabbin a bite at a restaurant somewhere...I think the best thing you can do is just be honest with him, he'll respect you more for it IF he's a "good" guy and not a player. O and totally nix that whole "let's do the sex" unless that's what you're looking for... whatever you decide just remember to be up front0
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I'm also friends with his sister. Do you think I should ask her? She knows I'm interested in him, but she said she wouldn't tell him.
No. No games. No bringing other people into it. No trying to make him jealous. All of these could backfire. Be direct, ask him out on a date. Yes, call it a date. If he says no, then say okay how about we go "wherever" like we always do as friends. If he is really a friend then this shouldn't affect your friendship, you should be able to continue being friends no matter what. But I'd bet he is probably open to the idea of dating.
This.0 -
If you have been friends for a year, you should be able to tell if he has any interests in you as more than a friend.
You need to decide if you are better friends or if it is worth wreaking it to try and have a relationship and it doesn't work out.
Good Luck!0 -
maybe I should tell you all that He used to be into this one girl, and he didn't think many knew about it. One of his good friends found out I was interested, and told me that the guy I liked was into someone else. I dropped the girl's name to the guy who I like and he started freaking out about how I knew and he emphatically said it was over with that girl. What do you think this means?
It means its over with that girl
Gosh, I know that, but is there a deeper meaning?
: ) Who knows? If you seriously consider this guy a friend and really want more, then you are going to have to learn to communicate with him at some point. Might as well be now. I cannot count the times that I have built something up in my head to a point where I almost couldn't (or really couldn't) address it. But you know what? With very few exceptions, the times when I just had an honest, direct conversation with someone or about something that really mattered to me, it was completely worth it and usually productive, even when it wasn't the outcome I hoped for.
The things that matter the most can certainly be the hardest, but they have the most valuable payoff as well.
Maybe he's into you and you get your wish. Maybe he's not, but that doesn't have to ruin your friendship. Being honest and talking it out can actually add a layer of depth to a friendship that might be lacking beforehand. And at least you won't be wondering anymore.
Btw, I had a friend many years ago. I had quite a crush on him for about a minute. Then I learned that he is a thousand times better as a friend than as a boyfriend. He has been through many girlfriends, but he is still one of my closest friends and I wouldn't date him if you paid me. You just can't always tell how things are going to turn out, but wondering sucks. And if you set yourself up to always wonder, well, it'll always suck.0 -
How do you subtly let a guy know that you are interested without outright asking him, and without looking like a tramp?
I usually make him some compliments, try to cheer him up when he's sad, listen carefully everytime he says something, always ask him if there's something I can do for him or just in general tell him that I care about him and such things.
It's not like I've tried it out so many times, just once probably, and it worked, so... if he's not gay and if he's not completely uninterested it should work.0 -
I'm far from subtle...I'm blunt and let it be known. Why *****foot around it?0
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From my boyfriend: "Guys are stupid about things like that. Just ask him out."0
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I'm far from subtle...I'm blunt and let it be known. Why *****foot around it?
I am extremely entertained that "pussiefoot" was blocked by the censor. Oh noes. No talking about walking around like a cat on MFP!!0 -
Ugh! I have no idea either. Dating is so annoying!0
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This thread makes me glad I'm married. Whew.0
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Hey.
I just met you.
And this is crazy.
Here's my number.
Cal me maybe?
:laugh:
I LITERALLY just did this over the weekend. I've been in love with this dude who owns this shop I frequent. ...we kinda talk/flirt weekly, and he finally gave me a card with his contact info on it, so I emailed him and hit him with the 'call me maybe'. We'll see!0 -
I'm also friends with his sister. Do you think I should ask her? She knows I'm interested in him, but she said she wouldn't tell him.
No. No games. No bringing other people into it. No trying to make him jealous. All of these could backfire. Be direct, ask him out on a date. Yes, call it a date. If he says no, then say okay how about we go "wherever" like we always do as friends. If he is really a friend then this shouldn't affect your friendship, you should be able to continue being friends no matter what. But I'd bet he is probably open to the idea of dating.
