Not interested in my husband anymore

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Replies

  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
    I care about everything (sans fat & ignorant people). That's why my life is insanely awesome. :D

    I think you should stick with the Rate Me threads.

    1/10. Would not bang.
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    I'd love to meet some of you people in real life. It would definitely be a trip.

    I'm cool with all the insults. After all, if people like you didn't have the interwebz ... there'd be virtually no social interaction. Except maybe with your clinical psychologist, or proctologist.

    Have fun. I'm off to eat sushi and watch a Keanu Reeves movie.

    "You internet people are losers!"
    -Internet person.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    I'd love to meet some of you people in real life. It would definitely be a trip.

    I'm cool with all the insults. After all, if people like you didn't have the interwebz ... there'd be virtually no social interaction. Except maybe with your clinical psychologist, or proctologist.

    Have fun. I'm off to eat sushi and watch a Keanu Reeves movie.

    Have a nice flounce.
  • Letje_Lux
    Letje_Lux Posts: 31
    Sounds like you lost some weight and think you're too good for him now.

    If you ruin things with your husband, have fun on the divorcee dating market.
  • NikkiSixGuns
    NikkiSixGuns Posts: 630 Member
    There is an old story about a divorce lawyer who tells a client who cannot afford the divorce to go home and spend three months treating the spouse the way they think they should be treated, do stuff for them, compliment them, talk, flirt, date, touch, hold hands, be the best friend and lover they can be and then in 3 months come back and if they still want the divorce the lawyer would do it for free.

    In three months the person called the lawyer back and said they saved the marriage, as they started doing all of these things for the spouse the spouse then started treating them the same way, with love and respect. They rekindled what they had in the beginning and no longer wanted a divorce.

    My opinion, Say nothing about this to him. It's not your husbands problem, it's yours. Start by figuring out what the real problem is and work on that first. Work on you and your commitment to him. Then if you feel like his weight really is an issue you can talk about that in a loving way with him. Tell him you are concerned about his health and that you want him to be around for your child.

    I completely agree with this one.

    There's a worthwhile message in there that's similar to what's in the book "His Needs, Her Needs". I know I said it before, but I really urge you to read it! It discusses the different emotional needs that men & women have and how important they are to an all-around satisfying relationship.

    It's a heck of a lot cheaper than therapy, and a great place to start educating yourself.
  • Sovictorrious
    Sovictorrious Posts: 770 Member
    I'd love to meet some of you people in real life. It would definitely be a trip.

    I'm cool with all the insults. After all, if people like you didn't have the interwebz ... there'd be virtually no social interaction. Except maybe with your clinical psychologist, or proctologist.

    Have fun. I'm off to eat sushi and watch a Keanu Reeves movie.

    tumblr_inline_mt7cddl5Wj1rzpp2t_zps78331f04.gif


    Don't you dare ruin Keanu Reeves movies for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    I care about everything (sans fat & ignorant people). That's why my life is insanely awesome. :D

    I think you should stick with the Rate Me threads.

    1/10. Would not bang.

    I wouldnt bang me either.
  • kyleekay10
    kyleekay10 Posts: 1,812 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.
  • skinnybunny_x
    skinnybunny_x Posts: 449
    This isn't the Real Housewives of Atlanta, and you most certainly aren't NeNe.

    I've never even spoken to you, wtf? I guess I'm just that much fun to argue with.

    That annoying as **** animation makes no sense, considering this is a site dedicated to fitness and being healthy. And also considering I ate Popeyes twice this weekend ... although I did have lettuce on my crawfish po' boy.
  • fitmomhappymom
    fitmomhappymom Posts: 171 Member
    I think the issue doesn’t lie so much with your husband, as it does with the way you perceive your husband. He was good enough to get your engine going when you were dating, and I'm guessing even after pregnancy and all the havoc that wrecked on your body he still finds you absolutely attractive.
    I think its fantastic that you have made positive changes in your life that will most definitely improve your health, but I think you're making sex more of a mental activity than it should be. Passion and great sex aren't contingent on your physical appearance. If that were the case you would have had these issues with your sex life from the start with your husband. Instead of focusing on what he looks like, why not close your eyes and focus on how he is making you feel? Stop over-thinking his appearance and just let go and let your body respond naturally. Have a few drinks and loosen up. Try to make sex more of a game than just an act. Take your brain out of the equation and just have fun and enjoy yourself.
    Whatever you do, DO NOT tell your husband you don’t find him attractive. That will not help anything.
  • mlrd2010
    mlrd2010 Posts: 33
    I'd love to meet some of you people in real life. It would definitely be a trip.

