The thread where people give really bad running advice!

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Replies

  • 1_JR_1
    1_JR_1 Posts: 179
    People love running with dogs, so bring all of yours.... especially to the REALLY large races. You'll make lots and lots of friends.
  • allisoncook87
    allisoncook87 Posts: 160 Member
    This whole thing is cracking me up!
  • Serah87
    Serah87 Posts: 5,481 Member
    Trip people so you can win.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Couch to 5k runners should repeat Week 4 until they feel ready for the 20 minute run.
  • CarlKRobbo
    CarlKRobbo Posts: 390 Member
    Run on all fours... It works for cheetahs...
  • RunBrew
    RunBrew Posts: 220 Member
    Running at anything slower than race-pace isn't making you faster.
    Go all out, or don't run.
  • 1_JR_1
    1_JR_1 Posts: 179
    For the women...... stopping in the middle of the race course to pee is perfectly acceptable behavior as long as you don't leave your used toilet paper on the road.
  • brandiuntz
    brandiuntz Posts: 2,717 Member
    Headphones for music are so last year. Wear Bluetooth speakers so everyone can listen to your inspirational music!
  • CarlKRobbo
    CarlKRobbo Posts: 390 Member
    Jump the gun. Take shourtcut's - as many as possible, it's fine no one will ever know...
  • itsfruitcake
    itsfruitcake Posts: 146 Member
    You can measure the temperature by looking outside through your window and then dress according to what it looks like. Don't bother checking the actual weather forecast.

    (I do this all the freaking time though and end up with way too much or little to wear, duh :laugh:)
  • 1_JR_1
    1_JR_1 Posts: 179
    During a race, you can save time by drafting off of the guy ahead of you.... but you gotta be reaaalllly close..... like "bumping uglies" close.
  • kgeyser
    kgeyser Posts: 22,505 Member
    Train on the elliptical whenever possible. Remember to keep your arms in same position as they are on the machine and mimic the movement during the race.
  • CarlKRobbo
    CarlKRobbo Posts: 390 Member
    Screw the full race.. Wait 100 meters from the finish line, Jump on the leader like a lion, bring them down, rob their clothes\number, and win the race
  • Stoshew71
    Stoshew71 Posts: 6,553 Member
    Wear the clothes you plan to run in the race all week prior and work hard. Don't wash your clothes for the race tho. You need to keep that good work ethic vibe you built up all week.
  • CarlKRobbo
    CarlKRobbo Posts: 390 Member
    Before you race, Drink at least 10 pints of Lager, 10 shots, 10 vodka's, and 10 whisky's, The last thing you want is to be cold and dehydrated
  • pittbullgirl
    pittbullgirl Posts: 341 Member
    Don't waste time running outside! Running on the treadmill is exactly the same, but with easy TV access!

    I have to do this in crappy (non warm weather) due to bad asthma :/
    I feel so "less than" right now.
  • summerroxygoodin
    summerroxygoodin Posts: 62 Member
    Eat at least a gallon of oatmeal the day before and morning of the run.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Skip the last half of your marathon by cabbing it to the finish line. You might set a new course record.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Don't waste time running outside! Running on the treadmill is exactly the same, but with easy TV access!

    I have to do this in crappy (non warm weather) due to bad asthma :/
    I feel so "less than" right now.

    So do I.
  • sukiwabi
    sukiwabi Posts: 221 Member
    The day before you run, go break you squat\deadlift PR by at least 20lb's, then do 100 rep drops sets. Reward yourself with a nice Vindaloo

    This actually made me double over in lolz :laugh:
  • kelsully
    kelsully Posts: 1,008 Member
    Go get XYZ shoes because they are perfect for me.

    Always run more and faster. Slow running is bad for you.
  • butterthebean
    butterthebean Posts: 2 Member
    Never ever walk during a run. If you walk at all....you're not a real runner.
  • Serah87
    Serah87 Posts: 5,481 Member
    The best place to buy a good pair of running shoes is Walmart.
  • BrianSharpe
    BrianSharpe Posts: 9,248 Member
    Start your first 5K (even if you're pushing a stroller) from the very first corral. The elites don't mind going around you and your 3 friends while you walk and hold hands......
  • metaphoria
    metaphoria Posts: 1,432 Member
    Alternate going forward and backwards to stretch out your muscles and confuse them for maximum calorie burn!

    Wool is the best material for running clothes.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels
  • Ejourneys
    Ejourneys Posts: 1,603 Member
    Shoes, smooze, run barefoot like our ancestors did.

    Hey, worked for Zola Budd!

    But enough about all those racing clothes; jeans are just fine. Skinny jeans, even. Heck, leather!
  • jturnerx
    jturnerx Posts: 325 Member
    The first thing you should do as a new runner is HIIT and Tabata intervals - every day.
  • ThickMcRunFast
    ThickMcRunFast Posts: 22,511 Member
    Your first ever fitness/running goal should be to complete a marathon ...

    Marathon? Pshhaw. Couch to marathon is nice and all, but anyone with even a bit of fitness should start with Couch to Ultra.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    I've had a foot problem near the base of my fifth metatarsal that started four days ago...and it started two days after my last run...so maybe everyone should just do what I've done for real...even though I thought I was being reasonable in my approach. *shrug*

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