THIS!
No games. No other people. 'Man up'. Big girl panties. Call it a date.
Sunday a guy friend I like and I were talking about hanging out. We had hung out on Friday, but it wasn't specified as a date, I wasn't sure it was. So on Sunday when he said how's this sound for a plan, I said it's a date! And it was a date. Short, sweet and to the point.
No games. No bs. Straight up hey I like you, let's date.0 -
maybe I should tell you all that He used to be into this one girl, and he didn't think many knew about it. One of his good friends found out I was interested, and told me that the guy I liked was into someone else. I dropped the girl's name to the guy who I like and he started freaking out about how I knew and he emphatically said it was over with that girl. What do you think this means?
It means its over with that girl
Gosh, I know that, but is there a deeper meaning?
You are doing what most women do all too often and is...."THINKING TOO MUCH!!"0 -
If women would stop thinking they had to be subtle about it and just ask men what they think all the worlds problems would be instantly solved.
Your kitty is so cute. I just want to pet it....
thank you... that was my fav pic with him... he passed away Dec 29th 2012... at 21 years old....miss him everyday
So sorry for your loss!0 -
Just tell him you are in the market for a new *kitten* buddy and ask if he knows any good applicants...
This sounds like advice that the person in the FWB thread took.0 -
A little bit of come hither eye contact coupled with some downward gazes afterwards. You don't have to say a thing. It is hard for a man to mistake it for anything else. This is the flirtation that has existed in humans since the beginning of time.
It is usually enough to get them to come closer, pique their interest, get them to make a move. And if he isn't interested in you, you dob't have to feel embarrassed about anything. You just used feminine body language.0 -
A little bit of come hither eye contact coupled with some downward gazes afterwards. You don't have to say a thing. It is hard for a man to mistake it for anything else. This is the flirtation that has existed in humans since the beginning of time.
It is usually enough to get them to come closer, pique their interest, get them to make a move. And if he isn't interested in you, you dob't have to feel embarrassed about anything. You just used feminine body language.
what if I flash him? is that feminine body language too?0 -
If women would stop thinking they had to be subtle about it and just ask men what they think all the worlds problems would be instantly solved.
^0 -
Always better to be direct. "Hey, I like you, do you have any interest in maybe going out on a date some time?"
That does not make you a tramp, and if he does think that, you're better off without his friendship to begin with.0 -
so i was in this situation one time.. and so i just decided to do it.
I asked him out on a date and he said yes... !
9 years later we are married (7 Years) and 2 kids .. mortgage the dog .. the whole shabang!
Just ask.. you got nothing to loose. :flowerforyou: :blushing: 
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A little bit of come hither eye contact coupled with some downward gazes afterwards. You don't have to say a thing. It is hard for a man to mistake it for anything else. This is the flirtation that has existed in humans since the beginning of time.
It is usually enough to get them to come closer, pique their interest, get them to make a move. And if he isn't interested in you, you dob't have to feel embarrassed about anything. You just used feminine body language.
what if I flash him? is that feminine body language too?
Those are some tigress moves, Hayley. I use those on my husband.0 -
A little bit of come hither eye contact coupled with some downward gazes afterwards. You don't have to say a thing. It is hard for a man to mistake it for anything else. This is the flirtation that has existed in humans since the beginning of time.
It is usually enough to get them to come closer, pique their interest, get them to make a move. And if he isn't interested in you, you dob't have to feel embarrassed about anything. You just used feminine body language.
what if I flash him? is that feminine body language too?
Those are some tigress moves, Hayley. I use those on my husband.
does he pay all the bills? if so... NOTED.0 -
Thank you all for your advice and support! I think I'll just ask who he's interested in, and see where it goes from there. I'll let you all know what he says
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Why not just ask him out instead of beating around the bush?0
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