    I'm cool with all the insults. After all, if people like you didn't have the interwebz ... there'd be virtually no social interaction. Except maybe with your clinical psychologist, or proctologist.

    Have fun. I'm off to eat sushi and watch a Keanu Reeves movie.

    AND bad taste in movies. You just ARE a hot little mess, aren'tcha?
  • skinnybunny_x
    skinnybunny_x Posts: 449
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    I am a know it all when it comes to lupus, I've had it since I was 14.
  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
    I care about everything (sans fat & ignorant people). That's why my life is insanely awesome. :D

    I think you should stick with the Rate Me threads.

    1/10. Would not bang.

    I wouldnt bang me either.

    Oh! Let me rephrase... Reality = 10/10; would bang

    Crazy psycho "woman" = 1/10; would not bang.
  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    I am a know it all when it comes to lupus, I've had it since I was 14.

    Just go get your sushi and leave, you non-internet person.
  • suziepoo1984
    suziepoo1984 Posts: 915 Member
    I would like to think its just a rough patch in the marriage or you are just bored of him(could happen after being together for many years together for a few people) and renew your attraction towards him in some way. How about going away from him for a few days, visit friends/family and see if you start missing him sexually?
    I know when i was away from my hubby for 4 months once, i jumped on him as soon as he entered home LOL

    Having a baby totally changes things in a marriage and you would need to work really hard the initial few months/years.
    You say he is your best friend, so i guess it would be best to talk it out with him. I hope he does not take it too hard though.
    For e.g: My husband is my best friend too and you would not believe the bluntness i share with him. I tell him everything, if i dont like something, i like something. If he feels bad, i know how to calm him down too as we have known each other so well :)
    good luck and :flowerforyou:
  • kyleekay10
    kyleekay10 Posts: 1,812 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    I am a know it all when it comes to lupus, I've had it since I was 14.

    :huh:

    I wasn't referring to your lupus.

    I'm referring to all the marriage advice, and now apparently fat-shaming that you're doing.

    ETA: I also have chronic health issues. But it doesn't make me cool and I don't run around on the forums trying to solicit sympathy from complete strangers.
  • kyleekay10
    kyleekay10 Posts: 1,812 Member
    Serious response for the OP:

    Pick up a copy of the Love Dare, and try it out with your husband. It's a great book and I've seen it do wonders for suffering relationships.
  • grentea
    grentea Posts: 96 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    I am a know it all when it comes to lupus, I've had it since I was 14.

    You are extremely hostile. Please leave. You don't have anything valid to offer. Didn't you say you were going to watch a movie?
  • ileitch
    ileitch Posts: 99
    Just do it.
    And read this blog: http://www.thehappilyeverafterproject.com/
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    Yes and please stop making those of us who have debilitating illnesses look like we are completely lacking in compassion.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    I am a know it all when it comes to lupus, I've had it since I was 14.

    Your sushi is getting cold. And your movie isn't going to have a better actor if you wait.
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    interesting reads:
    http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/apr/15/science-of-love-robin-dunbar

    http://www.apa.org/monitor/2011/03/hormones.aspx (further to my earlier post... maybe your husband's testosterone levels are dropping and it's changing the way you react to him)
  • walleyclan1
    walleyclan1 Posts: 2,784 Member
    I think it is a problem with you, not him so I wouldn't do anything rash. Nobody will make you happy right now if this man you love so much can't. Figure out what is going on with you and work on that.
  • PhearlessPhreaks
    PhearlessPhreaks Posts: 890 Member
    Hey OP, I didn't read through all 10 pages, (I stopped after the first three, earlier, when there were only 3...) BUT- I just wanted to share this sentiment...

    There's being "in love" and then there's love. Perhaps you are not currently "in love" (which is often intertwined with lust) with your husband? The good news is, you can fall in love with him again. It takes time, and it takes you relying on the underlying love- the choice and act of choosing your husband and marriage over your current dissatisfaction. We fall in and out of love with our spouses many times over the course of a marriage, and while some might not define it as I have, rare is the marriage where both partners remained as in love and passionate about the other as they were the day they wed. Like the moon, the *emotion* of love waxes and wanes and for many that includes sexual desire.

    I doubt that reminding yourself of how amazing he is and how much he deserves a loyal, loving wife will help you much- it might be more helpful to remind yourself what attracted you to him in the first place. What about him did you find absolutely irresistible? What made you want him sexually? Figuring how how to make yourself feel that again may help things.

    It hurts my heart that you're experiencing this (and, that your husband is too) and I wish I could help you more, but I'm not in your shoes. I only know what I've learned from my parents 35 years of marriage. :flowerforyou:
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    And your movie isn't going to have a better actor if you wait.

    LOL! Excellent
  • DiaryofaMadFatMan
    DiaryofaMadFatMan Posts: 131 Member
    Sounds like you lost some weight and think you're too good for him now.

    If you ruin things with your husband, have fun on the divorcee dating market.

    Exactly what I was thinking
  • kyleekay10
    kyleekay10 Posts: 1,812 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    Yes and please stop making those of us who have debilitating illnesses look like we are completely lacking in compassion.

    Also, this.
  • skinnybunny_x
    skinnybunny_x Posts: 449
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    I am a know it all when it comes to lupus, I've had it since I was 14.

    :huh:

    I wasn't referring to your lupus.

    I'm referring to all the marriage advice, and now apparently fat-shaming that you're doing.

    ETA: I also have chronic health issues. But it doesn't make me cool and I don't run around on the forums trying to solicit sympathy from complete strangers.

    I got enough sympathy this weekend at the hospital. It drives me crazy when nurses apologize for sticking me, it's like just do it and get it the **** over with so I can resume my life.

    Having lupus is definitely not cool. I have RA like a 60 year old man. During a bad spell, which is about once every couple of months, I'm puking and ****ting every thirty minutes because of my migraines and vertigo.

    Today is one of my good days. Which is why I'm in a fabulous mood, here eating my Paradise Roll and watching The Matrix, even though I'm being bashed. :]
  • MissyJessy
    MissyJessy Posts: 1,279 Member
    i walk away for 3 minutes and this thing blowsssss up! now i have to read all the way back... thanks everybody :mad:
  • kyleekay10
    kyleekay10 Posts: 1,812 Member
    A trying time in your life?

    Don't even go there.

    I have lupus, a debilitating disease. It's a struggle for me to even get out of bed, let alone work out. Or cook. Or be in a good mood. But I do all of these things for my husband. Nearly every damn day.

    You've gone on and on about how great your husband is and how wonderful your life is with him. So ... if you don't have depression, or some other kind of mental illness, then you are a truly ego maniacal woman. You have so much to be thankful for, stop your *****ing and moaning and enjoy your loved ones.

    Please stop making the rest of us 23 year olds look like immature know-it-alls.

    I am a know it all when it comes to lupus, I've had it since I was 14.

    :huh:

    I wasn't referring to your lupus.

    I'm referring to all the marriage advice, and now apparently fat-shaming that you're doing.

    ETA: I also have chronic health issues. But it doesn't make me cool and I don't run around on the forums trying to solicit sympathy from complete strangers.

    I got enough sympathy this weekend at the hospital. It drives me crazy when nurses apologize for sticking me, it's like just do it and get it the **** over with so I can resume my life.

    Having lupus is definitely not cool. I have RA like a 60 year old man. During a bad spell, which is about once every couple of months, I'm puking and ****ting every thirty minutes because of my migraines and vertigo.

    Today is one of my good days. Which is why I'm in a fabulous mood, here eating my Paradise Roll and watching The Matrix, even though I'm being bashed. :]

    We get it. You have lupus. If you want attention for that, start a new thread.

    I'm just kind of stunned today is a "fabulous mood day" for you, considering all the angry posts you've left here.
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